me-1311

[me-1311]

Hello,

Waves and ocean...

Still you are my bestfriend

[me-1311]

Broken Angel

once he told her, she was his angel, and the angel already lost her wings. the angel gave him hope and he gave her new beautiful wings, so they can fly together up to the sky far from sadness. both of them lost in sorrow. the angel love him. but he want to run wild again and he left the angel alone. broken once again. she can’t fly no more. she lost her wings as she lost him too. drowning once again in hell.

[me-1311]

“I hope we last. I hope we do. But if we don’t, this is how I want you to remember me: I want you to remember me curled up, listening to the sound of your heartbeat and tracing maps across your skin. Remember me laughing at your jokes, even the stupid ones. Remember me in hysterics for absolutely no reason and in tears because one time you made me so sad neither of us thought I’d recover. Remember me brave, that time you held my hand and I thought I was going to die; remember me scared and gentle and delicate and breakable - only for you though, only for you. Remember me happy, and all the ridiculous ways I tried to get your attention. Remember the way I was too stubborn to talk to you and how absolutely insane it drove the both of us. Remember all the firsts and how they were so delightful we went back for seconds and thirds and fourths. Remember the songs you couldn’t stop listening to and the childish dreams you allowed yourself about the future. If it’s any consolation I allowed myself to have them too. If it comes to it I don’t want you to remember the ending. Remember the beginning. Remember the first time you knew.

S.Z. // Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #132 (via blossomfully)

[me-1311]

I don’t think I have the courage to tell you how I feel. There are too many obstacles and unfavorable outcomes that would just ruin us, and what we have. And so I’ll burry these feelings deep inside. I’ll let it eat me up until I am no longer the person that you once knew. But that’s okay, as long as you’re still here, or so I hope.

-However, I have always wondered if I can admit my feelings for you if you were to blatantly ask me straight up. Maybe after some liquid courage I would be able to. Or maybe for that moment I would be brave enough to put us on the line.

-m.t.t.

(via mysilentconfessionstoyou)

[me-1311]

You shouldn’t use distance as an excuse to why we can’t be together. It doesn’t matter if you’re right next to me or 900 miles away, I still feel the same. I still want to be with you. I still love you. You’re still my end game.

-Distance is temporary, but my feelings aren’t.

-m.t.t.

(via mysilentconfessionstoyou)

[me-1311]

Please be patient with me. It’s hard for me to let you in because I’ve been screwed over in the past before. I have been wanted and left. I am broken and I am afraid that you won’t want those pieces, or even worse, break me even more. I don’t know when, or if ever, but just give me time to let you in.

-Please be patient with me as I am trying to fix myself.

-m.t.t.

(via mysilentconfessionstoyou)

[me-1311]

Someone asked me the other day what I would do if I saw you in the street, and the question made me stop. Because I really don’t know what I would do, now I can imagine you would come up with an answer like “cross the street” but I genuinely have no idea what I would do if I saw you again. Seeing you for the first time in a while was always such a big thing, it was always a huge hug and a long passionate kiss. But now, after so long…I really do not know how I would react, maybe I would just do the decent thing and shake your hand and ask you how things are and laugh about how odd it is that we bumped into eachother. Or maybe I’d hug you and hold you a little bit longer than I really should. Or maybe I’d avoid you, to avoid the hurt of meeting you as a friend for the first time. Realistically in my head, I’d like a casual exchange of kind words followed by a hug and the promise of making arrangements to see each other again soon. But things tend to not work out how you picture them and you aren’t the girl I fell in love with back then. I miss you though, and I think I always will.

wishful thinking (via 11-11poetry)

[me-1311]

I'm that girl who forgives everyone who gets mad at me. I'm that girl who cares way too much about what people think of her. I'm that girl who fears being alone. I'm that girl who is scared of growing up. I'm that girl who acts like I'm tough when really, I feel like crying. I'm that girl who says yes to everything, because I hate disappointing people. I'm that girl who tries to be nice to everyone then gets taken advantage of. I'm that girl who doesn't care if it's a million dollars or a homemade card as long as you thought of me. I'm that girl who tries to express how she feels, but just can't find the words. I'm that girl who everyone thinks they know, but they don't.

[me-1311]

You were going about your day, probably a lot more busy than you could afford to be but that was okay, you didn’t mind. You were so caught up in your own universe that you were distracted and tripped into a stranger, you were expecting the worst. They look at you, take a breath as if they were going to start an argument but they simply say “I’m sorry, that was my fault” and it takes you back. Nobody has ever taken the blame from you, and you go to apologise but instead you smile and simply introduce yourself. You exchange names and wish each other a good day. Your paths will more than likely never cross ever again, but it was a moment. A moment whereby you let go of your responsibilities and maybe just maybe for that moment you fell in love with that stranger. But it was a missed opportunity, and maybe you should have held a longer conversation or maybe you were meant to ask for their number. Moments like these can change your life, don’t let opportunities like these become ones that are missed. These daily connections are often missed and I guess that the ultimate tragedy. People say that heartbreak is the biggest tragedy possible but I believe that the biggest devastation is in those who were never given the flame to start the fire.

strangers and daydreams #1 (via 11-11poetry)

[me-1311]

When I said you were my passion, I meant that all of my favourite things to do would be worthless once you were no longer here. If the ball came to my feet, I was so drained I couldn’t kick it back. I meant that my poetry wasn’t the same without you, the ink I bleed smudges because right now everything is a blur. If my poetry ever cared so much as to hold my hand, the day you left would be the day that it would let go of my hand and leave me to fight alone. My passions are no longer my passions, they’re memories of great times I had but there’s no future in them. I would like you to know that this all worth it, because as angry as I am, I had the greatest times of my life with you and that’s something I just won’t be able to forget. The things we said in sleep induced conversation will live on for a long time to come, in fact they’ll live on forever in these pages. The late nights and early mornings were worth it, because as you would go to sleep I would look out my window as the sun rises in bright red colours and it would remind me that even the sky bleeds sometimes. You’re gone and the sky still bleeds, there’s a lesson in that I’m sure of it, and I’ll spend my time without you figuring out just what that is. When I said you were my soulmate, I meant that the seasons wouldn’t change quite right. The Spring should bring life to all small flowers and they usually prepare to blossom and then when summer comes around they’ll bloom into their full glory but then it was Autumn and they were still closed and now it’s winter and they’re dying around me. Even the nature that we admired and loved is dying without you, so what about me? I meant every word of my undying wish to become better just so long as you were to go through it with me, but it’s clear now you didn’t mean yours. You’re gone and everything is grey, I mean sometimes in the mornings the sky will set itself on fire but realistically it’s rare that I can ever see it without howling into the early morning hours so I tend to avoid that fire. When I said you had my heart, I meant that if everyone were to leave. Everyone that you love and care about abandoned you, if any stranger that befriended you and then betrayed you, left you. If you parents gave up faith and hope, if your family were to one day decide you were no longer their angel. If your body feels like it can longer go on, and your voice can’t speak on anything but negatives. If the sand in your toes decided to leave you for the ocean, if the curls in your hair fade and your hair is left flat. If mistakes were to carve themselves into your wrist, if the memories were to destroy you from the inside out for doing what you did to me. If your smile is fading by the hour and you feel lost, if the meals become less frequent. If you finally snap under the pressure, if you finally give up and feel like you can’t go on. I meant that I will always love you. Even if you break. Even if you bleed. Even if you’re sick. Even if you’re lonely. Even if everyone else leaves. Even if your mind is a mess. Even if you’re insecure. Even if you think that your body image is deteriorating. Even if pink peonies can’t bring a smile to your face. Even if your nails don’t get done. Even if you’re crying. Even if you’re silent. I will always be there to hold you. If you need someone to lay at rock bottom with you, I will be there because you’re my best friend and I wouldn’t have it any other way. When I said that I could hear you smile, I meant that if I were to simply disappear, I would want you to know that although I didn’t see that smile in person, I will have known peace because of the ring of it. I hear birds flying away when your lips decide that being quiet was enough and that it wasn’t going anywhere unless I told you the truth. I meant that even if I lost myself and you were holding my hand that you’d guide me through the night because sometimes the stars disappear from view and everything goes dark. We are all just wandering souls, lost and trying to find a home, and believe me I know people make some really shitty homes but yours is my favourite. I couldn’t relocate anywhere other than your lungs hidden if your rib cage because I could stay locked up in that cage until we pass and although you weren’t able to breathe alone it was so beautiful. When I said I’m always here for you, I meant the number is here if you need to call. I meant the poetry is always here, you just have to read. I meant that my heart is on my sleeve, all you need to do is feel. I meant there are oceans in your eyes, you just have to swim. I meant the freedom is on your tongue, you just have to speak. I meant poetry runs down your spine, you just have write. I meant that the world around me may be going shit, but as long as you’re around, there’s still hope and as long as I’m around, there’s a chance you’ll choose me. So when you said you still loved me, I finally understood exactly what you meant.

this is acceptance (via 11-11poetry)

[me-1311]

and I just don’t know what you want from me.  I mean, one day you’re here and the next you’re so damn distant. One day were floating on top with the sun shining and I can honestly say nothing has ever been more clear to me than the way I love you but then 2 minutes later, and we’re drowning.  We’re 10 feet under and I can’t breather or see a damn thing. And I just don’t know what you want from me. If you don’t want to float on top with me, then please just let me go because I’ve spent too much time underwater just to be pulled back under. I’ve spent too much time learning to swim, just to learn what it feels like to drown all over again.

love me or leave me, I don’t care anymore just please choose one.  (via fadedheartbreq)

[me-1311]

It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to be sad about it. It’s okay to miss him, and it’s okay to wish you did something differently. But never blame yourself for how things turned out. Never tell yourself you can’t do better, and never tell yourself this is end of the road. Fate has a time and place for all of us and nothing you can do or say will change that. Sure, it’s okay to fall, but it’s never okay to stay down.

Quotes from The Love Whisperer (via thelovewhisperer)

[me-1311]

I understand that your heart is broken. You’re sad. I get it. But don’t let that stop you from living your life. Get out of bed every morning. Do your makeup. Smile. Get through the day. And whenever you don’t feel up to it, just look at the boy who did this to you. Do you think he cried himself to sleep last night? Probably not. As a matter of fact, I’ll bet you that he’s doing just fine. So when you wake up and you feel like laying in bed all day, just remember that he has other plans.

Quotes from The Love Whisperer (via thelovewhisperer)

[me-1311]

So you want to be happy? Then stop letting the smallest things ruin your whole entire day. If you’re bored with your daily routine, do something unexpected. Stop complaining about how alone you are when you’re surrounded by people who actually care about you. Forget all the drama and let go of all the grudges you’ve been holding. Stop wasting time lingering over all that you could have, should have and would have done. Stop spending your days thinking of how much better you could do; stop longing for something that has been and always will be out of your reach. Just live the days as they come. Wake up every morning and smile at the wonderful day that awaits you. Take a risk for once. Let yourself be happy, because you deserve it.

Quotes from The Love Whisperer (via thelovewhisperer)

[me-1311]

I remember when I was love sick. You block out everyone. You feel so tired, because you haven’t slept in forever. You know he’ll be in your dreams but you don’t want to stay awake laying in your bed crying either. You’re starving, but you can’t eat because you’re starving for him and every memory just leaves you with a bigger hole in your heart. Even your clothes reminds you of him, what you wore when you hung out. You can still smell them all over him, even though his scent hasn’t been there for long. You wish his scent would be stuck on you, but you know you’d be pulling at your skin trying to get him off you. You’re online, he signs on, and you want to scream at him to go away, but you just watch the screen waiting for him to say anything, but then he signs off, and you tear yourself apart for not saying anything to him. You stop talking to your friends, and they get worried and try comforting you, but they just make you feel worse because they think they know, but they don’t have a damn clue.

More quotes about love and relationship here (via thelovewhisperer)

[me-1311]

She’s the girl who forgives everyone and everything. Her grandma who cut her out without explanation and her ex best friend who just stopped talking to her. She’s the tiny words she left on the wall, the memories she wishes she didn’t recall. She forgives the people who in one moment screamed in her face for nothing and the other second hugged her tight. She forgives so easily, this is her finest strength but also the most mediocre weakness. She writes a hundred of sad letters to the person, until he or she suddenly forces her to think what made her sad, never happened. But she is learning how to cut ties in honest ways. Searching in the depth of her scars to the find the simple, yet hard way. She’s the girl who forgives everyone and everything. But she must learn how to be the girl who forgives, but also forgets and will eventually let go.

Tina Jaxén // The girl of forgiving (via tinaspoetry)

[me-1311]

She’s the girl who forgives everyone and everything. Her grandma who cut her out without explanation and her ex best friend who just stopped talking to her. She’s the tiny words she left on the wall, the memories she wishes she didn’t recall. She forgives the people who in one moment screamed in her face for nothing and the other second hugged her tight. She forgives so easily, this is her finest strength but also the most mediocre weakness. She writes a hundred of sad letters to the person, until he or she suddenly forces her to think what made her sad, never happened. But she is learning how to cut ties in honest ways. Searching in the depth of her scars to the find the simple, yet hard way. She’s the girl who forgives everyone and everything. But she must learn how to be the girl who forgives, but also forgets and will eventually let go.

Tina Jaxén // The girl of forgiving (via tinaspoetry)