liiionhearted - Tumblr blog

[liiionhearted]

why is club penguin shaped like the toilet from art ?

[liiionhearted]

the reason armand hated claudia wasn't because of louis or lestat or whatever it was because claudia was turned younger than him so he no longer held the record for youngest prettiest jailbaitiest vampire in town. and that sent him into a spiral

[liiionhearted]

Do you enjoy normal things

no

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you know the drill, op disabled reblogs etc etc etc

[liiionhearted]

It makes absolutely perfect sense. Doesn't compel me though.

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[liiionhearted]

Patrick Ness

[liiionhearted]

kicked out of the bdsm scene for saying “you got it, boss!” in an old timey henchman voice whenever someone tells me what to do

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[liiionhearted]

Amok Time being Chekov's first episode will never not be funny to me. It's his first day on the job and the first officer is in heat

[liiionhearted]

Melanistic and Albino Southern tamandua (Tamandua tetradactyla)

[liiionhearted]

i'm finally reading moby dick and there's a lot i didn't know about it such as that the first several dozen chapters are very funny! to me ol Call Me Ishmael has a kind of "what if bertie wooster were 1. american 2. competent" narrative vibe, although admittedly i am what one professor once called an "idiosyncratic" reader, meaning u should not trust anything i say. anyway the book i THOUGHT "moby dick" was going to be doesn't start until captain ahab finally stumps upstairs in chapter 36 and then boy does it ever, because he has I Am In A Tragedy disease and it is contagious and now everyone who was normal two pages ago is monologuing ominously in the dead of night. did you guys know herman melville is a very good writer? have you heard about this? he really knows that if you encounter someone who has you doing soliloquies you should Leave. if you encounter that person while you are on a boat in the middle of the 19th century ocean you are fucked for sure. poor starbuck is out here like "i really would prefer to be in a story about doing my Fucking Job"

[liiionhearted]

i have decision paralysis because the angel and the devil on my shoulders are always fucking each other and they ignore me when i ask for help so i never know what to do

[liiionhearted]

Always weird to see a very confident post declaring that [x] is a homophobic/transphobic/ablest caricature with no basis in reality when you just...actually know multiple people like that.

[liiionhearted]

*booktok voice* Do you want to read a gay story about two guys who speedrun enemies to lovers, go against their designed nature by being together, who become unstoppable fighting side by side to much dismay of the gods who created them? Do you want to see one of them eaten alive by the grief for his lover when he dies from a godsent sickness? A book about someone fighting so hard for a chance at eternal life that he doesn't notice he is throwing away the precious time he has got, filling it with agony? Well, in the  2100 BCE poem of Gilgamesh-

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Actual review

[liiionhearted]

Enough psychoanalysing why people have kinks. We need to psycholanalyse why they don't. Like you don't enjoy getting tied up? Clearly your tumultuous upbringing has given you a patholgical need to be in control at all times. Don't like fauxcest? That's because your petite-bourgeois class background means you view the nuclear family as a pure and sacred institution, automatically reviling anything that undermines or subverts this. Not into piss? That's easy; you're scared of the piss gnomes