krispynerdfire

[krispynerdfire]

Rant

I hate how in fanon they just dumb down almost all the characters except one or two and make another one a literal angel who can do no wrong because in canon the thing it's based on the characters are way smarter like one of the fandoms I'm in they're all geniuses but in fanon only 2 of them are smart. Like stop removing Character traits from other characters to give to another character cause you don't like the character traits that character has it's like taking something that's equal and making it unequal because you didn't like how it was already.

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So Bruce now has several adult children that could very easily take up the cowl (and already have in some cases) but he doesn't seem to be retiring any time soon. So let's say he gets injured in the field, like Bane back-breaking stuff, and he is forced to retire. He wants one of his kids to take up the mantle. Not necessarily pretending to be him, but as the new Batman (like Terry McGinnus in Batman Beyond).

Issue is he doesn't know who the cowl should go to, so he calls a meeting. Everyone is sitting at a long table in the manor when Bruce discusses his sudden, but overdue, retirement.

Bruce: So now we come to the splitting of assets.

He places the cowl on the table in front of him.

Bruce: Figure it out yourself.

He gets up and leaves.

Expecting a fight to break out, he waits to listen at the door in case things get out of hand, lord knows he doesn't want a physical brawl over the cowl. He doesn't expect what happens next.

*silence*

Stephanie: Not it!

Tim: No way!

Dick: Been there, done that.

Damian: No.

Cass: no.

Babs: Already got a job.

Duke: Uh, I think I'm busy that day.

The only person who hasn't said anything is Jason

Dick: Looks like it's you Jay.

Jason: Fuck no, I figured killing people made me exempt already.

Bruce happily sheds a tear, knowing his raised his kids so that none of them want to follow in his footsteps.

After an all nighter where the kids argue over who should take the role

(notable points include:

Tim: I thought you were the 'Blood Son's Dames, it's your 'birthright' and all.

Damian: I plan to donate blood tomorrow.

Jason: Dick, you're the oldest, you take it.

Dick: No! Have you seen how good my ass looks in my current suit? A cape is gonna ruin that silhouette!

Stephanie: Why don't you want it Tim, you're already CEO of WE, why not become full Bruce?

Tim: *shudders* Ra's already is obsessed with me, if I become Batman, he won't leave me the fuck alone.

Eventually they call Bruce back in, having come to a decision. Bruce walks in, not sure who has taken it, but his bets are on either Cass, Dick or Damian. He looks up at the table to see:

Sitting at the head of the table, with the cowl over their face...

Bruce: Um... Alfred?

Dick: Yeah! He has the most experience out of all of us!

Duke: This also means we can keep doing our own things as well.

Jason can't stop laughing at Bruce's face.

Bruce: You're really playing along with this Alfred?

Alfred: I am the night Master Bruce.

Bruce: Real fun-

Alfred: I think you'll find that I am vengeance sir.

Bruce: Okay, I ge-

Alfred: I, young Master, Am Batman.

Bruce phones Kate who laughs in his face.

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i think it would be funnier if instead of hating Tim when he got to the manor, Damian just decided he didn’t want to give the guy the time of day.

Tim: hey! I’m Tim, it’s nice to meet you-

Damian, in perfect english: sorry I only speak arabic. *walks away*

Tim:

-

Tim: I don’t think he likes me.

Dick: what?! course he does!

Tim: watch this.

Tim, calling over to Damian: Damian!

Damian: *ignoring him*

Tim: Dami!

Tim: Damian it’s really important!

Tim: I have a gift for you!

Tim:

Tim, dryly: Damian Jason called and he wants to talk to you.

Damian, turning round instantly: what does Todd need?

Tim: see.

Dick:

-

Tim: B you have to stop pairing me and Robin up for patrol.

Bruce: why?

Tim: because last time we were together he took my grapple and tried to loose me in public transport.

Bruce:

Tim: worst part was when i called Steph to pick me up she just said ‘rich kid issues; try slumming it on the trains with the rest of us’ and hung up.

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was talking to @wickedsmille about Damian and Tim being locked in a room while dosed with truth serum and bonding over their traumatic childhood training so have this:

"Batman broke my collarbone during one of my first training sessions."

Damian sucks in a sharp breath. His head swings around but Tim isn't looking at him; he's staring off into the distance with a strange look on his face.

"He never wanted another Robin but he was going to kill himself otherwise. He must've thought it would scare me off but I showed up the next day anyways. So he made me run on a treadmill until I puked."

Oh. That look, Damian realizes, is resignation.

"Why are you telling me this?"

Tim shrugs. "I just thought that you should know that--that you're not alone. Bruce is hard on everyone."

If one of his teachers had broken his bones, his mother would have slit their throats. It was too great a risk to his development and too far a step.

"Richard and Todd have never said anything about father injuring them during training."

Tim smiles, small and humorless. "No, they wouldn't. They trained with Bruce Wayne. I trained with Batman."

[krispynerdfire]

“If Damian got bullied at school he’d hit someone” psh boring this boy was raised by Talia motherfucking Al ghul that woman invented gatekeep gaslight girl boss and she taught Damian everything he knows

Damian wouldn’t hit them he would destroy them he is the youngest Wayne and use’s that to his advantage

I’m talking big fat crocodile tears while completely twisting the story to put In his favor that boy walked in to a locker so he could say that Wallace cooper punched him

“I swear miss’s Rooney I didn’t do anything I just told him I liked his shoes”

Before going home and acting like nothing happened until Bruce gets a call about how they want to have Wallace apologize to Damian for the bullying and Bruce has no idea what the secretary was talking about when Bruce asks Damian all Bruce gets from him is “I have it handled” and refuses to speak about it anymore

Damian is both an Al ghul and a Wayne that boy would be pulling strings so well nobody would know he was the puppeteer 

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People need to stop bringing in Jason and Tim into every conversation about the al ghuls like what are you talking about bro where did those two even come from. They have like, one story in which they’re relevant.

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me whenever I see posts about how canon is shit and can be discarded

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as a hater, it's important to keep in mind that true fandom is a long game. for example, yeah, it's fucking annoying when you genuinely enjoy a show or something for multiple reasons and it happens to have gay people (or people who could be read as gay) in it and so the fandom gets flooded with the kind of fans who are literally just here for the "Hot New Thing to Slash Ship" and therefore have bad opinions on everything because they think entirely in shallow fanfic tropes and are going to get mad every time something doesn't line up perfectly with their fanfics, but with time they will move on to the next "Hot New Thing to Slash Ship," and you'll realize your real enemy is and has always been That One Blogger who Sincerely Loves this Show as Much as You But Has the Worst Fucking Opinions on Planet Earth.

[krispynerdfire]

*at the Wayne’s for a BBQ*

Jon, pointing at Jason’s chest as he gets out of the pool: woah, how did you get THAT one?

Jason, looking down at his autopsy scar:

Jason: *makes eye contact with Clark behind Jon*

Jason: uh.

Jason: that happened because when I was a kid I refused to go to bed when my dad told me to.

Jon: *gasp*

Jason: yeah… I should have listened. if you stay up too late the… I dunno. the bedtime monster. yeah. if you don’t listen then the bedtime monster attacks you for not sleeping and you get one of these.

Jon, whispering: I had no idea…

Jon, solemnly: thank you for warning me.

Jason: anytime.

Damian, watching Clark slip Jason ten dollars from the other side of the pool: by god, my friend is an idiot.

[krispynerdfire]

You can spam boop me!

reblog if you let people spam boop you

[krispynerdfire]

I believe the dynamic was better with Keith because the show allows us to see the close relationships among all the paladins and their siblings. However, throughout the series, Keith and Shiro's relationship felt more like that of a mentor and mentee, even though they were supposed to be somewhat like brothers. I think that particular scene was meant to highlight the strength of their brotherly bond.

Keith being able to reach the spiritual field or whatever it's called should have been something for Lance. I am so tired.

I love Keith, don't get me wrong. But my god the amount of favoritism Keith got by the writers showed.

Lance deserves better.

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Technically he's 37.5% Arab cause his mom is 75% Arab and 25% Chinese. So he's 25% Jewish and White, 37.5% Arab and 12.5% Chinese. Not to be rude or anything

please drawn Damian Wayne with middle eastern features.

He is in fact, half Arabic. That's fucking important

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I thought he was engaged to selina

So I asked my mom why she hates Batman

Mom: He's ugly, first of all. Secondly Clark is a family man-

Me: Clark has 1, maybe 2 kids at best. Bruce has 6-7! You love kids!

Mom: How many wifes does he have?

Me:.... None.

Mom: See! Even the woman of Gotham don't want him.

😭😭😭 What was I supposed to say to that??!

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I would read this

i need the batfam fandom to give damian the same energy we give tom hollands peter parker in fics like

i want Field Trip to Wayne Enterprises fics

fics where damian gets phone calls from his famous siblings in class

fics where damian has to deal with the other kids watching thirst traps of his older siblings

fics where he’s getting bullies and one of them shows up in full vigilante attire to scare the middle school bully

just

damian al ghul wayne fanfic that centers around his school life and protective family

[krispynerdfire]

thank @fluffyspaceball for tagging me

cool umm...I have the same hyperfixations until I get bored of it

@bart-allens-boyfriends @ladytig3r @ostentums@cookeybg @ghostlyhana

Hey yall my ass just had an idea

So i wanted to do a do a thing w my mutuals where everyone says a fun fact about themselves. So I’ll go first.

I thought senpai from Friday night funkin was hot 💀

@tinyy-tea-cup @miss-seanymph-pani @heldril @snowmantita @monstertreden @vilereign @nicasdreamer @bromeliae @brokensenseofhumor

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If you see this on your dashboard, reblog this, NO MATTER WHAT and all your dreams and wishes will come true.

[krispynerdfire]

ok so damian is 14, Tim is 22 , Jason is 24 and dick is 30

what are your guys thoughts on batboys ages?