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I know that the nitpicking over why the Fellowship didn’t just ride the eagles to fly directly to Mordor has been talked to death, there’s more than enough answers. The Doylist answer is that would stop the whole book from existing, or replace it with a wholly different book all about eagles. The Watsonian answer is that a) the eagles are a noble independent people not a taxi service, b) the quest is a stealth mission and huge massive giant eagles are not stealthy, c) Mordor has air supremacy and the eagles could only fly to Mount Doom after Sauron was defeated and the Nazguls all gone.

But just now, option d) occurred to me: do we really trust the eagles to withstand the ring? If it tempts Gandalf and Galadriel, surely it tempts Gwaihir the Windlord. Do we want to create the Dread Lord of the Skies? He would wear the Ring on his lovely sharp claw! He would fly higher and swifter than the winds of the world! He would build a magnificent nest from the broken timbers of Edoras! He would eat so many people! All elves and men would be forced underground!

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YOU THERE

HALT !!!

sniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniffsniff

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"you see a man in a white lab coat, next to him you see yourself on all fours, jumping for treats. when you try to move you find an extra appendage and when you speak only a bark comes out. this man has put your brain in a dog and a dog's brain your body."

"You're Finally Awake" game jam, everyone makes RPG modules that all start with the player characters waking up to the sound of someone saying "Hey, you. You're Finally Awake."

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every reimu scenario ever 

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Democracy dies in darkness is the Washington Post’s mission statement.

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Me: so they’re probably going to do a ce with Charlemagne and Roland since they’re both new and it would make sense to just have them together-

Fgo:

Me: o oh

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RAT GALA

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it's because you don't command the mind with the body.

The mind commands the body and it obeys. The mind commands itself and meets resistance.

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couldn't be me.

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oh they don't even open them. the algorithm sends it to trash immediately

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i honestly don't know how i would live if i were allergic to peanuts. is that life even worth living?