lizzyllama-blog - Tumblr blog

[lizzyllama-blog]

embarassing story: once i accidentally tore off a tag and didn’t have tape with me (this was before I figure out that I could just disrupt the signal, dah) so I just. swallowed it. I ate the the fucking RFID

[lizzyllama-blog]

This was the thing I was talking about in o/ld n/avy… is this a light fixture or a weird camera? Anyone know?

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[lizzyllama-blog]

Can I just throw in: I’m a girl from a poor family who steals essentials AND luxuries. My life sucks, you can’t make me feel guilty for treating myself and wiping away the pain with temporary things that make me feel happy and good about myself. I choose me. No one else ever did. But I DO. Deal with it.

[lizzyllama-blog]

Literally there was a scene where a character went out of her way to steal something, explaining her actions with an iconic "we're bad guys, it's what we do"

“Don’t drag Suicide Squad, a movie about serial killer villains, into your petty crime blog.”

where is the logic in this.

[lizzyllama-blog]

food should be free.

until such a society exists under which food is free, the shoplifting of food from retail establishments is morally and ethically permissible behavior.  

[lizzyllama-blog]

My probiotics. You can get probiotics for cheap, but they have very few active cultures in them, but the ones I got now are so nice and I'm doing so much better now. The bottle was $50.

i’m curious.

so i love my wet n wild comfort zone eye palette. it’s only $5 but the shadow quality is phenomenal and the colors honestly just speak to me. this is a shoutout my custom buxom eyeshadow palette and honestly just looking at it makes me so happy. this color story is beautiful to me

what’s your favorite shoplifted item?

[lizzyllama-blog]

I feel this ugh, I just want to hang out with all of you.

I know two lifters irl but they are just too sloppy for me to go with them anymore (One took a candle she knew was tagged, didn't detag, then when she beeped she turned around walked back in, and HANDED THE CANDLE TO THE SA)

Legit the idea of lifting with someone who has my back and isn't horrifyingly sloppy is a dream I swear.

man i wish this whole lifting thing wasn’t so risky because like?? I wish I could meet y’all and have long talks in person abt lifting and go take stores by storm together but there’s no safe way to do so bc we’re literally criminals who have to hide our identities bc we don’t know for sure who’s roleplaying, who’s a narc, etc. like man i wish i could find more lifters in my area but god knows there’s no safe way to do that without compromising my identity and my safety

[lizzyllama-blog]

So true omg, I know a couple lifters irl but they are just too sloppy it drives me crazy. (One of them took a candle she knew was tagged, then when she beeped she turned around and HANDED THE CANDLE TO THE SA)

man i wish this whole lifting thing wasn’t so risky because like?? I wish I could meet y’all and have long talks in person abt lifting and go take stores by storm together but there’s no safe way to do so bc we’re literally criminals who have to hide our identities bc we don’t know for sure who’s roleplaying, who’s a narc, etc. like man i wish i could find more lifters in my area but god knows there’s no safe way to do that without compromising my identity and my safety

[lizzyllama-blog]

I purposefully walk a little extra slow when exiting a store so as to not draw attention to myself

LIFTING 101: How to Look, How to Act

Sorry guys, this is a long one!

BIGGEST TIP: Act as if you have the full intention of buying something: Convince yourself that you are in fact about to spend your hard earned money. Look at prices, look at sizes. Do you see a sale rack? Gravitate towards it as if you are keen on getting the best deal. Just picture how you act when you are actually planning on buying things and mimic that.

Smile!! Act friendly!: This is another big one. Store associates usually don’t suspect the ones who look as if they didn’t have it in them to steal anything, and on the off chance that you do get caught, always act nice, innocent and apologetic. If you display to the SAs that you are a clean cut, nice, rich person that they are much less likely to follow or suspect you, and are more likely to be more lenient if you get caught.

Light, clean makeup (unless going to Sephora or Ulta): This also relates to the tip mentioned above. You don’t want to draw any attention to yourself. You do not want to have dark, gothic make up or bright colored eyeshadow or anything like that when you are lifting. You want to keep your look as clean and boring as possible.

Wear hair away from face: This seems counterintuitive but I’ve personally noticed a difference regarding this. SAs will be more wary of someone who has heavy bangs or hair in their face. By pulling your hair back into a high ponytail or plain headband you are silently saying “Hey, I have no problem showing my face. I’m confident.” Remember, the goal is not to exit the store without being apprehended. The goal is to leave without anyone even knowing something has been taken. Therefore, if you have done your job, there should be no risk if your face is fully exposed.

No statement accessories: Again, you do not want to bring any unnecessary attention to yourself. No cat earrings, no chunky necklaces, NO LOUD BRACELETS, no patterned tights. Outfits that I usually wear to go lifting (in the warmer months) are a pair of skinny jeans (rolled up to right above the ankle), black leather flip flops, a cream blouse, and a thin gold necklace. You want to look put together, but not flashy.

Wear clothing that is in season and tight!: This will help keep you from standing out or being suspected. If you’re carrying a small bag and wearing fitted clothes, where could you possibly be hiding anything? If you go into a Walmart wearing a huge sweatshirt in the middle of the summer, the employees will already have a reason to suspect that you may be a shoplifter so make sure you don’t give them a reason to pay attention to you.

Don’t carry a large bag (tote can be fine, try and invest in a bag that is much bigger on the inside than it looks from the outside): Get a cute bag that looks small. I have this purple Kate Spade purse that looks very small from the outside but I’ve fitted 3 books, 4 pairs of leggings, a t shirt, and 3 bras inside all while having it still look normal from the outside. Huge bags draw attention, but you can probably get away with carrying a large tote bag so long as it looks expensive and/or has a brand name prominently displayed.

Wear accessories on only one hand to draw attention to it, use the other hand to take and conceal (works best for concealing small items): The eye is drawn to sparkly things! Wear rings and paint the nails a bright color on only one hand. Use this hand to pick up and put back items that you aren’t going to lift; use the other boring hand to discreetly take items and slip them into your bag. If all goes well, even if someone is watching you, their eyes will be drawn to the flashier hand.

Don’t take quick glances around at people and/or cameras: This makes you look very VERY SUS. This has been said a million times and I can’t stress this enough but look for cameras ONLY with your eyes! Don’t move your head, don’t quickly whip around if you hear a sound. Movement draws attention, which is exactly what we don’t want. If you hear someone walking behind you as you’re concealing, stay calm and act as if you are doing nothing out of the ordinary. You must convince yourself that you aren’t doing anything wrong so as to convince others watching you of the same.

Act calmly, don’t fidget, consciously slow your movements: If you are a person who acts strangely when nervous, YOU SHOULD NOT BE LIFTING. I cannot stress this enough; the most important defense you have against being sus is your demeanor! Radiate tranquility babes, if that means taking a bubble bath right before lifting do it! Don’t walk too quickly, don’t jump, don’t fidget with your hands.

Don’t spend too much time handling the item you’re planning on lifting: This just gives LP more time to see you with that piece of merchandise and more time for them to become suspicious of what you’re planning on doing with it, especially if they see you leave the store without buying it!! Take the item, and conceal as soon as you possibly can.

And that’s all for now! Hopefully something here helped someone, these are all pretty general but they’re good especially for people who are just starting out! Shoot me a message if you have any questions and I’ll try to answer them as best I can!

[lizzyllama-blog]

Yes

We need a secret code or something

Let’s come up with some kind of secret code to say to someone that we meet in person, if we want to know if they’re a lifter and if they know what we’re talking about, they’ll answer our question with a specific answer.

[lizzyllama-blog]

lmfao tfw i switch from my sexwork blog to my knitting/crochet blog to my lifting blog and get confused by each definition/use of the word “hook/hooker” by each interest

[lizzyllama-blog]

Tbh for me I befriend the SA. Joke with them, talk, ask questions, then politely be like "I'm going to just explore and smell basically all your products now lol" and 9/10 they'll be super sweet and leave you the fuck alone. They're like lush in the fact that they are supposed to CS you to death (mine are, anyways), so you have to be ready.

Also lift their hemp hand protector, it's the best hand lotion. I hate the smell of patchouli oil but I still adore it.

Anyone got tips for the body shop?

Acnes a bitch, need a fuck load of tea tree

[lizzyllama-blog]

Do you ever just look at the workers of a store like,

Wow, you people are really bad at your job.

[lizzyllama-blog]

I love lifting because even if I don’t score anything, or I get sussed and ditch, or I only get one thing, or even when I got caught, it’s all helping me level up. I’m getting better each time, and honing my skills is super thrilling. Free stuff, not having to support evil companies, and reduced financial stress is a really sick bonus. 

[lizzyllama-blog]

Bake her at 350° until the bitch burns off

Pissed off right now

My boyfriend’s sister, who I’ve gifted a good hundred of dollars of stolen shit in a day (no, she didn’t even say thank you once to me) was freaking out at my boyfriend because I asked him to ask if I could borrow a fucking NAIL polish. And she apparently was complaining about how she doesn’t want me using her shit (funny, because she has personally DONE my nails.) So I gave her free shit, she didn’t say thank you, and now she won’t let me borrow her nail polish. I could have boosted that wallet for money.

Basically, I am having no qualms about fucking her up when given half the chance.

[lizzyllama-blog]

Office max is a beautiful store and I put 99% of it in my bag

The “Mini Mall” haul

Its weird that ive gotten a bad habit to lift every time i go out. I think i am going to force myself to stop for a bit because i dont want this to become an addiction and for my own safety.

💀Hotopic💀 •Melanie Martinez necklace-$10.90 •black choker-$6.50 •Ying Yang necklace-$8.50

🦄Claires'🦄 •pusheen beanie-$16.99

☠️Spencer's☠️ •incense holder-$12.99

🛠Office Max 🛠 •Skullcandy earbuds-$19.99

🔮Total Savings🔮-$75.87

So this was the first time lifting at office max and i was so confused because i didnt see any cameras and there were only two employees working at the time. I would like to hear other people’s experiences.