melancholyboy

[melancholyboy]

[melancholyboy]

[melancholyboy]

Paranoia

[melancholyboy]

The last time I dated someone it ended in drugs and prostitution

Now someone 6 years older than me wants to date me, sends explicit things, and doesn’t have boundaries. He was a close friend of mine, and I don’t want to anger him by telling him no, but I can’t, I can’t go through this again

[melancholyboy]

I’m scared

[melancholyboy]

[melancholyboy]

just girly things: 

⋆ not feeling real 

⋆ counting down days 

⋆ holes to fill 

⋆ a mini haunted house in the head

⋆ baby soap

[melancholyboy]

[melancholyboy]

rbs are appreciated <3

[melancholyboy]

trauma sucks in general but childhood trauma that happened either a) before you could form actual memories or b) in such small tiny constant ways that you have no solid memories of it is…a special kind of frustrating

[melancholyboy]

remember that feeling you had as a kid when bad things were happening and nobody seemed to care and you just kept thinking “Someone should be outraged about this!!! Someone should know and be completely horrified and stunned and then take me away from all this!” but it never seemed to happen and you waited and waited until you lost the faith that you were worth saving

[melancholyboy]

me, while being abused: it's okay, I'm used to this already, and I'm tough, I can take it.

me, years later when the trauma symptoms hit: I WAS SO WRONG

[melancholyboy]

[melancholyboy]

am i doing this right

[melancholyboy]

Me @ my gorls when they come and tell me about their shitty boyfriends and how shitty they are.

[melancholyboy]

“what happened to you made you stronger” 

i was a child. i didn’t need to be strong i needed to be safe

[melancholyboy]

i have that bastard blocked but part of me hopes he sees this

guess what fucker

you broke me

congrats

i hate what you did to me