🌱 littjara, they/them, adult 🧪 simic sultai 🦎 wotc new perspectives grant '23 🦠
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the way people view my race in america has made it so very hard to distance myself from femininity
i could do anything to my body and still be viewed as a small, cute asian girl
really fks me up that people think it's okay to tell others who obviously have a poor relationship w femininity that they look feminine and will always look cute no matter what
v not ok
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Ok breaking containment for this one because I need everyone who will listen to hear this.
Women who suffer bad cramps are told cramps shouldn't affect school/work/etc, but no one ever investigates further because no one can possibly know if what someone experiences is just typical pain or something much worse.
Well after 15 years of stage 4 treatment-resistant endometriosis that came with pain as bad as, if not worse than, actual labor contractions every month, all the while being told I was 'typical' and 'just had bad cramps', I've finally been healed (another post for another time). I have had what everyone describes as the elusive 'normal period pain' for several months now, and I am begging you to look me in the eyes and listen because I need everyone who can hear this to hear this.
I have been on both sides of this. I have the hard-earned knowledge of what a period 'should' feel like.
If you have to put in any effort to hide your cramps, you need to get help.
Even during of the PEAK OF CRAMPING (i.e., as bad as your cramps possibly get), you should still be able to stand, speak, walk, eat, work, and sleep with no problems. These tasks should require very-little-to-no extra effort beyond what you would normally do when you aren't on your period. When you do these things, you should feel grumpy and a little bit icky and maybe a twinge of nerves and NOTHING MORE.
If you have to sit in the corner and hope no one approaches you because you can't speak or stand without showing pain, even slightly, you need to get help. If your pain is showing on your face, you need to get help. And most importantly, IF YOUR PAIN DOES NOT RESPOND TO 1-2 TYLENOL OR IBUPROFEN, YOU NEED TO GET HELP.
Your period cramps should make you grumpy. Your period cramps should make you feel a little icky and tired. Your period cramps should make you feel your insides existing/moving a bit and a twinge of nerves that makes you groan slightly then the "pain" should stop there, NOTHING MORE.
If your cramps put you on the floor but you make believe you're the captain of a ship who has just been stabbed and has to hide it to fight on, and you force yourself to power through the day, please understand: you are not okay, that does not make you okay. Just because you can power through the pain doesn't mean you aren't sick. If you have to force yourself through any basic task beyond the effort it takes you to do when you aren't on your period, and I am holding your face and looking you in the eye as I say this because I need you to hear me: You aren't normal. You don't 'just have bad cramps'. You are sick and you need to get help.
Now most people will tell you if your cramps are beyond a 3 out of 10 on the pain scale, you should see a doctor. While this is usually true, you have to consider chronic pain CAN AND WILL BREAK YOUR PAIN SCALE. Most people will only compare pain they currently feel to pain they may experience one day but probably never will. "Sure these cramps feel bad now, but if I had a leg amputated with no anesthesia, that would hurt WAY worse, so this pain can't be that bad-" No. Your pain is what it is, objectively, full stop. My cramps were at a 10 out of 10 every. Single. Time. And nobody told me claiming they were a 6-8 because I thought to myself 'what if I lose a limb one day?' was completely wrong. 10 pain is 10 pain. And if there's something that hurts worse than that, guess what. The thing you are experiencing right now is still a 10 out of 10 on the pain scale. Just because you experience it every month doesn't mean it's magically not as bad is it is. And if your pain is worse than a 3 out of 10, you need to get help.
Now when I say get help, I mean find the root cause of your pain. You can't just throw drugs and hormones at it without knowing what it causing your pain. Endometriosis, fibroids, pcos, cancer, adenomyosis, polyps, thyroid issues, there is always a cause. And if you leave it untreated, it will grow and get worse to the point where it resists treatment and the drugs and hormones you've been throwing at it for years don't work anymore. You have to find a doctor that will investigate. If your doctor tells you you 'just have bad cramps' get a new doctor. I know you've been told that but please hear me: no one ever just has bad cramps. A healthy human body doesn't spontaneously cause itself pain so bad you can't stand up; there is ALWAYS a cause.
I was sick for more than 15 years. My entire life was put on hold and now I'm in my late 20s trying desperately to play catch up for everything I missed. I want to pick up 12yo me, spin her around, and tell her she doesn't have to die before she finally stops hurting. I don't want anyone to suffer the same fate I did simply because everyone told them they were normal. A little twinge of pain here and there is normal, suffering is not. I promise you your pain is real, it is not normal, and dear heavenly day I am begging you you need to get help now.
TL;DR: There is no such thing as 'just bad cramps.' If you feel anything more than grumpy, icky, and pain greater than a 3 out of 10, you need to find out what's wrong with you before it gets worse.
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EOE got me doing this fr

I need somewhere to vent out the absolutely feral energy that today's episodes of Edge of Eternities have given me because OHHHHHHH MY GOD THEY'RE SO FUCKING PEAK
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I need somewhere to vent out the absolutely feral energy that today's episodes of Edge of Eternities have given me because OHHHHHHH MY GOD THEY'RE SO FUCKING PEAK
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I have to say, Edge of Eternities story is a hell of a thing to read coming right off of Deltarune chapters 3 and 4.

#THE THEMES OF CHOICE IN THE FACE OF AN INEVITABLE ENDING... THE PLAYER AS AN ENTITY THE STORY IS AWARE OF#AUGH.#mtg#magic the gathering#edge of eternities#deltarune#utdr
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This was so good!! EOE in general has been nothing but bangers, but this one especially (and it's looking to be extremely plot important).
The ending had my jaw on the FLOOR please read it
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the writing for edge of eternities is so good i'm gonna explode
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how many nonbinary people have come out publicly only to then semi re-closet themselves because people are so incapable of not being extremely exorsexist towards them immediately... ive seen this happen to nonbinary people across agab we cannot catch a damn break
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folk creating long-time Gaster fanworks, hold my hand and repeat after me:
if canon ends up contradicting my work, it does not make my work any less valuable, fun or valid
i do not need to bend my work to fit the new canon, even if I tried to be canon-compliant to this point
i do not need to abandon my work. it can be wonderful and amazing even if it ends up being an AU
i can finish my story/work how I wanted it to go without feeling guilty, and I can still enjoy the new canon in its fullest, and these two don't contradict each other
and most importantly,
anyone who tries to make me feel bad about my work after the release of ch3+4 based of how 'canon' it is shall be FLUNG INTO THE SUN
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reminder that "allies welcome" was once secret code for "those not out yet can still participate without putting themselves at risk", and for those who aren't out yet to comfortably exist in these spaces you have to let allies exist in those spaces too.
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Looking forward to the part where Sami beats us with a hockey stick
Have to say, I absolutely adore the Deltarune shit that Magic story is on this time. This is exactly the level of weird I wanted going in and I am not disappointed
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INTRIGUED by the Xenomorph-esque monsters that the people of the Edge seem to think slivers are
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Have to say, I absolutely adore the Deltarune shit that Magic story is on this time. This is exactly the level of weird I wanted going in and I am not disappointed
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Having experienced a lot of it in my 20s, I think some of the worst, pettiest, most straight up this-is-just-bullying-you're-passing-off-as-praxis incidences of Queer Infighting endemic to young people can be best understood as attempts to exercise power by people with very little power.
Like you're 22, you're queer, you've just become a Marxist, the scope of World Suck is overwhelming and you have $30 in your bank account. What can you do to feel like you have any power? Well, you can try to get your frenemy cancelled for cosplaying a character from a problematic show. You can write a public callout post over someone's obviously friendly use of a slur you don't think they technically have the right to reclaim. Doing this stuff can make you feel like you have power and your actions have an impact. Unfortunately the impact in question is a negative impact on other marginalized people. But that often takes some maturity and self-reflection to notice.
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When the new plane Duskmourn was announced, I was skeptical. (A plane is a house? Does it even make sense?) It turned out to be one of my favorites.
When the next new setting is announced, I think I will scream in joy, just like I'm doing now about the Edge. Please send high fives to the people working on the unannounced new setting.
Will do.
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Only in Deltarune can your favorite character directly acknowledge you 🫵 specifically, the player of this specific run of the game by stuffing you in a cardboard box, beating you with a hockey stick, hurling you into the garbage and violently kicking the shit out of you. First ever blorbo to despise me personally. Incredible experience, no notes. I hope they put me in the garbage disposal next chapter, or perhaps the air fryer.
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