m0therfuckerstookmybrain - Tumblr blog

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

cute date idea: we’re shopping for everything we’ll need at our new apartment and laughing as we make suggestions for dumb things that we’d never need. i can’t get this stupid smile off my face, knowing i’m about to share my life with you

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

cute date idea: you invite me over to your home, make us popcorn, and surprise me with a huge blanket fort you spent the whole afternoon on. we stay close and spend the night hiding from the world, cuddling and watching our favorite holiday movies. the world is so warm when we’re together.

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

If a woman has

STARCH MASKS

O N   H E R    B O D Y

does that mean

she has been pGReNant bef o r e?

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

friends with a guy who’s favorite color is beige

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

wouldnt it be fucked up if one day clouds all solidified and fell down at terminal velocity onto earth killing most of its tenants

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

cant believe www. stands for world wide web

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

mcgonagall gets bored and starts assigning homework like ‘turn the weirdest thing you can find into a chicken

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

Imagine

Your f/o kissing your body. They sweep their lips along your skin, pressing firmly on your cheeks, the rim of your ear, your jawline, hair, neck, collarbone, shoulders, arms, hands, chest, stomach, hips, legs, or wherever you’d like them to, passing you a glance at each new area to make sure they aren’t making you uncomfortable. Their shallow, gentle breaths skim along the surface of your body, weaving through the hair that lines your skin, and making your heart race wildly. Your hand runs through their hair, your fingers softly rubbing their head, encouraging them to continue as they lavish your figure in warm, endearing kisses. A set of fingers makes its way to your free hand, clasping it tightly. Their tongue occasionally slips from between their lips, leaving small, moist patches trailing across your body. Your hearts beat feverishly in tandem as you soak in each other’s presence, and your fondness for one another only grows with each passing second. You are a canvas on which they express their love, and their mouth is a pen with which they stipple you with marks of their undying affection. 

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

ain’t nothin’ gonna check my vibe,

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

i contribute very little to society but i’m funny so it’s ok

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

dont forget to kill your husband today!! 🌸💖🌸💝

get that money, girls!!!!!! 🌺🌼🌻 <3

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

another day has gone by and honestly it’s pissing me off. the sun comes up one more time and i lose it

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

i want to learn everything about you. i want to learn what you love. what you hate. i want to learn what drives you crazy. what keeps you up at night. your fears. your ambitions. your dreams. and i want to be there, right beside you, throughout all of it.

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

I can’t fix everything, but I can listen to every word and hug you when you cry.

[m0therfuckerstookmybrain]

Just lying in bed with you is one of the best things that could ever happen.