look-inside-my-mind

[look-inside-my-mind]

I was gonna play pokemon, but instead I'm here

do you ever sabotage your own free time? like wtf is that about? i want to play this game or read or do something specific but instead i will just stare out the window or scroll mindlessly???

[look-inside-my-mind]

I'm addicted

I'm addicted to caffeine

Because I struggled in high school

That's really what it boils down to

When my depression took over

And my anxiety kept me up

I felt defeated and I couldn't go on

I turned to all kinda of substances

But my one constant was coffee

I tried to destroy myself so many times

I needed to let go

In order to heal

(That what my therapist said anyway)

So I took what I could

Now I ache and groan everytime I move

I feel like a tree

My past is clear in my rings

I know it,

The wind breezes past

My long limbs sway with me

Hmmmm

I need to take that next step

It all hurts too much

I think about the times I made mistakes

That's what I call boys with drugs

I think about my husband

He is the opposite of a mistake

My straightedge baby

I wake every morning and make him coffee

Like it's not one of my coping mechanisms

It's not something I've used to self medicate

I lie to myself everymorning

I'm great at lying

I can't lie to him

[look-inside-my-mind]

My favorite place in the entire universe

Your arms tight around me

Your breath in my ear

Your cock throbbing between my legs

My god!

I finally understand 'of one flesh'

I writh between your gasp for air

I can't let you pull away from me

I love you my god

Who knows what is out there

Who cares how we got here

Who am I compared to you

The god I worship

[look-inside-my-mind]

Dude, you’re embarrassing me in front of the wizards.

[look-inside-my-mind]

V A C C I N A T E

[look-inside-my-mind]

How did i fall in love?

He is pure in that sexy bad boy way

He is funny with bad puns and musical laugh

He knows me understands and remembers all little details

He is dangerous while following rules worrying about me

He is nerdy video games, anime the smartest cookie

He loves me I love him This feels incredible

I dont know what to do but i am certain of you

[look-inside-my-mind]

Oh i bet you seduce all the girls with your awkward dancing and nerdy carreer choice. Bring ‘em back to your place and show them what a dork you are. Keep the party rocking by giving them examples of your weirdness

[look-inside-my-mind]

Date an artist

Date a poet, a musician, an artist Some one who sees beauty in all things Someone who can hear every subtle change in your voice and will go on and on describing the sound they hear when you laugh Someone you knows and is fascinated with every detail of your face, every curve of your body Someone who can string together the most perfect sentences to describe your soul Date some one whose only solution to pull them out a art form they have dedicated themselves to is to be captivated by you Be a muse and you will never feel so known

[look-inside-my-mind]

I wish life wasn't complicated Actually I wish we had met now Not so long ago Years ago life was complicated We were dumb kids Trying to make sense of nonsense Everything is so simple now Everything would be perfect now The complications of the past Made it difficult to last If we had met today If I had saw you on the bus You had the courage to say hi If we had met today We'd be perfect

[look-inside-my-mind]

Neither one of us wanted the other but we were teenagers in the middle of summer with nothing better to do

[look-inside-my-mind]

[look-inside-my-mind]

the best thing that ever happened to me in high school was about 6 years ago our teacher never showed up for class and neither did the sub so one of the guys in the class just got up and started discussing his various theories about the island in lost and started drawing different diagrams on the board and ranting about his fan theories and everybody just went with it and raised their hands for him like he was the teacher and that was the class. 

[look-inside-my-mind]

THIS ONE TIME A KID IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD WAS LATE GETTING HOME BECAUSE HE WAS BUYING DRUGS SO HE TOLD HIS MOM HE GOT KIDNAPPED AND SHE MADE HIM REPORT IT TO THE POLICE AND HE DESCRIBED THE KIDNAPPER AS COUNT OLAF AND THEN THIS HAPPENED

[look-inside-my-mind]

okay but

fuck your stereotypes

long hair is not “girly”

the same way short hair is not “manly”

hair has no gender

hair is just hair

&as long as you’re not disrespecting a culture with the way you do it

you keep on doing you

[look-inside-my-mind]

What did you learn today lizz?

Today I learned you should not talk to a platonic friend about their love life after reading a shit ton of hardcore smut

[look-inside-my-mind]

A small giggle escapes these lips

The ones once pressed onto yours

They stretch into a smile

Though it’s my muscles that move me

It’s you that controls them

  Guiding my body with your hands

Fingers dancing across my bare skin

Fiddling with the hem on my shirt

And the buttoning of my pants

A hand groping the inner thigh

  Mind racing and heart beating

Thoughts become blurred

Sounds and rhythms become one

Is it your heart beating I feel in my chest?

So close yet I still need you closer

  Lips trembling with anticipation

Bodies gliding as a current

Spirits connect and souls collide

Happiness last but just a moment

Reflection helps in the dark unless you are far from a light

[look-inside-my-mind]

so i guess i wrote a thing or something

I walked from the bathroom toward the bed. I lie down and realize something is wrong. Pants! This morning the material was snug and comfortable. Now they are constricting and itchy. I peeled them off and snuggled into my pillow. Something was still weird in the room. I couldn’t tell if she was asleep or not. She is on her stomach, facing away from me. So I turn over away from her. I was challenging myself to not touch her. Not drape myself over her. I don’t even know why I was doing it. Within a second she was in my ear asking the same thing I was. I roll over to face her directly. Her right arm slides over my waist pulling me closer to her. I wrap my leg around her.

 She kisses me and butterflies aren’t just in my stomach, they are racing through my veins. I push her onto her back and straddle her. Both of her hands are now on my waist. I kiss her, she bites my tongue and I bite her lip. Her hands steadily move up my back, pulling my shirt up with them. Both hands were at my shoulder blades I sit up, still on top of her. I rip off my shirt and go back to making out. She moves her mouth toward my neck. My back arches as a reflex. my hands move towards her waist and I move my knees apart so I am supported by my feet instead of knees. I start pulling at her pants. She stops me.

      “We have company, remember,” she purrs.

Oh! I flop onto my back next to her. They’ll be gone in the morning, I think to myself, while rolling over to my side. Her hand finds its way to my hip and slides down my outer thigh. She nuzzles her face into my hair and moves her body in close to mine.

I wake up to her beaming face and a cup of coffee