loudmagpie

[loudmagpie]

I hate the term straight passing honestly because it turned gayness into a “look” or an “aesthetic” which is what we’re trying to break away from. I’m pretty feminine and conform to gender standards with long hair, feminine clothing, basically the whole thing. I’ve been in gay majority friend groups before and they’d always shit on me for being “straight passing” because of my appearance. It’s made me wonder if people are starting to view being gay as an aesthetic now? I’ve never dated a guy or claimed to like one so there’s no other reason for them to call me that. It’s also not a secret that I’m a lesbian I just don’t mention it often. I’m just wondering if anyone else has noticed how being gay is turning into a sort of “aesthetic” for boring people who have to use labels to be considered interesting.

[loudmagpie]

I had been a staunch "TRA" for years and believed whole heartedly all of the modern queer gender theory.

But being someone who liked debating, I decided I'd finally look into the evil TERFs everyone was always talking about and making into public enemy n.1, so that I can see for myself how ridiculous their rethoric is and get to know their arguments to rebuttle them in the future.

Right off the bat, the more I read, the more I thought to myself "Wait a minute, they're actually kind of making sense??... I don't know how to argue against this?..."

I'd go back to "my" side to seek answers only to find vague responses which overall left me deeply unsatisfied.

Obviously, I didn't agree with everything which was said in gender critical spaces and still don't, but that's when I realised another glaring issue in my "TRA" community: nobody could really disagree with what was mainstream or try to add nuance or criticise widely accepted statements otherwise they'll be called a TERF and shunned. Yeah, there was some discourse, but it was usually on something like "the community isn't inclusive enough of these neopronouns or this micro label" or it was yet another discussion bashing on homosexuals or female people.

Overall, I realised I was dissatisfied by the community and my views no longer matched it. I still support trans people to the extent where I want them to be happy and safe, but that doesn't mean I have to agree with their views on gender or that I have to compromise my identity as a woman and lesbian. And I think that's mainly what radfem spaces allow me to do.

QUESTION: When you left radical queer/liberal feminism…

I recently asked people to reblog a post if they’d been deep in radical queer/liberal feminist ideology before they turned to radical feminism. I’m stunned by the number of reblogs.

A follow-up question for anyone who is willing to share:

Why?

What was the final straw for you?

[loudmagpie]

It'd be nice if the "sex positivity" was about like...women demanding orgasms and pleasurable sex with their partners with the threat of kicking them to the curb if the don't deliver. Instead it shames women to accept whatever kink their partner has in the name of being "open-minded" and that they shouldn't prioritize having an orgasm anyway because "sex isn't all about orgasms". A woman wanting to have "vanilla" sex with her partner and still climax is viewed as boring. Like, if your male partner consistently gets off each time and you never do, why would you stay with that person if you're "sex positive"? Sure seems unfair to the woman in that situation, almost like it's just another way to get women to do only what men want in bed 🤔.

[loudmagpie]

As much as I despise saying it, the female person who goes by xe/xem/xyr, bat/bats/batself, void/voids/voidself fairy/bread/fair/fairies/fairyself or fairybreadself, stargender autigender, abuingofluid, Macafloric, ragdollgender, self diagnoses herself with every single mental illness in the DSM (or makes up illnesses), aligns herself with thousands of genders that don't make sense and cakes herself in the worst possible fashion and makeup ever, is still apart of my feminism.

I don't care if she hates terfs. I don't care if she hates radfems. She's still a woman I believe deserves liberating even if she's a walking caricature of xenogenders/neopronouns cringe.

[loudmagpie]

will def be checking them out some time!

hello fellow non-Black tumblr users. welcome to my saw trap. if you'd like to leave, please name one (1) Black woman author who is not Maya Angelou, Toni Morrison, bell hooks, Octavia Butler, or N.K. Jemisin. bonus points if she's published a book in the last five years.

[loudmagpie]

seeing all the hatred against straight women by men is why we absolutely need to stand by them. straight woman are a vulnerable population and already deal with so much bullshit from men. they can't even have games with fictional males who love them without men shitting all over it and calling it "femcel gooner material".

[loudmagpie]

Caption From @ essenceofblackculture on instagram:

Kristi Williams

@kristi_williams_black_history, a Black woman whose aunt survived the Tulsa Massacre, saw Oklahoma trying to silence Black history-and answered with action. She started "Black History Saturdays," free community classes to teach what the schools won't.

Now the room is full, the lessons are real, and the legacy lives on. end caption

____________

This is a heroic feat that shouldn’t be needed. But because it is, a hero emerged.

[loudmagpie]

there was some british university debate against christian white nationalist charlie kirk, and he got destroyed by who i'm pretty sure is a radfem or radfem aligned woman. he starts with 'what is a woman', she says 'adult, human female', he talks about radical islam, she doesn't defend it, but rather agrees while also bringing up fundamentalist christians, she briefly talks about how patriarchy hurts men too, but describes it as 'hurting your hand because you punched someone in the face'.

it seems like she was also being very careful to not appear 'terfy', so it was almost like she was fighting on two fronts in the debate, the vocal alt right of charlie, and the silent judgement of her left wing peers.

[loudmagpie]

Girly Self-Care Tips for Girls

Work out every day. Get ripped.

Quit wearing makeup, and ESPECIALLY quit wearing full coverage makeup. It's terrible for your skin.

Don't shave your bush. All it does is increase risk of vaginal infections and give you razor burn + ingrown hairs.

Eat healthier and eat more iron. In the United States, 40% of women are iron deficient.

Fix your sleep schedule.

Take your vitamins.

Learn about your own anatomy.

Learn to self-advocate. It's hard to do, but it will help you massively if you can accomplish it.

Stop dating men. Go 4B.

Stop having sex with men. They are disease vectors.

Ditch coffee, drink green tea. Green tea improves cognitive function and heart health.

You don't need any fancy skincare products. Unless you have an actual skin condition, the only thing you need to put on your face is sunscreen, face-safe soap, and water.

Go outside more. Spend time in nature, or just stand outside in your garden or driveway.

Don't get cosmetic surgery or fillers. By doing so you're just putting yourself in danger for the sake of beauty standards.

Learn everything you can possibly learn.

[loudmagpie]

I believe all women deserve health advice in this world where the male body is treated as the default. Yes, even women I don't agree with. All women should reblog! Stay healthy, everyone!

i know i've said this before but i'm going to say it again because the more i work with geriatric women the stronger i feel about the fact that the only anti-aging that women in their 20s/30s should be obsessed with is building strong bones and muscle mass. that's like the most important thing you can you can do right now to lay a good foundation for healthy aging. you can botox the shit out of your face but that's not going to do anything to save you from dying prematurely from a fatal hip fracture that you can't bounce back from because you didn't do anything to prevent yourself from becoming frail and breakable. like i know that sounds harsh but that is reality for a lot of older women and i don't want that to be you.

[loudmagpie]

healthcare should not have a weight limit.

[loudmagpie]

the three BLACK WOMEN (mary jackson, katherine g. johnson, and dorothy vaughan) that changed astronomy and history.

mary jackson, an accomplished engineer, broke down barriers as the first african american woman to work as an engineer at NASA. her expertise and determination paved the way for future generations of women in the field.

katherine johnson, a brilliant mathematician, calculated the trajectory for john glenn's historic 1962 spaceflight, making her an invaluable asset to NASA's space task group. her calculations were pivotal in ensuring a successful mission

dorothy vaughan was a talented mathematician and the first african-american supervisor at NASA. she was instrumental in introducing computer programming skills to her colleagues, which played a significant role in advancing the space program.

through their dedication and groundbreaking achievements, mary jackson, katherine johnson, and dorothy vaughan left an indelible mark on history, proving that talent knows no boundaries, and that anyone, regardless of their background, can reach for the stars. their triumphs were celebrated in the 2016 film hidden figures, a personal favorite of mine.

i urge you all to read up on these magnificent women and their astronomical (no pun intended) impact on the world. celebrate and encourage black women in STEM. they are magical

[loudmagpie]

Just to clear some things up

What "sex is binary" means :

There are only two sexes

Variations of the sexes are not a third sex

Everyone is either male or female

What "sex is binary" DOESN'T mean :

All people are typical of their sex

There is no variation between the sexes

The two sexes are 100% distincts in humans

People with variations should be corrected

Atypical people are "less" of their sex

Sex characteristics can never change

You can only be your sex in one way

Only typical people have a valid experience

[loudmagpie]

those women’s villages in Africa and Syria that have been set up as havens from male violence…a classic example of how separatism is an elite white woman’s ideology 🤔

[loudmagpie]

Btw the only reason I was a TRA for so long is because other TRAs actively lied to me about what Radfems believed. Like, I never would have gotten that deep into gender ideology without TRAs actively deceiving me and others. Do with that what you will.

[loudmagpie]

no suggestions for now, but just wanted to express my appreciation for this project of yours! I (and many others I’m sure) will be happy to read it when it comes out!! Godspeed, Light Bearing.

I am creating a document compiling lesbian history, particularly focusing on the UK. If anyone has any topic or source suggestions please let me know!

I will share the document when I am done.

[loudmagpie]

A personal note about boobs from someone who’s been through their early 20s

No one told me that as I got older, my boobs would become dense. No one explained what fibrocystic breast tissue was, so with my medical anxiety, I genuinely thought I had breast cancer at the ripe old age of 22.

So here’s some advice for any young radfem out there: keep regular checks on your boobs. Pay attention to any lumps and make sure they don’t grow. If something feels like a hard pebble and seems to get bigger over time, please get it checked out by a doctor.

Because no one told me that as I got older, my boobs would become dense. No one explained what fibrocystic breast tissue was, so with my medical anxiety, I genuinely thought I had breast cancer at the ripe old age of 22!

So here’s some advice for any young radfem out there: keep regular checks on your boobs. Pay attention to any lumps and make sure they don’t grow over time,not if they grow and shrink with your cycle. If something feels like a hard pebble and seems to get bigger over time, please get it checked out by a doctor.

Fibrocystic breasts are characterized by lumpy, tender breast tissue and sometimes cysts.

These changes are primarily influenced by hormonal fluctuations during the menstrual cycle.

Estrogen and progesterone levels fluctuate, causing breast tissue to thicken and sometimes form fluid-filled cysts.

The exact cause of fibrocystic breast changes isn’t fully understood.(shocker 🙄)

Hormonal changes are believed to be a major factor in the development of these changes.

DIFFERENCES:

Fibrocystic changes often cause painful, movable lumps that vary in size and tenderness throughout the menstrual cycle.

Cancerous lumps are typically firm, painless, and don’t change with the menstrual cycle.

A cancerous lump in the breast often feels hard and firm, with irregular edges!!!

HAIR ON THE CHEST!

Hormonal changes in your 20s and 30s can also cause nipple hair to change in appearance or become noticeable for the first time.( I was really all panicked cause my right titty had areola hair and my left didn't)

DENSE TISSUE!

Dense breast tissue means your breasts have a higher proportion of fibrous and glandular tissue compared to fatty tissue.

Breast density is determined by a radiologist when analyzing your mammogram.

Age affects breast density: breasts tend to be naturally denser in your 20s and 30s and become less dense as you get older.

Real talk: boobs aren’t anime balloons they don’t jiggle endlessly or look perfect all the time. They get dense, lumpy, and hairy!

Everyone talks about puberty like it’s just a teen thing, but nobody warned me about what hits you when you actually turn 20!

So if you’re about to hit that age, keep an eye on your girls, don’t freak out if things feel different, and get anything that worries you get checked out.

I’m not a doctor, so don’t ask me if you think it’s breast cancer, because, well, I’m not. All I can do is share what I went through and what helped me.