memoirsofareddittroll

[memoirsofareddittroll]

So I got IP banned from Reddit today. I might post the story later. But those dumbass mods better not think they're getting rid of me that easy.

[memoirsofareddittroll]

AITA Shitpost #1: If you're from Africa, then why are you white?

So, here we go with the first one dating back to January, 2022. This one I'm particularly proud of, as it was my first, and it reached over 100 comments shortly before being recognized as fake by the mods. You can find the original post here (although, since it was locked, you won't be able to read it). Luckily for you, though, I still have the account and can thus share the post with you below.

"AITA for not knowing a lot about geography?

I use a throw away, because this situation is apparently embarrassing for me, so I would prefer not to be traced to my real account.

This started when I (24M) overheard some friends M (24M) and G (25M) talking about economics. I decided to join in, because one of them said the phrase “African immigrants,” which I thought was quite humorous, because it is an oxymoron. I pointed this out, and they both just looked at me. G asked me do I know what an oxymoron is? And I answered yes, I think it is a contradictory phrase. G then asked me what was the contradiction? to which I responded that “immigrant” implies to leave ones country, and one doesn’t leave ones country when he or she goes from Africa to the other states. Then M asked me what had I meant by “other states”? I responded that I had been fairly certain that Africa was a state, and that if it was not then it would not make sense to say common terms like “African-American,” as then being African would not make you automatically American.

Indubitably the conversation devolved to M and G mocking me for having thought that Africa would be apart of the United States. It became particularly bad when M said that what I had said was stupid, which obviously angered me, so I told him to shut up, cursed him out, and then remarked that him being a knowitall was the reason why no one liked him. M and G became really defensive after I said that, therefore I have seen neither of them since the argument. Since then, all of our mutual friends have been phoning me and saying I was rude.

On one hand, I feel that I may have been a bit harsh on them. On another hand, I have always considered myself a considerably intelligent person, so I think it rude and dishonest for M to insinuate that I am stupid. So, Reddit, AITA?"

Looking back on my first piece after a year of shitposting, the most striking part to me is that my work has gotten kinda sloppy over time. I put a lot of effort into my first post—here you can clearly see a well-defined character (well, more like a caricature, but in r/AITA terms they might as well be synonyms) which was carefully infused into the writing in a way that I unfortunately haven't been able to replicate since. I'm sure you noticed how pretentious I sounded throwing in clunky grammar and misusing words like "indubitably" and "therefore."

I also had a good bit of lore prepared—my character was eventually intended to whip out the fact that he was a member of Mensa as a last resort (as if that somehow excused thinking that Africa was a state in the US). Unfortunately, this is where I got a bit carried away with the commenting and eventually got my post taken down.

My personal favorite exchange in the comments was my third (and last!) comment here, which I think might have been what gave me away to the mods.

I learned from my mistakes that Africa is not a state in the US, and I now know that it is a country in its own right!

The thread got reposted to r/AmITheDevil, which is one of my main criteria for success in these stories. Most people there were calling me out as an obvious troll (one even dared to call me a low-effort troll, which I took particular offense to), as opposed to the maybe one or two comments on the original post calling it out as a shitpost.

Maybe I leaned into the dumb American stereotype too much, but I guess that's the whole point of these shitposts. Either way I still look back on it as a success, even if it did have some rougher aspects.

Anyway, my second post was more successful and was never removed (and even includes some DM action!) so I might post these out of order to let it stay up for a bit longer. Let me know if liked this, thought I was a pathetic loser with no life, or want to see more, or just generally what you think.

[memoirsofareddittroll]

So I figured I'd start this blog as a running archive of all the shitposts I've made on Reddit starting about a year ago. So far they've all been exclusive to r/AmITheAsshole, but who knows where I'll go in the future.