megan-halsey - Tumblr blog

[megan-halsey]

they should pay you extra if you have to be the only fag in the workplace. they should give you a bonus for that.

[megan-halsey]

its okay dude im not becoming evil muhaha. sorry i mean haha. dont know what happened there muhaha. sorry i mean

[megan-halsey]

playing erdtree with my pal we get invaded by someone named "Drip Inspector" and im like "waitwaitwait. ok lets just pose leaning back to back and wait for them to show up maybe our outfits will be so good they wont kill us"

so we wait until they show up and then they get reaaaal close to us . and then pull out their telescope and start circling around us and zooming in for a good 30 seconds. then they clap, use the "wonderful" and "youre beautiful" prattling pates, and jump off a cliff. invader vanquished

[megan-halsey]

Steven Colbert has been fired in favor of a little green alien nobody can understand

[megan-halsey]

i hate people who know highways. “i’m heading south on I-65” okay man. i’m moving my rook to c2

[megan-halsey]

the white house is such a stupid name. if i were president the first thing i would do is call it the pussy pavilion. the second thing i would do is unleash the bugs of the night

[megan-halsey]

Child in public *yells or cries*

Me: that’s okay. that is just a little guy who doesn’t know anything. :)

Child’s adult: *starts yelling at them*

Me: actually im about to become the joker

[megan-halsey]

[megan-halsey]

[megan-halsey]

whats the loudest reocurring noise that happens near ur house for example i live next to an airport so its definitely the planes

[megan-halsey]

YOU'RE LISTENING TO 102.3! MAD! SCIENTIST! FM!

(Evil laughter, thunder cracking)

WHERE WE DO NOTHING BUT SHOW THEM ALL, SHOW THEM ALL, AND SHOW THEM ALL!

(Chainsaw revving, screaming)

THIS AIN'T YOUR WULFENBACH RADIO STATION! [Radioactive by Imagine Dragons]

[megan-halsey]

[megan-halsey]

due to My Bullshitting in todays DND session we have established that in our game the underdark only has one dance and it is the macarena

[megan-halsey]

watching Seven Samurai

[megan-halsey]

reblog if the first musical you listened to was not Hamilton

[megan-halsey]

'do you think you're superior for not using AI in your work' thank you for asking! yes i do

[megan-halsey]

its terrible for any number of reasons, but i think if we invent immortality there should be an extreme sport called civilizational speedrunning where teams of 20 go into the wilderness somewhere and try and be the fastest build the first internal combustion engine. i bet you could get it down to like 3 years tops