medusa-but-birds

[medusa-but-birds]

You know what I think is really cool about language (English in this case)? It’s the way you can express “I don’t know” without opening your mouth. All you have to do is hum a low note, a high note, then another lower note. The same goes for yes and no. Does anyone know what this is called?

[medusa-but-birds]

Summer was pretty hot already but its about to get a lot hotter (in a bad way)

“Wildfires and record temperatures in Canada are generating ‘fire-breathing’ pyrocumulonimbus thunderstorms.”

“Absolutely mind-blowing wildfire behavior in British Columbia. Incredible & massive storm-producing pyrocumulonimbus plumes.” [From: Dakota Smith,  Dakota Smith, meteorologist at Colorado’s Cooperative Institute for Research in the Atmosphere, 30 June 2021.]

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“Pyrocumulonimbus: a new word to learn in 2021. It means fires so big and hot they create storm clouds, which shoot out lightning that starts new fires.”

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Excerpt:

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The Pacific Northwest’s hell is just beginning. After being seared by record heat, the fires arrived with a roar.

In what is one of the most unprecedented displays of fire weather on record, lightning lit up British Columbia on Wednesday [30 June 2021]. Data shows a staggering 710,117 lightning bolts – 5% of all of Canada’s lightning in an average year – formed over the province and parts of Alberta. The concentrated display was caused in part by fires already burning on the ground that were so intense, they created their own weather system. […]

“The potential for things to burn there is extreme if it gets dry enough,” Daniel Swain, a climate scientist at the University of California, Los Angeles, said. “It’s bloody well dry enough. The one thing we were all hoping wouldn’t happen happened. It’s a little hard to wrap the numbers around.” […]

Things turned for the worse late on Wednesday. Lytton, a town that became famous in the preceding days for breaking Canada’s all-time high temperature three days in a row, burned to the ground. […]

Chris Vagasky, a meteorologist and lightning applications manager at Vaisala, said in an email that the 710,117 lightning events captured by sensors on the ground that are part of the North American Lightning Detection Network included “nearly 113,000 cloud-to-ground strokes.” Some of that lightning was generated by the fires already burning, which created pyrocumulonimbus clouds. […]

That’s what happened on Wednesday at a scale that’s honestly hard to comprehend. The most recent notable example of a lightning-driven firestorm occurred in California last August [2020]. But even that’s not really a great analog; Vagasky noted that, during that storm, “there were about 20,000 cloud-to-ground strokes” over a four-day period – a fraction of what happened in Canada on Wednesday [113,000 cloud-to-ground strokes in one day]. The heat then was also nowhere near as extreme as what the Pacific Northwest just saw.

Swain said some of the satellite imagery shows the clouds reached heights near 60,000 feet (18,288 meters) above the Earth’s surface. That allowed them to punch through the tropopause, a boundary that delineates the lower atmosphere from the stratosphere, and pump smoke into the upper atmosphere. This is extremely rarified fire behavior. “It essentially looked a lot like a pretty significant volcanic eruption,” Swain said. […]

“This is going to affect a bunch of tribal areas and Indigenous lands that don’t have the same relatively minimal level of resources these incorporated towns have in BC,” Swain said. 

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Excerpt from: Brian Kahn. “‘'I Suspect It Will Get a Lot Worse’: Firestorm in British Columbia Helps Spark 710,000 Bolts of Lighting.” Gizmodo. 1 July 2021.

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Imagery of pyrocumulonimbus developing in British Columbia, with smoke blanketing the entirety of interior British Columbia (Okanogan and central valley systems in brown color in the middle of the imagery; Pacific coastline and Coast Range to the left; Northern Rockies and Alberta to the right.) Illuminated flashes indicate lighting. Imagery by Cooperative Institute for Research in the Atmosphere and NOAA.

[medusa-but-birds]

I love tumblr. I love that tumblr is the best social media site of 2021.

Every other site has spent the last decade perfecting the art of targeted ads. I am a wallet of flesh and blood which must be stripped bare and profiled and picked apart for the maximally efficient way to squeeze profit from my presence. Every other site will fold and morph itself to a shape of my liking - like a fairy tale trickster stealing memories and taking their mold - to lull me into compliance and loosen my coin purse.

Facebook sees me searching fitness equipment and injects my timeline with athletic wear ads. Reddit profiles the subreddits I follow and eagerly promotes a new coding bootcamp or cloud service at every turn. Google overhears me lamenting over my moving to-do list on voice call and fills in my “how much to tip movers” query before I’ve gotten the third word typed out.

Tumblr never even tried.

They could have. The information is there. The basic infrastructure, presumably, exists. Tumblr can recommend me tags based on tags I follow, blogs based on blogs I follow, even posts that for one reason or another may strike my fancy. Tumblr could be - SHOULD be - funneling this framework into advertising, as the only means that free-to-use social media platforms can turn a profit in our capitalistic hellscape.

They just don’t.

Today I saw an ad for treating Hyperhidrosis - a condition, I think, in which a person sweats too much - and I saw it twice, four posts apart, and it is so incredibly benignly impersonally ineptly untargeted toward me compared to all other pinpoint-aimed advertising that I’m endeared to it. Tumblr knows NOTHING about me. 8 years, 51,000 likes, and tumblr has not learned a THING about me.

Advertisements for a mattress? Shitty mobile game ads that don’t make even the slightest pretense at being anything other than a candy crush rip-off? Choose-your-own adventure games either about Royal Espionage or Choosing The Wrong Dress For Your Date with ZERO in-between.

And then this. This here. The culmination, the crown-jewel of tumblr’s nihilistic non-compliance with the state of social media advertising. Any pretense of capitalistic exchange is abandoned at the gas station by the side of the road. This is not a company. This is not a product. This is not anything that fulfills the contract of consumer and seller. 

THIS. THIS IS WHAT TUMBLR HAS TO OFFER INSTEAD.

“Pour vinegar on your bread, fuck you.”

“Put it in the garbage, fuck you.”

“Your wife says you’re a fucking dumbass, fuck you.”

That’s it. That’s the advertisement. You vinegar-breadless cuck. You virgin extraordinaire bereft of bread and garbage can. I am fucking your wife right now in our vinegar-soaked motel bed. She puffs a cigarette which I pulled from the trashcan and we both laugh heartily at her recounts of your immasculine ineptitude. I don’t want your money. I don’t want anything from you. Fuck you. 

Amazing. Amazing. What a state of things to ring in 2021. What a great platform we all collectively choose to be on.

[medusa-but-birds]

but what i REALLY need is a gif of the symbiote cell bumping into the other cells to portray how Evil it is

[medusa-but-birds]

You are a minion in the service of a dark lord. Your master has tasked you with creating and spreading a prophecy about a chosen one, the only person who can defeat him, so that the so-called “heroes” will stop resisting his rule and instead wait for their savior to arrive.

[medusa-but-birds]

You are a minion in the service of a dark lord. Your master has tasked you with creating and spreading a prophecy about a chosen one, the only person who can defeat him, so that the so-called “heroes” will stop resisting his rule and instead wait for their savior to arrive.

[medusa-but-birds]

I really think Rasputin lucked out, in that being remembered by history as some species of giant unkillable sex wizard is something most of us can only fruitlessly aspire to.

[medusa-but-birds]

HEY PALEOBLR

you know how oviraptorosaurs are often called "chickenparrots?"

well i recently learned abt the real life chickenparrot: the kili mooku chicken ("parrot beak/nose" in tamil)

i unfortunately dont know as much about them as i'd like since idk tamil well but from what little i understand, they're a show breed developed in tamil nadu (my state!) who are surprisngly health despite how odd they look! their breed standard also seems to include little to no wattles save a single round comb, so that one comb makes em look even more like oviraptorosaurs!

oviraptorosaur..........2!!!!!

[medusa-but-birds]

Look, I wasn’t in charge of writing the script for The Mummy (1999), and I’m not saying I could do better, but if I hypothetically had been, there would definitely have been a seen that went like this:

Evie, tied up and about to be sacrificed by demons: “RICK, YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO READ THE INSCRIPTION. I NEED YOU TO FIND THE SIGN THAT SAYS  “DBT”.”

RICK: WHICH ONE IS “DBT”

EVIE: IT’S THE CRESTED HOOPOE SIGN

RICK: HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHICH ONE THE CRESTED HOOPOE IS

EVIE: IT LOOKS LIKE THE LAPWING ONLY THE LAPWING’S HEAD IS POINTIER THAN THE CRESTED HOOPOE’S. I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU’D REVISED THIS?

RICK: NOT IN THAT KIND OF DETAIL. I IGNORED THE BIRDS

EVIE: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU “ IGNORED THE BIRDS”

*Demons start chanting

EVIE: WELL YOU’RE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO HURRY UP RICK. IS THERE A SIGN THAT LOOKS LIKE THE LAPWING BUT WITH A POINTIER HEAD

RICK: THERE’S ONE HERE THAT LOOKS LIKE A VULTURE BUT WITH LONGER LEGS AND A POINTY HEAD?

EVIE: ALL THE VULTURES HAVE POINTY HEADS RICK

RICK: YEAH BUT THIS ONE’S POINTIER

EVIE: THAT’S NOT A VULTURE, THAT’S AN OSTRICH

[medusa-but-birds]

Gardien

[medusa-but-birds]

how come cats look outside and start vibrating their little mouths so much and so quick while sounding like they are printing copies from a fax machine. why do birds do that to them.

[medusa-but-birds]

just got back from my first shift as a welder. i have a beam attack now

[medusa-but-birds]

stop this is so cute.....🥺

[medusa-but-birds]

We have no choice but to stan a queen 💪❤️👑

[medusa-but-birds]

ok but if bruce wayne somehow came upon zuko fresh out of banishment he would lose his mind.

black hair? check. bad parent(s)? check. trauma? double check.

bruce: how’d you get your scar?

zuko: my dad got mad at me for saying that killing people is wrong so he lit my face on fire and banished me.

bruce, vibrating with excitement, already pulling adoption papers from his utilility: that’s terrible. how do you feel about capes.

[medusa-but-birds]

hey remember how awhile back i mentioned that tiktok has a whole trend where people mix cleaning supplies well i redownloaded tiktok so im finally able to show you what i mean

[medusa-but-birds]

I died! Source (X)