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Omg wait did they nuke STEM off of TIKTOK?

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Danny held back his laughter as he sprinted away. The note he left in the batmobile is going to rile up Gothams furries if what his boyfriend said was right.

All he wrote was, "I'm dating your clone, and there's nothing you can do about it." No signature, no fingerprints, heck, he didn't even reveal who's clone it was. Now he and his boyfriend are going to follow along with invisibility and popcorn to watch their heads explode.

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Danny purposely wrote the worst fanfiction he could think of to mentally destroy Tucker and posted it online for everyone to read.

It was a fic so horrid that is would make Lex Luthor squirm, the Justice League writhe and any bats reading it cringe so hard thier spines would be turned to powder!

...so why were the Justice League at his door? And why are they saying that they need to protect him from the people his fic pissed off? Were supervillians really going to try to murder him over one fanfic?

A nearby explosion was his answer. Huh. At least it wasn't ghosts this time. Unfortunately, his parents are involved all the same, which meant their tech was involved, and he was powerless until he could get away from both them and the Justice League who wanted eyes on him 24/7.

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The Dark Knight, Batman, Mr. “I am the night” maintaining his mystery even while revealing his identity in a justice league meeting:

The JL: Bruce Wayne?!

His wayward children, who have scheduled a “Brucie Wayne” funniest moments and scandals compilation to kick on in about 30 seconds on the monitor:

The JL: … bruce wayne

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The Real Reason Joker Hates the Robins

(Batman 2016, #54)

(Batman 1940, #408)

(Robin 1993 #139)

(Batman and Robin 2015 #40)

You cannot convince me he didn't giggle a little with those last two, or snort, or something.

Bonus, some sick kids make him smile for a scavenger hunt:

(Superman 2018 #39)

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Part 34! Alfred let Tim leave the poster up for a day before he makes him take it down

Prev ~ Beginning ~ Next

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Rightfully so

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whenever people say that they dont think the crows act like teenagers i have to laugh because. like. as a teenager. they do. they're relatively mature because they're all severely traumatized and had to grow up fast (also because considering the time period it's based on it's completely reasonable for younger kids to be expected to do more) but they still act like teenagers. i've seen a bunch of people mention the "my ghost wont associate with your ghost" convo and "pay someone to pay someone to burn your kruge" but also, Jesper makes multiple sex jokes. Inej purposefully takes the harder route Kaz can't handle so he'll let her go alone. Wylan complains about pretty much everything. Nina spends most of the first book needling and pissing off her ex because she enjoys it. Kaz spends half his energy trying to be mysterious and cool. Matthias calls Kaz a demon for most of the books because he doesn't like him. Kuwei uses the fact that he looks like his crush's crush to kiss his crush. he also pretends he doesn't know Kerch because he didnt want to talk to people.

and, hands down the most teenager scene in the entire duology, Kaz and Jesper get in an argument and start a fucking fist fight. they are literally rolling on the ground punching each other. and everyone just fucking stands there. watching. Wylan wants someone to stop them but no one does. because they're not actively trying to kill each other. so whatever its fine. and then afterwards they're besties again. that is how 99% of the fights at my school go my dude, they are SUCH teenagers.

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i think strange and off-putting wylan is the best. you know how he is in those fanfictions where he just. stares. and creeps people out. in the inside, he's having ten different panic attacks, but on the outside it's all just big blue bambi eyes and an entirely unresponsive demeanor. things happen around him and he doesn't react. he doesn't move. he doesn't blink. he just stares. he's weird and there and that's it. jesper instantly needs him carnally and all he did was look at him blankly and ignore him from then on. nina finds him hilarious. matthias finds him a little weird but also the most normal person in the crows. inej gives him a knife to protect himself but he's already got a whole lot of bombs hidden in his little gay satchel that he's told no one about and will bring out in the middle of a random fight where he will romantically lock eyes with jesper and then blow up a bunch of people. kaz glares at him and wylan just looks back without flinching so kaz hires him because how the fuck??? how??

idk i just love off-putting wylan he's my favorite

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thank you jack wolfe for deciding that wylan holds objects with both hands

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The crows are here 🪶

Shoutout to the five Six of Crows fan this fanart possibly reaches; Good books... Good books...

Please, enjoy my humble fanart offer... AND TALK TO ME ABOUT THEM!

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How would the perfect soc adaptation look in my head (which means this will be a delulu take)

-Crows appareances closer to the text

Different eye color is fine (except Inej) hair color i do believe is a must be accurate since the only one who could pull of a different hair could be Wylan and you can't do brunette Wylan better than Jack Wolfe already did so-

Young looking enought (can't be actual minors) that they don't have to be aged down (or at least not too much)

Mostly unkowns so they can be more easily percieved as the characters come to life.

-A more quirkly format compared to Netflix

The Shadow and bone format works perfectly fine for the original trilogy, Soc needs more movement, more sense of irony, shifts in time , creative narrative. Closer to Netflix´s a series of unfortunate events or Prime´s good omens

ex: Nina flirts with Kaz, narrator mentions Nina´s flirts with everything "shows Nina flirting with a man" "cuts to Nina flirting with a woman" "cuts to Nina softalking to the camera, then reveals she was talking to shoes on a store" with no narration between

Either narrated by the actors or (remember is a delulu take) the people who did the audiobooks, the actors from the netflix show pass on my mind too

To characters pov, mostly is in neutral but on flashbacks, each character has a diferent camera filter (ex: Helnik´s past would have two versions) , each character having an motif when they are having am important moment, each cut of scenes having a different sound that fits which character´s pov chapter is the one matching the scene on screen (a crow sound for Kaz´s, a blade sound for Inej, heartbeats for Nina, gunshots for Jesper, wolf whistle for Matthias and either explosion or flute for Wylan)

Color coding costumes, in different amounts depending each of them (ex: Inej , Matthias and Wylan don't wear colorful outfits so give them accents) also to distance their image from the netflix version, give Kaz some red stuff (like tie) instead of grey or blue accents like on the series, Inej leaning closer to purplish and grey/silver shades, Wylan with white shirts instead of vest, Jesper with more colorful outfits, Matthias just a different desing of uniform and Nina...not what they did on netflix.

-Cameos or references (remember this is a delulu thing)

Thr netflix actors on minor roles (or narrations as i said above) some ideas: Jack as Joost, Kit as male Anya or Rotty (or another minor dreg member), my first idea was Freddy as Oomen but probably old Kaz assaulting new Inej would be too awful so i´d settle on Geels or the guy that pretended to be Pekka Rollin´s son (the most ambitious would be a brief flashback of Nina on the civil war with a glimpse of him as the darkling) . Cal as Muzzen seems too mean spirited so maybe a random ice court guard. Amita and Dani either as the girls that Inej and Nina muzzle to steal their clothes or (again DELULU) as Zoya and Genya (the "she reminds you of me" exchange would be a bit funny)

Inej´s narration could also include a bit where the names of her knives are followed by cards of the saints (aka, an alina image)

Okay, this is what would be good in my head , is not going to happen but what the hell

With shadow and bone i think they should actually continue the netflix storyline, save that version of Alina and Zoya because i don't think a new version will hold up.

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matthias helvar was not a nazi, he was a boy built like a weapon and left to die trying to be human

i am so unbelievably tired of people calling matthias a nazi or white supremacist (????) like they skimmed six of crows with one eye and a twitter filter and decided to cosplay moral literacy.

you want to understand drüskelle? look at vikings. look at central asian nomads. look at mongol military doctrine. not fucking gestapo. fjerdan language is literally scandinavian rooted, the culture is a cold, norse coded polytheistic pantheon, a divine warrior class, and sacred wolves, tribal theocracy. they literally do not give a single fuck about being superior and think that others are subhuman for being different. all they talk about is grisha are dangerous but not because they’re lesser but because they’re threat.

matthias was not raised on supremacy. he was raised on vengeance. his family got murdered, he was conscripted as a child. not brainwashed like it’s a class he could skip; groomed, militarized, stripped of softness, molded into a holy weapon by a state that demanded obedience and called it righteousness.

you think this is a redemption arc? it’s not. it’s a ghost story.

he doesn't know how to be a human. nina tells him -literally textually, not subtextually- he doesn’t know the difference between a good man and a good soldier. he gives her the same oath he gave fjerda. that’s not romance. that’s structural damage. this boy has no idea how to want something for himself without filtering it through violence, duty, or sacrifice.

he doesn’t even have a personality. not really. not until right before he dies

when he, jesper, and kuwei escape from the dime lions, and for the first time in his entire life, he thinks "i’ll find nina. we’ll change the world."

that’s the first moment he thinks like a person. not a soldier. not a legacy. a person.

and what does he do?

he tries to help a boy.

and he dies.

not because he “paid the price for his past.”

he dies because he was a half-built soul making a full-hearted decision with no idea how to survive it.

he still thinks like a twelve year old boy who accepted losing blood for trassel

“i won’t hurt you even if you hurt me.” // “you don’t want to hurt me. i was like you once.”

he still acts like “doing good” means dying for it. because that’s the only model he’s ever had.

this isn’t justice. it’s unfinished. it’s unfair. it’s textually written to be a scream cut short.

and you reduce that to “nazi boy dies lol”?

be fucking for real

matthias didn’t get a redemption arc, he was learning how to be a human and we were going to read his redemption if he didn't fucking die.

matthias helvar was not evil.

he was barely even alive before he met nina/crows

and he dies the moment he starts to imagine he could be more.

ps. also, no, he didn’t get shot by his "past self." matthias never would’ve shot a man who was unarmed and willing to cooperate. joran was 14 when he killed matthias. matthias was 12 when he risked losing his arm to save trassel. he didn’t even scream when his bone was about to break.

he was the same 12 year old boy who thought he could gain the trust of the aggressive opponent by being kind. that’s why he died. because he never got to grow up fully.

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Jesper: I wanna wake up with you for the rest of my life.

Wylan: I wake up at 5:30 am every morning.

Jesper: ...I wanna consistently see you at some point every day for the rest of my life.

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Look at this cute hairbrush set I found at goodwill 💕

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SUPERGIRL By character concept artist & Powerhouse animator, Polluxery