kru-sader

[kru-sader]

I leave my home to start my journey to college tonight. Of all the things I'm reluctantly leaving behind, I'm scared I will miss this the most.

(Mother)

waleda,ammi,maa,mummy,anne

Laying in her lap while she slowly runs her fingers through my hair fixes everything.

[kru-sader]

Slay. Slay your enemies.

[kru-sader]

Slay. Slay your enemies.

[kru-sader]

Finished Rule of Wolves a few ago - essentially completing the Grishaverse series more than an year after I had completed the first five books. I was avoiding starting King Of Scars for the sole reason that I found out Zoya- whom I admit I disliked greatly- was going to be more of a main character and Nikolai's love interest in this duology.

Although the duology did do a good job in redeeming her for me, I still have several complaints about her character arc.

Firstly, the sad backstory was definitely- sad; however it in no way logically explains Zoya's vile behaviour towards Alina in SAB. The only way Leigh Bardugo could have clarified all of that, her superiority complex and her mean gurl persona in general was to let her be the arrogant and self-centered girl she was painted out to be initially. She could have owned that and I personally would have loved her still. Does she go around treating Otkazat'sya with hostility? Yes. Would she still put her life on the line to save theirs? Also yes. Does she look down on pretty much anyone and everyone she meets? Yes. Does that affect how she does her duties as the General? No. Does she grumble and complain about something all the time? Yes. But does she also work incomparably hard to somehow put life into a dying nation? Yes.

I have no qualms about her backstory. It was fine. It gave us a peek into where Zoya came from, what she's suffered and all that she risks losing if she fails. But I cannot for the life of me find the link between all that and her actions in SAB. The author could have just let her be a snarky little shit while showcasing all that she does for her country and people rather than force her into the super annoying mold of the soft and sensitive saintly girl who's so traumatised she's adopted this tough girl persona who cares about no one. It feels ingenuine, like even in her own monologues Zoya is acting to get the readers to sympathise with her.

Another thing that infuriated me to no end about her character was how inconsistent it was :|

In chapter 5 Zoya clearly says to Count Kirigan ,

"You will invite me to a fine dinner. We'll both drink too much wine. You'll get me to talk about myself, the pressures of my position, the sadness of my past. Perhaps I'll shed a tear or two. You'll listen sensitively and astutely and somehow discover my secret self.....

...There is no secret self. I'm not going to reveal another me to you. I'm not going to be tamed by you. I am the king's general. I am the commander of the Second Army...."

It was so nice reading that and thenn thennnnnnn?!!?? You know what happened in chapter 23??!!!

Behold my angry notes I added at 2 AM because this scene made me want to scream.( please ignore the ton of spelling mistakes- it's really difficult to type on a Kindle and I was also shaking because I was a sleep deprived ball of rage)-

[Without all the spelling mistakes- the note basically says-

I hate what they are doing with Zoya's character here.Once she'd established with Kirigan that she was not some rough outside soft inside cliche fantasy, that he was not going to peek inside of her and see a hurt, broken and just a sensitive girl- it should've stayed like that. Just because it's Nikolai does not mean it's not an injustice to her arc to just come out as a soft hurt girl. I don't mean to insult every female character that does fit that stereotype. There's nothing wrong with it. But with the way Zoya's storyline progressed even her background I know Zoya was meant to be a tough outside tough inside girlie. She had made it clear herself and that monologue to Kirigan about how true love wasn't going to soften her edges should have been her truth. It was her truth.

Zoya didn't even need to be a sociopath or a psychopathic character for this. The author could've portrayed her weak and vulnerable moments in solitude. Hell- there was Juris the dragon inside of her. He could have been used as a plot device to show Zoya grappling with her past her mistakes, loss, grief, self-doubt, (bad) mental health, psychological pain etc.

I feel like wve the Nikolai and Zoya ship would've been better this way. There was no need to make him the knight in shining armour that breaks down the walls of the outwardly harsh but actually soft and small and weak girl. She's the General of Ravka for God's sake.]

Overall though I liked the books and fairly enjoyed them. I think on the whole the author did a stellar job - especially in terms of plot development and the charcter development of most other characters.

TL;DR- Ways I think Zoya's character was ruined for me personally.

[kru-sader]

THIS.

You're 19? Do you think things will get better or worse from here?

i think i will grab things by the throat and make them what they need to be

[kru-sader]

Hi everyone who's getting this. I missed you all and I hope everyone's been doing well ❤️.

I know it's been almost an year since my last ever post and I should probably mark my getting back with a post explaining why I was gone and what's ahead...but I finally got around to watching Shadow And Bone Web Series (im at s1 episode-8) and I really needed to get this off my chest-

If they wanted us to hate the Darkling and his wierd predatory manipulation tactics so much- WHY THE HELL DID THEY CAST BEN BARNES AS THE DARKLING!!!!

The no. of times I've felt like Alina should just give up and support the darkling in his villainous adventures is concerning. And this is coming from someone that has never- NEVER- been attracted to any kind of ship with power imbalance whatsoever.

May god help me..I've lost it.

[kru-sader]

something I very much needed to read today

[kru-sader]

[kru-sader]

[kru-sader]

Crying in the club this morning because my cats enjoy our gossip sessions as much as I do 🥺

[kru-sader]

I have so much to be thankful for when it comes to Shakespeare, the musical Something Rotten, new words added to our lexicon and phrases that we say everyday, and the one line in a play I did where I was a character called Goosefeather based on a Midsummer's Night Dream - the real high point of my acting career (hehe).

I recently finished reading and listening to the plays (I feel like if you can listen to or watch as you read the play, the words are far more interesting and really come to life from the page for you, as some of these need nuance especially to fully take them in).

To celebrate the bard's birthday, these are my favourites

Much Ado About Nothing - I loved the characters in this book and the speech given by Beatrice in this play is incredibly delivered. A speech that pushes the actor who delivers it as Beatrice boils over with rage at Benedick, this speech is something that needs to be heard in the beginning of Scene 4, Act 1. I highly recommend checking out this play, if you want an incredibly powerful female character.

A Midsummer's Night's Dream - Pretty much everyone's favourite Shakespeare, reading it you realise why this is. Characters that burst from the page and a plot that twists and turns, Elizabethan England really got lucky getting to see this one in the flesh straight from Will's quill. The character of Bottom is perfection here and the scenes with Oberon, Titania and Puck are never less than excellent.

Measure For Measure - I promise not all my favourites begin with the same letter. Measure For Measure for me stands out because of Isabella. Isabella is a young woman who plans to become a nun and then finds out her brother has been arrested and could be executed for getting his fiancee pregnant, to get out of this she is told let me sleep with you, and I'll save your brother and a bad bitch plot begins.

King Lear - He has such poor judgement when it comes to the character of those around them, and who can't relate to that? The story of a man who sees everything he built fall apart after giving his lands to everyone but the daughter her should, King Lear is definitely one of those stories which has incredible humanity and shows Shakespeare at one of his finest moments.

What are your favourite Shakespeare plays? I'd love to hear from you about your own standouts!

Others I feel like deserve a mention include Othello and Macbeth, which are two of of the most dramatic and brilliantly written plays in Shakespeare's oeuvre.

Vee xo.

[kru-sader]

the secret, i’ve discovered, to actually writing, like actually sitting down and doing the damn thing, actually getting a word count up there, is to have an idea that makes you think “that’s ridiculous and self-indulgent and nobody else but me would want to read it” and then leaning as fully into self-indulgence as possible

[kru-sader]

Just finished The Invisible Life Of Addie LaRue and now I don't know what to do with myself.

[kru-sader]

Cultural sensitivity

There’s a post about how the Avatar stories misrepresented, stereotyped and appropriated from Indian culture. Consider this, the concept of the avatar (descent) is derived from Hinduism which is the main religion of India. But the way Avatar presented parts of Hinduism is disrespectful to any follower of the faith, the third eye represents spiritual awareness and while Shiva is the god of destruction, he’s not supposed to be evil.

A character with powers based on something like the Hindu five elements (admittedly, I’m more familiar with Wuxing or the Chinese counterpart) would be kind of cool to portray. But it has to be done with respect and actual interest in such a culture, the Avatar staff certainly did respect East Asian and indigenous cultures. But when it comes to South Asian cultures, as far as I remember, it’s rather scant despite the fact that Tibet (the region that inspired the Air Nomads) was influenced by India.

Buddhism came from India, even if it persisted en masse elsewhere. One might wonder if the Avatar creators picked bobs and pieces of Indian culture, whilst perhaps distorting those borrowings. As what somebody said, Shiva’s not an evil god and the third eye actually has spiritual importance for Hindus. There are three ways to get away with this, either include a respectful portrayal of Indian-coded characters there or hope and pray for your country to be heavily influenced by India.

(I actually did this with China, yes I did it).

Or hang out a lot in any place with a substantial Indian presence (either an Indian community or India itself), though with the former you really have to know where to look. When it comes to borrowing aspects from different cultures, you’d have to be sincere and respectful with how you do it otherwise it would feel really fake and disrespectful.

[kru-sader]

Read that again

[kru-sader]

[ID: a tag reading, “#don’t eat citrus if you have any mental health problems #the vitamin C is so bad for you” end ID]

losing my fucking mind over how people will come on here and say just the easiest to disprove absolutely inane lies. for no reason at all

[kru-sader]

Hello please reblog this if you're okay with people sending you random asks to get to know you better