lilyofthevxlley

[lilyofthevxlley]

[lilyofthevxlley]

hey cutie you're going to do great today i believe in you~

ooc// Thank you so much!

[lilyofthevxlley]

I wanna apologize for anyone just thinking our activity has gone down! A lot of our members are having familial problems, school things, birthdays, and holiday related things going on right now!

[lilyofthevxlley]

wait todays your birthday? HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUU HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUU HAPY BIRTHDAY DEAR MOOOD HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU and happy cookie day

ooc// Thank you so very much! It is indeed my birthday! <3

[lilyofthevxlley]

Hey lovely hope you're having a great day :) remember youre beautiful aight?

Thank you Santa! You're beautiful yourself~

[lilyofthevxlley]

Hey there lovely~ your theme is really pretty and you are really sweet have a lovely day

Ahhh! Thank you so much Santa!

[lilyofthevxlley]

Extraído do livro Woman-Hating de Andrea Dworkin

[lilyofthevxlley]

your url is lovely and you seem to be an amazing person~

Oh gosh! Thank you so much! <3 

[lilyofthevxlley]

☁

                         ❝I'm kinda numb                               It's so distorted                    You left me here with this damage that you've caused                                              My tortured faces                                                     Those fucked up places                                  In my memories none of them I've lost, but...❞

***

     Momo had never opened up to Nanao about how she was feeling. The depression that had been eating away at her mind, the way it made her feel... she felt terribly. She felt like she had been consumed by something disdainful and left her empty. "Nanao... I need... to tell you something." Momo's hands were shaking so much, the book she had been reading literally fell from the small appendages effortlessly. "It's kinda sick- I feel so dirty... I'm kinda tragic, kinda insecure... But I know that I'm the only one that can fix what ever's wrong I'm sure, but..." Her voice shook violently just as her hands were clenched into fists in her lap. It hurt atrociously to explain to someone as important as Nanao what she was suffering from, but she thought saying depression flat out wouldn't explain her exact feelings.                                                                                  "I feel so alone..." 

Just Go by Staind

[lilyofthevxlley]

—-ஜ۩۞۩ஜ—- His poetry moved her in ways she couldn't explain. She felt sorrow, and multiple different levels of it. It hurt, the pain that arose in her chest and mind with his poetry. The loneliness and the hopelessness that she felt was overwhelming, she actually had to lift her head and stare out the window for a little while. Does he actually... feel this way? I... I want to be his friend for some reason... But I don't know how... She took in a sharp breath and went back to reading for the rest of the class block. 

***

With a shaky hands, the small woman opened a folded piece of notebook paper and started to read in an uneasy voice. 

"It was soft. A throbbing in  Her brain; An open sphere Of detailed and  Absolute pain.

In public- That's when the sadness Feeds off of  The rotten feeling  That grows in her Unexperienced head.

"I love you".  A pixelated message On a plastic screen. He cares about her, He sees right through The tough act.

He messages at random Calling her to see If she's doing okay- Okay when he's  Not around

Lie through your teeth. He doesn't know That his messages of love Make her cry the hardest. Knowing that someone loves her Is the truth that capsizes  The lie she tells herself.

Her chest hurt As she breathed. Inhale. Exhale.  She's not alone. You're not alone.

I love you. She whispers in a sleeping ear. Purity out of a rotten head, She kisses the cheek of What she lives for.

Egotistic epitome Of a sad little girl Staying clear of  The big screen.  You have no one Left to fear."

She quickly refolded her poetry and repocketed it. She was so nervous, yet so proud that she managed to speak to him. She didn't want to be bothering him, but it was fine. She had told her personal limo escort not to come for her until she called him, so she was free until then. "Y-Your poetry... I really liked it. It made me... it shook me, I wanted to cry. I just wanted to stop and scream to someone- something- to get away from me. I was so... I felt so exposed reading your poetry and I... I just wanted to tell you that."

ｍａｄ ｏｂｓｅｓｓｉｏｎ ||Wabiume AU||

It was strange; she actually seemed interested in him and what he was doing.  She also seemed to be interested in what he was writing as well as friendly and not perturbed at all by his silence.  So, he simply handed over one of his many notebooks that were full of poetry and went back to the one he was working on, hoping that it would distract her for the class period at least and leave him in peace.

*************

He heard a voice as he was trudging home, shoulders slumped in defeat and eyes red with purple bags under them.  It was a familiar voice… Ah.  It was her’s.  Why was she so interested in him?  She had no reason to be so; it was obvious that she was from a better off family that his.  One that was probably loving to boot.  So why would she be interested in a kid like him?  One that had barely even talked to her and only had a few classes with her?  One that was dark and brooding, hiding so many secrets from the world?

It interested him.

He turned, nodding at her and waiting for her to catch up before continuing his slow walk down the street and towards his home.  He knew his parents wouldn’t approve, but he didn’t care.  It had been a long time since something had interested him as much as she did, and it was refreshing.  ”Tobiume,” he said softly, his voice still hoarse.  It was both a greeting and a question.  What did she want from him this time?

[lilyofthevxlley]

"I don't care Kira! You- I will do everything for you. I need to do this, Kira. I want this more than... than anything. I want you to be a human and be able to properly court me just like anyone else. I love you Kira, I have to try." The brunette shot up, clenching her fists together with determination. "Izuru Kira you are the absolutely love of my life, I have to try for you, you have to let me. I have more pent up anger and fight in me than most people. I've spent 20 years locked up in here, I'm sure I can do this. Please Kira, you have to let me try." 

Hinamori took a deep breath and looked at him with this look on her face that said it all. "You have to let me try." The aura from her was that of pure determination. Usually she doubted herself with everything, but for some reason, she didn't doubt herself with this. She felt the need to drive herself and tackle the problem at hand. She was in love, and people did crazy things when they were in love. 

"Okay so how do I do this?" She grabbed up the skirt of her dress and sat back down gently. She pat out the wrinkles in the skirt and stayed silent for a moment, letting everything sink in a bit soon. "I love you... so, please? I need to try. I can't love someone else the way I love you. I could marry someone, but I always will think of you... I love you, so you have to let me try."

One Hell of a Butler... For Life --Black Butler AU

The blond knew that she would ask that question.  He knew.  So, he simply shook his head, unable to speak for a moment before taking a deep breath and looking at her.  ”It’s not how I become human.  It’s how you turn me into one,” he said quietly.

"It’s not something easy or fun…  You have to travel down to hell itself.  You have to get past the screams of the dead, the crying people, the monsters, the torture… You have to get through it all with out my help.  All I can do is offer you emotional support, Momo.  I can’t do anything.  And then, you have to walk into the Devil’s palace and take a pomegranate, and feed me the seeds.  After that, I have to take one last order from the man himself, though it can’t be involving you, and then I’ll be human, he’ll set me free."

"But, it’s too dangerous, Momo.  It’s too dangerous.  You would… no, you will die if you try.  We can still be together, if you want to be… just not as humans.  I… I can’t let you get hurt.  It would kill me inside.  And I can’t let you become unhappy for that would be breaking the contract with your parents and cause me to be destroyed or chained in hell forever.  But if you fail and die in hell, your fate will be much worse.  You will be forced to serve the Devil himself for the rest of eternity.  And… he is not a nice man."

[lilyofthevxlley]

He was an American, and for some reason, she wasn't surprised. There was something about him that seemed American. Of course, aside from the difference in accents, there was just something different in their demeanor. Canadians were naturally- or as the stereotypes went- diminutive like she was. "Inspiration? Well... I don't know what inspiration you may find. Here on Price Edward's Island of all places? I love it here, personally... But I didn't know Americans liked this kind of lifestyle. I can call for a truck to get your car, but it won't be until after the storm that's coming in. I'm sorry about that." 

Hinamori smiled at his offer to help her. She wasn't going to turn him down, there was no way she would stop him after all. "If you insist! Also, I guess I just have no reason to doubt you. You helped me out of the warmness in your heart when you saw me struggling." She nodded her head quietly and made her way to the back and put her empty cup away, then came back. "You can help starting tomorrow if you like! Now come on upstairs with me, okay?" She waved him after her as she started up the staircase behind the counter. She led him to a room and opened it up. Inside was a queen sized bed, a dresser, closet, and a desk. "The bathroom is right next to you, then the corner room there is my room. I don't mind when you take a shower or how much water you use, I have my own well. You can use the phone whenever you need to, I don't mind. The only thing I ask is that you leave the door cracked open at night so the warm air from the fire place downstairs can circulate, otherwise it'll get really cold in there."

All I Want for Christmas is You

"Ah yes, I’m sorry.  I forgot to introduce myself.  I"m Izuru Kira," he said softly, looking around once more and then back to her with a small smile.  "And yes, I’m from down south, though I’m not from Canada.  I"m from the United States.  San Francisco, to be exact."  He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.  "I was trying to find some inspiration when my car broke down and… well, you know the rest of that story."

Really, he hadn’t been looking for inspiration.  The blond had been running from his problems yet again.  His family was too much; they expected perfection from him and nothing less.  It was too much pressure for him to deal with.  But, things had taken a turn for the worse once his sister had gotten married and had children. Now, both of his parents were trying to set him up with various women that they found to be acceptable for him, not caring in the least about what he felt for the women they showed him or whether he was even remotely interested in them.  So, he had decided to leave for a while, take a vacation from his family, so to speak.  And the only place they wouldn’t search for him was Canada.  Why would they?  He hated the cold.

At her offer to allow him to stay with her, he raised an eyebrow.  ”Are you sure you want to do that, Ms. Hinamori?  I mean, I didn’t really do much for you and we barely know each other.  Though, if you are going to let me stay, you have to let me help you around the bakery.  As payment for the room.”

[lilyofthevxlley]

((I've never had an OT3 before but honestly, I think KiraHinaHitsu is it.))

[lilyofthevxlley]

Gulp. Of course, he felt negatively regarding the decorations. Taking a deep breath, she let it all out in a heavy sigh as she picked up the chair and moved it back to the table. "I'm sorry, I know you-- we-- agreed not to celebrate the holidays... but they.. well you know how much I love the holidays, Kira. I wait all year to decorate the house and... I'm sorry." the small woman awkwardly started to play finger games with herself so she wouldn't have to look at his face. 

"Momo," he greeted, watching her struggle to put up the lights with a small frown on his face.  He didn’t understand why she loved the holidays so much; they were pointless in his opinion.  Still, he moved over to help with, with a small sigh, and finished placing the lights around the tree for her, keeping her from falling flat on her face from attempting to try such a feat on her own.  "What’s all this?"  He asked,though he already knew the answer.  "I thought we weren’t going to celebrate Christmas."

[lilyofthevxlley]

She heard him, but she didn't at the same time. She didn't have selective hearing, that wasn't it, but her mind chose to pick out one certain thing that the other had said. "You... love me?" He loved her? That was crazy, she couldn't believe him. "Why.... you.. you're only saying that!" She narrowed her eyes, pointing at him angrily. "Why would you suddenly feel that why?! I've felt that way about you for--- god dammit Kira!" She never swore. "I loved you for years- years, Izuru Kira! Years. And you... oh my god the likeness of men. I loved you for so, so long.... I loved you. This is wrong, Kira. You can't do this to me. you can't tell me that as a way to convince me Aizen is a bad guy. You think I don't know that?"

Plot twist. Sosuke Aizen had told her who he was, told her the whole story, and in her blindness, she accepted it. He had told her one day while they were sleeping together, he had explained it to her. He used all the names, he knew the details of who Hisagi was- and she believed it. "Aizen told me, Kira, who he was. He told me what you were doing, he told me all of that. He also told me he loved me, and that you would try doing anything to convince me that he didn't... I... I just never thought you would do this to me, Kira. I can't believe you. I can't believe I loved you. I... I can't believe this." She had tears swelling up in her eyes as she looked at him.

Turning on her heels, she started for the door. Her shoulders shook violently as she reached for the doorknob. "I can't do this anymore, Kira... I can't. I wanted everything with you. I'm only 23 years old, Kira, and a lot of my friends have been married long enough to lose their lover. I can't do this Kira... I wanted to get married and have children with you, I wanted to be dirt poor or wealthy as hell with you- I didn't care. But I..." She choked back, trying not to cry. "I think I hate you now." 

The Night New Orleans Died ||AU||

"I-I… Momo…" the blond sighed, running yet another hand through his hair.  "This has to do with what Shuuhei was doing… What all those nights trying to find a gig really were…"  He tightened her grip on his arm and looked her in the eyes, dead serious.

"He was in a gang," he said, not even bothering to sugar coat the truth.  There was no way to.  It was the simple truth.  Their dearest friend had been in a gang and shooting people, killing them for money.  "When he was killed by the rival gang, they threatened me and I had to join the group that killed him," he spat out the words in hate, the dislike obvious on his face.  "But, they didn’t threaten me.  They threatened you," he continued, his voice becoming softer.  "And, your boyfriend is the leader of the gang that Shuuhei was in.  He’s the reason he died.  He’s why I haven’t been around anymore.  And I’m sorry."

The blue-eyed man took an even deeper breath before spitting out the next bit of truth to his friend.  ”I love you, Momo.  I always have and always will.  I don’t want to see anything bad happen to you, ever.  It would kill me if you got hurt.  But, I can’t make you believe me.  I thought… I thought you should at least know.”  He turned away and released her, staring at the other side of the room.  ”I understand if you hate me; I would hate me too.  But, I do ask that you keep in mind what I’ve told you.  Because he doesn’t care about you, Momo.  You’re protection so that someone… so that I don’t kill him.  You are just a shield to him… I really do love you, Momo.  So much.  Just stay safe and happy.”

[lilyofthevxlley]

Momo went to go visit the grave site of the sweet old man who had adopted her so many years ago. He had a large grave, part of a family mausoleum that Momo knew she would never be privileged enough to be buried with or relatively near him. She stood there, clad in a black dress and a black beret hair on her head, her grey pea coat tightly buttoned to her frame. She hadn't had the chance to come see him in such a long time, and this time, it was very important. 

She knelt down on the ground, gently running her fingers along the engraving into his name. Richard Marcus Matthews. She smiled once she finished the tracing, then went on to talk to him. "Papa... I wanted to tell you I'm pregnant... it... It's Kira's baby- do you remember me telling you about Kira? You... you met him in the hospital before you died, remember Papa? I'm married to him now... we couldn't afford a ceremony or anything, so you... you didn't miss out on anything. We're going to have a baby though, Papa! We aren't struggling anymore, I'm just... I'm so happy now Papa- everything-- Kira and I will be okay." 

Glancing up, she heard foot steps behind her. She smiled, then looked back at the coffin, "I brought Kira with me today Papa. I know I didn't bring him to your funeral, but I brought him today Papa." She nodded and waved Kira over to the coffin, which she pat on it to indicate which one it was she was talking to. 

***

The work wasn't that hard. Momo pushed herself to reach above and beyond what the expected for this wedding. In a way, it made her said however, because she never had one of her own. She however, compromised with herself that she was going to work hard as if this was her own wedding. As time passed, her stomach grew in size as the time of the wedding approached slowly. She was happy as she grew in size, it even got to the point where she could balance small plates on her stomach holding the different tips of icing tubes. While cooking one day, Momo felt the baby kick for the first time, and she literally ropped the plates she was holding and called for Kira. "K-Kira! Kira hurry! I-- I just felt the baby kick for the first time! Kira!"

Sweet Coffee And You

The male actually sat down and began to cry when his wife called him, telling him the good news.  ”Everything’s going to be alright.  Everything will be okay.  The baby will be okay.  He or she will have a good life,” he whispered into the phone, relief flooding through him.

Though he would never admit it, he had been concerned as to how they would afford a child of their own.  He knew that they really couldn’t, but he would do anything to make sure that it made its way into the world and survived.  Even if it involved him never sleeping or eating.  But, now it seemed as if everything would be alright.  It finally seemed like things were turning for the better, that things would be alright.  He was so relieved that as soon as he was off work, he ran home, picked up Momo in his arms, and took her to their bedroom, kissing every part of her he could reach until they both fell asleep exhausted.

**************

He woke up the next morning feeling better than he had in months, kissing his lover awake and smiling at her as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes.  His hands went to her bare stomach, gently feeling the very small bump that was beginning to show.

*************

A few weeks later, the shop was busier than ever.  It was time to begin making the order for the wedding as well as helping out the normal customers.  However, that wasn’t the main cause.  It seemed that their advertising had finally paid off because now new clients were pouring in every day, either making requests for parties or becoming regulars.  They were making so much money that Kira was even able to quit his job at the bar.  They had never been so busy but happy.

[lilyofthevxlley]

"Maybe I should have never gone to see him, Kira. Maybe I… maybe I should of told someone, let someone talk me out of it. I’m just… I don’t feel right about this." She nodded her head slowly as he rested there on her shoulder. She felt terrible, like something was eating away at her, had poisoned her brain through the eyes- just by seeing, hearing his voice. "I'm sorry Kira..."

"Tell me what you want me to say." -Kira

(I love this song so much I’m basing my reply off of it as much as I possibly can!)

actually for raiseyourheadinshame

The brunette turned to look back at the blonde, a twisted look of guilt on her face. Would you leave me if I told you what I’ve done? She was a terrible person. How could she come to realization? She was still in love with Aizen, it was still there in her heart, yet she loved this man before her like the moon loves the sun. Choking back her tears, she replied as simply as she could- to start. “You are the hole in my head, you are the space in my bed, you are the silence in between what I thought and what I said. You are the night-time fear, you are the morning when it’s clear. When it’s over your the start- you’re my head, you’re my heart…” Brunette hair fluttered loose from being safely tucked behind her ear. Squeezing her small hands together at her chest, she grimaced as she continued on. “And it’s a conversation I just can’t have tonight…” Would you leave me if I told you what I’ve become?