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cats will see you laying in bed crying and be like is anyone gonna sneeze on her and not wait for an answer
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Love when men order a "small black coffee." And I bet you wanna get fucked in the ass too huh
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The thing they don't tell you about fried egg runny yolk is that if you put it in a sandwich it will be the best most delicious thing and you can mop up the egg with the bread, but in exchange you Will get so so messy and covered in egg yolk
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it must feel good as hell when you’re a horse and you take a big bite out of an apple like ttshoke
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How To Tell Your Cat That You Could Walk To His Food Faster If He Weren't Weaving Under Your Fucking Feet In A Beautiful And Intricate Idiot's Ballet
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I just bought plantains at the store and the cashier was like “u know these aren’t bananas right” and I said yes and then she rang them in as Bok Choy.
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some notable catchphrases of 2013:
bitch I might be
do she got the booty ? she doooooooooo !
swiggity swag
the D
wen u mom com home and make hte spagehti
“ hello______, im dad “
AYYY LMAO
W R I T I N G I N T E N S E W O R D S L I K E T H I S
perfect _____ don’t exis-
And now, the weather
at least 2 potato
we’ve come full circle !
life hack :
[ __________ INTENSIFIES]
so many
such doge. much wow. very smile.
mahogany
*sweats nervously*
same.
spooper hot choclety milk
#SHERLOCKLIVES
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theres bikes around the city you can rent but you have to use an app that needs your drivers license. theres buses that drive right to your destination, but if you dont have change you need the app. you can wash your car here if you sign into the app. you can go to the bathroom here you just have to unlock it with the app that needs your location on. you can order at this restaurant if you scan the code and download the app. im losing my freaking mind
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In case you missed it, Gaara’s English voice actor Liam O’Brien dressed up as Gaara for Halloween ~
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