l-o-v-emergency

[l-o-v-emergency]

"Ikaw lang patutunguhan".☘︎ ݁˖ — Taesan Filo Au

🥀—A long time crush, Aviel never gave up on Taesan. Kahit anong reject, kahit anong hindi, naniniwala parin ang dalaga na balang araw, siya narin ang pipiliin. Ngunit, paano kung kelan oras na, siya namang pagkawala?

Genre: Romance, Youth, Angst

Warnings: Mention of hospitals, cigarettes, family problems

Now playing: Ikaw lang patutunguhan by Amiel Sol, La la lost you by NIKI

Word count: 1.6k

* ੈ✩ ₊˚

[12:30 AM]

Anong oras na, chat parin ng chat tong si Aviel. We've been friends, probably since highschool. Unfortunately, hanggang college kasama ko parin siya. Sabi niya, SABI NIYA, gusto niya raw talaga ang kursong kinuha niya—BS Accountancy.

Tapos, rinig ko pa sa kaibigan niya, kinuha niya lang talaga to dahil nandito ako. Minsan di ko malaman laman anong balak nito sa buhay. She was an out going type of person, go with a flow pero takot sa mangyayari sa furture niya.

A total opposite of mine, I know what I want and don't. I already figured and planned my life out the moment I step on college. Well, that's what I thought.

Aviel

Baks, gising ka pa?

Sa tingin mo?

Yown! Pasama ako 7 11

Viel, it's already midnight

Kala mo naman bago! DALI NA

Maninigarilyo ka nanaman?

HOY HINDI

Sama mo naman sakin:(

Omw

12:35 AM

Yes. She's smoking. Mas malala dati. She said it was her coping mechanism, but still.

"May nangyari nanaman ba?" Una kong bati dito. She's wearing a gray oversized hoodie, hood over head covering her messy long hair. "Gaga, di ba pwedeng miss lang kita?" ngiti nito sakin sabay kapit sa aking braso na kala mong linta.

"Can you please—"pilit kong alis ng yakap niya sakin. Lakas talaga nito. "IIIIHHH!!!"

"Ano ba bibilhin mo?"

"Anong sakin? Bilhan kita potchi!"

"Huh? For what?" As far as I know, wala namang event kanina. She usually gave me gifts everytime na may ganap. It may be Christmas, New Years, Valentines, ewan ko bakit pati sa Independence day.

And its always...potchi. Just because I like them.

"Hala! To naman! Syempre, tapos na tayo sa midterms" oh, yes. "Is that a big deal?"

"Oo naman no!"

"You know I rejected you, right?" Napatigil ito sa kanyang paglalakad. Pati tuloy ako, napatigil narin. I was just staring at her, waiting for her reply. "U-uhm...ayun na yung 7 11 oh! Bilisan na natin anong oras na!" As always, change of topic.

[9:00 PM - February 19]

"You know I'm studying, right? May quizbee ako bukas" it may sound bad, pero totoo naman. Ito agad ang bungad ko kay Aviel. Randomly calling me at night. "Ay, sorry! I just want to see you lang naman..." she replied, lips were pierced to each other.

Leaving a light sighed, I walked towards her. "Go on, what do you need?" A huge smile was plastered on her face. "Here" abot nito sakin ng sobre. Its not just a normal envelope, it was decorated with small bows and pinky stickers. It even has a small bump, probably a candy.

"What's this?" I asked, acting dump. "Letter" she smiled innocently, hiding both of her hands behind her back. "I know, I mean—"

"I like you, Taesan"

I know.

"Yun yung letter" silenced. Hindi ko alam kung anong isasagot ko sa kanya. All this time, I only see her as a friend. This is probably the third time she confessed. I never expect na aabot pa hanggang college.

"Aviel, you know—"

"I know. Pero, sana hayaan mo lang ako? Kapag kasi pinipigilan ko, mas lalo lang akong napapamahal sayo, San" sambit nito. "Just let me, San?"

[12:30 PM]

Lunch break.

Forgot to bring mine, so I don't have a choice but to go to our cafeteria na napagka-layo sa building namin. Ayaw ata nila kaming pakainin.

"Taesan! Kain ka Cafeteria?" salubong sakin ng kaibigan ko—Leehan. One of the well-known students here. A role model. He's the president of Central Student Council and also an athlete. No wonder, a lot of girls were running for him.

"Yeah, nakalimutan ko baon ko"

"Oh? Hinahanap ka nga ni Aviel kanina" he knows her? "Oo. She's literally my classmate, tol"

"LEEHAN! SABAY TAYO KAIN—" biglang sigaw ng isang matinis na boses mula sa kabilang hallway. It was her, Aviel. Her jolly smile were there. Checks were red as roses.

"Oh, Taesan. Pinapa-abot ngapala ni tita" sabay abot sakin ng isang eco-bag, containing my lunch. "Tara na, Han! Sabay tayo! Libre kita" she happily told him, she was excited. Clinging onto his arms.

"Ah, sige tol. Una na kami, SUNOD KA!" habol ni Leehan sabay takbo kasama si Aviel.

Kelan pa kayo naging close?

[8:30 PM]

Hindi ako mapakali. Naka-tayo lang ako sa labasan ng bahay namin. I was waiting for her. Usually around 7, naka-uwi na yon. The thing is, lagi kaming sabay. Ngayon, sumama siya kay Leehan. It's not that I don't trust my friend. it's just...

"Nagseselos ka ba?"

Unang bungad sakin ni Aviel the moment I bombed her with questions. Saan ka galing? Bakit late ka umuwi? Nasan si Leehan? Inaalagaan ba siya ng maayos? Anong nangyari?

"Hindi ah! Bakit mo naman iisipin yan?"

She just left out a small laughed. "Taesan, crush mo talaga ako, 'no?"

I scoffed. "How many times ba kita ire-reject para i-let go mo ko, ha?"

"I won't, San"

"Hindi ka ba naaawa sa sarili mo niyan?" she looked down, piercing her lips once again. "You know, San. Sometimes in life, you don't have other choices but just keep on going. Although it was clear that it was not meant for you..." bigla niya nalang akong tinignan sa mga mata.

Aviel...

[3:00 AM - May]

Ilang buwan na kaming walang usap ni Aviel. The only assurance I had is nakikita ko siyang lumalabas ng bahay nila at uuwi. Minsan, nakikita ko sa school. Pero hanggang doon lang. We never talked ever since. Even my chats, they were ignored.

At first, maybe she was busy. We are busy. Thesis defense na kasi. Until I decided to go outside. Hindi kasi ako makatulog.

Doon, nakita ko. Ang dating Aviel. Trying to light up the cigarette on her mouth, covering from the wind. I have no other choice but to snatched it from her.

"Hoy—" she was snapped the moment she saw me. Her eyes were swollen. The redness were still visible under her eyes. I knew it, there's something wrong.

Napalunok lamang ito sabay tungo. "What happened?" She tried to speak, but no words can scape from her mouth. "Tara, 7 11"

[3:15 AM]

Silenced. The sound of crickets were the only thing that we could hear. I brought her a milk, a usual drink that calms her down.

In one gulped, she sighed. "Taesan?" I hummed. "Do you think...the world could've been better if I wasn't born?"

I didn't respond. I don't want to respond. "Do you think...both of my parents could've a better life? Without us?" She land her gaze on me. It was sparkiling. A tear scaped from her almond eyes.

"Aviel..."

She smiled bitterly. "Malapit na pala birthday ko..."

"Hmm...what do you want?"

"A restart. A restart button"

She looked away. "I want to restart everything, Taesan. To live a truthful life, not surrounded by lies"

[8:00 PM]

I just finished my classes. They were tough, but it was bearable. At least. Could've been better if...

"Kuya! Kanina ka pa dito?" Hindi ko na namalayan, nasa tabi ko na pala ang kapatid ni Aviel—Aries. "Just got here" I noted as I opened the door. As usual, the smell was good. Nag-request talaga kami na panatilihing mabango ang kuwarto niya, para pag nagising siya, hindi siya badtrip.

"Waah! Kainis talaga yung isa kong kaklase. Muntik ko na masapak, kuya!" I just chuckled at his silly little stories. "Wag kang gumaya sa ate mo"

"Di ko nga alam kung gigising pa yan" buntong-hininga nito sabay upo sa kabilang couch malapit sa bintana. I decided to sit on a monoblock near her bed. Though we were talking, the sound of the machines can still clearly hear.

"Kuya...gigising pa ba si ate?" Muling tanong ni Aries. Ever since that incident happened, bigla nalang nawalan ng malay si Aviel, the only question he has is kung magigising pa ba ang ate niya.

Both of their parents were working, so most of the time, kaming dalawa ang bantay. "Of course she will. She's a strong person" I assure him.

"Alam mo kuya, feeling ko alam ko na sagot sa tanong ko" I hummed. "Siguro...mas ok na rin na hindi na gumising si ate"

"Hmm? Bakit naman?"

"Pagod na kasi siya, kuya. Naaawa na ko kay ate" ani nito. "Alam mo, pag nag aaway sila mama at papa, mas pipiliin niyang marinig lahat nang yon"

"How?"

"Kinukulong ako ni ate sa kuwarto tsaka pinapasuot sakin yung earphones niya. Kahit alam kong ayaw niya, pipilitin niyang siya nalang makarinig lahat kesa makita ko" ngayon ko lang narinig to. Aviel never opened up about family related problems. She will rather keep those on her own. One thing is because she doesn't want to ruin the names of her family. Malalaman ko nalang kapag naninigarilyo siya.

"Do you know that your ate smokes?"

Tumango ito. "Kahit ayaw ko, di ko siya mapigilan. Wala akong magawa eh, coping mechanism narin niya. Kaya, para narin sa kanya, mas gugustuhin ko nalang mag pahinga siya kesa sa nakikita kong nahihirapan siya..."

"...kahit ayaw ko"

[10:00 PM]

Pinatulog ko na si Aries. He cried, again. Gabi-gabi yan, umiiyak. Hindi sa ayaw na niyang makasama ang ate niya, but also for her peace narin.

I miss you, Aviel. Siguro kung nakikita mo ko ngayon, papaulanin mo ko ng tanong. Bakit ka nandito? Bakit mo ko inaalagaan? Ayaw mo sakin pero nandito ka? You'll probably even try to kick me out of the room. Yet, a sweet smile will still be formed on your face.

I miss that, Aviel. I miss your jolly personality, eagerness, and positivity in life. Knowing that you've through a lot behind those sunshines you gave to us, to me. I miss you, Aviel. Wake up na, please? Your brother is waiting for you...he misses her ate na. Aviel, please? Say my name again. Lets go out again in the middle of the night and talk nonsenses...

Aviel...I—

"Taesan?"

[l-o-v-emergency]

ekalalnextpinto - mini filo smau

tambal: bnd x reader

tala ng manunulat: auq talaga gumagawa ng smau pero here's an attempt ig. critique niyo nga, hindi kasi talaga ako funny pagpasensyahan niyo na. pangit pala quality nung ibang pics, im still figuring how to uoload 10+ pics from computer w/o sacrificing the quality.(line divider from here)

babala: ang post na ito ay nagtataglay ng mga hindi magagandang salita at puro kagaguhan.

[l-o-v-emergency]

WAIT! diko ineexpect na may tatlo pataas na juandoor dito

walang hiyang pag eendorso! (shameless promo)

mga syug may mas nauna saking juandoor dito, pakisuportahan naman si madam @toastbtterbread ! 🤩🔫🙏 may on-going siyang filo woonhak au

suportahan niyo na mga syug sobra ng piso computation niya maawa kayo 😭😭

[l-o-v-emergency]

defense offended ! - lalakingkapitbahay as ka-grupo mo sa research (+ rating n/10)

bumibida: lalakingkapitbahay

uri: ewan ko hc ata tawag dun, bullet, tagalog, medj funny

tala ng manunulat: tinatakbuhan ko mga pending ko so eto. sana magparamdam na mga noypi juandoors na nagtatago diyan

sungho

♡ laging leader

♡ kaso since naging leader na siya last sem pinagbawalan na siya maging leader ulit

♡ pinaka productive at reliable na member

♡ since may experience na siya sa pagiging leader, alam niya lahat ng hirap at pagod ng pagiging leader

♡ kaya naman lagi siyang maaga magpasa ng rrl

♡ speaking of rrl

♡ magaling siya maghanap ng rrl

♡ sasabihin niyang gscholar, researchgate at scihub lang din naman gamit niya pero ang ganda ng lahat ng rrl niya

♡ responsive din siya sa messenger (lord where ganitong member)

♡ helping hand literal, bibigyan ka ng advice nung napansin niyang lumalabas na true colors ng members niyo

♡ "dapat diyan nilalaglag" bukambibig niya sayo pag may ghoster na member

♡ minsan pa siya na kumakausap sa members niyo kapag unti unti na silang naglalaho

♡ kasi alam niyang busy ka mag proof read at mag edit ng docs

♡ kaya nagugulat ka na lang minsan biglang narereincarnate mga ibang members niyo

♡ halos asst leader mo na siya dahil sa sobrang participative niya

♡ kaya naging crush mo siya during research eh

♡ main slayer ng defense niyo

♡ dahil sa kanya yung panelist pa ang nagisa

♡ overall 100/10 super gandang maging ka group

riwoo

♡ laging wala sa meeting

♡ nasa meeting minsan pero naglalaro naman ng ml

♡ ayaw mo talaga siyang kagroup nung una kasi mukhang pabigat

♡ surprisingly maambag naman

♡ lagi nga lang nagccram

♡ madalas pag nagpapasa ng assigned part niya patulog ka na ng madaling araw

♡ dont judge a book by its cover talaga

♡ since di mo nga kasi ganun pa siya kakilala binigay mo lang def of term sa kanya sa ch1

♡ pero nung ch2 nagulat ka kasi ang ganda ng mga local lit na pinasa niya

♡ tapos sa ch3 din nagulat ka kasi maayos din write ups niya

♡ plus siya na lang talaga maasahan mo kasi yung iba niyong kagroup nangghost na

♡ mahirap lang talaga siya kausapin kasi lagi siyang naglalaro

♡ online sa ml pero di nagrereply sa messenger

♡ pero maayos naman siyang member

♡ buhat na buhat din niya ch4 niyo sa totoo lang

♡ medyo tahimik lang siya sa defense

♡ sasabihin lang niya nasa script niya pero nakakasagot naman sa gisa

♡ 9/10 maayos na member pero mahirap makausap

myung jaehyun

♡ on par toh kay sungho baks if not mas magaling pa ata

♡ i dont mean this in an insulting way pero personality wise kasi diba di mo naman ineexpect na academic achiever toh si teh

♡ pero achiever si mj irl mas active lang talaga si sungho sa extracurriculars kaya lagi siyang ginagawang designated brain

♡ medyo intimidating siya sa simula

♡ kaya ayun medyo off siya nung una niyong meeting

♡ pero that same day nung gabi nagulat ka kasi nagpm siya sayo

♡ he lowkey felt bad kasi na medyo parang awkward siya kaya sa chat niya na lang sinabi mga ideas niya for research topics na hindi niya nasabi kanina

♡ siyempre yung kanya yung napili ng research adviser niyo kasi maganda mga topics niya

♡ super duper reliable niya???? like andami niyang alam na mga unknown but credible sources sa rrl niyo

♡ ikaw leader pero siya ang taga proofread niyo

♡ responsive din niya

♡ very opinionated pero in a good way, hindi yung "diko sure diko alam kayo na bahala" type of member

♡ lagi siyang nagbibigay ng inputs sa gawa mo especially sa write ups mo tas super helpful ng mga sinasabi niya

♡ nakutuban mo na eh pero dinismiss mo lang as paghanga

♡ pero nung defense niyo na dun ka na nafall (HUI)

♡ halimaw siya sa presentation, napaka eloquent niya magsalita

♡ buhat na buhat niya grupo niyo kaya naman di na masyado nagtanong sa inyo after presentation, defended agad paper niyo 10/10

taesan

♡ ghoster

♡ di nagsasalita sa meeting

♡ di nagrereply sa messenger

♡ pabigat yan si teh

♡ eme lang hindi naman

♡ sakto lang naman

♡ pero madalas nga kasi siyang wala sa meeting niyo after class kasi may practice siya sa banda

♡ so chinachat mo na lang siya sa mga napagusapan niyo at kung anong naka assign sa kanya

♡ di siya nagseseen sa gc kaya nagppm ka na lang tapos iseseen ka lang niya

♡ super corporate typing vibes chatbox niyo purely research lang talaga

♡ you: nagsend ng MoM at assigned part niya

♡ taesan: seen tapos the next day ipapasa niya gawa niya

♡ at least hindi siya late magpasa and hindi rin basura writings niya

♡ super kabado ka for him nung defense niyo kasi nga di siya nagpupunta ng meeting kaya ginawan mo siya ng pointers

♡ maayos naman defense niyo minor revisions lang

♡ pero nagulat ka lang na after nun parang nagkaroon ng something sa inyo ni taesan

♡ dati di kayo naguusap at all pero after defense nagugulat ka na lang may chat siya nagtatanong tungkol sa assignment niyo

♡ minsan binabati ka niya pag napapadaan ka sa harap niya

♡ hala parang gusto mo na tuloy manood sa gig mg banda niya

♡ 7/10

leehan

♡ awa na lang lord, super ghoster as in

♡ di mo makakausap sa chat kahit kailan

♡ sa personal naman natatakot kang kausapin siya

♡ kung may boys at the back, ito boy at the side

♡ laging sa may dingding nakadikit tapos mag-isa lang siya usually

♡ tapos napaka serious pa ng face niya

♡ kaya siya na mismo lumapit sayo nung narealize niyang intimidated ka sa kanya

♡ hindi daw talaga siya gumagamit ng cellphone kaya ganun

♡ so ang naging set up niyo ay dun kayo sa bahay niya gumagawa ng parts niyong dalawa + wala ka din proper study space sa bahay niyo

♡ nung una kala mo pancit canton na lang iaambag niya kasi inoffer nga niyang sa bahay na lang niya kayo gumawa

♡ pero super matulungin naman siya

♡ not as good as mj or sungho pero hes really really helpful tapos fast learner din

♡ parang si riwoo, kung ano lang nasa script niya yun lang sasabihin niya

♡ pero nung may follow up questions sa kanya nasasagot naman niya

♡ after defense niyo grabe ang gulat ng tc niyo kasi may ibubuga naman pala yung pinakatahimik na bata sa klase niyo

♡ 6/10 okay naman ka group medyo handful lang

woonhak

♡ pancit canton

♡ jk

♡ ayaw niya talaga ng research (who doesnt tbh)

♡ nung una kala mo talaga magiging pabigat toh

♡ hindi naman siya pabigat pero

♡ nung una talaga wala siyang maiambag kasi wala talaga siyang alam

♡ paano eh walang ginawa kun'di matulog sa klase tas paggising basketball atupag

♡ he feels bad kaya siya na nagkusa na manghingi ng tulong sayo

♡ siyempre hindi ka tumanggi, kanya kanyang effor toh pero lahat naman kayo magsheshare sa grade

♡ mabilis naman matuto

♡ very maaasahan sa survey and lahat ng lakarin na kailangan niyo

♡ isang ngiti lang niya nakapirma na ng waiver/approval/permit letter lahat ng nilalapitan niyong need niyo ng pirma

♡ minsan late magpasa ng part niya pero pag nagpasa maayos naman gawa

♡ hindi man siya ganun ka masalita pero ramdam mo naman efforts niya

♡ parehas kayong puyat kasi magdamag na inaaral bawat kasulok sulukan ng research niyo

♡ nagprint pa yan siya ng script niya sa presentation

♡ first time niyo makitang kabado bente

♡ pero would slay and eat his part sa defense

♡ pati follow up questions (gisa) nasasagot niya naman without needing your help

♡ 9/10 would reco maging ka group

♡ very maeffort and hardworking

[l-o-v-emergency]

﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵

mahal kita, baby, baby, baby

sinisigaw ko alam na ng lahat ng tao dito (gusto kita!)

pagpapakilala

୨୧ steby, they/them ୨୧

About

ཐིཋྀ filo writer

ཐིཋྀ for zerobaseone and boynextdoor

ཐིཋྀ will accept and entertain suggestions/anons but no requests (college student)