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keylimebeag · 14 days ago

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jealous

jackson!joel miller x reader

cw: explicit smut (minors dni), jealous!joel miller, pwp, pre-established relationship (fwb), alcohol consumption, swearing, dirty talk, angry sex, exhibitionism sorta (they're in public but no one sees), light choking, use of a gag (panties oops), fingering, teasing, begging, a HINT of assplay, joel is ferallll but so is reader hahaha

wc: 1.5k

a/n: hello all in order to distract us from the trauma of season 2 here is a jealous joel miller fic. things get nasty but that's how we like it.

masterlist

Joel’s knuckles were white as he kept a grip on his whiskey, sipping it slowly, deliberately, imagining his white knuckles knocking out the guy’s teeth.

The guy with his hands around your waist, on your ass.

He knew you were doing it on purpose.

Dancing, flirting, glowing in the lights of the dance hall.

Joel savored the burn of the whiskey, trying to distract himself from your smile, your laughs, your touch, none for him. He supposed he deserved the punishment, but the way you were dancing… pure cruelty, if he were being honest.

It was past midnight, Jackson’s young kids sound asleep, and the music and dancing took on a new spirit. Instead of the family-friendly twirling and turning, intimacy cast a shadow over the dance floor, lights dimmed and everything slightly hazy with the lighting of cigars.

Cigars thanks to you, getting lucky on a patrol in an abandoned rich neighborhood. Joel wondered how much people were willing to trade with you, giving away whatever they could just for the burn of tobacco on their tongue.

Joel wanted the burn of something else, something other than whiskey, or a cigar.

–

You’d been watching him the whole night, glooming in the corner of the hall, a dark shadow coiling with rage.

You’d known what your dancing would do to him, pressed close to men younger than him, smaller than him.

His last words, spoken in the soft light of sunrise pouring through his bedroom curtains, echoed in your head as you fixed your eyes on him.

We both know I'm no good for you, too old, too mean. Better for both of us that this never happens again.

You hoped he burned at the sight of your hands on another man, another man you both knew you didn’t want.

A grin spread across your face as Joel sipped his whiskey, a slight shake in his hand. A loaded gun, cocked, and ready to fire.

He tilted his head, his dark eyes on you lighting your body with desire.

As the clock struck one in the morning, you unraveled yourself from the man you’d been dancing with, giving him a polite smile, and wished him goodnight. Although he was a good dancer, there was only one man you wanted coming home with you.

If you played your cards right, he would be.

Keeping your eyes forward, passing Joel entirely, you left the hall with a smile.

The night was cold, late fall casting a chill over Jackson. Frost covered the ground, and your breaths were white with warmth. Only a handful of people wandered the streets, sleepy quiet overtaking the town.

Boots that weren’t yours crunched the grass behind you, and you knew who followed without having to turn around.

You grinned to yourself, keeping your eyes fixed ahead. Keeping him chasing.

Climbing the steps of your house, the boots behind you went quiet, as if he were hesitating.

You put a hand on the front door, but didn’t turn the knob.

There was silence for a moment as you waited, until the boots moved again. Loud thumps against the wood of your porch, slow, deliberate. A shadow rose behind you, not touching, but his voice sending goosebumps down your arm as he spoke for the first time.

“You gonna open that door, or I’m gonna fuck you right here on the porch?”

Desire shuddered through your body, and you gripped the door handle to keep from jumping on him. “I thought you said this was never happening again.”

Joel growled. “That was before you grinded up on guys you don’t belong to. Now, open that door, or the neighbors will be gettin’ one hell of a show.”

Letting go of the handle, you turned to face him, anger panging through you. “‘You don’t belong to?’”

Joel clenched his jaw, stepping forward until your back pressed against the wood door. His dark eyes peered into yours, and as he spoke, his whiskey scented breath mingled with yours.

“Don’t lie and say you were doin’ all that dancing just for fun,” Joel growled. “Don’t pretend that you wanted any of those boys.”

You huffed a laugh. “Yeah? And what do I want, Joel? You tell me.”

Joel straightened, stiffened. “I don’t know.”

“Now who’s the fucking liar?” You hissed, pushing him back with both hands on his chest.

Joel grunted at the impact, his eyes darkening. In an instant, his hand wrapped around your throat, not hard, just enough to keep you pinned against the door. Arousal flooded your core, and you gave him a wicked grin.

“What do I want, Joel? Do I want a nice little man and a picket fence? Do I want to be left the fuck alone?" You smirked, breathing to let him smell the booze on your tongue. "Or do I want to be fucked so hard I don’t remember my own name?”

“Careful, girl,” he hummed, your pulse thundering under his fingertips.

“You’re the one that followed me like a dog on a leash,” You breathed, pushing his hand off of your throat with a shove. “Too old, too mean, remember?”

Joel was silent, though his nose brushed against yours like he was barely keeping from sinking his teeth in.

When you spoke, your voice was low, and raw. “Didn’t you ever think that maybe I like my men old and mean?”

Joel grabbed the neck of your shirt, pulling you away from the door in a single tug. Pushing you forward, he bent you over the rail of your porch, your hips biting into the wood as you caught yourself.

Behind you, Joel grinded his hips into your ass, denim on denim, his cock hard pressing through his jeans. He leaned over your bent torso, whispering in your ear.

“You stay bent over like this until I’m done with you, and maybe I’ll give you what you want so badly.”

You huffed a laugh. “Oh, what’s that, old man?”

“To come on my cock so many times that you lose count,” he growled, reaching around to unzip your jeans.

You tensed, eyes scanning the street where party stragglers stumbled to bed. “Joel, there’s people out here–”

“Better stay quiet then, huh?” He said, pulling down your waistband roughly, making you moan at the force. “Oh, baby, your sweet little cunt is droolin’.”

He pulled at the elastic of your soaked panties, making you yelp out into the dark street as the cloth snapped against your core.

“You know better than that, baby.”

In an instant, Joel tugged your panties up, up, up, pulling the cloth roughly into your cunt before the fabric ripped against your skin. You whimpered, unable to stifle your desire as he quite literally tore the panties from your pussy.

Cunt exposed, Joel drove a finger into your slick like he couldn’t help himself, and as you moaned in response, he stuffed your soaked panties into your open mouth.

“Much better, baby, much better,” Joel groaned quietly, like he didn’t even care if you heard him or not. You keened at the praise, his calloused finger tracing patterns up and down your soaked core. “I know all of this is for me, even though you’ll pretend it’s not. Your little stunt at the dance did the trick you wanted it to, right?”

The digit slipped inside of you, in and out before you even had a chance to react. You squirmed under his touch, and he pressed his free hand against your spine to hold you against the wood.

“I never was a jealous man,” he rambled, playing with you. “Not until I met you. Not until I saw the way every man in this damn town drooled over you. Not until you let me into your bed, and I was stupid enough to leave it.”

You arched against the wood, desperate, your moans stifled by the panties between your teeth.

“Poor thing, been missin’ me, huh?”

Your eyes fluttered as he pushed two fingers into your weeping cunt, curving them to press against your g-spot with the same precision he uses to pull the trigger of a rifle.

“I’ll let you come on my fingers if you admit that you’ve missed me, baby,” Joel growled, playing with your core like his favorite toy. Your whine of pleasure was muffled by the gag in your mouth, but he chuckled at the sound. “Having trouble?”

He thrusted his fingers in and out, in and out, winding you up tighter and tighter. A tidal wave rose in your belly, and he knew it.

“C’mon, speak up,” he teased, curling his fingers expertly.

You mouthed around the panties, desperate for him to give you what you want. Humming with delight, he dug his free hand into your mouth, pulling out the panties as you gasped for breath.

“I missed you so much, Joel,” you cried, forgetting where and who you were as he pushed a third finger into your core.

“Then why were you dancin’ with another man, grindin’ on him like a little slut?”

“I-I wanted to make you jealous, I wanted you to want me–”

“Oh, baby, you ain’t gotta do nothin’ for me to want you,” he drawled, and mercifully pressed a fingertip against your neglected clit, and you moaned into the night. “Now, come for me, baby. Prove just how much you missed me.”

You obeyed with a cry, your cunt pulsed in response, his fingers relentless on your skin. Your core clenched around him, nails biting into the wooden railing as you came on his hand. Your knees buckled slightly, and he drove a hand into your hair, pulling your head up.

“No, no, no, baby, we’re not done yet.”

Joel pulled his fingers from you slowly, chuckling at the whimpers that left your lips. Lightly, he traced his soaked fingertips up the curve of your ass, circling that tight ring of muscle above your wet cunt.

“Get inside. Or I’ll take this ass right here.”

#joel miller #joel miller smut #jackson!joel miller #the last of us fic #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfiction #literally all i want #just ughhh #like 🫠🫠🫠#i have no shame #i would actually cry

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keylimebeag · 15 days ago

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Inertia Pt. 8

pairing: Javier Peña x f!DEAagent!reader

summary: You start the day with a quiet morning with Alex and reflect on your conflicting feelings about him leaving. At work, you try to keep it together when it seems like Javi is MIA. Upon his return, he puts you in a bit of a predicament and it sends you into spiral as you get ready to host Alex's going away party that night.

tags/warnings: E-rated: MDNI!!, ❤️‍🔥 slow burn❤️‍🔥, no use of Y/N, angst, hella yearning, kind of jealous!Javi & reader, stupid dumb dumb idiots in love, reader is slowly losing her mf mind any time she is pushed closer to facing reality, unprotected PIV, f!masturbation(kind of), unhealthy coping mechanisms at an all time high, accidental drunk driving, reader doesn't have any complete physical descriptions but has a juicy booty and hair long enough to tuck behind her ears, implied looming infidelity, imagining someone else while fucking, fuckin' language (one drop of the C word), drinking, smoking--all the shit that is fun but bad for you

word count: 9.2k

note: Shit is getting real lol

thank you @sunshinehaze1 for giving it a once-over & @peepawispunk for those couple extra sexy words (you know the ones 😜)

When you arrive at the office, you keep your head down as you walk to your desk. You feel a bit silly that you’re this nervous about running into Javi this morning. It's not like he can actually read your mind and see what you did before you got here.

No, he can’t read your mind—but he can read you well enough to know when something is up and therein lies the problem.

You make it to your desk undetected and smile to yourself when you see a fresh coffee—not from the shitty cafeteria—and your favorite Colombian pastry waiting for you. You place your bag on the floor next to your chair as you sit down and find a little note from Javi underneath the brown paper bag that says he’ll catch you sometime later today. You try not to cheese too hard when you look up and realize you’re being watched by Katie and crew from the other side of the room. You shoot a sickly sweet smile and a good morning wave their way. She must’ve seen him drop off your little gift.

As you pull out your notebook to start looking through whatever you scribbled down the day before, you catch a quick glimpse of Javi being whisked away—flanked by some other people who look like politicians of some sort—in a hurry to head off somewhere. You feel a jolt of anxiety shoot through you as you briefly catch his eye as they pass you. He doesn’t look the least bit thrilled to be doing whatever it is they’re taking him to do and you feel a bit confused because he hasn’t been able to brief you on what’s going on. You figure it must be above your pay grade so you shrug and take solace in the fact that it seems like he’ll be out of the office for at least a little while. At least you’ll have some space to breathe and put a mental distance between the Javi in your dreams and the real Javi until he gets back.

Plus, who were you kidding. You were still thinking about the way he looked at you when he kissed your cheek last night too. That was very much not a dream despite the dreamy, hazy way it had made you feel.

A little later in the morning, you go over to Katie’s desk when the other girls have their pre-lunch chit-chat sesh to ask if they heard anything before you got here this morning. Most of the group shrugs and are just as confused as you are, but Katie decides this is her opportunity to make a quip.

“Shouldn’t you know? Isn’t he, like, your best friend or something?” she rolls her eyes.

This bitch.

“Or something…” you laugh under your breath, “you know, Katie, just because he rejected you doesn’t mean you can just be a complete cunt to me. I had nothing to do with it. As a matter of fact, I tried to protect you from this exact outcome, but you didn’t wanna listen.”

A chorus of “Mmm hm,” “yeah,” and “actually she’s kind of right, Katie” breaks out across the group and you finally feel a little validated in thinking her attitude towards you has been unwarranted.

“Anyways, this isn’t what I came over here for, so unless you know what’s up, I’m just gonna get back to work,” you turn to walk about to your desk and hear Katie whisper when she thinks you’re out of ear shot.

“I mean okay, whatever but you can’t tell me they both haven’t been acting weird since he got here.”

You sigh in annoyance at yourself, mainly. Was it really that obvious or is she just hyper focused on every interaction the two of you have?

You keep busy through the morning by working on typing up your findings from yesterday. When you finally look up from the typewriter and stretch, you notice the time—one o’clock. Alex would be here any second to spend lunch with you—one of the last lunches you’ll have together down here. You sigh heavily as you think about it and guilt starts to settle back in when you realize you’ve kind of been counting down the hours till you drop him off at the airport to send him on his way.

It's just so you can be fully immersed in the work after he leaves. Nothing else. You’re just waiting for the reins to be taken off. For this “pending” stage to be over.

It’s beautiful outside today— the sun bright in a cloudless blue sky— so the two of you eat outside in the courtyard to take in the fresh air. As you sit and enjoy the lunch Alex packed for you, your mind drifts as he drones on about setting up the new place back home and trying to gauge your reactions on if you’d prefer the decor to lean more mid century or more contemporary. You can’t really bring yourself to care either way, as the thought of starting a life in this new place you’ve never even seen in person feels so far away that it’s unreal.

“Hey, are you here with me?” the question snaps you out of your head.

“Yeah, I’m sorry, it's just—”

“Are you feeling upset that I’m leaving in a couple days?” He asks and reaches across the table to hold your hand.

“Yeah. Yeah that must be it. I guess it still just…doesn’t really feel real you know? So far all of our life together has happened down here, so you not being here will feel…different,” you look up at him and take in his expression. You think you’re convincing enough. It's not that you don’t feel a bit sad he’s leaving, but everything else you’ve been fighting with emotionally since Javi returned has made things—complicated and you needed the space to work through it.

“Well, before you know it we’ll be back together. It might be hard for a little while, but I’ve come to accept it because this is what you wanted,” he rubs his thumb across your knuckles and you feel that sneaky guilt creep back up on you again.

It is what you wanted. But why did you really want it? You push the thought back down where it came from before it makes you face something you don’t feel ready or capable to take on yet.

“I guess you’re right—just know I am very thankful that you came around to it for me,” you smile softly and he returns one.

“Let’s not think about the sad parts for now. We at least still have tomorrow to have some fun at my going away party,” he leans over the table and plants a lingering, reassuring kiss to your lips.

“Right. One last chance for you to hold my hair while I’m bent over the toilet,” you joke.

“Just don’t let me get so fucked up I miss my flight the next morning,” he winks and you both rise from the table to head back into the building.

After lunch, you still haven’t heard anything from Javi and you’re starting to get concerned. You figure maybe you’d at least have a message notice when you got back to your desk, but there’s nothing. You’re starting to wonder if he was in trouble again—not in danger necessarily, but facing some kind of repercussions for something you weren’t privy to. You sneak into his office to look around and see if there’s any indication of where he went. Something written on a calendar, scribbled on a notepad—anything— but come up short. You decide to pick up the desk phone and dial the number to his satellite phone.

“Pick up, Javi. Please pick up,” all you get is a busy tone after every attempt.

What the fuck? Where did they take him?

When you plop back down at your desk, you run your fingers through your hair in frustration. Was this all about to fall apart? Were they sending him home again? You click your pen anxiously when a tap on your shoulder snaps you out of your thoughts. You turn your head to see Stoddard standing there with a phone.

“Sorry to disturb you, Miss, but uhh— Agent Feistl is on the phone for you,” he says as he extends it for you to take.

“Agent Feistl, hello. Is Peña down there with you? Have you heard from him at all?”

“No and no. I was actually hoping you knew something we didn’t,” he sighs.

“Unfortunately, I guess I don’t. I’ve been trying his sat phone all afternoon with no luck.”

“Fuck, same here. Last I talked to him was this morning and he was gonna hop on a plane to follow a lead in Panama, but he didn’t show.”

“Panama? What the fuck? Not showing when he says he will isn’t like him. Especially if shit could go sideways quickly,” the stress that has been thrumming under the surface all day is threatening to boil over as your mind runs through worst case scenarios. People are starting to leave the office for the night and now you find out the guys in Cali are in the same boat as you. “Let me know if you hear anything? I’m going to head home for the evening, but I’ll try to call him again later.”

“You got it,” he says before you hang up and hand the phone back to Stoddard.

Alex meets you by the front door of the Embassy to drive the two of you to his apartment for the night. When he hops into the driver's seat next to you, he turns to look at you, but you’re preoccupied, looking out the window and biting your nails.

“Hey, are you alright?” he asks as he starts the engine.

“Actually, not really,” you sigh.

“Wanna tell me what’s going on?” he turns out of the driveway towards his place.

You exhale hard before you look over at him with worry in your eyes—for Javi, but also in anticipation of how Alex will react once he realizes you’re this upset over something involving his new arch enemy again.

“It’s Javi…he’s been MIA all day except first thing this morning. I didn’t even get a chance to check in with him before he disappeared somewhere with a bunch of dudes I’ve never seen before and—”

“Wait, so he’s acting shady again?” he goes off.

“The fuck? No Alex, why would you say that? I just told you he’s basically missing and no one knows why or where he is. I talked to one of the agents down in Cali and he hadn’t heard from him either. His phone hasn’t even been reachable—”

“Okay, I’m sorry. Sorry,” he tries to backtrack.

“Yeah, okay. Please don’t make our last days together something we both don’t want to experience,” you shoot him a look.

You hop out of the car as soon as he pulls into the garage and parks and then you’re jogging to the living room to wait by the phone. Alex joins you shortly after and reluctantly sits on the couch for support, watching you pace back and forth.

“Would you at least come sit down?” he says frustratedly.

You stop pacing and just look at him defiantly at first, but then roll your eyes and give in. As you start to walk over to the couch, the phone rings and you immediately turn back around to grab it.

“Javi?” you say frantically.

“Hey,” he says softly before continuing “are you okay? Did something happen?”

“Did something happen? Are you serious, Javier? Where the fuck have you been? No one has heard from you all goddamn day and most of the night,” you spit.

Suddenly all the anxiety you felt this morning about your stupid fucking dream was nothing compared to the overwhelming relief you feel in hearing his voice again.

“Shit. I’m sorry. I uh—got taken for an unexpected ride to the middle of the fucking jungle to play hero for Stechner’s bullshit. Threw complete a wrench in chasing a lead. I tried calling the office and Feistl, but satellite phones don’t like to work in the jungle. Who the fuck knew?”

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding,” you reply.

“Yeah, my words exactly. Who knows how much this shit just set us back. How were things at the office today?”

“I didn’t get much further but hopefully now that you’ve escaped—actually what the fuck did they even have you down there for all day? Other than playing hero?”

“I’ll have to tell you when I see you. Not over the phone,” he sounds serious.

You sigh,“Okay.You should check in with Feistl and Van Ness too. They were trying you all day Stoddard said. Maybe they have something.”

“Yeah, you’re right I should. I will. I just—needed to call you first,” he says quietly.

You hesitate a bit before you say anything else. You know he knew you were probably on edge all day not knowing where he was. Now that you know he’s safe—and that he called you first—it brings up the feelings you’ve been able to stay distracted from after thinking he was in trouble all day. You start to feel some of the nervousness from this morning creep back up having him on one end through the phone and Alexander on the other watching you from the couch.

“Um—yeah. I—I’m just really glad you’re safe, Javi,” you breathe a sigh of relief. You can feel some of the heaviness lifting from both of you.

“ Yeah— me too, muñequita. Gonna go ahead and check in with the Cali team. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“See you tomorrow, Javi,” you wait until he hangs up first before placing your phone back in its cradle.

“Everything good?” Alexander speaks up.

“Um—yeah. Yeah I guess so.”

“You still sound worried, babe. Come sit down,” he pats the couch next to him and you oblige.

“Sorry, it was just—stressful today. Might take me a minute to come back to baseline,” you look over to him and he brings a hand up to brush your hair behind your ear.

“So what happened?” You can tell he’s asking just to appease you. Not because he truly cares about Javi.

“I’m not sure on all the details, but apparently he was brought on an impromptu visit to the fucking Amazon,” you say.

“Well, I guess the phone not working makes sense now,” he tries to lighten your mood.

“Guess so,” you fight a yawn, but it wins. “I’m gonna go shower and lay down. I’m exhausted,” you stand up from the couch and pet the top of Alex’s head before leaning down for a quick goodnight kiss.

After you wash the events of the day from your mind and body, you feel a little more relaxed as you curl up in bed. It doesn’t take long for you to drift off to sleep, your mind finally at ease.

………………………………………….

The next morning, you’re up before your alarm again but not because of dream-Javier Peña being balls deep in dream-you.

Thank fuck.

Today, you’re up early because Alex wanted to have one last breakfast with you before he has to leave tomorrow. The smell of freshly brewed coffee had floated through the apartment and hit your nose, pulling you from the dead.

You throw your legs over the side of the bed and stretch before standing to grab your robe. You sleepily tread your way to the kitchen where you find Alex happily chopping some fruit.

“Good morning,” you grumble.

“Good morning,” he turns to you and puts a piece of fresh pineapple in your mouth, “wow, look at you. You’re a vision,” he chuckles.

You catch a glimpse of your reflection in the kitchen window, half your hair plastered to your forehead, the other side sticking up in all directions.

“Shut up,” you respond, mouth full of the juicy fruit. You plop yourself into one of the chairs at the little bistro table where the two of you had spent so many weekend mornings together. “Shouldn’t I be making you breakfast? You’re the one leaving.”

“Maybe, but I didn’t wanna wake you just to demand breakfast. You looked so peaceful for once.”

For once, you think.

If only you could experience that kind of peace during your waking hours.

Alex brings two coffee mugs over to the table followed by the large plate he prepared full of an assortment of brightly colored fruits, breakfast meat and cheeses, and arepas. You feel a vague sadness wash over you when it hits you that you’ll actually miss this little tradition you have with him.

You thank him for preparing the spread and take a sip of coffee, savoring its warmth and toasted caramel and chocolate notes. Your favorite roast.

You glance out the window, the Bogotá streets just barely coming into view with the earliest light of the sun. You look back to Alexander and study his face, as if you’ll forget what he looks like in the months you’ll be apart. His dark bushy eyebrows and thick black mustache. The way his hair is a shade lighter from the way it soaks up the sun.

He looks up from his plate to meet your gaze and notices you taking him in, your eyes filled with a mix of melancholy and lingering sleep.

“What? What’s wrong?” he reaches a foot under the table towards yours to rub against it.

“Nothing,” you sigh, “just committing you to memory.” You take another sip of coffee.

“You don’t have to do that. It’s not like you won’t see me again. In fact, you’ll still see me later today,” he laughs.

You give him a pensive smile in return. He’s right you suppose, but something deep inside of you still urges you to take a mental snapshot of this time in your life here with him before everything changes.

After breakfast, the two of you spend the morning weaving in and out between each other silently as you get ready for the workday. You pack a change of clothes for after work when you go to the bar for Alex’s party. You don’t want to be too dressy since it’s just the same old bar you’ve frequented hundreds of times, so you settle on a black, long sleeved crushed velvet dress with a fine mesh window that gives just a peek at a sliver of skin across your abdomen. It’s sexy, but not too revealing. Plus, the fabric and sleeves were enough to keep you warm when it gets chilly later at night and the mesh—an appropriate sized vent for when it gets too stuffy in the bar.

You fold it up and place it in your bag along with a pair of strappy black sandals and follow Alexander out to the car so you can ride to the Embassy together.

This morning, he decides to walk to your desk with you and he cups your cheeks to give you a deep kiss before he heads upstairs to start his day. As he’s turning to go, he comments on the cup of coffee already waiting for you on the desk.

“Huh, lucky you. I’m gonna have to hit the cafeteria later for that dogwater they try to pass off as coffee,” he gives you one last peck before he makes his way to the stairs.

You look down at the cup, with the full knowledge of who your secret coffee fairy is and when you look up you see that the blinds on his office windows are open for once. You catch his eyes with yours and he quickly turns his back down to the papers in front of him.

You sigh affectionately to yourself.

Goddamnit, Javi.

This morning had already been emotional enough for you and now your thrown back into the feelings you had yesterday when you were internally panicking that something terrible had happened to him—a panic that only him being in trouble can stir in you. A panic that—if it were to become realized—would transform into an anger and grief that you’ve only experienced one other time before.

Suddenly you’re missing that sleep-induced peace Alex had mentioned earlier.

You look back up towards his office, admiring him as he sits there and works. Your mind is pulled back to your dream from the other day, except this time you’re not focused on the sex—you’re remembering the way his strong, steady arms held you and how full of adoration his deep brown eyes were when he looked at you. You feel your chest tighten and quietly tell yourself to snap the fuck out of it.

It wasn’t even real.

You take a deep breath and start towards his office. You needed to talk anyways so he can fill you in on whatever the fuck happened yesterday and so you can invite him to Alex’s going away party even though you know he likely won’t show. When you get to his door, you raise your hand to knock before it suddenly opens and he’s standing there. You jump back a little.

“Jesus, fuck! How are you always doing that, Peña?” you clutch your chest.

“To be fair, this time I saw you coming. Windows,” he gestures for you to enter.

He takes notice that you’re calling him Peña again, instead of Javi.

“So… how was the jungle, Tarzan? Did you find your Jane?” you say and you sit down in one of the chairs across from his desk, trying to play it cool. He narrows his eyes at you.

“Only if you’re counting Stechner as Jane,” he shoots back as he leans against his desk.

“What a god fuckin awful image,” you cringe and wrinkle your nose.

“You asked, muñequita,” he chuckles and pulls a cigarette from the pack in his jacket pocket.

“Jokes aside though, how was it? They really couldn’t have let you tell anyone what was going on before they took you all the way out there where you’d be unreachable?”

“I’m pretty sure it was all intentional. To keep me off Jurado’s trail. This shit with the Rodriguez brothers’ surrender—they really don’t want it getting fucked up…especially by me,” he exhales a puff of smoke.

“Shit—so what do we do now?” you stand up and start pacing in front of him.

A beat of anxious silence falls between you before he continues.

“Do you really wanna know?” he raises an eyebrow.

You stop directly in front of him, locking eyes. You see something mischievous glinting behind his that has your cheeks feeling hot.

“Fucking duh.”

“We’re gonna fucking do it anyway,” he responds, his voice low and defiant.

You giggle and that nervous feeling floods you again as you stand there under the intensity of his gaze. It had been a while since you worked with Peña-gone-rogue, but you’d follow him through anything and it lit some kind of fire in you that you’d missed.

“Fuckin�� A,” you smirk and playfully hit his chest with your palms.

“That’s my girl,” he gives you a lop-sided smile and combined with the nonchalant praise, you swear you stop breathing for a minute.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“Oh…um, also—before I forget—we’re having a going away party for Alex at the regular hangout if you want to stop by,” you blurt out and shift awkwardly.

“Yeah, I might stop by for a celebratory drink,” he scoffs and takes one last drag off his cigarette before he stubs it out in the ashtray behind him. “Are you okay, by the way? You seem uneasy.”

Why does he have to be so goddamn perceptive?

“Yeah, um. I think so? Just a lot on my mind, I guess,” you needed to get out of here.

He gives you a bit of a side eye before he says “hmm. If you say so.”

He definitely doesn’t believe you.

“I say so. I’m gonna go get to work, boss,” you don’t mean for it to come out as sultry as it does, but fine. If he was going to fluster you, you were going to fluster him right back. Try to throw him off how much you were overcompensating to hide the effect he has on you.

After you exit his office, you stand with your back flush against the other side of the door and take a deep breath before walking back to your desk. This day was just fucking chock full of emotional whiplash. You need to get it together.

You’re engaged, you’re ENGAGED. You love him. This morning with him was special. Javi is just your friend–that you also happen to love. There’s nothing wrong with innocently flirting with friends. Friends love each other. Friends also randomly have sex dreams about each other too, right? Close proximity or some shit.

You take a sip of the coffee Javi left you as if it will somehow save your nerves. You anxiously shake your foot back and forth before you decide you can’t take just sitting there anymore and get up to see what you can find in the file room.

You enter the tight, windowless space and pull the string that illuminates the single, naked lightbulb above your head. It casts a warm hue across the rows of shelves that hold boxes upon boxes of potential clues. You sigh and decide you’ll just spend the next couple of hours locked away in here, distracting yourself with your new mission.

You pull a box down to place on the floor and you kneel down as you pull the lid off. A flashlight sits on the bottom shelf next to you, so you flip it on and pull your legs to the side to make yourself comfortable as you start pouring through the files for anything interesting. Normally, you would’ve just brought the box into Javi’s office so you could work on it together, but not today.

You were already in enough trouble.

It’s only been about half an hour when you hear the door silently open and click shut. You see his silhouette come to stand over you, the dim lighting obscuring half of his face.

“Peña?” you squint your eyes as you try to make out the look on his face.

“You gonna actually tell me what’s going on with you or am I going to have to force it out of you?”

“I—what are you talking about? Nothing is going on. I’m…just in a weird mood with Alex leaving tomorrow and everything,” you look back to your file, trying to ignore the way your heart rate is increasing.

“So why are you hiding in here to work? If it’s about him? Don’t act like I don’t know what a fuckin bad liar you are.”

“I’m no—” you’re cut short.

“Stand up and look at me,” he orders in an authoritative tone he hasn’t used with you before and it shoots straight to your pussy unexpectedly. You feel your mind start to go blank as you slowly pull yourself up from the floor, your back pressed against one of the shelves.

He moves closer to stand in front of you and he looks down at you sternly. You avoid his gaze, trying to look anywhere else as if you could see shit else in here besides his overpowering presence.

“I said look at me,” he commands.

You slowly raise your eyes to his, looking up at him through your lashes. You feel exposed as he stares down at you—as if he can read every filthy thought you’ve ever had about him or every time you’ve wanted to tell him how you feel.

“Go on,” he rasps—his tone dripped in honey, luring you into letting your little secret free."You wanna tell me why you’re avoiding me?"

"Not really," you breathe out.

Why is he even so close to you right now? Your head is spinning, intoxicated by his scent and the heat radiating from his body. He’s not even fucking doing anything—not really. You’re just internally spiraling out of control. You bite your lip without even realizing and his eyes flick down to them slowly. When he looks back into your eyes, you see a familiar look.

You saw it that one night at the bar and again right before he kissed you in Medellín.

"Um—I—I had a dream about you Javi,” your breathing becomes faster as images from the dream return to the front of your mind.

He never drops his gaze from yours as he watches you struggle to get the words out. You know he already knows what kind of dream you mean, and he decides to toy with you instead of letting it go.

He brings a gentle hand up to cup your face and ghosts his thumb across your bottom lip, sending a shudder through your body. Your eyes threaten to flutter closed but you're so entranced by him you force yourself to keep them on his.

“Go ahead,” he coos “a dream about what, muñequita?” he flicks his eyes down to your lips again, watching as he continues to brush his thumb across them.

You can feel heat pooling in your belly, thinking about the way he fucked you in the dream—slow, intense—just the way you always imagined he’d do it when you fuck your fingers thinking about him. You feel your arousal starting to dampen your panties and you squeeze your legs together.

“Uhm it was —it was a sex dream Javi,” your voice barely above a whisper.

“Yeah?” He raises an eyebrow and you nod dumbly as he pulls your lower lip down with his thumb.

“You were having sex…with me?”

You nod.

“…In this dream?”

You nod again and he lets out a chuckle under his breath. He brings his other hand up and places it on the shelf next to your head, trapping you with his broad body.

“And then you woke up right?”

Nod.

“And what did you do when you woke up, hmm? Did you touch yourself?” his voice low and taunting.

Apparently all you can do is nod when you’re under his spell.

“Fuck,” he grits out, “show me.”

“Wha—what?” you gasp, your breath shaky.

“Show me how you touch yourself when you think about me… Please.” It’s almost pained, the way it leaves his lips.

You involuntarily whimper and start to move your mouth to suck his thumb between your lips while you snake a hand down to pull your skirt up—eyes still on his, both of you panting in anticipation when the door swings open, the harsh light from the office infiltrating your space.

The sudden intrusion has you quickly jumping away from each other. You drop down and pretend to look through the open box you have on the floor while Javi tells you to keep up the good work as he slips back through the rows of shelves and out the door.

You’re left scrambling to put the files back in the box and make the decision to just take it back to your desk. On your way out, you identify the intruder—Katie.

“Sorry, excuse me,” you say as you bump past her holding the box awkwardly. She squints her eyes and shoots you a suspicious look as you close the door to the file room on her.

Fuck. What was he thinking? What the fuck were YOU thinking? This was far too recklessly public with your fucking fiancé upstairs and a bunch of gossips swarming down here.

You place the box down on your desk before you decide you need to get the fuck out of the office for some air. You don’t even bother waiting for the elevator to take you down to the ground floor, you just book it down the stairs. When you get to the bottom floor, you fling the stairwell door open and inhale as much as your lungs will allow. You press your back against the wall of the building and tilt your head back to look up at the sky, trying to calm your breath as you still feel yourself throbbing and pulsing around nothing.

You curse yourself for not being able to reel in the way he sets you on fire. It’s not even a matter of your physical attraction to him—it's just all of him. The mutual respect, care, and fierce protectiveness you both have for each other. The way you just get each other without having to say a word. It all comes so easy—

—And that might be more dangerous than any work-related shit you get yourselves into. Maybe Alexander was right after all, but you can’t let him know that. You’re too stubborn to admit it to him and to yourself—you can’t have this be over before it even actually starts. You have to see it through. You’re not going to run again, you tell yourself over and over. You’re staying here to work. You had to keep the goal in mind and push anything else aside.

At least you think you’ll be safe tonight at Alex’s party. There was definitely no way Javi would show up now and the chances were already slim before. It’s definitely for the best because you can’t deny you may have had him in the back of your mind when you chose your dress.

You curse yourself again at the realization that maybe you’re just as much a part of the problem as him. You weren’t even consciously making these decisions, something else driving you completely—and you need to get it under control somehow. You take one last deep, calming breath before you walk back around to the front of the Embassy and take the elevator back up to the office.

You steel yourself as you sit back at your desk and start to sort out which files you’ve already looked at and had no luck with. You periodically see Javi going to and from the office, likely in and out of meetings for a couple of hours. After the last one, you freeze as you watch him approach your desk. He places both hands on it as he leans over, looking down at you. you feel your mouth go dry.

“I’m heading out to check out a lead,” he says lowly. You immediately start to stand from your chair, ready to go with him despite the way you are clearly not in full control of your mind.

“No…you stay here. Could be a while. Don’t want you to miss your future husband’s party,” he says as he pushes himself off your desk. You just watch blankly as he heads back to his office to grab his coat and keys and then he’s out the door. His words settle in on you after you watch him leave and you can’t help but notice it was maybe a bit of a jealous dig. You know him well enough to know that he does shit like this to guard himself.

You run. He builds massive walls—both insufferable in your own right. A perfect pair.

………………………………

You essentially throw your hands up for the rest of the day and head to the bathroom to start changing for the party. You figure you’ll head to the bar early and help set up. As you slip your dress on, you start to feel a lick of spite after he refused you going on a stakeout with him.

You should’ve picked a sluttier one—just in case he does show up.

As you start fixing up your makeup for a more sultry, nighttime look, your brain is still spiraling through a storm of conflicting emotions—hurt, want, a little anger—all the feelings that have a habit of setting you up for a night of questionable decisions.

At least now, you had Alex to keep you from running off with some stranger for the night, but you needed to let all the tension built up in you loose. As you paint your lips with a dark berry shade of lipstick, you rub them together to smooth it and then purse them at yourself in the mirror —pleased with your application.

“Ugh fuck it,” you mumble to yourself.

You’ve been at the bar helping the set up for an hour or so when the first guests start to trickle in—Alex and his coworkers. They yell “surprise!!” in unison as they walk through the door.

“I already know about the party, you dipshits,” Alex cackles. They all laugh and you crack a smile as you head over to greet him with a discreet kiss on the lips—careful not to smear your lipstick everywhere.

“Goddamn, look at you,” Alex rakes his eyes up and down your body shamelessly as he takes your hand and gives you a little twirl.

“Wanted to make sure you don’t forget me after tonight,” you smirk as he pulls you in to him.

“That could never happen, baby,” you giggle as he grabs a handful of an ass cheek.

The bartender cranks the music up a bit to get the party started, a mixture of cumbia, salsa, and some “gringo” music thrown in every now and then for this particular crowd. You order Alex and yourself a drink and walk over to the side of the bar where he’s chatting with his friends and hand it to him. He slips an arm around your waist while you listen to their conversation.

The bar starts filling out after an hour or so when everyone else has left work for the day. You see Katie and the other girls following her in along with some other agents from your floor. The drinks start flowing faster, the chatter gets louder, glasses clink, and you’re pleased with your work so far. Some small groups hit the dance floor and that’s when shit really gets going.

You’re deep in a lively conversation with Alex and his friends—a few drinks in at this point—as you act out stories for them from your not-so-distant previous life. They’re all captivated by your theatrics when you see him making his way through the crowd. He passes by your little group and nods to you and Alex—a polite, non assuming greeting—but tension returns to your body anyways. You had been so certain after the file room incident that he wouldn’t fucking show up you didn’t bother to take the extra time to think of a game plan if he did.

You let someone else take over the conversation as you watch Javi order a drink and make tortured small talk with someone he clearly finds extremely boring at the corner of the bar closest to you. You look around at the rest of the room, taking in the way the single girls dance and flirt across the floor—the way you used to do when you were the star of this bar. Alex’s body turns away from you as he makes conversation with someone else who walks up to him to say their goodbyes, so now you’re kind of left out of the circle. You lean back on your elbows against the bar and bring your drink up for a sip when you realize it’s mostly all ice now. You pout to yourself and turn to order another when you see Javi sliding a fresh one over to you.

You roll your eyes and reluctantly take it from him, turning your body to face him. The way he drags his eyes up your body doesn’t go unnoticed but you’re too busy pretending to be irritated to let him fluster you right now.

“Nice dress,” he murmurs.

“Thanks,” you say curtly as you turn your attention back towards the dance floor.

“It’s been a while since I’ve been in this place. It’s weird—seeing you in here on your best behavior,” he quips.

You think the same about him.

“The fuck is that supposed to mean, Peña?”

“Oh, we’re doing this again? The ‘Peña’ thing?”

He sees right through you every fucking time.

You turn your head to look at him, a certain weariness in your eyes, but you let him continue.

“I was just used to sitting here, watching you dance your way through the half the bar night after night to blow off steam. Always making sure some fucking asshole didn’t try to get too handsy with you,” he takes a subtle glance towards Alex and takes a sip from his glass.

You huff out an irritated chuckle, ready to throw something back at him when Alex turns back around.

“Heyyy!!! Javi, my man!! Get over here!”

Well, Alex is definitely on his way to being wasted you think. You see Javi’s eyes go wide and he throws the rest of his whiskey back as he slowly walks over to join the group. Alex throws an arm around him as if they’re old buddies and you watch in horrified amusement as you continue sipping your drink.

“I’m glad you came, man. Was wondering if you would. Wanted to make sure I could ask in person that you take care of her for me when I’m gone,” he brings his other hand to pat Javi’s chest.

Now you’re the one handing him a fresh drink.

“Uh yeah, man, sure. Of course I will,” he nods and brings his refilled glass up for a much needed gulp of alcohol. As much as you’re amused, you’re also practically shitting yourself over this cliche display of irony that you know you’re not innocent in.

“We were just talking earlier about some of the crazy shit she used to have to do. And now…I wanna hear directly from the man himself about how she was back in the day,” Alex looks at you adoringly and you bring your lips together in a tight awkward smile as you look between the two men. You settle your eyes on Javi as you wait in anxious anticipation for what he’s going to say. You feel yourself starting to sweat.

God, fuck this dress. Wrong choice.

“She was a force. Incredibly smart, quick-witted, just as eager to get as dirty as the guys—still is—and a deeply loyal friend and confidant. Congrats on locking her down, man,” he was really laying it on thick and he knew you’d hate that comment about being locked down—but you also know he meant every other word he’d said before that and you feel a smidge of your irritation with him melt away.

“Oh my god, Javier stop it,” you huff. “You boys talk amongst yourselves, I’ve gotta take a trip to the restroom,” you push yourself off the bar and you can feel Javi’s eyes following you—a desperate, unheard plea to not leave him here alone with your fucking fiancé.

You lock the bathroom door behind you and look at yourself in the mirror. At least on the outside you didn’t look like as much of a mess as you are on the inside. Alex’s request to Javi to keep you safe replays in your mind and you start to feel like a real piece of shit for not stopping this fucked up cat and mouse game that was going on with Javi behind his back. You stare your reflection down and drunkenly promise yourself from this night forward, shit will change. It has to change— for everyone involved and you’re the only one who can do it.

When you step back out into the dark hallway that leads back to the bar, you see Javi standing there against the wall—simultaneously hiding from the crowd and waiting for you.

“Well, this feels familiar,” you say as you slink your way over to stand in front of him. “Thanks for talking me up to that strange dude. What a great wingman you are,” you tease.

Javi stares at you quietly and intently. You shift nervously where you stand—in the same exact place you thought he was going to kiss you for the first time.

“I meant all of it, muñequita,” his eyes soften with all the other things he left unsaid.

“I know,” you whisper. You turn your head and look out towards the crowd, everyone intoxicated at this point, distracted by all the party shenanigans. You’re lost in your thoughts as the two of you stand there in the dark.

“Are you happy? Really?” he crosses his arms as you turn your attention back to him. You feel your own brows furrow and fight back waterworks with everything in you. You know it doesn’t matter what you respond with.

He already knows the answer.

Before you can speak, you hear drunken giggles making their way down the hall and Javi stands up a bit straighter as you shift your weight to your other foot.

“Oh my god, see, there he is!”

Katie again.

She really had a fucking knack for interrupting a moment between you two.

His face twists in confusion when he realizes they’ve been looking for him.

“Javi! Javi come dance with us,” she rushes over and starts pulling on his arm.

“I don’t really dance, sorry,” he tries to dig his heels in.

“Oh please, everybody dances when they’re drunk, Javi. Come on!” says another.

The commotion gets the attention of some of the party guests—including Alex—so you start to walk back out into the light of the bar as the gaggle drag Javi out to the dance floor against his will.

You rejoin Alex and his friends as they make conversation and you quietly sip your drink as you think about everything that happened between you and Javi today. You think about how Alex has no fucking idea—not really—despite his previous suspicions and you continue the internal self-flogging. You needed to get your mind off of everything bubbling up inside you, so you turn to order shots for you and the crew around Alex.

You grab two for yourself, snapping back into your best party host act as you lead the toast.

“Arriba! Abajo! Al centro! Pa’ dentro!” you all chant and clink the tiny glasses together as you throw one back followed by another.

“God, fuck,” Alex sputters “you took two back to back?”

“Mmm hmm,” you smirk and grab his arm as you pull him out to the floor now, a drunken boldness overcoming you.

You drag Alex close to where Katie has Javi trapped in a dance flanked by her friends. You make sly eye contact with him as you back yourself up into Alexander, his hands trailing down the sides of your body until his fingers grip your hips. You start to sway them and he trails his mouth down your neck as you reach a hand up to hold him there by the back of his head and then lean your head back against his shoulder.

The booze starts to settle into your bones as the music guides your movements more than your brain. You take the filth up a notch when you start to grind your ass against him and bend over. He leaves one hand on your hip, the other coming up to rest on your shoulder as he pulls you back harder against him. You grind yourself slowly against where you can feel him starting to get hard and smirk as you pick yourself back up, turning around in his grip to face him. He closes his eyes and brings his forehead down to yours as you continue rolling against him, making sure to keep eye contact with Javi standing behind Alex’s back.

Katie is mindlessly dancing up on him, but he stays focused on every move you make. You wanted him to get some kind of payback for the stunt he pulled in the office today—continuing the cat and mouse game you just promised yourself you’d stop. You bite your lip and then turn your attention back to Alex, pulling him down for a heated kiss, keeping your eyes locked on Javi while you lick into his mouth languidly. You watch as Javi’s brows furrow in frustration and you feel a surge of power along with the fleeting thought of what the fuck are you two even doing right now?

In turn, Javi pulls Katie by the hips further up his leg to dance closer and lets her do whatever she wants while he continues to watch you. You stare as Katie leaves slow kisses up the side of Javi’s neck before she tries to capture his lips–he stops her before she can by slinking his hand up under her hair and pulling her head back slightly. You pull Alex’s head down close again and suck on his lower lip before you moan into his mouth, the intensity of Javi’s gaze on every move you make sending your arousal higher and making you more bold.

You’re getting to a point where you’re not sure where to go from here without one of you completely fucking snapping when one of the guests trips and spills some of his drink down the back of Katie’s dress. Everyone stops to look as she gasps at the freezing cold feeling of the ice trapped in her bra and they all make space around where the drink dripped onto the floor, careful not to slip in it. Javi uses the distraction as his chance to escape and you watch as he disappears out the front door without so much as a single lookback.

Your body is still screaming and heated at whatever psychotic games of jealousy the two of you were playing when Alex asks

“Do you wanna get out of here?” while he kisses up your neck.

“Yes,” you say breathlessly.

Alex keeps his hand gripping your thigh during the ride back to his apartment. Your mind is swimming from the last couple of shots you took and the feeling of having Javi’s unwavering attention on you as you danced with someone else. You take Alex’s hand in yours and gasp as you slide it up and pull it under your dress. He groans when he feels how wet you already are.

“Gonna make me wreck this fucking car, baby. Jesus,” he pants.

He just about doesn’t even think to turn the car off as he parks and before you know it, you’re fumbling to get inside the apartment through the garage door in the dark. He pushes your back against the door as he fishes to get the keys in, nearly dropping them when you bring your hand down to cup his cock through his jeans.

You giggle to yourself at his struggle. Once the lock pops open, he pushes you backwards inside, then guides your back to press up against the living room wall, his lips never leaving your skin. You tangle your fingers in his hair, as visions of Javi trapping you in the file room flash behind your eyelids and you moan.

“You’re fucking evil, woman. What’s gotten into you?” Alex growls against the sensitive skin of your neck as he grips a fist full of hair.

You whimper and wish it was Javi as Alex crashes his lips against yours.

“Wanted to give you a good send off, baby,” you pant against his lips as you start unbuckling his belt.

“Oh my god,” he groans as you pull him from his boxers.

He grabs the hem of your dress and yanks it up your hips. You quickly pull your lacy white thong down your legs and step out of it before he hitches one of your legs around his waist and tilts your pelvis towards his leaking cock. You whimper and squeeze your eyes shut as he starts to press the head through your folds. You both groan when he bottoms out. You grasp the back of his head and twist your fingers in his hair as he buries his face between your shoulder and neck, thrusting up into you at a desperate pace. You lean your head back against the wall and bite your lip, eyes squeezing shut again as your mind starts to play out what you didn’t get to finish in the file room this afternoon.

You’re looking up at Javi through your lashes as you snake your hand down between your legs, feeling your slick drench your fingers, watching the way his jaw clenches and his eyes darken with lust as he tries to hold himself together.

“Fuck!” you cry out.

“Yeah? You fucking like that, don’t you?” Alex pants against your skin.

Javi brings a hand down and cups it over yours as you slowly slide your fingers in and out of your pussy, his forehead leaning against yours as he watches the languid pace you fuck yourself on your fingers for him.

“Ohhh,” you gasp, “please, please,” a desperate plea falling from your lips and into the wrong ears.

“Almost there baby, almost there,” his strokes are getting sloppier.

Your eyes fall to his lips and the way they’re so close to yours it drives you insane. He reads your want and cups your face with his other hand, bringing you in for an all-consuming kiss while you continue pumping your fingers in and out, slowly brushing them against that sensitive spot in your walls. You bring your other hand forward and cup it against the front of Javi’s pants and he growls needily into your mouth when you squeeze.

“Fuck…fuck yes,” you clench around Alex’s cock, your mouth falling open in a silent cry as you pull his hair tighter, climbing higher towards your release—your fucked up fantasy spurring you on.

“Yeah…fuck yeah I’m gonna come, babe”

“Fuck,” you barely squeak out as you send yourself over, whimpering and biting down hard on your lip as you do, careful not to let Javi’s name at the tip of your tongue slip from your mouth.

Alex comes with a groan and a shudder, grabbing your face to pull to his as he kisses you through the aftershocks. He unhooks your leg from around his body and you slowly let your foot drop back to the floor.

“Goddamn,” he pants and pulls you in for another kiss. You sigh against his lips, sleepily satisfied.

“Oh shit,” you gasp suddenly. You feel his spend start to drip down the inside of your legs and you laugh as you escape his arms and jog toward the bathroom.

After you clean up and go to wash your hands, you look at yourself in the mirror again—

This time you did look like a direct reflection of the mess warring inside of you.

Your lipstick is mostly gone or smeared down your chin and your mascara is smudged under your eyes and down your cheeks in some spots. Your hair is sex-tousled and sweaty.

Reality starts to settle back in as the effects of the alcohol start to evaporate from your body along with the intense arousal you had coursing through you all day.

You turn your back towards the sink and slowly bring yourself to sit on the floor, a hand coming up to rest on your forehead. You close your eyes and you swear you can already feel a headache starting behind them.

You’re startled when you hear Alex knock on the door asking if you’re okay.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Just got the spins,” you call from the other side of the door.

“Okay, I’ll set some water and ibuprofen out for you on the nightstand,” he assures.

“Thank you,” you don’t even know if he hears it as you fight back tears.

Fuck.

This was gonna get messy.

Thank you for reading if you made it this far! Likes, comments, rb's whatevs are always appreciated 💖

Tags: @ak-vintage @shchristine @80ssong @missladym1981 @vie-is-punk @wethairjoel @javierpenaispunk @wildemaven @indiegirlunited @syd-djarin @cuntyhunty22 @ohhoneypascal @educated-zombie @kilamonster @hotforpedro

#narcos fanfiction #javier peña fanfiction

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keylimebeag · 15 days ago

Text

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 ⋆˙⟡

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩: joel wants to work on his latest wooden craft; but sitting across from him for so long…you want something else.

𝐟𝐭. (old man)jackson!joel x fem!reader

𝐰𝐜: 2k(ish)

𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐬: 18+, mdni, straight smut, established relationship, undisclosed age gap (joel is 55-60 yrs old), oral (m receiving), deep-throat, f!reader touching themselves, joel’s a lil mean/bratty, joel’s BIG too, coming inside reader’s mouth, dirty talk, mention of the lil blue pill at the end.

𝐚/𝐧: yeah…this was supposed to be a hehe haha lil one paragraph thought and umm…yeah. joel is infectious…enjoy! :3

“darlin’” joel drawls softly; warm and gentle like an afternoon sun in the summer. it was nothin’ but a sweet, southern warning as the weight of your foot presses into his thigh.

he had been working on some wood carving for what felt like hours, with no end in sight. he said it was important and that he wanted to finish it tonight…but you had other plans. sitting across from him at his kitchen table, flipping through some book that you dragged out of his shelves. boredom has your eyelids feeling like they weight a hundred pounds and you’re pretty sure you’ve read the same page more than four times.

which is where you get the wonderful idea to have a little fun of your own.

you scoot down a little in your chair— just enough to not be suspicious right off the bat— until you lift your foot to press gently into his knees. nothing unusual, something relatively normal to be honest. as any other day, joel would gently grab hold of your calf and stroke along your skin. you wait a heartbeat, flipping through the book as if you’re still reading it, before your foot advances.

the first warning.

you bite down on your bottom lip at his southern drawl but he doesn’t look at you— just continues to work on his little carving tangled up in his fingers. you watch for a moment as his knife smoothes over an edge, the wood that curls up underneath the blade and falls onto the table. you wait for the fourth or maybe fifth skim of his knife and the fall of discarded shavings before you begin to move again.

no longer as teasing as you probably should be; you shift your foot right in between his thighs. pressing just enough weight onto his softness to liven him up a little and not to hurt him.

joel grunts under his breath and he slightly jerks as you press your foot into his jeans and his cock beneath— a good start.

with that you finally draw his eyes away from his carving. his glasses settle onto the edge of his nose and he glances at you from over the rim; the second warning. but all it does is make your heart flutter. you smile all innocent like, shrugging your shoulders under his heavy gaze before his attention returns to the wood carving in his hands.

clearly, just teasing him would not be enough to get him to put away what he was working on and instead ‘work’ on you; so you’d just have to push your luck a little more.

you place the book faced down before slowly slipping out of your chair; sinking right down onto your knees and under the kitchen table. you replace your previous advances with your hands now, skimming the palms of your hands along his inner thighs as you move between his parted legs. your fingers are just grasping around the metal of his belt buckle when he’s noticed exactly what you’re up to.

you hear him halt in his work by the tap of his knife being set down on the table, and then he’s scooting back in his chair a little. where he can look down at you and your position from beneath the table, his gaze a warm summer’s heat that lights your whole body on fire. joel sighs an old man sigh, a lifted eyebrow pointed down in your direction as the only words he says.

you shrug once more, dawning a not-so-innocent smile as your fingers continue to work at his belt. “m’not doin’ nothin’” you coo up at him, putting on your best southern accent to mirror his own. a little tilt to your lips as you stare up at him from your little sweet spot between his thighs. “you can still work, right?” you hum ever so sweetly, slipping the leather end of his belt out of the buckle. and just because he’s watching; you put on a good little show for him. you lean forward, pressing a kiss into the waistband of his jeans, before your lips wrap around the button of his jeans. you unbutton the front of his pants before taking his zipper in between your teeth and slowly pulling it down as well.

the twitch in the corner of his eye lets you know exactly how well your little show is working on him. along with the twitch beneath his boxers. but he restrains himself nonetheless and lets you play out your little plan.

once the fly of his pants is positioned opened wide, you hover over the half-stiffness inside his boxers. letting out a hot breath right along the growing tent inside his underwear. you chuckle at the twitch your breath gains you before you occupy your mouth with something else entirely. your lips press into the curve of his half hard cock before your entire mouth is warming across his boxers. you leave open mouth kisses along every inch of his shaft, fingers working circles into his jean clothed thighs.

you can hear him choke back a deep groan that buzzes inside his chest. makes your head fuzzy hearing him try his best not to enjoy what he’s seeing and feeling. makes you want to ruin him just a little bit more.

“go on old man,” you mumble teasingly against his shaft, your fingers working upwards to hook around his boxers waistband and giving them a tug; just enough that one of your hands can fish him out from beneath the fabric of his underwear. now he’s entirely hard, standing at the ready and drooling at the tip like a young man would. you press a kiss into the leaking slit of his tip as a smile forms on your lips once more. “finish your carving…”

you barely glimpse his lips curl as he tries to respond to your little teasing but you don’t let him. your mouth surges forward, fully wrapping around the head of his stiff cock— effortlessly cutting him off from speaking. another deep groan from within his chest has your toes curling.

you’re slow in your movement to take more of him into your mouth. keeping a steady hand on his base as you slowly sink onto him, teasing him just a little more. he was used to the fast paced, ‘need to hurry before patrol’ bj’s you usually gave him in the early hours of morning. but on the other hand…you’re a little surprised as the more you swallow him, the more his hands stay above the table. normally, those calloused, strong hands of his would be tangled up into your hair; pulling your locks as filthy praise tumbled from his tongue— but not this time. no, this time, joel was going to let you work all on your own. it was punishment. since he knew how much you liked to hear him tell you how fucking pretty you looked sucking him off.

whatever. if the older man wanted to be just a little meaner this time…fine by you, you’ll just have to work a little harder than usual.

at that thought, you suck around him a little harsher. using your own free hand to tuck strands of fallen hair behind your ears to keep them out of the way. sliding further and further down until you can’t take anymore of his shaft; swallowing him completely to the hilt. he sits so comfortably inside your mouth and throat, as if you were made to hold him there, but neither of you get to enjoy the satisfaction for too long as you slowly slip him back out of your mouth with a wet pop.

you smirk up at him and his heavy gaze. dark eyes, pupils blown wide from the lust seeping through his rough exterior. watching as his breath quickens inside his lungs to make his chest rise and fall in rapid succession.

oh hook, line, and sinker. he was all yours now— carving be damned.

you press another kiss into the slit of his leaking head, giggling at the way his eyelashes flutter, before slowly shifting your hand up to meet your lips. you stroke him entirely. from base to the tip, dribbling his precum onto the plump of your bottom lip. any other night and joel would’ve called you every pet name under the sun, with almost every ounce of praise he could fling at ya. but tonight he just bites the inside of his cheek, demanding you to continue with just that dangerous glint to his eyes. as if he’s waitin’ for the right time to strike and turn you into a babbling mess.

that would come sooner or later though— you still had some teasin’ to do.

you slide your hand faster over his shaft. jerking him with a steady pace until your mouth yearned to return to him. so with a little help of some of your spit slicked onto your hand and thus onto his shaft; your lips return to wrapping around his tip. thanks to the added little bit of slick and his smeared precum, you’re able to move faster across his large cock. bobbing your head faster and faster with only a soft gag here and there from the thick of his head damn near hitting the back of your throat.

if you hadn’t done this before, you’re sure you’d be choking and gagging way more than you were now…like the very first time the two of you slept together. definitely was a little bit of a shock at how massive he was.

“you fuckin’ dazin’ off?” joel’s gruff voice coos from above.. embarrassment flushes your cheeks a royal red as his words sink in; realizing you might have accidentally let your mind wander away from the task at hand. “y’started this…gotta finish it now, darlin’” joel hums, the pet name rolling off his tongue oh-so-sweetly, as he finally, finally, sinks a few of his fingers into the top of your hair. but he grips harsher than usual, sending a little shiver of pain down your spine. but it’s a more than welcoming little sensation; causes your eyes to flutter and hearts dance across your gaze as you look up at him.

but it’s him yanking on your hair, forcing you to take all of his aching cock into the entirety of your mouth that sends an electric shock straight to your womb. your pussy throbs, slick flooding from between your slit and throughly soaking the panties you wear. you moan, light and whiney, around his base; your nose is pressed into his tan lower abdomen. and he holds you there, with just one big hand of his, forcing your lungs to go into overtime to keep you breathing.

immediately your hand shoots down between your thighs, where you press fingers into your drenched panties, slipping the pads of your fingertips right along the entire curve of your cunt. you whimper at the first touch of your fingers, forcing your gaze up to his as you rub against your clit with a shudder.

joel chuckles, deep and low, and directly at you as he watches you touch yourself. “that fuckin’ needy sweetheart?” joel hums in response to your pathetic moan; sending shivers up his entire body as well. he doesn’t let you answer though as his fingers untangle from your hair, returning to their original position above the table. a nod of his head is the only other thing he ‘says’, instructing you to continue your work.

and you do as your told. drawing your mouth back to his tip, catching your breath, before swallowing him whole once again. the deep burning need inside your tummy turns you messy. spit dribbles down your chin with each bob of your head. and with each press of your fingers against your core, you flood into your ruined panties.

and while joel doesn’t touch you, his mouth sure does run. your name sinks off his tongue every time you edge closer to his tip; every curse known to man taking over when you sink down onto the base of his cock. and you know he’s getting closer and closer to the burning of his own orgasm when he starts to string just a little bit of praise together.

“fuck,” he huffs, watching his thighs clench hard at either side of your head. “couldn’t wait, huh? only got one thing on that pretty lil mind of yours, yeah? fuck.” he groans deeply, fingers gripping the edge of the table to keep himself from giving you the satisfaction of, well, him losing his internal battle. “yer’mouths so hot, so warm. you were made to take me, ya know.”

his words make you weep around him but his twitching cock forces you to swallow a pathetic whimper. his dirty talk spurs you on, faster and faster, until he can’t take anymore. the primal groans and grunts that leaves his lips and the way he swells inside your mouth gives you all the clues you need. you hum around him once, twice, drawing out a few more of his deep breathy moans, timing it just perfectly before you sink him into the back of your throat.

his hips jerks erratically as he cums deep into the warmth of your mouth. you hum satisfactorily at the broken syllables of your name as you rides his orgasm out. when he finally finishes, you slowly pop off his softening, spent cock, getting a good look at your man; his pupils blown wide, chest heaving with every breath he tries to catch, sweat beading his forehead, and those sexy ass reading glasses of his are disheveled and lopsided. god it makes you want him so badly…more so than before.

“you better take one of your pills, old man,” you tease with a dripping lustful tongue, climbing up from beneath the table and into his lap, straddling his hips. “i’m not done with you yet.” you muse, taking up one of his large hands and pressing the tips of his calloused fingers into your drenched panties.

joel doesn’t have to say anything— the dark twinkle to his eyes says enough. you were in for a wonderfully long night.

#joel miller #joel miller fanfiction

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