lizzyparadisx

[lizzyparadisx]

lost in your current like a priceless wine. ⚜️🍷

[lizzyparadisx]

I am keeping a secret. I am sucking on it like a lozenge that just won’t get smaller. I am passing it back and forth between my teeth, like a ball on a field between the legs of a bored player. It is not a happy secret, like a diamond in a velvet box in a sweaty pocket. It’s a secret like a loaded gun sewn into the lining of my sweater’s hood, aimed directly for the back of my head. It is a cartoon piano suspended above me. It is a manhole threatening to spontaneously collapse beneath my feet. It is a cloud of noxious gas meticulously attached to only the molecules I misguidedly breathe. It is in my shadow, and it singes the concrete where I stand. It is the sad clink of an empty glass on New Year’s Eve. It is a nap in the passenger seat from which I will never wake up. I am keeping a secret. I am hoarding it. You will find it amongst yellowed mountains of books in a garage, when you find me. This is not a promise, it is a confession. I am keeping a secret.

[lizzyparadisx]

think i’ll miss you forever

[lizzyparadisx]

you’re on your own, kid

[lizzyparadisx]

it is 2 a.m. and i'm on my wildest dreams. thinking about his lips on mine don't feel enough anymore: i need to feel them. this insatiable appetite is out of this world (just like him). by the way, just splashed wine all over me.

[lizzyparadisx]

i desire him more than i should but touch him less than i would

[lizzyparadisx]

i remember when i first met him and thought we were gonna last forever: his lips felt like home even though we were so damn drunk. i fell for him as he fell in his drugs. i was addicted to him. he was addicted (not to me). the day before was spent entirely in a lust hangover wondering what was it going to be seeing his face again. he had all the traits: hair, lips, body – everything in him seemed perfect. and six months later, my fairytale continues: he never loved me back, he likes other guys, he never saw the potential in me, which made love myself even more. now, i'm ready to get free. i will always love him, but we were never meant to be together. and that's fine.

[lizzyparadisx]

all roads that lead to you as integral to me as arteries that get the blood flowing straight to the heart