lurkinglibrarian

[lurkinglibrarian]

Given that floral sundresses with spaghetti straps are everywhere this summer and so many outlets are suggesting they be worn over baby tees, I propose that we collectively take it one step further back into the late nineties and start wearing them with black chokers and combat boots again. That was a good look. We should not, as a society, have let it slip through our fingers like we did.

[lurkinglibrarian]

An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants.

“Euripides?” says the tailor.

“Yeah, Eumenides?” replies the man.

[lurkinglibrarian]

I need this.

[lurkinglibrarian]

[lurkinglibrarian]

[lurkinglibrarian]

Guys I just realized the last supper was the first murder mystery dinner!!!

[lurkinglibrarian]

@tyleroakley

This RELIC was found in an Salvation Army in Santee, CA

[lurkinglibrarian]

Your child pours all the toothpaste into the sink.  Your kid cuts their own hair.  Your baby gets into your lipstick and decides to put it on the dog.  Your child cries because their crush doesn’t like them.  That’s kids will be kids.

Your child calls other children homophobic, racist, or misogynistic slurs.  Your child steals or tells other children that they’re not allowed to play in certain areas.  Your kid punches their crush when that child doesn’t reciprocate their feelings.  That is NOT “kids will be kids” and you as the parent or teacher need to put a stop to it. 

[lurkinglibrarian]

mcqueen

[lurkinglibrarian]

…I just woke up from a dream in which there was an app that notified you when nearby LARPs needed an NPC, and you could, like, go pretend to be a surly shopkeeper or whatever and get paid, like, $10 for it.

[lurkinglibrarian]

[lurkinglibrarian]

I was being interviewed for a job at the library. I gave the library board my resume, and when they asked about previous experience, I said I had been a book for 10 years.

[lurkinglibrarian]

[lurkinglibrarian]

Sing me the song of your people SOUP! meow! Sing me the song of your friends SOUP! meow! Sing me a song for the good times SOUP! meow! Sing me a song, a song. HEY SOUP! meeeeoooow!

[lurkinglibrarian]

i cannot stop thinking about the noise his head makes when he goes back under the table

[lurkinglibrarian]

me: i like this thing! my brain: excellent, it’s your reason to live now. you won’t be able to think about anything else for a few days, weeks or even months. talking about virtually anything else will be a nightmare, but so will be talking about The Thing, because no one shares your level of enthusiasm. have fun!