mawiya - Tumblr blog

[mawiya]

Positivity - is it really?

I just realized that I have been seeing too much positive things happening with my friends or acquaintances on my social media accounts, whether it may be facebook, instagram, twitter and tiktok (yep!)

Don't get me wrong, positivity is good but there is a saying - too much of anything is bad. Seeing lots of good things with other people can cause anxiety on some or on me?? It causes me to put pressure on myself, got me feeling bad for not being "productive" with my life. Make myself wonder why I am still stuck while others have gone too far ahead. That yeaaah, life is not a race but I want my life to be like that too! Come on, don't tell me you didn't think like that. I'm just being honest.

Disclaimer: This is my own opinion.

Good thing that I realized this sooner, what I need is to rest from social media and take things slow :)

[mawiya]

Silent follower.

I am following this certain person on my social media. She used to be my classmate in sixth grade. We don't talk nor we are friends. We just follow each other and that's it.

I just love seeing her on my feed and watching her instagram stories. I love the aesthetic photos she is posting and I believe we have many similarities, I even bet we could be good friends. LOOL

She's kinda sad lately and been posting sad poems and the likes. And me, being the silent follower is silently cheering her on.

It just made me realize that there are people in our lives that is silently cheering us in our dark times. They do care but just too shy or too worried that cheering people who you don't really talk to may not help in a way (or it's just me). That there are people who is happy in our success and love watching as we walk on our journey.

They exist like an audience while watching us, the main character of a real movie.

[mawiya]

Day 4:

How are you? I don't know what to post since I don't do anything for today except take care of my baby :) Fulfilling for me tho.

- Elena (mother and more)

[mawiya]

Supposed to be day 3:

Being a mother is tiring. Physically for me tho. For some, I don't think so.

Just put my little one to sleep. I was so tired that I lay down on the floor (because our bed is not ready yet)

That's it for today.

Elena (mother and more)

[mawiya]

Day 2:

Went somewhere. Feeling a little bit of regret, fearing that I was not careful enough. Need to remind myself that I have a baby and need to be more careful ot just sit still and stay at home.

We just stayed inside the car tho.

- Elena (mother and more)

[mawiya]

Hello tumblr world! Rarely post anything but I decided to blog a post everyday. So here is the start

Day 1.

Just gave birth four months ago. Yep. I'm a new mom. I am supposed to be busy taking care and learning parenting stuff with my baby but it just got me thinking a lot of things. I am busier than ever but I can't help but to want to learn more skills and gain more knowledge to further develop myself.

- Elena ( mother and more )

[mawiya]

[mawiya]

Pregnant in the middle of this pandemic. I will forever remember these times that I am carrying my first born during this COVID-19. I am considered as vulnerable so it is hard for me to go out even though I want to. I can't even do an ultrasound because I am afraid that I will catch the virus just from visiting a hospital.

Just here to reminisce in the future.

[mawiya]

I just remember when I was on my first trimester and I was super emotional back then.

I am suuper clingy with my partner right here. Wanting his attention all the time. There are times I was wallowing in self-pity because I was craving his attention. Feeling alone in this whole experience and journey of my pregnancy.

I cried in front of him and told him that "You and I both know that I am a strong woman, I am strong. But I need you now."

Said sorry aftewards and told him that "I'm just whiney because of the hormones."

He said that he knows and understands.

It's just one of the moment I want to remember because I am a forgetful person tends to forget some things. It was one of my vulnerable times.

[mawiya]

I am maybe approaching my 15th weeks of pregnancy.

Just decided to document myself while "cultivating" this baby :) I just want something to look back in coming years. It feels funny and happy looking back at those younger years. To those years .. .

[mawiya]

THE PENINSULA IN MANILA

It was actually my first time going into a "fancy hotel" It was a social event for my colleagues in the same field.

It was a good experience for me. I don't know but I like it when I get to know things or experience new things. I could also learn new things about myself.

Like how awfully awkward I act whenever I am in this kind of event. Inner introvert me is screaming!!!! LOL