madirose1

[madirose1]

on new year’s eve this psychopathic (ex) fan decided i was gonna be the target of his pent up, year-end anger. he got into my dm’s and proceeded to tell me i “fell off so hard”, called me a loser, desperate, “nothing but a porn account”. called me boring. blocked me on everything. brought up my failed relationship. mind you this loser used to send me unsolicited dick pics for like 2 years… dark spirited and vile. and yes, he is. if you see this, know that your karma is coming. it always comes back around.

girl…. shit was crazy lmao. this isn’t the first time i’ve had extreme reactions to this new era. i’ve been told about myself left right back forward up and down. i knew i was making something different, but i didn’t realize it was gonna be so polarizing for so many. sorry im a f*g that likes to take my clothes off, stick my tongue out & make slutty electronic music? nah, i’m not sorry lmaooo.

“i’m just a rockstar”

from my perspective as the artist, this era is simply walking the path of my favorite icons before me. and i’m not holding back. i’ve never been *less* desperate. i’ve never been *more* myself. i *LOVE* the music i’m making now. and most importantly, i’ve never felt closer with the fans listening to me now. i feel understood on a new level. no walls up, no colorful, sparkly get ups. just me, a drink in my hand and a pretty little speedo holding my cock in. it doesn’t get rawer than that (pun intended).

there’s a conversation to be had about the way gay men will hold other gay men to this insane, impossible standard & their constant need to tear each other down when they see another climbing, but i don’t have time nor do i care to. good fucking riddance dude. you will never put me in box. i will never be someone you can control. i’ve heard every insult in the book. i’ve been told both that everything and nothing is wrong with me. i’m ready for everything the new year brings. YOU CAN’T GET RID OF ME BITCH!!!!

alright. album announcement is actually coming, sry to pull a sza and lie, idk why the pre-save page hasn’t appeared. i’ll see you soon though fr!!!!! love you.

-MM

[madirose1]

My latest single TOM HARDY OUT NOW ★

Today I saw a new-fan review of the single. Overall reception has been so positive and I’m so glad everyone’s feeling down for a sexy night out with this one.

This little review really piqued my interest though. The poster started by saying the single cover & song title came across desperate, but they couldn’t resist listening (funnily enough negating their point). By the end of the song, they became a fan and praised me for being talented, executing the song well, and being an exciting gay male pop act. “It’s rare” they went onto say and they hope to see me get bigger.

This kind of led me to the point of this post and I sort of had an epiphany. I think a lot of people — especially queer men who only gravitate to female pop acts — seem to misunderstand my art and my perspective overall. I think that’s sometimes why it takes so long for new audiences to warm up to the idea of me.

I’m very aware of the type of music I make. I love it and that’s why I do it. It’s hedonistic & humorous, but I don’t think many know that I’m in on that aspect of my craft.

Now I’m not acting like TOM HARDY is this thought provoking poetry although some would argue it is… it’s self-confident to the point of overly cocky, it’s extreme in both lyrics & sonics, and in the end, it’s meant for a pregame, a night out, a bender, the gym, whatever your flavor is.

But in the context of my upcoming body of work “THE PENTHOUSE”, it is an extreme high right before a sudden fall from grace. It’s written from the perspective of a young guy who’s being told daily what a star he is. He’s on top of the world, he’s feeling sexy and confident, he’s always showing off, because for the first time it feels like people in the industry are recognizing his gift & ready to change his life forever. Wouldn’t YOU feel like a young Tom Hardy?

I’ve harped on my fallout with the label for long enough. I’ve moved on and the best part? I feel more confident than I ever have in myself and my art. So now I’ll just let the project tell the rest of my story. I had the choice of making a body of work that feels like a tragic loss or I could turn that pain into something that uplifts people. I think with this song and my past 3 releases, it’s clear what path I decided to take. Even though it sometimes feels very misunderstood, especially as of late, I’m excited by and proud of every artistic decision I’ve made. I’ll have the official unrated music video & an album release date for you as soon as I wrap up the title track. See you very soon ★

[madirose1]

It's my 4 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

[madirose1]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28000632

Sypaul fic :)

[madirose1]

Sypaul getting ice cream?

You know that SAF Horror Movie post that was supposed to be headcanons and I wrote it into a oneshot instead? Yeah, I'm back at it. Look, there's nothing I love more than those two wholesome gay werewolves. Genre: Fluff/ Romance Words: 2054 TL;DR: Paul and Sybilus go out to get ice cream? Is it a date? Not officially. Could it be? Very possibly. TW: There's literally none. It's all wholesome. It’s just a lot of gay panic.  ________________________________________________________

Paul sighed, walking down the streets aimlessly. He was back in Connor Creek, just for a visit. He liked to visit as often as he could- especially around the full moon. It made things a *lot* easier on him. Because even if he hadn't gone full werewolf yet, he did still experience a lot of the struggles that came around that time of month. It was good to be around other wolves- especially Desmond. And of course with the silver reserves, most of the less-than-ideal urges that came up that time of month were kept at bay. The full moon happened to be in two days, so... here he was again.

He wasn't quite sure where he was going. He was just walking, a bit bored. He felt a hand on his shoulder, and he pivoted... so quickly that he fell flat on his ass. Smooth, Paul. Even worse: It was Sybilus. Sybilus, the one person he didn't want to see anything like him flat on his ass. Paul had developped feelings for Syb. He had always though Syb was cool, but... he'd started to catch himself daydreaming. He was good looking, sweet, smart, and... god, he had the coolest name! Paul hadn't meant to fall so hard, but... damn. Both men blushed at the situation they found themselves in. Paul felt bad, reacting like that. He was a bit jumpy... especially with the full moon so soon. Sybilus offered him a hand gently, and Paul took it, standing up.

"T-terribly sorry to have startled you." Sybilus blushed. "I, um..."

"Nah, my bad." Paul chuckled softly. "I'm just jumpy."

"I only meant to say hello... and ask you if you had any t-time- ah! P-p-plans?" Sybilus bit his lip nervously.

"Well... hello." Paul smirked. "And no I don't. Why?"

"I-I was thinking p-p-perhaps we could go into town." Sybilus proposed. "Not this town... the r-real city. M-m-maybe get something to eat?"

"Oh... I actually just had lunch at the Dead Canary." Paul told him. Shit. What was he doing? He actually wanted to go out with Syb.

"We could get ice cream, then. For d-dessert." Sybilus offered.

"Oh yeah! I would be so down for that!" Paul grinned.

"I only say we go into town b-b-because... I-I was going to suggest ice cream anyways. W-w-we don't have a-any real i-i-icecream places here." Sybilus sighed, walking with Paul. They now knew where they were going. To his car. "I-I would start one myself, but I'm rather busy with my other work."

"Maybe I should move here and start one." Paul thought aloud.

"Oh, Paul... y-you've got a very important job." Sybilus shook his head. "We need people like you t-t-to keep sharing the important news with the world."

"Oh yeah, but... I could podcast from up here. Drive into the city to record when I need to..." Paul theorized.

"Well... if you wanted, we could live together." Sybilus offered. "I-I mean you could live a-at my house. You're welcome."

"You know, I'm genuinely considering this." Paul chuckled, climbing into the car. "This could be fun. And it makes sense for me to be here, right? Why just... keep visiting for full moons?"

"You make a v-v-valid point..." Sybilus considered.

"Are you actually cool with me crashing with you?" Paul checked. "Because like... it makes sense, with the two of us being wolves."

"O-of course." Sybilus assured him, starting the car. "And you're right."

"Well that settles it. I'm moving to Connor Creek, running an ice cream shop, and working on my podcast from here." Paul decided.

"M-maybe you should think it over a little bit m-m-more." Sybilus chuckled, driving down the road.

"Yeah, you're right." Paul chuckled nervously.

There was silence in the car for a bit. Neither Paul nor Sybilus knew what to say. Paul had honestly just kept talking about the ice cream shop because he didn't know where to stop. It was awkward, but not tense. Overwhelmingly, if either one had been paying attention, they would have noticed the romantic tension. Both were very evidently interested in each other. But they weren't even able to look at each other with nerves. Paul tapped his fingers nervously. God, now he’d committed to *living* with Syb. He was so nervous that he couldn’t look at the guy but apparently he was going to live with him now. God, he was an idiot. Paul rested his head on his hand, looking out the window. 

“So... have you any idea w-what season three of Wayward G-guide is going to look like?” Sybilus asked. 

“No clue. Lesly hasn’t even told Artie and I that we get to do it yet.” Paul chuckled. “Who knows who it’ll go to.”

“Oh.” Sybilus frowned. “But you and Artemis did so well with it!”

“Yeah. Lesly’s weird like that.” Paul sighed. “Last I heard he’s looking for siamese twins. Who are also podcast hosts.”

“Have y-you considered podcasting independently?” Sybilus suggested. 

“I mean... kinda.” Paul shrugged. “But like... I don’t know. There’s something about Wayward Guide specifically that I just... I loved it.”

“Do you know what in specific that s-s-something might have been?” Sybilus tried to help. 

“I... not really.” Paul admitted

“Could it have been the s-story you were t-t-t-telling and not the actual podcast itself?” Sybilus pointed out. 

“You know... you could be right.” Paul realized. 

“Well... m-m-maybe you could do a podcast on the h-history or Connor Creek while you’re here. S-s-set up a little studio. My office is always rather quuiet, so you could use that.” Sybilus suggested. “M-maybe you could do a podcast on p-paranormal and s-s-supernatural histories throughout our country!”

“You know, that would be really cool.” Paul agreed. “I’ll talk to Artie about it. You know, since... we’re a pair.”

“Oh, of course!” Sybilus nodded. 

“Yeah...” Paul bit his lip. He looked to his feet. “Hey, Syb, can I ask you a kinda weird question?”

“Of course.” Sybilus assured him. 

“Is there anyone in Connor Creek who’s LGBTQ+ other than Donny?” Paul asked. Oh god. What was he doing? Where was he going with that question. How was he going to play that off? He got an idea. “I mean... just in case APN wants to use that kind of information to celebrate during Pride month.”

“Well... let’s see...” Sybilus thought aloud. “I believe that C-Crispin and Odie Doty were seeing each other before Odie’s unf-fortunate demise. Madison once brought a girlfriend to town council. They’d met at a ‘S-Small Town Law Enforcement Summit’. I always wondered what happened t-to that girlfirend- she was l-l-lovely. And, erm... I’m gay.”

“You are?” Paul started to beam. He caught himself too late, a blushing mess. Goddamnit he was giving himself away!

“Erm... yes.” Sybilus blushed. “I-I’ve never technically come out... no one really d-does in Connor Creek. You just sort of show up with a p-p-partner or two and everyone knows.”

“Huh.” Paul hummed. “I’m bi.”

“Oh.” Sybilus nodded. Paul nearly groaned at what he’d just said. He was real smooth, wasn’t he? Both drove in silence again for a moment. Sybilus pulled into a driveway. “We’re here! T-this is the ice cream shop.”

“So I can get the scoop on my competition.” Paul smirked. 

Internally, he was killing himself. Why was literally everything he was doing and saying to this man today the cringiest, most embarassing stuff in his playbook? Seriously. As far as impressions went... he was not making a good one, and he was sure of it. Well at least Sybilus was gay. He had half of a chance. Maybe if he could just calm the fuck down (or whatever it was he needed to do to stop acting like a total dumabss) he could talk Sybilus into getting dinner with him sometime... or maybe he would somehow manage to drive Syb away after he had made the first move. Paul froze. Oh god. Syb had made the first move.

“Are you okay?” Sybilus checked, already out of the car. 

“Hm? Oh, yeah!” Paul blushed, getting out. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be s-sorry.” Sybilus chuckled. “I get lost in my head sometimes too.”

“Right...” Paul sighed, walking into the ice cream shop with him. Even though it was a hot day, it was just the two of them and the teenage girl behind the counter. Sybilus walked up to the counter ahead of him, knowing how things worked there. 

“H-hello... I was h-hoping- ah! liking- ah! I-I would like two d-double scoop waffle cones please.” Sybilus stammered out. 

“Sure thing.” The perky sales attendant smiled knowingly. “What are the flavours on those scoops?”

“Y-you go first.” Sybilus blushed, looking at his feet. 

“Um... I’ll take one scoop rocky road, one scoop chocolate chip cookie dough.” Paul told her. 

She got to work scooping that. And that’s when Paul found himself doing somethign far too quickly to stop himself: he patted Sybilus’ back to comfort him. He could see how distressed the werewolf was, and... he felt bad. He shouldn’t have to be ashamed of his impediment. Both men blushed, looking to the floor. The tension was high. Paul was frozen, unsure of whether to own his actions or... retreat as fast as was humanly possible. But... he decided to own it, going further and rubbing his friend’s back. Sybilus was blushing even harder. Oh god. Had that been too much. He thought so until... a small smile creeped onto the werewolf’s face. Paul smiled back softly. What in the actual hell was going on with those two?

“Alright, here you go hon.” The attendant smirked, passing an ice cream to Paul. She turned to Sybilus. “What about you, sweetie?”

“One b-birthday cake and one cotton candy.” Sybilus told her. She scooped those two fairly easily. 

“Those ones are always so soft.” She told him, still smiling brightly. She handed him the cone. “Here you go.”

“H-how much d-do I owe you?” Sybilus asked, reaching into his pocket. 

“Those are on the house guys. Happy Pride.” The ice cream scooper winked. 

Both Sybilus and Paul blushed, looking at each other. They seemed to be silently asking each other if they let the girl do that for them. Paul shrugged as if to say ‘why no?’, and they both looked back to her. Paul smiled softly. 

“Thank you.” He sighed, taking Sybilus’ hand and walking back outside the shop. There was a little table out there, and he sat them down at that. 

“Well...” Sybilus chuckled nervoulsy. 

“Yeah.” Paul blushed, chuckling with him. 

“I suppose it would be appropriate to wish you a happy pride...” Sybilus smiled shyly at Paul. “I-I... suppose we’d make a handsome couple- o-or at least she thought so.”

“I mean, she’s not wrong...” Paul shrugged, before freezing. Him and Sybilus just stared at each other for a second, and Paul immediately felt guilty. “I am so sorry if that made you uncomfortable, it just-”

“I agree.” Sybilus cut him off. Both just stared at each other, a look of mutual realization hit them. 

“So, um... maybe she wasn’t so wrong then.” Paul tested. “Thinking we were a couple...”

“M-maybe she wasn’t.” Sybilus sighed. There was a pause. 

“So... is this a date?” Paul checked. 

“I-if you would like it to be.” Sybilus bit his lip. 

“Yeah... I think that would be great.” Paul smiled softly. 

“I-I know of a walking trail nearby i-if you would like to go- ah! W-walk for a bit.” Sybilus offered. 

“I’d love that.” Paul beamed. 

And so the two men got up and started down the road, still eating their ice creams as they went along. Paul hesitantly reached out and grabbed Sybilus’ hand, squeezing it. Sybilus blushed, looking over and him ans smiling softly, squeezing back. Paul supposed now that he had a boyfriend he’d probably have to come out to Artemis... if she didn’t already know. He was like 99% sure she was a lesbian though, so he should be fine. Twinsense... he supposed it made them both gay. He was pretty sure that he couldn’t be any happier than he was in that moment. And he was pretty sure Syb felt the same way. It must be the pride month magic, bringing them together- or maybe it was always meant to be this way. Who knows? Paul was just excited for the journey.

[madirose1]

Sypaul Headcannons

Bc I'm gay and soft for them:

-They dance around each other, oblivious as heck for ages and then they FINALLY get together and they cannot keep their hands off each other

-Like holding hands whenever they're anywhere close to each other

-And from-behind hugs whenever they see each other

-I mean like they're cuddlers to the highest extent

-but speaking of dancing, neither of them can dance for crap. Paul claims he can, but rest assured he certainly can not.

-They both run cold all the time, they share a huge collection of coats and sweaters because of this

-Sybilus has a cat that DESPISES Paul (to Paul's heartbreak), until Sybilus gets sick and Paul absolutely mothers him until he feels better.

-he falls asleep at Sybilus's house and wakes up to find the cat (whose name is Princess bc why not) purring on his chest

-He doesn't let Sybilus move her for ages

-The first time he transforms fully (or second depending on what happens next episode) Sybilus helps him through all the nerves and then they end up messing around for hours (annoying the heck out of the other wolves)

-This, of course leads to cuddling

-They both really like the other's hair and love to play with it

-Both of them have a tendency to walk into walls

-Artemis gives Sybilus the "dating my brother" talk, (which isn't as frightening as it could be bc she was honestly just so excited that finally got together)

-Rita gives Paul his "dating my brother talk), which Paul takez very seriously (and hugs her at the end of it, which catches her off guard and she doesn't hug him back but she also doesn't push him off so Paul counts it as a win)

-Sybilus nearly cries when he finds out about this and hugs her too (she hugs him back tho)

-Paul has a whole armoury of nicknames for Sybilus (Syb, Honey-Buns, Sweet-heart, Bunny, Starlight, Sugar, Silver, ect.)

-All of these cause Sybilus to either light up or turn red every. Time. He. Says. Them.

-Sybilus calls Paul "Dear" one time and Paul just m e l t s

-Sybilus uses this to his advantage a lot after this

-When asked why he only has those two nicknames, Sybilus responds that he "just couldn't think of anything more valuable or sweet than Paul himself, so it seemed natural to call him that" (or something like that lol)

-They make an awful amount of wolf puns, like a god-awful amount of puns

-They love each other very much 💛💛

[madirose1]

Sypaul my loves <3

[madirose1]

I made some AJ compilations! Here they are if any of you want to check them out!

[madirose1]

Painted this jacket!! Really love how it turned out!

[madirose1]

Painted this jacket based off StarKid Hatchetfield