lookingcoolakira

[lookingcoolakira]

persona 5 royal, but in which akira is self-aware. aware that he is a puppet on a string bound by another human of some other realm. he notices there are times in the day where he is alone, empty, with nothing controlling him, like in the mornings or afternoons while he is at school. during other times, however, he has no control over his own existence. he opens his phone to see text messages from ann, ryuji and yusuke. he wants to give yusuke some space after everything he's been through. he wants to see ann because she's been lonely. his fingers type a reply to yusuke instead. he listens to what his friend has to say, but he only has two or three thoughts in his head to say in response. none of them sound like something he would say on his own, but yusuke seems happy enough. they are closer than ever before.

akira wants to do his own thing in the evenings. he'd rather be alone after that very stressful experience. but yet again, he is taking a train to kichijoji, only to have akechi say he is busy and can't see him. akira walks away and watches akechi stand outside for hours, never moving. he chooses to play darts with other people, yet he is not throwing of his own accord. he has never played before. how does he get a perfect score? he does not want a relationship with his own teacher. he is too young to even think about it. yet he finds himself accepting, even though that is the last thing he wants.

he is aware that in the metaverse, the control over him tightens to unbearable levels. he can't even move my himself, being dragged along by fate as he attacks shadow after shadow, even when his injured body is being dragged along by this mysterious force. he gets struck by a shadow. he feels his body falling. of course he's angry that he died, there is so much that needs to be done in the world, but he is free from that demon at last. maybe his next life will be his own, he'll be in control like he was before he moved go yongen-jaya for a year.

he opens his eyes in a saferoom. he hears queen talking with oracle about their next move. they had this conversation before, way back before joker began to get so reckless. crow looks at him strangely. no one else notices. before joker can say anything, he is being dragged towards the door, and everything begins again.

[lookingcoolakira]

persona 5 royal, but in which akira is self-aware. aware that he is a puppet on a string bound by another human of some other realm. he notices there are times in the day where he is alone, empty, with nothing controlling him, like in the mornings or afternoons while he is at school. during other times, however, he has no control over his own existence. he opens his phone to see text messages from ann, ryuji and yusuke. he wants to give yusuke some space after everything he's been through. he wants to see ann because she's been lonely. his fingers type a reply to yusuke instead. he listens to what his friend has to say, but he only has two or three thoughts in his head to say in response. none of them sound like something he would say on his own, but yusuke seems happy enough. they are closer than ever before.

akira wants to do his own thing in the evenings. he'd rather be alone after that very stressful experience. but yet again, he is taking a train to kichijoji, only to have akechi say he is busy and can't see him. akira walks away and watches akechi stand outside for hours, never moving. he chooses to play darts with other people, yet he is not throwing of his own accord. he has never played before. how does he get a perfect score? he does not want a relationship with his own teacher. he is too young to even think about it. yet he finds himself accepting, even though that is the last thing he wants.

he is aware that in the metaverse, the control over him tightens to unbearable levels. he can't even move my himself, being dragged along by fate as he attacks shadow after shadow, even when his injured body is being dragged along by this mysterious force. he gets struck by a shadow. he feels his body falling. of course he's angry that he died, there is so much that needs to be done in the world, but he is free from that demon at last. maybe his next life will be his own, he'll be in control like he was before he moved go yongen-jaya for a year.

he opens his eyes in a saferoom. he hears queen talking with oracle about their next move. they had this conversation before, way back before joker began to get so reckless. crow looks at him strangely. no one else notices. before joker can say anything, he is being dragged towards the door, and everything begins again.

[lookingcoolakira]

i wonder how the incident in the engine room would have gone if joker wasn't a puppet bound by the player. i wonder what his true feelings were, rather than the feelings of the player. would he have sat outside of the door for hours until one of them pulled him to his feet? would he have punched and kicked at the wall even though he knew it was a hopeless endeavour? or would he still have turned away, stone-faced, to continue the job that akechi asked of him?

i wonder whether the reality of the situation would only kick in once he had escaped from the palace. where his text messages would remain unanswered, where his friends would nervously dart around the topic. i wonder what he would truly be feeling before he went to sleep. whether he sincerely remembered his promise and went to sleep, or whether he sat up for hours staring at the glove and waiting for a rest that never came.

[lookingcoolakira]

i wonder how the incident in the engine room would have gone if joker wasn't a puppet bound by the player. i wonder what his true feelings were, rather than the feelings of the player. would he have sat outside of the door for hours until one of them pulled him to his feet? would he have punched and kicked at the wall even though he knew it was a hopeless endeavour? or would he still have turned away, stone-faced, to continue the job that akechi asked of him?

i wonder whether the reality of the situation would only kick in once he had escaped from the palace. where his text messages would remain unanswered, where his friends would nervously dart around the topic. i wonder what he would truly be feeling before he went to sleep. whether he sincerely remembered his promise and went to sleep, or whether he sat up for hours staring at the glove and waiting for a rest that never came.

[lookingcoolakira]

i wonder how the incident in the engine room would have gone if joker wasn't a puppet bound by the player. i wonder what his true feelings were, rather than the feelings of the player. would he have sat outside of the door for hours until one of them pulled him to his feet? would he have punched and kicked at the wall even though he knew it was a hopeless endeavour? or would he still have turned away, stone-faced, to continue the job that akechi asked of him?

i wonder whether the reality of the situation would only kick in once he had escaped from the palace. where his text messages would remain unanswered, where his friends would nervously dart around the topic. i wonder what he would truly be feeling before he went to sleep. whether he sincerely remembered his promise and went to sleep, or whether he sat up for hours staring at the glove and waiting for a rest that never came.

[lookingcoolakira]

oh the beauty of your first playthrough

seeing a friend play the game blind for the first time has been incredible to me as their reactions and commentary bring back every memory of my first playthrough

the will of rebellion. the anguish of manipulation. new friends and allies. the betrayal of akechi, his redemption and an end that could not be met there. the 3rd semester where everything starts to fall apart. the grief of a sister that led to crisis. the decision between the world as a whole or the one person who you need the most.

seeing individuals grow as human beings because of the game, developing independence, confidence, kindness. that is persona 5 royal. no game is quite as beautiful as that.

[lookingcoolakira]

dana. 20. 9/9. if you know my other account, no you don't~

back in my persona 5 royal stage. i thought i was free. i never was.