legume-larsonist - Tumblr blog

[legume-larsonist]

pic of my pc

[legume-larsonist]

how long is Mattie's coffee order

Oh I was a barista for a bit, Mattie would order the most annoying possible drink.

He'd order a long shot of a specific roast so you have to switch out the grounds, with cappuccino foam so you need some actual skill with the steamer, and made of a dairy that doesn't foam consistently like coconut milk.

And then he would ask you to drown it in like six pumps of caramel syrup so none of the subtle instructions actually matter.

And somehow he would be able to taste if you didn't make it properly. And he would be INCREDIBLY nice about asking you to remake it. He sounds so pathetic and sad that you kinda feel bad for him even though he asked for a 16oz Shithead Deluxe.

Mattie with huge TBH creature eyes looking up at you so pathic and wet: "Sorry to bother you dahling, but...well...i think perhaps my drink was made with a ristretto shot, rather than the long i asked for...and it does not have the whipped cream on top...again, terribly sorry to bother you dahling..."

[legume-larsonist]

help me they are putting my cats in situations

[legume-larsonist]

Once US civil war 2 happens, Cuba should take Florida while they're not looking

[legume-larsonist]

I can’t get over this lmaooo

[legume-larsonist]

imagine being born in the ace attorney universe with a name like Rick R. Mortis and just knowing you are not built to last

[legume-larsonist]

I've asked this question before and been surprised by the results, now I have access to more weirdos it's your problem:

It is the middle of a Sunday afternoon. You have nothing on, and aren't expecting visitors, deliveries or post.

Unexpectedly, there is a knock at the door.

[legume-larsonist]

before and after we taught him Frost Shield 🥺🥺

[legume-larsonist]

Skydiving

[legume-larsonist]

[legume-larsonist]

funny

[legume-larsonist]

mr president sir i have to inform you with my sincerest regret that the special agent we sent to retrieve your daughter was killed in action. she has been confirmed dead. yeah we- yeah we should have seen it coming that the crotchless anubis leather harness would leave him vulnerable to, vulnerable to being grabbed ahold of by a sloppy critter, yes. horrific oversight. i'm so sorry sir

[legume-larsonist]

i cant

[legume-larsonist]

Finally got a clear shot of noonoo carrying her spring, it's her favourite toy

[legume-larsonist]