lavenderc4t - Tumblr blog

lavenderc4t · 24 days ago

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i kind of miss five if anyone cares

#this is the annual post about this guy that i love #also hello everyone happy pride month #every day i just miss him its fine

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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whys it so scary to post things on the blogging site no one cares this much but you girl

#ashley rambles

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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saw a post on pinterest that gave me their energy and i cried. this is SO FUNNY goodness gracious. i love when my bf just shits on his best friend. its actually so funny and so real to me.

anyway hi. i like making fake tweets if ANYONE CARES... pastamed au you are FAMOUS to me forever and ever <3

also im nervous (this isnt even related to selfshipping i just thought this was funny as hell). but i wanna share stupid shit in my crp lore and non-canon following. so theres that. also the most vital thing here is to be yourself and be silly and post whatever. so thats something. also why they like that

#nervous to post this but i need others to see this because its SO FUNNY #why am i so nervous i talked about this plentiful times before ugh #whats sad i cant really make polls i had to like edit the screenshot to give me the poll results sorry > <#BUT ITS SO FUNNY GOODNESS #bens url being that is actually just an inside joke and something hed totally use as a url #jeffs is... his is self explanatory :thumbsup:#uhhhh #pastamed au #<- finally i can use this tag #might not have a lot but it is funny so uh yeah hi #f/o: ben #<- for me

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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one of the things im trying to overcome which is EXTREMELY difficult for me is being shamelessly open about lore, writing, the likes. it gets to a point i just dont wanna share anything with anyone out of immense fear of what would happen. but ive also learned that you cant live in constant fear all your life. you cant just stay in the same spot, you HAVE to get out of your comfort zone.

honestly, one of my friends is talking about an au that she ABSOLUTELY LOVES and its just so lovely to see and i love listening to it, and i think thats sort of the key reason why its helping me so much.

i dont know if i talked about this and i probably have many many times, but having something that is so crucial to you as a person, like your creativity, your hobbies, your ideas, and wants, get immensely sucked out of you is honestly horrific and awful. like just having it all get stomped on and ignored really impacts you to a point where you wonder if what youre doing actually means anything.

it is slowly coming back to me and i feel as if i can do the things i truly do love once more. time does heal all wounds and i really needed time to realise that. i truly do feel a lot more lighter and happier. and i feel as if im getting back into myself and just how i was typically! so thats a huuuuuge plus and im so proud of myself! ^_^

#i also wrote a drabble which i think is kind of... awful? but then again i havent really written anything in a LONG time #so i guess that makes sense >_<#idk but i do know that i have more love and i get a lot more smiley and giggly and gushy about characters #more so than i did before and i have more ideas and just thoughts in general #so i think thats a HUGE bonus #i like seeing my progress. i like knowing im happier. its taking a while. but im happy.#i also like talking into the void more than anything its soothing and comforting #ashley rambles

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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im the happiest girl in the entire world venti my love youre home hello

#I WAS SO CLOSE ON CRYING #the funniest thing about this is the time i played genshin the first time #his banner was already out #and now in my SECOND playthrough hes here #he misses me so much....#my love ......... my world........ he makes me so happy........#arrghfhdgfdgfdh #ashley rambles

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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im having fun again ^_^ i love selfshipping and thinking of silly lore for my f/os hehehe im so happy

i think its mostly because im thinking more of a fandom and character that brings me SO MUCH comfort and happiness but either way im so happy \o/

#ashley rambles

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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kind of upsetting to learn that twinote on android just decided to say no to me on seeing likes or retweets that you add. you can only do that shit on ios. i hate you. i hate you people who have ios... how am i going to work on my pastamed au if i dont have the silly feature of adding likes or retweets to the stupid tweets i make... WHATEVER. ill find a way . . .

#i keep thinking about it every so often . . .#its very silly in my head . . .#ill probably use it still regardless but CMON are you SERIOUS thats so awful :(#i actually have been more able to think about this sort of stuff more freely #thank goodness for that because i have SO MANY IDEAS #i also found like a website to make them so i could use that if i think certain tweets deserve to be shown likes / retweets etc #or its just easier to go to it instead idk #hmmm #thinking out loud #ashley rambles

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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i should really remake my selfship playlist(s)... some of them arent it... or some of them ARE but i just dont like the vibes it gives... hmmm

#ill listen to the old ones too to see if any song there fits #who knows i dont #ashley rambles

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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This is my comfort character but if I think about them for too long I take incredible amounts of psychic damage

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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hmmm... bens bday is today.... or well i guess he doesnt have like an actual birthday like 90% of them just have fan agreed birthdays so ill take what i can get but happy birthday silly guy ...

speaking of... i think ben would find his birthday quite unneeded or just doesnt see the point of it all that much. the others probably would make their bdays THE BIGGEST THING IMAGINABLE and bens not caring about it. hed probably be like "ok. my bday. thats cool. i guess" and he MOVES ON and makes it any typical day ever

adding my own spin to fanon because thats what makes ME happy is wonderful and joyous

#trying to talk and be open about my thoughts btw #<- its a lot easier with a much less crowded blog that does make me fear for my life #also yeah....... i still adore ben drowned <- that guy invades my thoughts #hes forever with me hes special #<- i want to throw him across the world #i might have more but no idea :pensive:#f/o: ben #ashley rambles

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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you cant win a game if youre not willing to play

#this ones so oh my lord #f/o: 💜🎲#q

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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my least favourite thing about knowing its almost summer is how it gets so incredibly hot. stop doing that

#ashley rambles

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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I can't stand him. I love him so much I actually can't look at him. It effects me physically like I have to kill him with hammers immediately. I have a smash a barrel . over his head

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lavenderc4t · 2 months ago

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