lifeintheshadows

[lifeintheshadows]

I don’t think we acknowledge as a fandom how insane it actually was for Pekka Rollins to scam the Rietveld boys. Like he put so much effort into it, he hired people to pretend to his wife and daughter, rented out a coffeeshop to pretend to do business in, pretended to be father figure to two recently (like weeks ago recently!) orphaned children all to scam them out of whatever meager funds they had,,, like that’s actually insane behavior. He was already rich, not that anything could justify scamming literal children, but he was already fucking rich. Not mention I sincerely doubt that the money he got out of them was MORE than he sunk into the scam. Which begs the question why??? For fun??? Just because he could??? Ego??? Because tricking children is far from impressive. Like no matter the motivation, that man is fucking evil.

[lifeintheshadows]

“Jordie wouldn’t even be able to recognize Kaz now—” but what if he could? What if all he sees in Kaz is the little boy he left behind? What if he sees through Kaz’s persona? What if he knows deep down all Kaz is a boy who misses his big brother? What then?

[lifeintheshadows]

okay I know we’re all acutely aware of how tragic the Rietvelds story is from Kaz perspective but it’s incredible depressing from Jordie’s end too. Because you have this thirteen year old boy, this child, who just lost his father, now has to shoulder the responsibility of not only his own life but that of his little brother, who’s probably so confused and scared, who discovered your father’s body, and all you can think about is how that’s gonna haunt him for the rest his life. Who doesn’t understand why they have to sell the farm, why they have to leave the only home they ever known. But at least he goes along with it and for a while, things seem good. You’ve got a job, you’re meeting with a man who SEES your potential and you think you’re gonna be able to give your baby brother the life he deserves. But then the rug is pulled from beneath your feet, it was a lie, all of it. You had been a fool and now you have nothing. you look at your baby brother’s face and all you can think is how you’ve doomed him. As you both starve and are dying slowly from an illness with no cure, all you think is how you’ve failed and you know the end is coming for you, you try to speak to your brother to tell him what exactly? I love you? I’m sorry? It doesn’t matter, you’re to weak to talk anyway, you pass without a sound and only a brother to remember you. Oh, Jordie Rietveld, the tragedy you are.

[lifeintheshadows]

You know what's a small detail that soooooo many people seem to forget that's generally pretty inconsequential, but I notice it every time I see it?

Kaz and Jordie are NOT from Lij. They're actually from a completely separate, unnamed place. Which sounds unbelievable, I know, because everyone tends to include that information in various posts and content and etc, but I swear it's true! Look:

It specifically says that Lij is about two towns over from where Kaz and Jordie grew up. So where are they actually from??? The world may never know.

[lifeintheshadows]

jordie lives au but he comes back and kaz keeps getting surprised by things he does bc the version of jordie that he made into his inner critic/justification for his actions/knight in shining armor/fool/failure is so far removed from who jordan johannus rietveld actually was

[lifeintheshadows]

I dislike when people write Kaz and Alive!Jordie where they hate each other. They would be horribly codependent. They would sleep in the same room well into adult-hood. They would panic whenever the other was slightly late for something. If the other gets sick they freak out and start worrying they'll die.

[lifeintheshadows]

in my jordie rietveld feels rn and not even in a “kaz is so tragic” way but like… jordie was just a kid too, man. sure he was irresponsible, but he was doing what he thought he had to do to protect his baby brother. he thought he lost everything and then he lost even more. if the narrative had gone in a slightly different direction, if it favored jordie more than kaz, he would be the main character in his own revenge story. do you think that he regretted trusting pekka, at the end? do you think that the last thing he felt was guilt?

[lifeintheshadows]

the contrast between jordie in kaz’s memories, and the ghost of jordie that haunts him, is something so jarring to me. because we all know jordie was kind, kaz’s older brother that bought him hot chocolate and a coat and would stop at nothing to look after him. he even died cuddling his little brother. so then why is the jordie that haunts kaz so mean? why does kaz seem to seek jordie’s forgiveness, despite doing nothing wrong? underneath it all, he believes it was his fault jordie died.

[lifeintheshadows]

I know I've definitely seen posts abt this before, but I can't get over how much the 'Jordie' in Kaz's head is just... not Jordie. Like obviously it's not, bc he's dead, but it's also not even accurate to Kaz's memory of him.

Like these are the sorts of things that are attributed to 'the voice of' Jordie:

Jordie had come for his vengeance at last. It's time to pay your debts, Kaz. You never get something for nothing. But he could hear Jordie laughing. No, little brother. No one is stronger. You've cheated death too many times. Greed may do your bidding, but death serves no man.

While Jordie was no stranger to grandstanding statements, and one might argue Kaz actually picked that habit up from him ('The city is winning so far, but you'll see who wins in the end' for example), these aren't the sorts of things he'd have said to his kid brother??? Yes, he could be arrogant, and he's snappy with / acts superior to Kaz a few times, but as far as we see, Jordie is mostly very good with Kaz; he has a remarkable tolerance for/patience with him, especially for a newly orphaned thirteen year old. Kaz admittedly comes across as a quiet kid and is pretty compliant; he rarely talks to anyone except Jordie and Saskia, he seems to just watch for most of their interactions with 'Hertzoon', he largely does as he's told and doesn't wander off, but he's still like... nine, and wants to do stuff like see the magicians and make all the dogs walk at once, and sulks when Jordie stops him from doing stuff and makes him stay inside. We also see Jordie pretty frequently lying to Kaz to try and make him feel better. But this mental-Jordie is not a comforting presence. The start of SOC is literally set up to make you think Jordie is someone that Kaz has swindled or betrayed, that he fears will come back for vengeance, so it's a big 'oh wait wtf' moment when you realise that he's not a rival gang member or anything, he's just his brother, and it wasn't his fault. But you wouldn't know it! Kaz wants 'Jordie's' voice silenced 'forever' and seems afraid of it, almost— at least, it turns up in vulnerable moments. He thinks that 'paying his debt' (i.e. taking out Rollins) will get rid of it. (Sorry hon. It won't.) Kaz thinks at one point that he still sees Jordie as "infallible" and looks at him through the eyes of the child he'd been, but in other scenes he's glove-puppeting 'his brother' to punish himself. I guess he still sees Jordie, even in death, as the ultimate authority figure, and to cope with guilt/stress/grief he imagines that this is something he's being compelled or commanded to do, and that when he does it he'll have redeemed himself, when really it's just desperate flailing to get the closure he couldn't have. I'm sure he knows goddamn well that this isn't actually what Jordie wanted for him ('You'll go to school') and that's why the mental 'Jordie' is really off, because Kaz knows its not really the will of his brother— it's just him. It talks like him! He doesn't even try to imitate the real Jordie! It's just Kaz, alone— but he's never really been able to come to terms with that.

[lifeintheshadows]

i haven't liked six of crows OR shadow and bone for a while until i stumbled across one of my bookmarked jordie lives fics.

jordie rietveld my beloved <3

[lifeintheshadows]

the darkling is the funniest bitch in ravka I swear. literally all of this is in the span of less than twenty pages he's great

[lifeintheshadows]

me when sun characters are terrifying and destructive. me when light is an overwhelming damaging power. me w

[lifeintheshadows]

He doesn't feel like himself, when he isn't saving someone

Siege and Storm- Chapter 18

Yeah, Malyen is Alina's guard, but he behaved as if he were a white knight from a fairy tale before, and he didn't think about her twice, when he was running from her to play a hero elsewhere.

He believes her to be in need of saving, so he doesn't pay attention to the state she's in. He doesn't see her as capable to take care of herself and order next course of action. She's still his damsel, not the leader he's supposed to guard.

Alina: *mentions a horde of untrained, unarmed normies believing she's some miracle-worker, likely to be slaugtered as soon as they enter battlefield*

Malyen's inferiority complex:

Damn, Alina's the rational one!

Malyen just jealous, as always...

[lifeintheshadows]

The sunshine character just sobbing their eyes out in the arms of the dark and jaded one

[lifeintheshadows]

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[lifeintheshadows]

Be careful who you trust

Siege and Storm- Chapter 18

Religious fanatic forbids Alina to light the way, and suddenly she's gone and the Apparat there?

... some sleep two doors from you...

... or you just let him go.

"Forgive me." for failing to catch him, letting him go or secretly serving him all this time?

[lifeintheshadows]

Alina's prophecies

Siege and Storm- Chapter 18

I feel like there's more to Alina's fake Suli prophecies, but let's be honest- my brain froze during this chapter and I can't seem to be able to delve into it, so I'll just point out her contribution.

Because hot men are always secretly evil! Never let your pussy guide you!!!

Suli seem to take their seers seriously, but I doubt some nouveau riche invite them for more than simple entertainment. They're supposed to be fun, but Alina doesn't even make fun of her "customers", she's outright cruel.

She sees a couple of giggly carefree girls, likely dreaming of finding a good match and a good husbands in the same person, no matter how unusual would that be, and turns Malyen's promises upside down.

Yes, you will get what you want, but it will be the the worst thing for you. Picking the path you think will make you miserable will pay off.

Somehow it feels like Alina's punishing them for being what she's not allowed to be- young and seemingly without responsibilities.

Next are two drunk noblemen:

They (possibly) offend Alina's not-exactly-friend, so she uses it as an excuse to take justice in her own hands and does her best to at least hurt their feelings.

She aims well.

The best way to offend people is to give voice to what they already fear.

... and mysterious STDs always work.

The man seemed to have something to say about bastards and infidelity... how likely is it that he speaks from experience?