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Titel: MÖRDER TEUFEL AUS DER HÖLLENTIEFE

Inhalt: Die Jungs machen Strandurlaub 😜🏖🌞

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John Watson: As a doctor, the first rule I live by is do no harm!

John holding a gun: My second rule is take no shit.

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I just love the obsession german has with idiomatic little rhymes and alliterations.

Mit Sack und Pack. Glanz und Gloria. Schicht im Schacht. Flinke Füße. Mit Hängen und Würgen. Mehr schlecht als recht. Versuch macht kluch. Klar wie Kloßbrühe. Hätte, hätte, Fahrradkette. Saus und Braus. Ende Gelände.

our speech is full of little flounces and flourishes and tbh it's adorable of us.

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If I was John Watson and this was my roommate and our first interaction was him grabbing my cufflinks and pulling me to his desk to show me his experiment, and he’s giggling and jumping around as he does so.

I’d kill myself…like I can’t handle all that I just got out of Afghanistan

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When I (M29) was a young boy (M7) my father (M35) took me into the city (X167) to see a marching band (M23, M21, M22, F22, M24, M25, F21, M

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its crazy that a lot of what we call 'video essays' these days are basically low budget documentaries on increasingly weird and niche topics. no network approval no tv budget just one guy with maybe a hired editor/writer and a couple of friends willing to read voice lines. and then they put it on youtube like its no big deal. insane.

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daily affirmations:

i am kind

i am in control of my emotions

it does not bother me when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone

everyone in the house has the right to be in the kitchen

i am kind and in control of my emotions even when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone

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upon learning that the upcoming Dracula movie is yet another Dracula/Mina romance, here is an incomplete list of things that would be more interesting in an adaptation than a Dracula/Mina romance:

A romance between Dracula and literally any other character

An origin story for the lady vampires

A feature length adaptation of the Demeter plot (yes, I know this exists already, it deserves more adaptations)

A Dracula origin story set at the Scholomance

Mina and Jonathan going into that "unknown and terrible land" together

Dracula deciding that, rather than just murdering people, he can offer sex in exchange for blood, and chooses to go to London to do this because the locals will not be receptive. He awkwardly tries to ask Jonathan about prostitution in London and Jonathan's proper gentleman sensibilities are affronted

Dracula gets committed to Seward's asylum, somehow

Dracula gets stuck in wolf form and gets adopted by one of the protagonists

Dracula and his ladies go to Van Helsing, expert on the occult that he is, to ask for help trying to conceive

The Crew of Light try to imprison Dracula rather than destroy him, theorizing that, if they can find a way to cure him, everyone he's turned will be cured

Dracula's sexy immortal vampire harem kicking him out of his own castle because they're sick of his shit

Dracula and Van Helsing as bitter exes

The solicitor who gets sent to Dracula is now Gabriel John Utterson, hoping for a nice relaxing vacation after all the Dr. Jekyll business

Sherlock Holmes, somehow

Dracula marries Mrs. Westenra

Dracula is in the Wild West and gets attacked by vampire hunting cowboys

Dracula being so creeped out by Renfield's obsession and vows of servitude that he flees to another country (to which Renfield follows him)

Oscar Wilde fucks Dracula

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my humor might be broken cause I find this trend actually funny

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okay this is kind of a stupid thought but I was thinking about the internal debates that Vulcan society must have around logic and it occurred to me that Vulcan must have “logical relativists” in the same way that human philosophy has moral relativists…I just know that there’s at least 30 Vulcan philosophers who want to KILL the noble Storek House of T’Nel (or something) because he can’t stop telling everyone that All Behavior is Inherently Logical as it Makes Sense to the Acting Party at the Time. Humans are Illogical Therefore it is Logical That They Act Illogicaly, thus All of Their Actions are Logical. All Thought, Conscious or Unconscious, Proceeds from Biological and Neurochemical Impulses. Therefore, the Sentient Being Behaves Much like a Computer, Following its Compiled Commands. No Behavior, Knowing the Chemical Commands that Preempt Consciousness, Can Be Considered Illogical.

and everyone else is just like “ohhh my fucking GOD Storek, shut UP!”

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"Risk! Risk is our business. That's what this starship is all about."

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christian moral icon hickey ✝️🙏✝️🙏✝️🙏 always thinking of jesus first amen

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I feel like no one ever talks about the one scene in Study in Scarlet where we find out that before Watson met Holmes he was, in fact, a FAN OF DETECTIVE FICTION?? He got insulted when Holmes started hating on Dupin and Lecoq. He had faves. The FIRST thing he told Holmes when old dude said he was a detective was "oh like my blorbos! :D" and Holmes told him "your blorbos are shit". Like we talk about Watson being enamored and a d1 glazer all the time but we don't talk about the fact that he MANIFESTED ts into his life. Soulmated so hard that Holmes was his favorite genre before he even met him.

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doctor, soldier, poet, lover

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me when I go out wearing an outfit I wouldn’t usually wear: oh my god everyone knows this is an outfit I wouldn’t usually wear I’m so embarrassed

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me: *trying to take my socks off but they keep getting stuck on my heel* oh fuck. goddamnit.

the extractor fan in a bathroom in Norway that has an intrinsic link to my spirit: *momentarily whirs louder*