mechanicalmerlin

[mechanicalmerlin]

Viktor ☆ Any prns

☆ Disabled & Chronically ill

☆ Eastern European living in US. (very unfortunately)

ana-r, npd, asd, c-ptsd

[mechanicalmerlin]

[mechanicalmerlin]

[mechanicalmerlin]

i love sluts i love perverts i love dykes i love faggots i love aromantics i love freaks i love librarians i love ibuprofen

[mechanicalmerlin]

people talking about aspd and npd like we are some sort of urban legend DRIVESS ME CRAZZYYYY

girl i promise you im human. i wont evaporate when you look away. im not gonna haunt you. you can calm down its okay

[mechanicalmerlin]

[mechanicalmerlin]

Hallucinating is normal, many people experience it. You have most likely at least passed someone in the street who was hallucinating once. Or you've worked alongside a coworker who was actively hallucinating and you didn't even notice. Or your loved one hallucinated while you were in the room, but they were afraid to tell you.

Hallucinating is common, it's just not commonly talked about in everyday situations. If you don't experience it, or don't know someone who does and tells you about it, you've probably only heard it in the news or on TV. And they only really represent the worst possible outcome for shock value. But that isn't representative of how most of us who hallucinate experience it.

Most of us are just like everybody else, living our lives, just with the addition of hallucinations. We may need to take pills every day, or need therapy, or need to stay in mental hospitals sometimes, or need to be checked on by loved ones, but so do a lot of other people who don't hallucinate.

Hallucinations are just a symptom. Just like anxiety, or trouble concentrating, or tiredness. A lot of people experience it and have to learn to cope overtime. The only difference is we don't generally talk about it to people in casual settings. And it's because of the stigma. If you don't hallucinate, or know someone who does, you probably don't see hallucinations as a normal part of life, a symptom, just a thing plenty of people experience. But it is, it's not special, it isn't more dangerous, it doesn't have to be a huge deal.

Obviously hallucinations can be life changing and horrific, but so can other mental health symptoms. Hallucinations can also be neutral, or just annoying or even a positive experience. It's just a symptom, it doesn't automatically mean someone is in the worst mental state possible if they are hallucinating. It doesn't automatically mean someone is dangerous or unpredictable. It just means a person is experiencing senses that the people around them are not.

You have to learn to accept that it's just a symptom, and that people around you experience it, and they deserve to complain or talk about it just like anyone else gets to with other things in their lives. All you have to do is listen, and try to be understanding. Hallucinating is normal, you just need to stop treating it like it's abnormal.

[mechanicalmerlin]

body tea or something 🦋

[mechanicalmerlin]

now that i have malice in my heart forever and no hope for the future i can finally relax

[mechanicalmerlin]

[mechanicalmerlin]

The funny thing about me is that I don't remember. What? Anything. Do I have trauma? All the symptoms point to yes but I don't remember. Do I have a personality disorder? All the symptoms point to yes but I don't remember anything to help confirm it. No memory no memory no memory

[mechanicalmerlin]

[mechanicalmerlin]

one bread, one milk, one food,

that's all

I'm confused,

I only want one truth,

I really don't mind being lied to

[mechanicalmerlin]

”what the actual fuck”

as opposed to what? the imaginary fuck?

[mechanicalmerlin]

I eat too much to die, and not enough to stay alive.

I've been sitting here until light comes.

[mechanicalmerlin]

the fucked part about microaggressions is that I always come across as the rude one no matter how I respond to the interaction. someone walks up to me and asks me an invasive question and I have to smile politely and be all gentle with them. I should be allowed to kill

[mechanicalmerlin]

our weight also makes our conditions worse, we need to lose it, all of it

tw // ed

please I can't do this anymore, I can't even look at myself