lynx-798

[lynx-798]

Unable to talk to anyone. Being hyper-independent can be a real pain at times, yet words in my head are keeping me awake, so writing them down instead. In the hopes that I’m able to sleep.

[lynx-798]

You know those days you feel your mental health take a nose-dive? Yea, me too.

If I just had people around me that would notice, but I’m not the one that they’d choose over other people.

I’m just always second choice. Not important enough.

[lynx-798]

Excited to travel once again! Next month I’ll be going to Paramaribo (Surinam) with a friend of mine. Never been to South-America before but since it is my father’s home country, I have to have been there at least once in my life, right? Let’s see how many of my fathers family I’m going to meet.

[lynx-798]

Next semester at uni is yet to start, already asking myself why this was a good idea again..

[lynx-798]

Trying to gather my courage and recharge my social battery for next week, when I go on a 4 day sailing trip with 6 classes of 13-year olds… well, if you’re looking for me next weekend I’ll be laying in bed as some kind of zombie, after the kids sucked the life out of me.

[lynx-798]

So much to do... so little time.

#says my delaying ass

[lynx-798]

Me and my brother are opposites. I am an introvert who loves books and videogames, he is an extrovert with a lot of friends, making him the fun one. You know how exhausted that is at times?! Lockdown for him is like jail, meanwhile I am here totally fine with staying at home for days. I am just glad I have a place of my own know, so he can’t really annoy me.

[lynx-798]

I have a “I don’t feel like being a grown-up today” day. If you’re looking for me I am eating Cheetos for dinner in my pillow fort.

[lynx-798]

So, I’ve got a videocall with my professor at 2 and I’m seriously having a mixture between a panick/anxiety attack with a good doses of hopelessness. I’m not even kidding I haven’t slept at all in the last 30 hours...

[lynx-798]

My mood right now: “I’m fine, it’s fine, I’m fine, I’m fine, I’m FINE!

[lynx-798]

I think all the mail and delivery services have never been able to deliver this well...

[lynx-798]

I can’t stop wondering if it’s my fault that I have social anxiety and am a introvert. My teachers keep telling me that I am not really being a student like the others, as example because I don’t go out a lot. I have a message for you, some people don’t like to go out! Why make it the reason to hold me back? I get it, I am learning how to become a teacher. I can teach just fine, I can speak with my students and colleagues no problem, but I am a absolut mess with formal settings. Why can’t they just accept that? I am one of the best with kids who have, like me in my younger days, terrible cases of social anxiety, they appreciate the knowledge and experience I have with it and I help them. But apparently that’s not what university’s wants in there teachers, no only extroverted people are great teachers and the introverts just don’t matter, they don’t have a voice anyway. Then again, I am writing my frustrations here instead of telling them of..

[lynx-798]

So, I came home late and went to make myself some tomato soup. When I pour it in a bowl my bowl breaks, soup everywhere except in my bowl, so I take a second bowl en pour what’s left in the pan in the there and that bowl breaks as well. Now I have no food whatsoever and my kitchen looks like a horror movie.

[lynx-798]

Gotta love those highschoolers who try to take pictures of the answeringbooks, I’ll see it, I always see it, even if you think I won’t, I do. And still ask me why they got detention...

[lynx-798]

If you’re an introvert, follow @introvertunites​.

[lynx-798]

Ever felt bad about something, that you don’t have to feel bad about and then you feel even worse because you don’t feel bad about it.

[lynx-798]

When your done with one essay that’s been bothering you for weeks now, but you have 6 more that have to be done this week