maybeaweirdo

[maybeaweirdo]

[maybeaweirdo]

anyone else have to like. gentle parent their moms about food. my mom is like “let’s be naughty and eat pizza” and i gently say “food is not inherently good or bad”

[maybeaweirdo]

iiiiit's day 15! which means here's the next batch of dinovembers!

[maybeaweirdo]

my favorite thing about the moomins is that their domestic cottagecore aesthetic is basically just a cover for the fact that they’re actually like 2 degrees of separation from going full feral at any one time and literally everyone knows it

[maybeaweirdo]

I thought the visuals to the conclave movie were so striking but then you see the real thing and it all makes sense

[maybeaweirdo]

earlier my husband opened our snack cabinet and something fell out and he put it back and then a second later i heard him say very quietly “no, it chose me” and then he took it and walked away

[maybeaweirdo]

hung out with cousin's DJ friend last night and he said the best compliment he's ever received was when he was DJing an orgy and did his research ahead of time and came prepared with Portishead/Massive Attack/Cocteau Twins/etc and halfway through the set, a woman stopped mid-blowjob and pulled the dick out of her mouth to say (to nobody in particular) "damn, this mix is incredible!"

[maybeaweirdo]

[maybeaweirdo]

sickens me to my stomach. how dare this guy get to live my dream.

[maybeaweirdo]

mushroom chat just dropped

[maybeaweirdo]

POV: mister Devon Price, PhD, telling me that I am right about everything

Source: Unmasking Autism, discovering the new faces of neurodiversity

[maybeaweirdo]

Spellcasters hate this fact but if you just stick your fingers in their mouth while they're casting a spell with a verbal component it's literally more effective than a counter spell.

[maybeaweirdo]

YOU 🫵 are cute hot and sexy don’t forget that

[maybeaweirdo]

Language is universal

[maybeaweirdo]

also "ough life-saving essential medical equipment uses so much plastic" in this country you can purchase an artificial ballsack for your pickup truck

[maybeaweirdo]

Once I "made" a custom emoji for my mum by crudely drawing a hijab on it and now whenever she wants me to buy a coffee for her I get a text like this

[maybeaweirdo]

little kids make me laugh. i was at a party yesterday and a kid was there and she noticed that i have a long straight cut along the length of my thumb and asked about it, so i told her it was a cat scratch, almost healed, didn't hurt. and then she was sorta staring and touching it for a bit and went "you had bone surgery. because there were termites in your bones."

so i played along and went "oh man, i hope they got em all!" and she went "no. they put in more." lmao