mean-hare - Tumblr blog

[mean-hare]

ok i guess i lied, i actually feel good emotions but its rare and lasts from half to five seconds and - guess what - i just forget about them

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not ED not recovery but a secret 3rd thing

(live in a whole giant depressive pile of mess, eat or drink absolutely random shit in the most random time and forgetting about everything in 30 seconds)

[mean-hare]

no you don't understand. yes, I think that I am the scum of the earth, and hate myself immensely, and think that I don't deserve love of any kind, but I also think that I am the most important person ever, and love myself because I am perfect, and I deserve everyone's attention and love and and and

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shoutout to my dog, the only reason i get up, move and walk at least sometimes

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today i wore a ring and it was more loose than maybe few months before. its weird, bc i binget a lot and my fingers still look fat. but i guess metal ring cant just stretch out?

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bitches w npd be like

its me im bitches

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i often think that if i start writing here my meals per day, it would help me stay lowcal, something like diary the others on edtumbls do. but every single time i fucking FORGET to do it

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wtf the chocolate i loved isnt tasty anymore. just bland. i wanted to have fun and feel like a lucky kid again but i felt nothing =(

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You suddenly switch bodies with your icon. On a scale of 1 to 10, (10 being the highest value) how well are you coping with that change?

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past few day i feel so embarassed by myself and so mentally shitty and inferior, withhout reason, just randomly, for example i pet cat and suddenly comes a wave of shame. it isnt even about body image issues, its just everything in complex... i dont remember the last time i felt it that often. i so fucking hate it

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dying young would be a blessing.

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heyyy let’s play a round of ED tag yourself !! where are my fellow h2hoes (we must suffer together)

(not mine)

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maybe i have to be 30kg mess so you see that im sick of it all. maybe i have to become a walking skeleton so you see that im exhausted. maybe i have to have stick-like legs so you see that i barely can get up. maybe i have to look like i had nothing but water in months so you see that im exhausted. maybe i have to look like im barely alive so you see that im dying

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no. next question?

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me looking at 2000s cartoon character with obviously disproportional body and exagerrated slimness

yall will say "all i want is to look like this and if i dont im gonna kill myself" under the most photoshopped fake ass looking pictures that have ever existed on the face of the earth

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btw fuck all these motivational & meanspiring shit about "stop complaining", "dont whine, its not that hard", "stop whimpering and do it". fuck it, really. whimper, whine and complain as much as you want. you totally can do what you want and whimper at the same time. if you lose weight you lose it bc of what you do, not what you say. its hard, its tiring? you want to complain, cry, lament? do it! ive never did something hard without complaining, its actually help me to do things. write in your pink fluffy diary how tired and sad you are. write a poem about anguish and eternal pain. post in your personal blog "I HATE IT HERE" 3000 times. complaining costs 0 calories

[mean-hare]

sometimes you scroll thru th inspo and its all boring and not motivating at all, same looking teens like plastic dolls, same poses, same shit. boring boring boring yawn. and then you find some dormant, absolutely ed-unrelated random shitblog and see the truest, the thinspiest pic of some godforbidden unknown musician took on shitty camera and it hits you harder that every edblog you ever seen