knivesandcoffee - Tumblr blog

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Diego Hargreeves “Number 2″ - The Umbrella Academy

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younger five: *after shouting at young Diego for reminding young Vanya that she is ordinary* You can pack your things and leave, there's the door

young vanya: *from behind him* There's the door bitch!

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Diego: Bro what's your body count?

Five: Oh me? dang like 30 now

Ben: Oh my god Five!

Five: wh-what? wait are we talking about people we slept with?

Ben: Y-yeah

Five: Oh well I haven't done that yet

Diego: Then why'd you say 30

Five:..

Diego: DUDE WHAT DOES 30 MEAN?!

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David Castañeda in The Umbrella Academy season 2 (2020)

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Did... did David Castañeda photoshop this himself??

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Ben: Welcome to dating advice with Ben!

Ben: Luther what's your question?

Luther: how do i know if a girl likes me?

Ben: she doesn't, next question

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elliot page and emmy raver-lampman on set of the umbrella academy (season three)

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klaus + being worried about allison

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Ben: [trying to help Klaus] what do we say when life disappoints us?

Klaus: Called It!

Ban: kalus, no.

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Vanya: i hate all men

Allison: but when-

Vanya: i hate all men.

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Sorry to stop your scrolling, but just a small reminder to go tell your sibling and/or parents that you love them. They can be going through some shit. And if you are going through shit then a reminder from me that you are strong and you can do it, you are not alone and there are people who care about you. Thank you for taking time out of your day to read this, and re-blog if you can.

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Diego: it’s gonna be o...

Grace: Remember what we worked on, just picture the word in your mind.

Diego: It’s gonna be o-ok....m-mom

me asf:

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reblog if your name isn't Amanda.

2,121,566 people are not Amanda and counting!

We’ll find you Amanda.

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Allison: ok thats my brother who’s been to the moon and thats my brother who’s been to the apocalypse - no he’s not actually 13 he’s in his 50s- okay and you know Klaus he’s a cult leader and he can see my other brother Ben who’s a ghost oh and that’s diego he likes knives

Raymond:

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Reginald: Hey would you guys be there for me if I was going through something?

Diego: No.

Allison: Nope.

Luther: Absolutely not.

Five: I hope it sucks whatever you’re going through.

Ben: I hope it sucks *laughing* what the fuck.

Klaus: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.

Vanya: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you.

Hargreeves: *All laughing*

Grace: I can’t wait to go to your funeral knowing I could’ve changed that outcome

Hargreeves: *Laughing profusely*

Pogo: Oh damn. Shit got real, REAL QUICK.

Reginald: I was just asking if you’d be there for me…