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mieldreams · 25 days ago

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lmaoo i had forgotten abt the patricia part since I added it later

patriciaaaaa patricia..... shoutout to all the patricias in frnd groups, love y'all

fyi patricia is inspired by something a girl actually said to me once, she was lowkey nice tho

APT.

Summary: Sleep tomorrow but tonight go crazy, all you gotta do is just meet me at the... Or where you and Anakin share an apartment and maybe – some feelings too?

pairing: college roommate!Anakin x reader

word count: 4,842

warnings: c'est dramatíque. like no joke this is very much for the sillies and fun. it also has modern slang so can probably be considered hella OC for a lot of characters. I mean can you imagine Padme saying babygirl? (oh how I wish 😞)

a/n: Y'all know how in fanfics there's some tropes that are cliches? I noticed how sometimes in a lot of the fandoms the male mcs always get to have these complex and flawed characters that often have bad habits and quirks but for some reason the reader character (especially if it's a female one) doesn't get as many personality traits (which valid considering reader character is after all an insert character) but i just thought how fun would it be to maybe reverse some of the roles and switch things around a lil bit. This story is relatively tame in that aspect as I was only experimenting, but I hope you enjoy anyway!

"Honey, I'm home!" Your playful voice carries through the empty living room of your shared apartment.

When you get no response from your roommate, who you were sure was supposed to be home by now, you drop the shoe from your hand, the thud sound echoing on the wooden flooring before you make your way towards the couch.

You drop your bag and toss your cap away, running a hand through your hair before heading towards the bedrooms.

"Ani?"

You walk into the open kitchen to grab a glass of water but your eyes get caught on the pot of something steaming kept on the stove. It's like there's a cartoonish floating scent of deliciousness that hooks your nose and beckons you closer, so you float over to the counter to lift the lid of the pot and a familiar and absolutely mouth-watering sight greets you.

A smile takes over your face when you realise who made it–the only person who can–and you drop the lid back on the pot to quickly head towards his bedroom.

"Anakin!" You call out once again and you're about to pass the door of the bathroom in the hallway when it flies open and you quickly have to stop yourself from running into the person stepping out.

"Oh shoots!" His hands immediately grab your waist to stop you from falling backwards while you grab his forearms to steady the two of you.

You didn't think it was possible, but somehow your smile grows even wider at the sight of your roommate – his tousled hair still wet from the shower, a soft baby blue hoodie on that made his eyes stand out that much more, and that same soft smile that always greeted you when you returned home.

"Thought you'd finally gotten sick of me and ditched and run away," you joke while trying not to pay attention to the feeling of his hands on your hips.

He rolls his eyes before leaning closer with narrowed eyes, "If you were even 2 minutes more late, I actually would've."

You're distracted by the feeling of his breath tickling your skin, eyes drawn to his pink lips that are pulled in a subtle pout. "….late?"

His brows furrow as he takes in your distracted expression and clueless words, his pout turning into a frown, "You don't remember, do you?"

The way he says it tells you he already knows the answer but you're still too caught up looking at his perfect plush lips. "…remember…?"

He quickly drops his hands and you stumble to catch your balance as he steps away to walk into the kitchen.

You follow him to stand on the other side of the counter and watch as he transfers the soup he had made into a smaller serving pot. It was a Skywalker family special, taught by his mom and your favourite soup in the whole world, though most of Anakin's cooking was your favourite in the whole world so some might call you biased. But they've never tasted Anakin's cooking so what the hell do they know?

"It's Friday." His back is still turned to you as he washes his hands at the sink but you don't have to see his face to know he's not exactly happy.

His words finally remind you of your usual weekend plans together, and today– Friday's was supposed to be movie night.

You wince when you realise you'd forgotten your plans, and now you've gone and run into him headfirst, literally.

"Ani…"

"No, it's okay."

You expected him to be mad, angry even, that you'd forgotten (or so he thinks) your ages-long tradition of movie night. But the sight of his tense shoulders relaxing as he sighs, drying his hands on the towel before he turns to you with that same sweet smile, a hopeful glimmer in his eyes is not what you're prepared for, much less the soft words that leave his lips,

"It's okay. I'm just glad you're here today and not busy like the past few times. I'm glad we finally get to have a movie night together again."

Fuck, the adorable smile he gives you is enough to knock the wind out of you and you desperately grab the edge of the counter to not fall to the ground.

He grabs a pack of bread and opens the fridge to grab a container before turning to the toaster, "I'm so glad we can do this. It's the perfect weather for soup so I made that instead of our usual popcorn, I hope you don't mind— though we can have that too if you want, I'm sure we have some leftover packs somewhere here—"

He excitedly rambles as he starts to open and close various cabinets to look for the packet of popcorn and you're frozen in place as you take in his enthusiasm.

"You know what, why don't you pick the movie while I toast some bread for us?"

Fuck, you hated to do this.

"We can have garlic or plain butter ones, whichever you want—"

You really wish you didn't have to do this.

"—Anakin...I can't."

All his flurried activity immediately comes to a halt. His shoulders tense again at your words and his hands are still as they hover in the air.

It's barely a whisper that reaches your ears, "What?"

This time you can see his side profile but you don't because you can't face him as you repeat yourself.

"I'm…sorry. I just— I already made plans. Padme and Satine said there's this party tonight…"

His head whips to fix you with the most intense gaze and you gulp as you try to come up with a way to maybe…compensate?

A nervous laugh bubbles out of your chest before you can stop it, "Ani, what if you come too? We can have tonight's hangout at the party! Obi-Wan and Rex might be there too, or else you can invite them! I know the people hosting it, I'm sure they'll allow a few extra people."

Extra people? Extra people?! Good doing dumbass. Extra people – like he's some random nobody and not the literal lo—

"Okay."

You're snapped out of your thoughts by his feeble response, as if you weren't meant to hear it. "What?"

He clears his throat, putting on an exaggerated smile that you can see through, "It's okay. We can just hangout some other time. Have fun at the party."

He walks out of the kitchen to his bedroom in the blink of an eye, closing the door behind him without another word.

Your shoulders drop with a sigh before you drop your head on the counter and close your eyes in frustration.

This is for the best, this is for the best, this is for the best, this is for the best.

The same chant repeats in your head as you pick up your jacket and put on your shoes, walking out the door with a heavy heart.

Half an hour into the party your heart seems to have only gotten heavier, you don't know if it's the fifth drink in your hand or the loud thumping music, or maybe it's the jacket that seems all too suffocating in the already stuffy room and this boring guy who's been talking your head off about women and horses or something….Jackson? Jason? Hanson!…or was it Hansel?

"It's Gretel. I told you Hansel is my twin sister. And I'm not gay." He gives you a nasty side-eye as he huffs and rolls his eyes.

Oh shit, had you said that out loud? Oh well whatever, how the hell were you supposed to remember Hansel was the girl and Gretel was the boy when your mind wasn't even in the room right now?

Thankfully your saviour arrives in the form of your friend dragging you away with some half-assed excuse about being a player short for their beer pong – not like the guy cared, he simply turned around and gave that same weird 'I think I'm more important than every person in this room and mayonnaise is the spiciest thing I've had in my life and I think khaki shorts and polos are the peak of fashion and women wearing makeup is literally the reason guys have trust issues but it doesn't matter cause my daddy's got enough money to take my date to a private pool so I can body shame her' smile to the girls standing behind him, the same creepy look he had given you and roped you into a conversation you hadn't heard a second of.

You step away from the kitchen bar where you'd been standing for the past 20 minutes.

"I wasn't lying about the game."

When you go to protest Padme immediately cuts you off, "Nope. You're playing, it's already decided."

You laugh, "By whom?"

"Me," she replies in that 'duh' sort of tone, "I can't let my best girl sit there sulking with some weirdo talking about some random old fairytale."

You smirk, "His parents named him Gretel."

She whips her head to look at you in disbelief before bursting out laughing, "Well I'm glad I pulled you away before he introduced you to his twin sister Hansel or something."

"Nah, he said she ran away with some guy named Pedro in France. I think he called her a slut but it almost sounded like he had a crush on Pedro himself so who knows." You shrug.

She scoffs and then laughs again, "How do you always manage to find such people?"

You walk towards the table in the centre of the room, "Do I manage to find such people or do they find me?" You shake your head with a laugh, "Anyway thanks for getting me out of that conversation."

"Of course. Can't have you betraying your loverboy can we?"

Her teasing smirk goes entirely unnoticed as you freeze at her words.

Padme, being ever observant as she is, immediately catches the way your face falls and quickly decides that she just has to find out what happened.

She already had her suspicions when you walked into the party looking like you had instead walked into a reunion with your dentist, your racist uncle and that one teacher from middle school who always picked on you for some reason.

She hadn't seen you this...blank since that time in high school when you'd taken part in a community marathon for charity to impress your crush and trained for months to cross the finish line first only to trip on your shoelaces as soon as the starting whistle blew. You fell right in front of your crush as an 80-year-old grandma overtook you who then won while you'd disassociated for the rest of the race.

She has to do something about this.

Then her eyes land on the shot glasses spread out on the table and she gets an idea.

No way she's gonna let a friend be so miserable at a party.

Anakin's…. well he's not sure what he feels.

Conflicted, sad, angry, confused….hurt? Yeah definitely that too – a whole lot of it.

This was the third time that you had ditched your weekly hangout plans and though you had definitely missed a few movie nights here and there before, be it due to exams or assignments you had procrastinated or that time when you convinced him to follow this small stray cat into the restricted forest area in your campus and the police showed up and the two of you had to spend majority of the night answering questions and you just stubbornly kept answering that it was the magic kitty of adventure and why wouldn't someone follow her and so they'd made you take a drug test because they thought you were high. With the exasperated look on the police officer's face as he let the two of you go, Anakin could only imagine the kind of answers you'd given him while on the other hand he had been worried shitless throughout his questioning.

He also remembers that as compensation you'd treated him to cheap cough drops flavoured popsicles from the only store that was open that late, and how he had laughed when you'd gagged and made a face after trying some of his ice cream and then how sincere your apology had been for wasting your night together.

He remembers how fast his heart had been beating when he heard your soft lips utter those words, 'your night together' is what you had called it. He wishes he could hear you say such sweet things about your relationship again. Like the first time you'd introduced him as your friend instead of roommate, and the even more exciting upgrade to 'best friend'.

Today, however, you said "extra people". Extra people. Is that all that he was in your life now? Just an extra? Not your best friend, not even your friend, just an extra? Some random person you wouldn't care if they were gone from your life?

The thought saddens him more than it makes him mad and that makes him feel even more stupid. Gosh look at how pathetic he was. You couldn't be bothered to remember your promises, or worse, you were purposefully avoiding him for the past few days like he suspected and here he was– having a pity party in your shared apartment that only taunted him with how unusually silent it was.

Damn this, if you got to just forget about your plans and go out and party like it meant nothing then he could too.

He puts away the soup he had prepared into the flask you usually use before placing it in the refrigerator with a sticky note that said 'heat this up and drink it when you get back, it'll spoil after morning'. He knew it was just an excuse and the soup could last much longer in the fridge, but he had read the weather alert for tonight and didn't want you to get sick like the last time you'd gotten soaked after running home in the rain and old habits die hard and it seems he just can't stop worrying about you even when he was mad at you.

He quickly swaps his sweats for some old jeans but doesn't bother changing his hoodie, if he has only one goal for going out then it wouldn't matter anyways. He catches sight of himself in the mirror in his bedroom which makes him pause for a second. He watches his reflection for a few moments, taking in the frown on his face and a certain emotion that reflects back in his eyes. He's not sure if the reflection is actually pale and blue or if it's just his mind projecting how he feels. He quickly shakes his head and walks back to the living room.

Then he finds his phone and quickly dials his longtime friend, the phone ringing only twice before being picked up.

He forgoes all pleasantries, "Rex. Remember that party you told me about? Yeah, is it still on? Ok good, can you send me the address real quick? Thanks."

He doesn't wait for a reply before he ends the call and puts on his shoes, grabbing his keys and then he's out the door without thinking more about it, or at least trying to.

Somehow the girls have roped you into this stupid drinking game. Well, drinking game for them, for you this just feels like punishment, for what you're not sure.

Maybe this is what you get for letting down Anakin the way you did tonight. You're sure this was the last straw and that he's never going to want to talk to you again. Hell, he could steal all your favourite festive edition oreos that you hoard annually and set fire to that matching sweater he knitted for you and break off your lease and run away with that hot goth chick that flirts with him at his job and you wouldn't even be able to get mad. After all, you're the one who's been running away and avoiding him like a coward, you're the one who's been constantly letting him down by cancelling your plans and going back to your old habits of partying and finding distractions where you can, you're the one that disappointed him again tonight.

You remember the way his face fell when you told him you'd be bailing on your plans again.

That brief expression of hurt on his face was still stuck in your head like a broken CD that gets jammed at one part and doesn't move forward or backwards and the same image just remains frozen on screen. It makes you feel haunted and that again makes you think about how one frown from him was enough to derail all your thoughts, so you can't even imagine how bad it would be if you actually told him the truth. You can't bear to think about the pitiful apologetic look he'd give if you spoke your heart's words, the way he'd say sorry like it was his fault, the way he'd probably want nothing to do with you anymore because he deserves better, because he's so sweet and so nice and so warm and–

snap snap

Padme's fingers hovering in front of your face let you know that you had spaced out once again and the worried expression on her face makes you shake your head with a quick apologetic laugh as you shove your hands forward to get everyone to start the next round. You avoid Padme's inquisitive gaze as all the girls chant the hook of the game before you call out a random number, though your stupid cursed brain ends up choosing Anakin's birthdate.

It somehow manages to bite you in the ass when your hand is the one that lands on top, meaning you have to be the one to take a shot. Well, you would have had to, but since Padme had noticed the number of drinks you'd already had, she forbade you from taking any more, instead encouraging you to switch it out with juice to help you sober up.

Well, you seem to be pretty sober now if that same heaviness in your chest and disinterest in everything around you are anything to go by.

Padme, as always, notices this and blurts out a question (a suspicion more like) that's been on her mind ever since you made a beeline to the drinks right after walking into the party.

You pick up the shot glass with the juice and quickly down it like it was actually alcohol. It felt wrong to sit here drinking and playing and having fun. In the midst of your sulking, you don't notice the look shared between Padme and Satine.

"Truth – what happened with Anakin?"

Oh right, when the girls protested about letting you off easy, Padme had very cleverly suggested the added twist of truth or dare along with taking shots (juice for you). And now that you've finally ended up with your hand at the very top she was going to take her chance.

You almost spit the drink back out at Padme's words, sputtering as you try to wipe the juice before it stains your shirt.

You laugh nervously, "What happened with Anakin?"

Quickly your smile drops, replaced by an expression of serious inquisition, "Wait, what happened with Anakin? Is he okay? Did something happen? Did he call?—"

Padme rolls her eyes but shares an amused look with the rest of the girls.

"No, you tell us what happened with Anakin. You've been miserable all evening, it's worse than when that dude beat you and won the personality contest in the first year."

"Okay— first of all, he looked like a soft-boiled egg and sounded like a whale giving birth. He only won because his daddy was friends with the contest hosts." You huff, "second of all, I get to choose truth or dare and I'm not choosing truth."

"Hmm, too bad. It's already chosen for you and you know we're not moving on till you answer."

You loved your girlfriends for how much they cared but sometimes it was such a pain in the ass.

You raise a brow, "Are you holding me hostage over a question?"

She challenges you with a question of her own, "Are we going to have to go about this the difficult way?"

Did you want to cross paths with a very determined Padme who's already had at least 6 shots in her? (she was, funnily enough, a sore loser in this game, and it would have been entertaining if it weren't for your current situation)

You sigh, lowering your gaze to your fingers, toying with the loose fibres on your jeans, "Anakin and I…fought again."

Padme places a comforting hand on your shoulder, "What happened?"

You drop your head into your hands with a groan, "I bailed on our movie night plans again…"

Suddenly you feel the thump of a pillow hitting your bent head, startling you. You look up to see Satine holding another pillow, as if ready to launch once again.

"What the fuck?"

She startles you once again with the intensity in her voice, "Girl, what the hell?!"

You scrunch your face in confusion, "I mean, that's what I just asked—"

"No, I mean what. the. hell."

All the girls have gone silent, turning their heads from you to Satine as she speaks up once again.

"Why would you do that?!"

"Huh?? You're the one that threw the pillow at me!"

"No— why would you ditch Anakin to come here, dumbass?!"

"Because…you asked me to?"

Padme sighs but remains silent as she watches the exchange between you and Satine.

"So if Padme or I asked you to jump off a bridge—"

You shrug, "Yeah, probably."

Now Satine is the one to drop her head in her hands, pinching the bridge of her nose before taking a deep breath.

This time Padme puts her arm on Satine's shoulder, giving it a squeeze before speaking up, "I think what Satine's trying to say is, how long are you going to pretend?"

You avoid her eyes with a nervous laugh, "Whaaa— pretend? Pfttt I'm not pretending, what uh—what would I be pretending about?"

You look around the group and see that all your girls are looking at you with a 'bish, be fr' look.

You finally groan out, "Ugh, okay — fine! Fine! I'm in love with my roommate and I don't know how to tell him— or if I should even bother telling him at all because it's not like it's going to get us anywhere. Dude is literally handcrafted by the angels and every time I look at his face I'm reminded that this is impossible. Every time I even think about telling him the truth it feels like the stupidest thing ever because— well because why would he go for me when he can have someone so much better? Why would he ever go for a girl like me when he's got that discount Dimitriscu, I mean y'all have seen her— she's tall AND goth, the total package." You look up to see all the girls contemplating before nodding in agreement about the hot goth girl and it does not make you feel any better.

Padme widens her eyes and shoots a look at your girlfriends and they quickly shake their heads. One of them speaks up, stuttering through an awkward laugh, "But don't worry — you're gorgeous too!"

Another girl chimes in right after, "Y-yeah, I mean, you can be – you can be pretty emo and bitchy too, you know?"

All of you turn your heads to look at the redhead girl who just spoke, staring at her with blank faces, making her cower behind the couch pillow in her hands with a mumbled apology.

"Thanks, Patricia." You sigh, "Anyways, it's no use."

Padme rushes to answer you, "Don't say that. What if Anakin does like you? You've been roommates for so long, the two of you are best friends. And I truly don't think Anakin is so cruel to treat you horribly even if you did tell him."

You raise your head to fix her with a half-assed glare, "Padme, the thought of confessing is already enough to make me wanna puke. Do not make me think of his inevitable rejection."

Satine finally breaks her silence, "Why are you so sure that he could never like you?"

You let out a bitter laugh, "Because."

"Because why?"

"Because we could just never be, okay? We are just not like that— Anakin and I together would be a— a fucking joke." You huff out.

"Have you seen him? Have you seen me? You know what he's like. Do you really think we could ever be a thing?"

The sound of a beer bottle dropping to the floor rings out behind you but you pay it no mind, it was a crowded party, maybe someone just ran into someone and dropped their can.

You rub your eyes to try and get rid of the stinging behind them only to lift your head and see all your girlfriends staring right behind you with their eyes wide.

Padme, who had been distracted trying to think of some way to get you to stop being so stupid and pessimistic also turns her head when she realises how silent the group had suddenly become, all staring off to somewhere behind you.

It is only when you hear her gasp as well that you finally snap, "What? Seriously what is it? Is someone in a slutty santa costume twerking to MLK's 'I have a dream' speech again?"

When she doesn't answer, you huff and crane your neck to see for yourself. Your breath hitches in your throat as soon as you catch sight of the person standing just a few feet behind the couch you were sitting on.

Neither of you say anything, but Anakin's brows furrow, you open your mouth to say something, anything, but before you can get a word out he quickly takes a few steps back, spinning on his heels to rush towards the exit.

"Anakin!—"

You quickly get up to follow him, struggling to keep up with his fast pace in the already crowded room. Curse him and his model-like long legs.

"Ani, whatever you heard, whatever you think you heard— it's not like that—"

"Maybe I was dense, but I'm not deaf."

Through the windows you can see the shadow of dark storm clouds gathering.

"No, no— you're not deaf and you're most definitely not dense—"

He suddenly comes to a stop and you nearly crash into his back before he spins around to face you. He lets out a bitter laugh, "I was stupid then."

Loud thunder crackles outside.

You shake your head vehemently, "No, Ani—"

"You hate me."

His face lights up in a bright lightning flash.

"I don't hate you—"

"You said this," he points between the two of you, "is a joke." If you weren't so frenzied and caught up in your own panic you would've noticed that the hurt in his voice largely overshadowed the anger.

You desperately try to explain, becoming more and more aware of the growing crowd around you but honestly, you couldn't give two shits about that right now, "If you knew what I was talking about you'd think so too—"

He fixes you with a sad gaze, "This is why you've been avoiding me all these days?"

When you struggle to meet his eyes he already knows your answer.

He scoffs and starts walking backwards, "I don't want to hear anymore." And you get one last look at him before another bright flash of lightning lights up the sky and then everything goes dark.

The whole house falls quiet and the two of you stand there, blinking at each other in complete silence before someone's voice calls out from the opposite corner of the room.

"Aw man, the power's gone!"

Anakin takes advantage of the darkness and quickly turns around to weave through the crowd.

You desperately call out his name again as you almost push and shove people out of the way because you can't even see where you're going, just following the vague direction of where you think the exit is, "Ani—"

He only quickens his pace, nearly jogging out the door and down the footsteps of this cursed frathouse that you should've never bothered coming to.

Well too late to realise that, huh.

Just as you cross the doorway and jump over the steps to run up to the sidewalk, he's already disappearing out of sight by crossing the road to take a right.

You stand there on the side of the road, chest aching and you're not sure if it's from the sudden exercise or something else.

It's like you're frozen in place, you want to run after him but your feet seem to be stuck to the ground. Only when you hear the sound of more footsteps behind you do you turn.

You see Padme, Satine and the rest of your girls in the doorway, more people crowding behind to see the commotion.

You look at Padme, your brows scrunched in uncertainty.

You wait for a beat, then two. Thunder rumbles in the distance.

"Go get your man, girl!"

That's all you need to hear before you set off running after him, the cheers of your girlfriends echoing behind you in the silent neighbourhood.

divider by @enchanthings-a

a/n: like I said, it's silly and maybe a liiil melodramatic but I had sm fun painting this world in my head, and I hope you enjoyed looking into a part of it!

Pt 2 will be up on Valentine's.

spoiler, next chapter she's going to do this:

haha just kidding.

unless

#that's way too many patricias #is patricia plural just patricia?#then is the singular patricium?#see above gif

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mieldreams · 29 days ago

Text

Pure Imagination

Summary: Come with me and you'll be in a world of pure imagination

or where Vader delivers sweet torture in cruel dreams

pairing: Darth Vader x reader

word count: 4,912

warnings: smut smut smut, minors DNI (as the title suggests, dream stuff and I'm not too sure abt how comprehensible this is ngl), inappropriate use of the force etc.

a/n: 5k of pure filth, wasn't actually planning on releasing this cuz I wrote it so long ago but...oh well. it's the first time I'm posting a full fledged smut fic, hope y'all like

masterlist

You're in a rare deep slumber when you hear it, the unmistakable mechanical inhales and exhales coming from a dark silhouette in your mind. “You again.” That almost droid-like voice is hard to misidentify and all your senses freeze at once. Panic builds inside you but on the outside, you somehow remain asleep. “Vader? What the fuck?” You weren't exactly unfamiliar with the infamous Sith lord, having run into him on more occasions than you'd like, which established you on at least a ‘he can recognise me by face’ basis – much to your displeasure. But why in the kriffing hell were you hearing his voice in your mind right now? Hadn't you just gone to sleep? Fuck, had Vader found your secret base and infiltrated it? Had he taken you hostage and was he planning on torturing you through his weird mind fuckery? “Your inability to comprehend the ways of the Force does not make it absurd or a deception.” His hoarse voice echoes in your mind once again and you scoff. “Do not patronize me in my own mind. What the fuck do you want? Why are you here?” “You tell me, Rebel.” He spits out the word like it's venomous and putrid. You're losing patience, you're not sure what is happening – last time you checked you were supposed to be asleep in your room, so how was Vader manipulating your mind? “Your mind could be penetrated in my sleep, though I doubt I'd find anything of use.” His voice booms, emotionless as always, “However, it seems you have something rather interesting to show me.” You're starting to get pissed off by this giant fucking leather-wrapped tin can. “Hmmm, your tongue is sharp. If only the same could be said about your intellect.” He spits out, “After all, which perfect little rebel would want something like this.” Suddenly, an image flashes in your mind and your face immediately pales, appalled by what appears before you. In a quick flash you see yourself, lying on your back, goosebumps spreading across your skin as your bare breasts stiffen in the air. You hear your laboured breathing; see the way your chest heaves up and down. And then, you see him. The Darth Vader – in between your legs. His head over your most intimate area. You don't see his face, and the image cuts off right below his shoulders, but the way you're clutching him, pulling him in, and the way his head moves, the way your legs quiver and the way your mouth remains dropped open in pleasure very well lets you know what is going on. You gasp, your own horrified voice echoing in your mind, “What the fuck is this? What the fuck are you doing to me?” His tone would be teasing if he were speaking with his natural voice, “Would you like me to give a descriptive narration?” You growl, “What are you trying to do? Some new perverted mind trick your kind have come up with?” Despite the angry words thrown at him, on the inside you feel terrified. Because where even is this ‘him’? You're shouting at him in your mind but he isn't appearing to you. Just his hollow voice echoing endlessly in your brain with seemingly no origin. “Do not forget your place, Rebel.” It seems you have pissed him off now, or whatever weird body-less voice version of him at least, great. “These fantasies are a creation of your mind. Not so much a perfect rebel now, are we?” You're not going to just let him bullshit his way into your mind no matter what. “Your lies won't work on me.” “You think this is a lie?” He flashes the same image in your head again. This time you appear even more desperate in the filthy act he shows you, hips moving wildly as you moan and pull his head closer to your cunt. “A pity you fight against the want. Your subconscious betrays you.” “You're a kriffing liar!”

“Silence!” His voice booms in your head and you flinch. “A lie? You think I am lying? What about this?” Quickly the image changes, this time showing a close-up of your most intimate parts. Heat pours into your cheeks while anger burns through your veins. A black gloved hand comes into the frame, teasingly snaking up your thigh to caress your folds. You watch, frozen in horror, as it catches your clit, rubbing circles on the nub before dipping lower to tease at the slit. It does this a bunch of times till your empty hole is pulsating in demand, all the while your desperate little pants and whines colour the background. “Vader– want you inside me, please...” Your voice echoes through the dream. The hand, his hand, gently smacks your cunt to silence you before two of his long, gloved fingers enter you. Even through the image you can tell that they are thick, and to your surprise they move slowly at first, yet expertly, delivering deep thrusts that send shivers up your spine. “Stop this! Stop it! Why are you doing this?” You scream at him and his angry voice answers, “Why? Isn't this what you want? Isn't this what your body craves? Or do you still think this is a lie?” The image before you quickly shifts again, this time showing his fingers moving fast and hard inside you. He removes them to rub and pinch at your clit, before pressing on your slit again, this time with three fingers. “What do you want from me? Stop this! You're lying!” “Is that so?” The three fingers swiftly plunge into you, this time your loud moan sounds and your own hand comes into the picture, grabbing his wrist, holding him there. Vader's voice taunts you in your mind, “So this isn't what you want?” You watch as his hand quickly shakes yours off and the same hand that was inside you delivers a loud slap to your cunt, your hips jerking up in reaction but Vader's other hand pins them down. He delivers another wet slap to your cunt, then another and another, each one getting messier and messier as you get wetter and wetter. His fingers finally enter you again and it doesn't take long before you're gushing your release all over his hand. He prolongs your high by rubbing on your already sensitive clit and it has the dream-you begging, “Vader, please...” You shout in your head once again, “What the fuck is wrong with you? Stop this! Get out of my head!” “Do not assume that I am here by pleasure,” he clearly means to taunt you more, alluding to the embarrassing state you just saw yourself in, “it is your mind projecting this.” If you could, you would stab him. “So tell me, Rebel, am I to believe this is not something you want?” “I don't care what the fuck you believe. Get. out. of my fucking head.” He continues, “So you wouldn't want me to do this?” Out of nowhere, you feel a small pressure on your neck, one that steadily grows, as if someone were holding you by the throat. You panic – you had heard about the Sith Lord's preferred method of quickly disposing of his enemies – choking the life out of them as their flailing bodies struggled to get enough oxygen, limbs convulsing and face paling till they eventually died. He was going to kill you in your sleep. Your mind is on high alert, yet your body remains unconscious in bed. “Tell me, Princess, what does your body tell you.” “—If you think that is not enough, what about this?”

The next image he projects in your mind absolutely destroys you. You see your bare back facing you in the fantasy, though your torso is not enough to hide Vader's wide built silhouette in front of you. You are straddling him, but this time too the image is cut off just below your waist. However it doesn't take a genius to figure out what is going on when you can so clearly see the way your body moves on top of his, swivelling your hips sensually as you move up and down. The way your back arches, the way you cling to him, nails digging into the leather over his chest, the breathy moans that escape you. The you in the image grabs Vader's gloved hand and places it on your throat and the real you – or at least your consciousness in your mind gasps in mortification. “How scandalous. The proper princess of the rebellion wants me.” He mocks, “worse, she wants me to want her.” This whole time you had been angry, mad at the evil Sith Lord for showing you these lies – these perverted images that you don't understand the purpose of. What is he trying to achieve? Does he hope to shame you? Provoke you? Therefore weaken your mind's resolve and obtain some information from you? But then you watch yourself in the fantasy – your hips quickening their pace as your breathy moans become raspier and louder, Vader's huge hand roams your naked back, running the middle finger of his gloved palm down your spine before moving to your front again. He caresses your breasts, toying with them and it makes the dream-you mewl. Suddenly the Vader in the projection grabs your hips, stopping your movements entirely, making you whine. He lands a stern slap on your ass in warning before pulling you in by your waist, guiding your arms from his chest to lay over his shoulders.

You can only stare in horror and regretfully–arousal, as Vader takes full control, thrusting up into you with such precision it has you screaming. You still cannot see anything below your waists and yet the lewd sounds that now echo in your mind, mixed with your own traitorous mouth chanting his name in pleasure, asking him, begging him to make you cum, has a certain humiliating warmth pooling in your centre. You want to look away, you want him to stop showing you these cursed dreams – but you have no idea how. The images are directly showing in your head and Vader doesn't seem to actually be in your room. So how do you stop this? Before you get to shout at him again, the previous pressure on your neck, one that you had nearly forgotten about, grows stronger again, pressing more on your throat till you can hear your own heartbeat echoing in your head. You realise then that the pressure on your throat is definitely not something imagined and that somehow, Vader was actually choking you physically in your sleep. Were you wrong about your assumptions? Had Vader really somehow broken into your quarters? But the others would know. They'd wake you – they'd try to stop him. Wouldn't they? Or had they all already tried – and failed to stop him. Is that why you could physically feel his hands on your throat? “You think too much.” His voice echoes after a long time, “Tell me, Princess – after everything I've shown you – do you still dare to think of this as a deception?” You don't know what to say, you have always wished for Darth Vader's defeat in every battle you have been a part of, always hoped that the tyrannical rule he was a part of would end. And yet you also knew that there was something weird– something wrong here. Every time you had encountered the Sith Lord you had felt an odd sort of feeling in your mind, as if something was amiss. You had always been wary of the force-users and weren't entirely convinced of its powers– or better yet, its presence in the universe. Yet every time you ran into Vader, you had always felt a certain presence in your being – like a pull, a connection that wasn't quite complete. Like two wires of a running circuit that occasionally rubbed together and created sparks. But what does it mean? What does any of this mean? You still cannot believe that whatever Vader showed you was some sort of prediction of the future. However, he told you that it was your mind that projected this.

But can you believe him? You would scream and fight and argue that he's a cruel perverted liar and that none of this is true. But then why is there a part of you that suddenly feels heavy with need? You almost want to strangle yourself when you realise the wetness in your pants. And you suppose you really should just jump off a cliff when you realise that Vader can and probably is reading your mind right now. “I do not need to read your mind to know your desperation, Rebel.” Or maybe you could throw him off one instead. “While it would surely be amusing to see you attempt, right now, Princess, tell me – are you still convinced that all I've shown you is a deception?” With his words he slowly moves the pressure down your neck, tracing your collarbones to your breasts, cupping them as if they were naked. He fondles them, pinching and pulling and you whimper. “—that you don't want this?” His hands ghost down your torso, caressing your hips before moving further south. You freeze when you feel him slip below the waistband of your pants, going lower and lower before stopping right at your slit – the same way he had in the vision he showed you. He mimics the same actions from the fantasy on your body – running his fingers up and down teasingly before pausing on your clit to rub slow circles. “Tell me to stop, Princess.” He slips his fingers lower again to put pressure on your slit without actually slipping inside and you're not sure how to answer him. You want him to stop because this cannot be right – you already don't know how he's even doing this, and surely you don't want to fuck Vader? But then you don't want him to stop because the expertise with which he's teasing your tits and rubbing your clit is making it hard to think. Vader can tell that you're at the edge of your limits. He flashes all the images he's shown you once again, repeating them in your head as he lures you, “Look,” he can tell that you're trying to fight him, trying to break off his connection and stop him from showing you these visions. Too bad he's a Sith Lord and much better at controlling. Brats like you really need to be tamed. “I said look.” The images flash much quicker now, all of them with you naked and begging for Vader to take you. He uses the force to toy with your body once again – phantom lips kiss their way from the corner of your mouth and up your jaw to nibble at the sensitive spot right under your ear. He shows you your own face in the visions where you climax in his mouth, on his fingers, on his cock – your mouth dropped, brows scrunched and naked chest heaving as you whine and moan. He makes you listen to your own screams of pleasure, of begging – begging to give you his cock, to let you cum, to do it all over again.

The real Vader puts a steady thrumming pressure on your clit, one that would've had you immediately buckling at the knees if you weren't still asleep in your bed. You can't help the whimper that escapes you. “Vader, please...” You feel ashamed when you find yourself repeating the words from the dream, though you're not sure if you're pleading him to stop or asking for more. “What's the matter, Princess? Surely a proud rebel like yourself wouldn't want a Sith Lord?” His voice continues mocking you as the humming pressure turns into full vibrations over your clit and that combined with the way he pinches your nipples has you melting against your own wishes. Or is it? Is this really against your own wishes? You can lie to him, but can you really lie to yourself? And it seems Vader's presence in your mind is as attentive as ever as he soon questions. “Tell me to stop. You said I was lying – so why aren't you stopping me?” Vader can feel the steady build of a climax in you, you are right at the brink and he can tell that all it would take is one push to send you over the edge. Suddenly, he stops all his actions. Every way he was touching you–it all disappears in a second. It happens so quickly it's like your body gets whiplash. You feel naked despite the fact that your body is still fully clothed and tucked in bed. You sob, “Vader—” “What is it, Princess?” When your own inner turmoil keeps you silent he continues his provocation, “Surely, you do not want me–a Sith Lord, to fuck you?” He mocks with a surprised tone. “Surely you do not want something like this,” he once again flashes another image in your head. This time you're on your back again, fully naked, but the sight doesn't shock you after all that you have seen in the past few minutes. Your hair is strewn over the surface, nipples hard as your half-lidded eyes twinkle up at him, a teasing smile pulls on your lips as your nails dig into Vader's stomach, dragging them up before spreading your palms over his chest. You tug him to you, and Vader's wide frame covers your body.

He is still clothed and his cloak falls over his shoulders to drape over the two of you. You watch as he squeezes your throat, but unlike the panic that grows in you every time you feel Vader's hands over your neck, the you in the dream smiles. She smiles and puts her hand over his as if encouraging him and fuck that shouldn't make you drip even more but it does. Vader shuffles back a little and for the first time in all of the visions he's shown you do you get to see any part of him. The real parts. And it's his cock – thick and long, slightly curved–and heavy. Heavy as you watch yourself take him in your palms, heavy as Vader slips his hand under yours to pin your wrists above you before thumping his cock on your button, making you whimper. Heavy as he runs it up and down your slit before he hooks the fat head in your hole. The dream you hums in pleasure as Vader's thick cock parts your walls, except suddenly he stops. He stops halfway in, running his possessive hands up and down your hips and legs. The pause makes you whine, instinctually clenching around him to pull him deeper and it almost knocks the breath out of Vader. He leaves a stinging hand print on your ass as a reminder to behave before one of his hands comes down to where the two of you are joined. Watching his hands–it makes you think. Even during such an intimate act Vader never takes off his gloves, in fact he doesn't even take off his clothes. In every dream you have seen tonight he is always fully clothed and it almost makes you yearn to see what he actually looks like. The dream you was always busy being fucked senseless by Vader but you couldn't stop wondering about how he was underneath all that leather. How would it feel if he were to touch you, really touch you. Would his hands be warm to touch? Or would they be as cold as his voice? Your contemplation doesn't last long as that same vibrating pressure grows stronger on your clit, just as the pleasure blooms in your core. Every time Vader touches you, really touches you–with whatever weird sexual Force abilities he possesses, your mind goes entirely blank. It's like he quickly takes over every string controlling your body and all you can do is give in. You give in as Vader cups your sex and palms your throat–it's as if he's right there behind you, broad chest to your back, slow and deep breaths exhaled right next to your ear, tickling you and somehow arousing you further. When you start getting fussy he tightens his grip on your throat, “Watch.” He commands before directing your attention to what he's projecting in your mind. You stare in embarrassment and arousal as the dream Vader first makes you come on his tip, using his fingers to pinch and pull and rub on your clit, pushing you to your high till you're pulsing around the head of his cock. It makes him dig his nails into your plush thighs, slick fingers moving up to grip your ass and lift your hips up to use for his pleasure. Vader pulls out of you to tease you again. You had been whining the entire time he was playing with your body and it entirely distracted you from the way Vader was actually toying with you in reality. Or was this all a dream too?

Your thoughts are cut off as Vader lines his thick fingers to your slit, circling and circling till you're dripping and surely staining your pants. Your hips move on their own to get him to finally push inside. You're embarrassed but also glad that you have separate quarters and that you sleep alone. “You want it that bad, Princess?” His deep voice rumbles in your mind. Wasn't the bastard supposed to be able to read your mind? You don't answer, instead, you try to reach out to whatever it was Vader was using to toy with you, focusing in your mind on that odd sensation that seems to be the source of all this. Maybe it's Vader's own distracted nature that allows you to sense his presence so quickly in the Force, especially when he doesn't do anything to stop you as you reach out to him, to the feeling of him. You connect to his presence, as if gently caressing the very fabric of his being. It feels somewhat weird; you've never done anything like it before. It feels like you're weaving yourself into him as you concentrate on the feeling of him in your mind. Even his presence feels intimidating–strong and dark, imposing and fearful. Yet, you reach out, gently, a little unsure but determined to get him to do something, anything.

You wonder why Vader isn't doing anything to stop you, especially when you know he can, being all-powerful and all that. Did he want this just as much as you? Your contemplation is cut short as you feel a steady pressure on your entrance and you throw your head back, thinking fucking finally. You think you hear something like a deep chuckle echoing in your mind before the same dream from before flashes at the forefront again. This time, dream Vader lines his cock up with your hole just as you feel the force touch grow stronger on your cunt, and simultaneously you watch as Vader's cock swiftly enters you and you feel a thick length bury deep inside. A loud moan echoes in your mind and you can't tell if it was the dream you or you. This time Vader doesn't waste a second before he starts thrusting, both in the dream and inside you. You watch as Vader fucks you fast and hard and feel as the heavy girth parts your walls, before pulling back to deliver sharp and precise thrusts, making you feel so full that it steals your breath and renders you speechless. “Hmm, nothing to say now, Princess? No accusations of lies or deception?” When you say nothing Vader slows down his pace, again both in the dream and in you, and this time even if the dream you says anything it goes completely unheard as you whine out. After watching yourself come apart so many times, hearing your whines and begs, the lewd sounds of fucking, you were downright aching, desperate to have your want fulfilled and your cunt stuffed. “Tsk, tsk tsk, such filthy wants you have, Princess.” His mocking voice booms, “and here I thought you wanted me defeated and dead.” You did, you swear you did, just....after you were done with whatever this was. Because fuck Vader feels so good inside you, so big and so deep, especially as he grinds into you without pulling out. In the haze of your pleasure you barely notice Vader picking up pace again and in retaliation he delivers a slap to your ass and it's so much worse. It's so much worse because it feels so so good, your hole pulsating around nothing desperately. “Watch.” He echoes the same word again as he forces you to concentrate on the dream he's showing you. It's a struggle to focus as Vader expertly fucks you into the mattress, pleasure coursing through your veins as he hits that deep spot inside you again and again. It becomes so much more difficult when he makes you watch the way he fucks you, the way his broad frame covers you entirely, practically dwarfing you, the way you greedily swallow him, stretched to your limits as his thick cock thrusts into you – hard and fast, not showing any mercy. Holy shit, you realise, Vader was showing you how he would fuck you, and he's making you feel how he would fuck you. All without fucking you at all.

He's ruining you, absolutely ruining you as the lewd sounds of him thrusting hard and deep into your wet pussy echo in your mind. As sweat runs down your forehead, as your chest heaves, and as your cunt leaks and leaks, surely ruining your sleepwear. As you sob in pleasure and you can’t even tell if it’s from the dream or you.

You feel the pressure on your neck return and it makes you heady, your eyes roll to the back of your head as Vader toys with your clit again, not faltering in his pace of fucking you.

You’re barrelling towards the edge at record speed, but you would never admit to Vader that no one’s ever fucked you this good, not even the best sex of your real life came close to whatever Vader was doing to you now.

Did you feel guilty about it? Immeasurably so. But it wasn’t at the front of your mind when you could also feel the way you were so close. So so close – just one more deep thrust, just one more flick of your button, just one squeeze of your throat and you’d be—

Suddenly every bit of touch disappears from your body.

The long length inside you is no longer there, the wide palm on your bare throat has vanished and the thrumming pressure on your clit has faded into nothing.

You can’t help the cry that escapes you, calling out his name in desperation.

There is no reply. You writhe on the bed, your desperation showing in the way your knuckles protrude as you fist the bedsheet, your hips squirming and cunt pulsing in need for what was so cruelly stolen from you.

You quickly sit up as your mind awakes and your eyes shoot open. Your quick pants are the only sound you can hear in the pin drop silence of your separate quarters.

Your voice is shaky as you call out, “V-Vader?”

Still no reply. You let your head fall into your hands, a silent sob escaping you as you come down from the high. Your cheeks feel warm, in fact, your whole body feels on fire and you just can’t seem to get enough air into your lungs.

The tears that slip down your face, dry and cool your heated skin but it’s not enough.

Every encounter with Vader always made you feel like something was missing, and tonight that feeling’s stronger than ever, carving out a chunk of your being and wringing your stomach into knots.

You feel hollow. Unsure. Unsafe. And yet you want to forget all of this. There is no physical evidence of anything other than your ruined underwear that you’re more than willing to ignore. Maybe this was all just a dream. A very very bad dream. Nothing more.

Just as you’re about to chalk this all up to some weird way of the universe fucking with you, a deep inhale echoes in your mind.

“The temple is where our business will be finished.”

And just like that you’re once again left alone in the silent darkness of the room.

a/n: welp folks, here we have it. weird way to say it ig but happy star wars day! may the force be with you

(ignore that this is a day late and also absolutely not proofread, both becuz tumblr was being a bitch and I lost this fic like 6 times and I almost don't care anymore lol)

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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finally watched lisa frankenstein. cinema is back.

#dumpster discussions

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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okay maybe this has been said before

but does anyone else see the similarities bw kim rossi stuart and hayden christensen? like to me, they could've played brothers

it's like same template different font? idk

#KRS in 4th pic lowkey reminds me of clone wars ani ngl #hayden christensen #anakin skywalker #kim rossi stuart #when i put them side by side they appear different #but when i only look at KRS he does look really similar #anakin's equally hot angsty older brother lol #misc

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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Hayden Christensen AND Diego Luna??? Disney knows what's uppp

HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN and DIEGO LUNA Attends the Disney Upfront 2025 in New York City, New York on May 13, 2025.

#I love these 2 together so much

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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okay, question:

do you guys prefer to read stuff with hayden christensen's other characters? like if there was a (hypothetical) fic with a character other than Anakin would y'all read that? or do you guys prefer the name Anakin skywalker but his appearance can be of some other character? (eg: what I've done for JEI and APT)

#does the ques even make sense #lol i hope it does #it's cuz i just realised i have literally not written anything long format for anyone other than anakin #hayden christensen #anakin skywalker x reader #sam monroe x reader #clay beresford x reader #sam monroe #clay beresford #james kelly

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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sometimes baby girl is a 44 year old man

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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so freaking adorable *cries*

“Sleepy mornings”

pairing: sleepy!sam x f!reader

contains: fluff!

a/n: thought of this while scrolling through Pinterest prompts lol

divider credit: @sister-lucifer

Sam Monroe had finally convinced his mom to let you sleepover. Your parents didn’t mind, and it’s not like Sam’s mom didn’t like you, she loved you. She just knew her son and how a teenage boy’s mind worked. But he had finally convinced her to let you sleepover. Rules were implied, of course. Lots of rules.

You had just woken up, and Sam’s arms were wrapped around you tight, softly snoring. The only way Sam convinced his mom for you guys to sleep in the same bed was if the door was open and he slept over the comforter. You smiled at the peaceful look on his face. He didn’t have any makeup on so it made his features look more innocent, even more peaceful.

You traced his eyebrows, the tiny scars on his face, his nose, his cheekbone, his jaw… lightly enough to where he didn’t wake up.

Sam’s mother walked in the open door, smiling warmly at you. “I cooked breakfast if you want some.”

Hell yeah you wanted some. But when you tried to get up, Sam grunted and tugged you back to the bed. “No.” He whines.

“Sam, I’m starving. Let’s go eat.”

“No, let’s go back to sleep.” He protests, eyes still closed.

“Sam, your mom cooked breakfast for everyone. Be nice and come eat.”

“Just one more hour.”

“No.”

“Lay with me. Please.” He groans, finally opening his eyes to give you that soft look that always worked.

“Fine.” You huff, laying back down. You acted like you hated it, but you weren’t complaining. Sam was warm and a big cuddler, even if he denied it, so it was cozy.

“Mmm.” Sam hums contently, peppering your cheeks with a few kisses before nuzzling into his pillow. “I’m so tired it’s not even funny.”

“I’m wide awake.” You say. For now.

You felt wide awake and Sam was already dozing off, so you had nothing to do. Until you spotted the clothing magazines on Sam’s nightstand.

While you opened the magazine, Sam lay his head on your chest and dragged one of your hands to his hair.

You chuckle softly at his actions but play with his hair with one hand and flip through the magazine with the other.

Soon enough you heard Sam’s soft snoring again. You were definitely not wide awake because five minutes later the magazine slipped from your hands and you were snoring too.

taglist: @anakinstwinklebunny @haydenismyman @anisangeldust @cassielunaaa @madsluvsdilfs @mvst4far @divineani

#need me a sleepy sammy fr

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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More pics of baby Hayden 🥰🥰

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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he's soooo

rare photos of 𝐇𝐀𝐘𝐃𝐄𝐍 𝐂𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐍 pt.8

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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#op this is so gorgeous I have no words #sooooo many ideas in my head #screaming crying throwing myself against a wall #OBSESSED #anakin skywalker #art

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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Pure Imagination

Summary: Come with me and you'll be in a world of pure imagination

or where Vader delivers sweet torture in cruel dreams

pairing: Darth Vader x reader

word count: 4,912

warnings: smut smut smut, minors DNI (as the title suggests, dream stuff and I'm not too sure abt how comprehensible this is ngl), inappropriate use of the force etc.

a/n: 5k of pure filth, wasn't actually planning on releasing this cuz I wrote it so long ago but...oh well. it's the first time I'm posting a full fledged smut fic, hope y'all like

masterlist

You feel the pressure on your neck return and it makes you heady, your eyes roll to the back of your head as Vader toys with your clit again, not faltering in his pace of fucking you.

Suddenly every bit of touch disappears from your body.

The long length inside you is no longer there, the wide palm on your bare throat has vanished and the thrumming pressure on your clit has faded into nothing.

You can’t help the cry that escapes you, calling out his name in desperation.

You quickly sit up as your mind awakes and your eyes shoot open. Your quick pants are the only sound you can hear in the pin drop silence of your separate quarters.

Your voice is shaky as you call out, “V-Vader?”

The tears that slip down your face, dry and cool your heated skin but it’s not enough.

Every encounter with Vader always made you feel like something was missing, and tonight that feeling’s stronger than ever, carving out a chunk of your being and wringing your stomach into knots.

Just as you’re about to chalk this all up to some weird way of the universe fucking with you, a deep inhale echoes in your mind.

“The temple is where our business will be finished.”

And just like that you’re once again left alone in the silent darkness of the room.

a/n: welp folks, here we have it. weird way to say it ig but happy star wars day! may the force be with you

(ignore that this is a day late and also absolutely not proofread, both becuz tumblr was being a bitch and I lost this fic like 6 times and I almost don't care anymore lol)

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mieldreams · 1 month ago

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Dumb-Charades

Summary: It's your last night of Navratri back home before you have to return for uni, can Anakin finally get that dance with you?

warnings: ohhh boy, y'all better buckle up cuz this one's a ride (not that kind you perverts)

word count: ~14k (I am so sorry I have no idea how this happened)

a/n: I have starved the desi girls and gays for too long so now it is time to feast.

ps: the title is clever this time. i think.

Part 1 Part 2

The four of you had finally reached the ground, and how you and Anakin had managed to not kill each other in a compact space such as the kitchen for the brief two minutes it had taken for Aamani and Krish to get there was something that they'd be discussing later.

But for now, all of you were here and this time for some reason Anakin had been sticking with the group for the most part, hardly straying or disappearing off to who knows where like he'd done the past few times.

You had taken notice of this too, and questioned Krish, "Hey, have you noticed Anakin hasn't left us to wander off and away from the crowds the whole evening... did someone say something to him?" You looked at him with a furrow in your brows.

Now Krish couldn't tell you the truth, he couldn't, or rather, didn't know how to tell you that it might have something to do with the conversation they'd had last night after Anakin had returned.

****

'Hey man, you've been out a while, you good?' Krish had questioned as soon as he saw Anakin walk in through the front door.

Anakin, who hadn't been expecting anyone to be up at that hour, got caught off guard and tripped on the shoes he'd been trying to remove in complete darkness.

"Fuckin, shi–"

Krish got up from the couch and quickly walked over to him, "Oh shit– are you okay? Sorry dude, didn't mean to scare you.." he whispered while offering a hand to help him up.

Anakin took the hand and pulled himself up, "I'm fine," he grumbled while brushing off his kurta, "but would you care to tell me why you were sitting on that chair like the freaking winter soldier with the lights off and everything?"

"Oh, the lights– right!" Krish quickly walked over to the small lamp on the table and turned it on, a warm yellow light illuminating the couch area. Krish slumped onto the big couch and gestured for Anakin to join him.

Anakin indulged him and plopped down on the other end of the three-seater, turning to Krish though Krish was looking at the ceiling with his eyes closed, "So? What are you up this late for?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

Now it was Krish's turn to look at him while Anakin turned his head to observe the fan spinning above him. He shrugged a shoulder, "Just went for a walk."

"It's almost two in the morning, Anakin."

He doesn't even have to look to know that Krish's face would hold that worried parent look, his tone indicating clear disapproval. And while Anakin might be a dick sometimes, he knew better than to inconvenience someone who was so kindly giving him a place to stay for the holidays.

"Sorry," he turned to look at Krish, "I just uh... lost track of time.. a little bit.." he scratched his head before clearing his throat.

Now he didn't usually lie to his best friend, but right now he was in no mood to get laughed at, or worse, lectured, so he conveniently left out the part where he took a wrong turn and ended up getting chased around the neighbourhood by stray dogs which led to him scaling a wall only to end up in some random old lady's backyard. She had mistaken him to be a thief he assumes, creeping into someone's yard over the wall at well past midnight, and started yelling for her husband all the while shooting her flip-flops at him. He had barely made it past the gate and out of sight before the man had come running out.

That was when he had realised that he didn't recognise the streets anymore. Every turn looked the same and there were way too many...what had you called them? Right, galis. All of those looked the same too.

So it had taken him an hour to find his way back.

But Krish didn't need to know all of that.

"Okay, that's alright, but next time, please at least call or text me if you're gonna be late."

Anakin felt bad that he might've made Krish wait and worry, though somewhat unintentionally, "I will. Sorry for worrying you, didn't mean to."

Krish shook his head, "I was worried about you yeah, but not mainly because of that..." he trails off.

Krish has known Anakin for a while now, he knows his moods and behaviour, which is exactly why he was hesitant to bring up the events of the night.

At his words, Anakin's mind immediately flashed back to your smile – your smile as you'd been talking to that AnnoyingJerk.

An annoyed tick appeared on his brow that Krish noticed immediately.

"I meant it you know. Are you okay?"

He knew Krish meant well but honestly, he was tired and the exhaustion of being out for so long, and especially that dog chase, was catching up to him. He just wanted to go to bed and forget everything.

He took a deep breath, "I'm fine."

"Are you sure—"

"Yes, Krish. I'm sure." He snaps but immediately feels bad again, after all his friend was only worried about him. He sighs, closing his eyes and leaning further back into the cushions, "Anyway, did you have fun? How was the dandiya?" He hoped he had masked the bitter emphasis on the word well enough.

Judging from Krish's reply, he assumed he did, "It went great dude! The music was great. You saw the lighting set up around the tent right? Made for really cool backdrops for photos, I'll show you tomorrow. But yeah Aamani and I had a lotta fun– Y/N too, she had A...J.." his voice faded out to a grimace when he realised the topic had reverted back to that guy.

This time, Anakin could hardly contain the biting tone, "Yeah? She have fun too?"

He expected Krish to change the topic like he almost always did when he realised Anakin wasn't too comfortable with the conversation. It was one of those things Anakin had quickly come to like about him.

But this time it seemed even Krish had a point to make as he continued, "Yes, actually."

His serious tone made Anakin turn his head and when he saw the stern expression on Krish's face he raised a brow in question, to which Krish replied,

"She did have fun Anakin. From what I could tell she really enjoyed her time with him. I heard they study the same thing and apparently have a lot in common."

"They even exchanged numbers." Krish gave Anakin a pointed look.

Damn. You exchanged numbers? As in you gave him your number willingly? Anakin knows how selective and cautious you are about sharing your number, specifically with strangers. Hell, he'd gotten your number only because you'd worked on a project together, not even your common friendship with Krish had earned him that. You'd told him you didn't have time for foolish conversations with him.

So you'd been hesitant to share your number with him but not with this AJ?

You are ready to chat up with him the first time after meeting him? Did you really like him that much?

Krish could practically hear Anakin's thoughts and knew what he was thinking but it seems Krish really had a point to make this time.

"Look Anakin," Krish sighed but waited till Anakin met his eye, continuing in a softer tone this time, "she's not going to wait forever. And you can lie to us but can you really pretend to yourself? She really did seem to enjoy herself tonight and I'm going to be honest with you, she deserves it. She danced with AJ. They talked, they laughed, they exchanged numbers and planned to hang out soon. We both know Y/N and that she wouldn't make hasty choices but we also know she's spontaneous so who knows what she'll do."

Who she'll choose.

It didn't have to be said out loud when Krish was looking at him with that almost accusing face. It would irritate Anakin if he had the energy.

"–and she already doesn't like you a whole lot Anakin."

Okay, now that did annoy Anakin.

"I know that" he grunted.

"Yeah? Good." Krish gave him a strong shoulder pat before getting up, "So you know what to do then," and with that Krish bid him goodnight and headed to his room, leaving Anakin alone in the quiet living room.

That's the thing though, Anakin didn't know what to do.

Other than follow you around like a lost puppy, not leaving to wander off in case that AverageJoker shows up. Lucky for him you seemed content sticking with Aamani and Krish so he wouldn't have to come up with an excuse to particularly be by your side. Instead, he can just say he feels like staying with the group tonight.

However, his plan is... hardly a plan. Which is why it immediately fails when about fifteen minutes after arriving, you spot AJ, or rather AJ spots you, waving his hand above his head enthusiastically and trying to get your attention from across the ground. And he does. He's standing with a few other guys and girls about your age when you notice him calling you over.

You turn to look at your group, but Krish and Aamani had already noticed him as well, including the small smile that had immediately taken over your face when you spotted him waving you over.

Anakin noticed it too. But he could only watch helplessly as Aamani told you 'It's fine, we'll meet up before the dance. Go have fun', and Krish shot him a look.

But what could Anakin do? It seemed the universe was simply not on his side, he hardly even got to talk to you alone before that guy had to call you away. The universe truly must be against him.

Or was it?

Because while Krish and Aamani also left, having been called over by some old man that the two seemed to recognise, Anakin had been a little too transfixed on watching you go so he ended up staying in the same spot.

You're only a few feet away when he notices a little kid running up to you, you don't notice her though so when she runs and hugs your legs you stumble a little and Anakin quickly starts making his way towards you. From what he can see the kid looks a little frenzied and you bend down to her height to talk to her, though he's a bit far to make out your words.

The kid says something to you and you get up to turn and look around, as if searching for someone. A lost kid?

As he nears you the kid takes notice of him and immediately grasps your hand, hiding behind your legs. You follow her gaze to Anakin who comes to stand before you. Noticing his expression you answer his unspoken question, "This is my little friend Tara," you nod your head at the little girl, encouraging her to step forward but she only shakes her head and hides further behind you, barely peeking out to look at him, "she was playing with the other kids but can't find her mother now."

You then gesture to Anakin, "This is my...friend, Anakin."

Now, were it any other time he would probably not let that 'friend' slide without some heavy teasing but the little girl was already looking at him like he was some alien so instead he bends down to her height.

"Hey Tara, it's nice to meet you," he tries to sound as normal and kid-friendly as possible but it's been a long time since he's actually talked to one so he feels a bit off. Plus the little girl only hiding further behind you doesn't really make him feel better.

You tsk at her, "c'mon Tara, don't be like that, Anakin's nice, you can greet him at least."

But she only shakes her head stubbornly, "No. Ma said don't talk to strangers."

Her puffed-up cheeks and brows furrowed in seriousness almost make you laugh, "And that's a very important thing to remember Tara, but I'm your didi right? You know me?"

She nods her head.

"And Anakin here is someone I know," you point a thumb at him, "I'm your friend and he's my friend, so you can talk to him, it'll be fine."

But she only shakes her head again.

This time Anakin is the one to speak up, "It's okay Tara, you don't have to talk to me right now," he glances at you before looking at the kid again, "How about I help you find your mom, then maybe we can be friends?"

He doesn't know what's come over him. While he wasn't cruel enough to abandon a lost kid he also usually didn't take much initiative to talk to one at all. But there's a part of him that's grateful for the interference, at least now you seem to have forgotten about what's his face.

The girl hesitantly nods her head.

Anakin gets up to start searching the grounds, asking her to tag along to help him identify her mom. He starts some small talk to keep the little girl entertained, simple questions like her age (I just had my birthday – I'm five years old, so I'm grown up now) or her favourite movie.

It was funny how she wouldn't greet him a minute ago, but when it came to talking about her favourite Barbie movie—Barbie Princess Charm School—which apparently was your favourite too, she didn't even need to pause for a breath to explain the plot when he said he hadn't seen it.

And while you would've loved to let the two continue their interesting conversation that went something like:

"How tall are you, Anarchy?"

"It's Anakin. How do you even know that word?"

"The man with the funny accent says it in the Ham musical. How tall are you??"

Ham...musical? The man with the funny accent?

"Are you talking about some cartoon musical?"

She giggles, "No silly, the hammy one – the one with the man in the funny beard and ponytail. How tall are you?"

He's going to have to ask you about the Ham musical later on, "uh.. I'm over 6 feet tall.."

"You're tall... so did you know the dinosaurs?"

What?

"What?"

"The dinos, have you ever seen them??"

Maybe he was right in staying far from kids.

"Um no...? What does my height have to do with dinosaurs?"

"All tall people are adults, adults are old," she starts gesturing with her hands animatedly, "dinosaurs are old, but every adult I ask has never seen a dinosaur." She has a disappointed pout on her face now and Anakin wants to laugh.

"Well kid, I'm not as old as dinosaurs, or as tall, but uh... do you wanna see what it's like from my height? We can get you on my shoulders?" This time he looks back at you for permission and you immediately have to erase the small smile that had taken over your face listening to their conversation as they walked a little ahead of you.

"YESSS!!!" Tara screams in joy so you have no choice but to shrug in response.

Once he sees that you aren't strictly against it he stops walking to gently pick up the five-year-old and place her on his shoulders.

He's about to start walking again, but a loud shout of "Nakshatra!!" stops him.

Both you and Anakin turn to the woman who had just yelled, speedily making her way towards you.

"Oh, that's her mom," you inform Anakin who in response goes to lift Tara to put her down again but she only wiggles on his shoulders, not wanting to get off so soon.

"Nakshatra!" the woman had reached you now and was giving a mom glare to her daughter sitting on Anakin's shoulder. "What are you doing on this poor dada's shoulders? Bandor mey kothakar! Get down immediately!"

"But Maa—" Tara starts to whine.

"No buts. I want your butt down here right now."

When she stops fussing Anakin gently puts her down on the floor, and you speak up, "It's fine aunty, she just couldn't find you so she came to me to help her look." You point to Anakin, "Anakin's my friend and we were just going to look for you."

The woman takes her daughter's hand, "Oh thank you so much, shukriya. I just left Tara alone for a minute and she ran off to play and then I couldn't find her.." she turns to Anakin, "Thank you for helping. You're Y/N's friend? She's a very sweet girl, huh? Sheta ekta khub mitha meye! Khub mitha!–" Her gaze is drawn to Anakin's forehead, then yours.

"Arey! Tumi kunku diye ni?"

You realise she's referring to the missing red kumkum dots on your foreheads. You'd been a little late to arrive, so you'd missed the puja and thus hadn't been to the little temple either.

"Ah, no, we missed the puja.." you reply.

The woman tsks, "That won't work. It's a festive day after all! Go pay a visit to the devi and come."

"Mama, can I go too?" little Tara speaks up, trying to convince her mom to let her spend a few extra minutes with you and Anakin.

"Absolutely not, little lady."

"But Anakin was just starting to become my friend!" she whines.

At this, Anakin speaks up for the first time since the lady joined, his voice taking on a faux offended tone, "What? I thought I'd be your friend if I helped you find your mom? We found her!"

Little Tara giggles again, shaking her head, "Nooo, Mama found us!" She then looks at Anakin with a mischievous smile, "Buuut we can be friends if I can go on your shoulders again." She makes grabby hands at him.

It was funny to watch someone so tiny try to make a deal with him. She almost felt like a mini version of you.

He bends down to her height, "Hmm...would the friendship be guaranteed after one round around the ground?"

She eagerly nods her head and Anakin looks up at you for help. Now you were on the receiving end of two pairs of big pleading eyes and pouting lips. Little Tara you could understand, but Anakin too? Why was he so childish and why did he have to have such perfectly pink pouty lips? Ugh, fine.

So you request her mother to allow her a few minutes with you and Anakin so she could get her ride on his shoulders. The older woman, also tired from running after her daughter, gives in, with Anakin and Tara high-fiving each other in victory. You roll your eyes but the smile on your face is hard to deny this time.

You quickly promise her mother to bring Tara back soon and meet her near the tables. And with that, Anakin lifts her up onto his shoulders once again, little squeals of laughter escaping her as he lightly tickles her legs.

You fall into step with him, though for the most part, you're there merely as the audience and occasional participant in their conversation (for which you're glad – conversations hardly ever stayed normal with Anakin.)

On the walk around the perimeter of the ground you come across the little temple where the prayer was held.

"Didi! I wanna go there again!" Tara leans to the side while pointing at the temple as Anakin sways while holding her legs to maintain balance. You and Anakin look at each other then shrug, might as well.

So you walk into the temple together, Anakin's height allowing Tara to ring the bell easily which excited her for some reason, asking to ring it three more times just for fun.

You notice the small smile that would grace Anakin's face every time Tara's childish giggles and gleeful laughter would colour their conversation, the little gleam in his eyes every time he made her laugh.

He has such a pretty smile...

Anakin turns to you with a raised brow, oh, had you missed something he'd said?

"Didi," you look down to see Tara standing on her own two feet now, you had definitely spaced out for a second, "you have to give the flowers," she points at the basket of flowers kept to the side.

"Yes, Tara, I know." You ruffle her hair before walking up to the idol of the goddess with Anakin, showing him how to give his offerings.

"No didi, you need to do the puja," she points to the puja thaali, "with dada," she then points at Anakin who's busy studying the idol and the offerings and various decorations at the altar. "Ma and Baba did it together too," she explains.

You quickly glance at Anakin before walking over to Tara and bending to her height, "yes Tara but that's because your Ma and Baba are married. Anakin and I are..." you sneak another glance at him, quickly realising he looks annoyingly good again today. It is only then that you realise he's wearing a blue kurta, the same colour as your lehenga. How did you end up matching and not realise until now? More importantly who convinced Mr. 'I-wear-clothes-the-colour-of-my-soul: black' to wear anything but that?

It really brings out his eyes though...

You clear your throat. "We're just friends." It wasn't that evil to lie to a child right? "And, it's way past the puja time. We just came here for a quick offering anyways."

Plus you're not sure how well the prayers would work—not when you'd be praying with the same person that you'd previously wished would slip on a banana peel and fall into a pool full of sand.

You get up and walk over to the altar again, dipping your finger into the little red kumkum, calling Tara over to place a small dot on her forehead, right between her eyebrows.

When you turn back, Anakin is looking at you curiously. "It's just some red powder you use for religious stuff," you explain. He glances at your red finger, nods his head then closes his eyes.

Oh. You hadn't expected him to want to put it too. Least of all from your hands.

There isn't anyone else here, you dumbass. Of course he's going to ask you – it's not that special.

You dip your finger once again, moving closer to him. When you do, your gaze slips and you realise just how pink his lips are. He must've been biting them again. He always did that when he was nervous. But why would he be nervous right now?

As if on cue he licks his lips then bites it again, and is it really your fault that your eyes are drawn to the movement when you're standing so close?

Your eyes dart to Tara who's now running in circles around you with some stray ribbon she found. Focus, Y/N. focus.

You raise your hand to quickly dot his forehead, "there."

You go to step away but Anakin had not only opened his eyes but also swiftly grabbed your wrist. "Wait," he starts, "you didn't put some. Let me."

And before you could argue about putting it on yourself he's already dipped his finger. He moves closer again, arm raising towards your forehead. But before he could place the tika, Tara trips on a folded part of the carpet and accidentally bumps into Anakin, making his arm jerk and stain your eyebrows instead.

"Oh shi—"

You quickly slap your hand over Anakin's mouth, muffling his voice.

"Didi! I'm sorry!" little Tara shrieks, nervous and panicky.

You look down to see Tara looking at you anxiously, "It's okay Tara, it's just some kumkum," you reassure her, "look I can rub it off–" but when you remove your hand over Anakin's mouth to take out a handkerchief you realise you aren't carrying one. You tsk in disappointment, but when you look up, Anakin's holding out his in front of you.

"Oh– um, thanks," when you go to take it from him though he quickly moves his hand away.

Ugh, you mentally roll your eyes, "Anakin I do not have the patience for your stupid games right now. Just give me the kerchief or—"

He raises a brow, "—or what?

You glance at Tara still looking at you with her eyes wide. Well damn, you can't say anything in front of her.

You sigh. Not bothering to answer him, you go back to wiping your eyebrow with your hand. But before you can do that Anakin's hand swats yours away.

Now he rolls his eyes, "Calm down. Let me do it– you won't be able to see it anyway."

Before giving you time to argue he is crowding your space, and you have absolutely no way to prepare yourself for the unexpected warmth of his palm on your cheek. The delicate way he cups your jaw, fingers lightly dabbing on and around your eyebrow.

Until he realises that it's getting him nowhere, so he starts to scrub a little harder and then a little more until he's practically trying to wipe your eyebrows clean off, you swear you could almost hear the squeaking sound of rubbing.

"Dude!–" You snatch the cloth from him, "what the fu—" You barely just stop yourself, "uudgesicles—" Both you and Anakin turn to see if Tara caught that but she's now too busy trying to do an imaginary waltz with her own shadow.

So you snap back at Anakin, "what the h–e–l–l? You trynna make me look like Whoopi Goldberg or something? Freaking Jared Leto in The Dallas Buyers Club? Huh??"

He rolls his eyes again. You swear with all the eye-rolling this boy did, one day he's gonna end up looking like the villain of the next Conjuring movie or whatever.

"Relax. I barely did anything. And look," he pointed at your forehead, "all the red stuff is still there and your forehead is weirdly pink now." He's got an infuriating smirk on his face.

You take a challenging step towards him, "And who's fault is that smart a-s-s?"

"—Didi," Tara's voice interrupts you, "I'm tired. Wanna go back to Ma now."

Your shoulders deflate as you sigh. You won't be able to call him your preferred choice of colourful names in Tara's presence anyway, better to just forget it.

So you walk up to Tara and she automatically raises her hands to be carried. Oh, she was a spoilt little princess. But when Anakin walks towards the two of you to exit the shrine together, Tara quickly switches teams, stretching towards him and extending her arms towards his shoulders.

Anakin is a bit surprised at that, though he wordlessly takes her from you. Holding her close to his chest as she lays her sleepy head on his shoulder. You both share a hesitant look – yours because you know Anakin isn't too big on kids so you don't know how comfortable he is with this, and him because he isn't sure what to do with this weird feeling in his chest stemming from the fact that little Tara is so readily cozying up to him, sleepy hums mumbled into his shoulder as he runs a hand up and down her back to keep her warm in the cold night.

You quietly clear your throat, "Let's go drop Tara off with her mom." Anakin nods in agreement and you both start making your way along the boundary of the ground towards the tables.

You keep glancing at Anakin every few moments until he finally speaks up, "Can you stop doing that? I'm not gonna drop her or something," he huffs.

"Jeez, well I'm sorry for worrying when you've said on multiple occasions how much you don't like kids and would rather chop your own arm off than babysit one."

An uncertain look passes over his face, "And I would. It's just– Tara is...nice."

You snort, "Nice?" A teasing smirk grows on your face, "Wait– don't tell me you're growing soft over a kid?"

You can almost feel the irritation when he snaps in a whisper, "I'm not growing soft." There's a furrow in his brows, "it's just..."

But before he can finish his sentence you hear a loud call of your name from ahead of you, and both you and Anakin quickly turn your heads to shush the person walking over.

It turns out to be your friend Pari who comes to a stop before you, whispering her apology when she notices Tara's sleeping form.

When she finally registers the scene before her– you with your smudged pink forehead, and Anakin carrying a dozing Tara, the two of you walking so close together (it was just so you could hear each other whispering of course), she can't help but raise a brow.

A small smirk takes on her face, "oho Y/N, apne dildaar ke sath mast prempoorn sair chal rahe hai lagta hai."

Your cheeks flush and you try to keep your voice low, "Koi sair-wair nahi chal rahi!"

Pari takes notice of how you don't correct her other word, and continues her teasing, "Accha, toh kya biwi-miya ka ghar ghar khel chalu hai?"

You felt your irritation grow, the heat in your face increasing as well. "Pari– seriously, not now–"

"Okay baba sorry," but the smirk on her face remained, "I'm just saying you know...~

Her expression then changes like she just remembered something, "Oh wait! You won't be here tomorrow right?"

You nod your head with a sad smile, "Yeah...we've gotta get back for uni a few days in advance..." You glance at Anakin who seems to be busy murmuring something to a now somewhat awake but still snoozy Tara as they walk a little ways off to the side.

"We've got an early afternoon flight tomorrow," you scrunch your nose, "so no...we won't be here for tomorrow's celebrations."

"Kya yaar, it's like you hardly stayed for a week" she points out.

"Two weeks, actually." You correct her, "and that too with a few days of extended leave.. so trust me, if I could I'd stay longer but... we just can't." You tell her regretfully.

She pouts in disappointment, pulling you in for a hug, "Hmm...excuses excuses" she jokes, swinging you side to side before sighing, "I'll miss you, crazy."

She pulls back from the hug but keeps her hold on your arms, "Call me, whenever you can, I want updates on your thing with Mr Pouty McGrouch over there," she smirks, tilting her head over to Anakin who was still whispering with Tara, their hushed conversation not privy to your ears.

"What? I told you–" you huff, you'd told her over a dozen times during your practice sessions because she seemed to be very adamant about there being something between you and Anakin, only fueled by Manu's own teasing remarks. "–I told you, there's nothing there. I would hardly even call us friends."

She only rolled her eyes in response, "Babe, he's looked over at you at least five times in the past two minutes like you're going to disappear or something. I feel like if I keep you any longer he might just think I'm trying to steal you," she jokes.

You have the urge to check for yourself – to turn around and look at Anakin again, but for some reason, you don't. Instead you shake your head once again, "I don't know what I can say to convince you."

"You don't have to say anything at all, babes." She laughs, "Koshish bohut ki, ki raaz-e-mohobbat bayan na ho, mumkin kaha tha ke aag lage aur dhuwa na ho?" she quotes god knows who.

"Well, aren't you in a cheesy mood?" You smile sarcastically, "Wake up babe, this isn't some Jane Austen narrative. Anakin does not like me. And we do not look cute together."

"Bet?"

"What?"

Pari calls out Anakin's name, getting his attention and he walks back over to the two of you. She hadn't talked much to the guy, just the occasional small talk when they'd cross paths whenever he was with Aamani and Krish. But from what she definitely knew– there was undoubtedly a little something between the two of you. She remembers that evening at your house a few days ago, and she definitely wasn't blind.

There's an almost nervous look on your face, why the hell were you nervous, "Um, what are you doing?"

Anakin stops right beside you, a half-asleep Tara still snuggled up to him. Though she immediately perks up at Pari's next words.

"Since it's your last night here, I think you should have a photo together." She boops Tara on the nose, who's now fully awake at the mention of clicking photos. The little diva loved the camera. Pari's already got her phone out before you can get a word in, and Tara's excitement hardly leaves room for argument.

Still, you look at Anakin with an unsure and inquisitive look as if to say 'you okay with this?'

He only shrugs in response.

So all three of you turn to face the camera, but Pari's voice chimes in, "uh Y/N, can you move a little closer to Anakin, please?"

Why do you have a feeling that if it weren't for the phone covering her face you'd see the same kind of mischievous smile on her face that you often see on Manu's? No wonder those two get along well.

You shuffle somewhat awkwardly a bit closer to Anakin's side.

"No Y/N, closer."

This time you don't move, only glaring at Pari instead. You know what she's doing, or trying to do at least.

She concedes with a small chuckle, clicking a few pics from different angles.

You, Anakin and Tara give big cheesy smiles after Pari tells you, "C'mon guys! Y'all look like those actors that pretend to be statues and stuff except one that has to like, pee really bad or something."

Tara channels her inner Beyonce to pose in different ways – from leaning back on Anakin's shoulder and dramatically fluttering her lashes at the camera to squishing her cheeks against his, her tiny pudgy hands squishing his face to get him to make duck faces with her, then leaning over to play with your hair – making two devil's horns on your head with two hair strands and giggling quietly like she was being all secretive about it, only encouraged more by Anakin. You knew of course, going along with it and pretending you didn't feel the slight tug from her small hands, then acting all surprised as you turned around and "caught" her in the act. Her giggled apologies were barely coherent through your tickle attack. She leans away from you to get away from your relentless fingers, and the three of you are so caught up in the moment that you don't notice how much closer you're now standing until you hear a series of clicks from Pari's phone, capturing your candid smiles with a soft smirk of her own, oh Manu is going to have a field day when she gets these.

For the last photo Pari moves closer and your heart almost leaps out of your chest when you feel Anakin's wide palm on your waist tugging you closer to his side so that you fit in the shot. But his arm doesn't drop even after he's pulled you closer. The persistent warmth of his fingers brushing over the bare skin peaking between your top and skirt sets loose a whole circus in your stomach, the heat spreading like a ring of fire.

The way the curve of his palm fits the curve of your waist feels too perfect, the way Anakin so naturally gets along with Tara, catering to her every whim of silly poses and ridiculous faces all the while making her laugh, the way he so unexpectedly yet perfectly fits into this part of your life that you hold very dear to your heart, and the hand still hugging your waist, that goddamn hand— between all of it, you're struggling to keep your head straight, struggling to not lean into his inviting warmth, struggling to keep that promise you'd made yourself all those months back.

In the meantime, AJ starts looking for you after you don't show up to where he'd called you. He spots Aamani and Krish and walks over to ask them if they knew where you were.

"Oh Y/N?" Aamani had just seen you walk away with Anakin and Tara, "No idea dude. Haven't seen her in a while."

Krish turns to her with a confused look, "In a while? Didn't she just walk away with Ani—"

"—Anakin yeahh, right I forgot," Aamani forces a laugh through gritted teeth, "she did walk away with Anakin, you know, her very good friend" she spoke (lied) pointedly at AJ.

"Oh, so do you know where she we—?"

"No."

"Oh– okay, uh.. well if you see her could you tell her to meet me?"

Goddamn why couldn't he just take a hint.

Manu only gives a noncommital hum. "Actually, AJ, you see it's our last garba night tonight, and Krish and I haven't really been able to get any good photos together," she turns to Krish with wide eyes, shaking her head exaggeratedly so Krish follows suit. "Would you mind clicking a few pictures of us?" she asks him in an overly sweet voice.

He hesitates, "Uh.. I was going to go find Y/N—"

"You'll find her...eventually. She'll show up in a while to meet us anyway. You can talk to her then if you want."

She quickly unlocks her phone, opens the camera and shoves it in his hands.

"Oh– um okay.."

Aamani takes all the time in the world directing Krish how she wants him in the photos – holding hands in front of the entrance with the fairy lights, under the tree with fairy lights, under the colourful dance canopy. Noticing their little photoshoot, a few kids stop to watch and Manu gets an idea.

"Hey baccha log, you guys wanna be in the pics too?"

"YEAHHH!"

And so the impromptu photoshoot continues.

After about fifteen minutes of different angles, various location changes and a whole lotta funny faces at the camera, one of Manu's mom's old friends spots her. Walking over she initiates a conversation starting with 'Are baap re! Kitni badi hogayi!' and ending with her joining the photo shoot with Krish and Aamani and getting a few pics with just Aamani.

She then spots a few of her friends walking by, and having realised how good AJ is at taking photos (much to his own displeasure), calls them over, requesting him to click a few pictures with them.

"Hope you don't mind us stealing your camera man Aamani," the woman jokes.

"Oh no, it's all good," she's trying to stop the smirk growing on her face, "I'm sure AJ is more than happy to help you ladies, right AJ?"

His eyes shift back and forth between Aamani and the group of women whispering and laughing, adjusting their skirts and flipping their hair to pose in different ways. He laughs somewhat awkwardly, "Yeah. Ha-ha, it's no problem at all." He speaks through strained laughter.

The group's chatter fades into the distance as Aamani and Krish start walking the other way. Krish studies Manu for a few seconds, "You feel bad don't you?"

Aamani sighs, "it's just– AJ isn't a bad guy... in fact, he's pretty decent." She grabs his hand to distractedly to play with his fingers, "it's just that—"

"—Y/N needs something a little more stable than a long-distance relationship specifically after what happened with that last idiot and whatever's the deal with her and Anakin has been going on for too long and they deserve closure before anything else, and honestly I'm getting sick and tired of their constant 'pull their hair to show them you like them' tactics like some sort of kindergarten kids?"

"Um yeah, exactly—"

"—Or the fact that I still don't understand why they can't just talk to each other and why they instead play this weird game of hide and seek with their own feelings, always running away from each other and hiding behind childish arguments and fake dislike. Or the fact that they don't hate each other at all which makes it harder for them to pretend and so they always start stupid fights which they drag us into and we always have to be the ones to do damage control like some sort of tired parents trying to get their kids to get along for just ONE. GODDAMN. MINUTE!"

The group of ladies all stop their conversation to stare at him. AJ turns around with his hand still hovering over the camera button, blinking at the two. The kids are gawking. A cow moos in the distance.

"This is...awkward," one of the kids whispers, and with that single cue, the kids begin slowly inching away before breaking into a run when they're far enough.

Manu gives a nervous sort of laugh at the group before quickly grabbing her boyfriend by his kurta and dragging him out the gate.

You finally drop Tara off with her mother and you're about to make a call to Manu to ask her where her and Krish are, not seeing them anywhere on the huge ground. But the shrill noise of a mic being turned on interrupts your movements, the voice of a man you cannot see echoing the announcement of the beginning of the garba in a few moments, requesting all the people to gather under the vast canopy.

Right after his announcement you hear a voice call out your name, turning around and spotting AJ walking towards you. You hear a huff behind you but you can hardly pay attention as AJ reaches you and immediately starts going off about how he'd been looking for you but couldn't find you and Krish and Aamani didn't know where you were either and how he then got pulled into this impromptu Vogue Aunties photoshoot.

Only at the end of his rant does he notice Anakin's tall figure behind you, gasping and shoving you aside to immediately take Anakin's hand and start shaking it enthusiastically.

"Oh my gosh! You must be Anakin!" he's still shaking Anakin's hand.

Anakin's trying not to wince at the force of the shake, speaking through a grimaced smile, "Yeah...I am."

"Y/N's told me so much about you! You're in engineering right? Must be cool. My parents wanted me to study that, engineer son and all that" he rolls his eyes, "but that never happened. So now I'm disappointment son. Like geez mom, Cardi B started out as a stripper too."

Anakin's eyes widen, "You're a stripper?"

AJ laughs, finally dropping Anakin's hand, "Oh no no no, I have the balance of a gorilla on stilts having a seizure, I could never survive those 6-inch heels haha."

"...right."

You walk forward to stand beside AJ, gesturing with your hands, "Anakin, this is AJ. He goes to college in another town but he's staying with his parents for the break. We just met last night during garba."

"Yup. Your friend here is a real good dancer you know?" AJ smiles at you and you return it with...is that a blush on your face?

"Oh really? I wouldn't know." His tone had a certain bite to it that made you frown at him.

"Oh ma god, totally. Made me feel like Jack Sparrow next to Beyoncé"

You roll your eyes, still smiling, "He's exaggerating."

"Wait that reminds me! The dance is literally just about to start! C'mon or we won't be able to join without it being awkward, and you know I got social anxiety!" AJ quickly takes your hand, already dragging you away but pausing to look at Anakin who was still rooted to his spot, "You're not coming?"

"Oh no, Anakin is practically allergic to all things fun," you joke.

AJ only shrugs in response, breaking into a half-run half-jog to drag you to the dance circle before the music started.

A whole half an hour passes in the wink of an eye, the loudspeakers endlessly playing song after song as if challenging the crowd to see who lasts the longest on the floor. Manu and Krish join you halfway through, taking their place right next to you in the circle. As you danced to the last song before the break for tonight's special event – the game night, you realised you were already thoroughly exhausted. There's sweat dripping down the side of your forehead and a slight ache in your feet, but as you look at all the people around you with their most colourful clothes and brightest grins – the old ladies gossiping in the seating area, little Tara standing across from you, practically running instead of dancing, determined to keep up with the pace of the adults though eventually her dad picks her up and places her on his shoulders. You can almost hear her little giggles as he bounces her to the beat of the music. Then there's Manu and Krish, right beside you, dopey smiles on their faces that grow every time their hands clap together. You were sure they could hardly see anything but the other person. Taking it all in, you realise you're going to miss this. You're going to miss this so much. The colours, the music, the sweets, the songs, the pretty ghagras and just...everything. It almost pained you to think about your flight back tomorrow.

You're snapped out of your thoughts when AJ calls out your name, "Earth to YN? Where'd you get lost?"

You look at AJ dancing opposite you before your gaze shifts and lands on another figure standing at the edge of the opposite side of the canopy. He turns, just as AJ circles back towards you.

Your hands clap against AJ's, and across the circle, your eyes meet Anakin's.

You immediately feel goosebumps rising on your arms. For a moment all you can do is look at him. And all he does is look at you. His face is blank but there's a slight crease between his eyebrows that almost makes him look mad. But you know that it's just his resting bitch face.

"Y/N?" AJ's voice breaks your trance, "Why do you keep spacing out? Someone's gonna stomp on your feet if you don't pay attention."

"Uh, right... sorry." You focus back on the dance.

The song soon gets over and everybody moves to the seating area to settle in for a night of charades.

The first few rounds are tame, the audience is split into two teams divided by the aisle running between the chairs. The movies are fairly easy to guess, though some oldies cause a few kids to boo, the adults teasing them that one day they'll be old too. The shocker comes when the host pulls out another chit to pick the next person acting from your team.

"And the next person isss..." the man squints at the chit, "Anakin!"

The vada from your pav falls splat onto the plate. Your hand hovers right before your mouth that's hanging open, now holding a vada-less pav.

You're seated at the very back so you quickly straighten up to look around for him. You spot Krish and Anakin right at the edge of the focus light, Krish pushing a stiff-as-a-broad Anakin towards the centre of the spotlight. Manu's with them too – wait was this their doing? Just what were they planning now?

Anakin's shaking his head vehemently, digging his heels into the ground but Krish somehow manages to keep pushing him forward. The two of them manage to get Anakin under the spotlight and leave him there as they quickly walk away with a shoulder pat from Krish and a 'you got this' from Manu.

Except he doesn't. As soon as he picks a chit from another bowl to pick the movie, he's immediately lost. He stares at the chit, he has no idea what this movie is. Hell, he's not sure if he can even read the name! Out of the corner of his eye he sees Aamani walking towards him and he sighs internally.

Manu asks to see the movie and from the look on her face Anakin guesses she recognises it. She quickly leans up to whisper the english translation of the title in Anakin's ear, giving him hints on how to act it out. She leaves him once again with a whispered, "Don't worry, I'm sure someone will get it. Good luck."

So now he's alone under the bright spotlights again, as well as the attention of the whole audience. He's not sure which of those is the reason for the sweat at the back of his neck.

The title of the movie is easy enough. Though even with his lack of familiarity with indian movies he's sure there's got to be other movies with the same title. He still hopes someone guesses it correctly.

They don't. A whole five minutes later, nobody's been able to guess the movie he's trying to act out. It's starting to frustrate him because it's such an easy title. Did he get some obscure movie literally no one had ever seen? With his luck, it could be. Not like he could tell if this movie was famous or not. He had already given them the hint of its language.

Another minute of exaggerated actions and frustration later Manu comes to his aid once again, turning to the audience from her seat in the first row, she tells them it's a 2000s movie. Giving you a pointed look which you miss because you're only looking at Anakin.

You could see he was sweating a lot, fiddling with his kurta in an agitated manner and though you didn't get along too well with him, you didn't exactly want him to actually be uncomfortab— wait did she say 2000s? Ohmygosh you knew this movie!—

"Nuvvu Nakku Nacchav!" You jumped from your seat in excitement, pointing at Anakin with your eyebrows raised, "It's Nuvvu Nakku Nacchav! 'I like you'!" but as soon as the words leave your mouth you realise what you just yelled out and immediately slap a palm over your mouth.

The whole audience is now turned to look at you, more than two dozen eyes staring at your standing figure, Anakin too but he's sighing in relief, fucking finally someone got it.

You feel flustered under all their stares and some annoying person decided it would be a good idea to put a spotlight on you as well and now all you want is for the earth to swallow you whole.

So as soon as the audience faces ahead again, now looking at the emcee as he picks another chit to call out the next person's name you slink away from the game. You quickly walk away to a slightly secluded area of the ground. Pretty much everybody is gathered for the game so most of the ground is empty, but still you make sure to put as much distance as you can between you and Anakin– wait, Anakin? This isn't about Anakin. The whole game thing, that's what you meant.

When you slow down you realise you're standing right before the gate to the ground, that's when you hear a shout of your name.

Ugh, why does he always find you at the worst possible moments?

You take a deep breath, turning around to face Anakin who's jogging towards you, "what, Anakin?"

He finally comes to a stop right before you, lightly panting from trying to catch up, "I uh... I wanted to give you something– I mean, give you back something."

He puts his hand in his pocket to remove something that softly jingles in his palm, silver metal reflecting in the fairy lights.

"—My jhumka! Where'd you find it?"

"It was under the coffee table at Manu's house, found it when I came over in the evening."

You raised a brow at that, "and you didn't give it to me then because...?"

"I didn't...get the chance?"

Both of your minds immediately flashback to the happenings of the evening at Manu's house, a certain heat warming up both of your cheeks.

"Uhm, right... anyways, thanks." You go to take the earring from his hand but he immediately pulls it back away from you.

"What the hell?" You make another attempt to take it back from him only for him to lift his arm and hold it above his head, another palm on your face holding you back as you try to move closer to snatch the earring though really it was as if you were just cartoonishly running on the same spot.

"Wait!—" he shouts before dropping his arm as you finally take a step back with an annoyed face, ready to ask him what's his issue.

"Wait. I want something in return."

"For what?"

"For finding your earring of course."

"You just found the earring, it's not that big of a deal." You roll your eyes, "If you hadn't found it, eventually Manu would have found it."

"That... doesn't matter. I found it first and I have it now. Do you want it back or not?"

"Seriously Anakin, what are you—ten?"

He suddenly leans his face very close to yours, looking right into your eyes as he tilts his head, "In bed yes." He winks and you shove him off, a laugh bubbling out of his chest as you try to take advantage of his distracted state but still fail to snatch the earring from his hand.

"Anakin, I swear—"

"Okay, okay. You can have the earring. But like I said I have a request."

"Holding my possessions hostage and demanding something in return isn't called a request, Anakin."

He merely shrugs, "Dance with me."

"What?"

"Dance - with - me." He enunciates each word carefully like you were hard of hearing.

You smack his arm in return, a small 'ow' escaping his lips, "I heard what you said. I meant– you want to dance? With me? Like right now...?"

He rolls his eyes, "No, not right now. For the last dance after the games."

A look of pure disbelief reflects on your face, "You want to...dance? The garba you mean??"

In all of the past five days not once had Anakin shown any interest in dancing, always opting to sulk in some corner instead like some lone dracula. To say you weren't sure if he was just pulling your leg or not would be an understatement, and so you turned your head left then right to look around you, "Be honest – is there some prank show camera recording us right now? Have they revived MTV Bakra or something? and I'm the bakra they're recording?" you continued to look around you, rocking on your feet to see past Anakin at the bushes behind.

"I have no idea what you're talking about. But no, I am not joking."

"Oh...okay."

"Okay?"

"Look I'm not some Liquid August or whatever his name was, I'm not saying it again. I already said yes."

"Do not insult my man Augustus Waters like that."

You did not think Anakin had the ability to surprise you so many times in one night, nor did you think your mouth could drop open any further, "You read Fault in our Stars?"

"I'm not uncultured."

"But why?"

His head tilts in confusion as he turns to look at the stars like they would have the answer, "Why am I not uncultured? I mean—"

"No. Why..." but then you think it would sound rude to ask him why he wanted to dance now, why today was different from all the other days. Maybe it was because today was the last day you'd be here before you all had to go back. Either way, he'd finally shown the initiative to take part in something and you didn't want to discourage him (only cause he's Krish's best friend of course).

So instead of asking, you tell him something, "...I would've said yes even if you hadn't found my earring, you know."

His head immediately snaps down to look at you and he's silent for a while, the gentle hum of cicadas the only sound surrounding you, other than the laughter and cheering of the game but you could pretend it was a quiet night with Anakin.

Wait what?

"What?" his voice seemed hushed now.

This time, you were the one who couldn't meet his eye. Immediately shifting your gaze as he continued to stare at you while you awkwardly scratched the back of your neck, "I mean... I don't want— I don't think—" you shifted your weight from one foot to another, taking a deep breath, "We don't really get to come back here a lot and I didn't realise until now how much I missed all of this, how much I missed everyone, and how lucky I am to have all of this. Don't get me wrong I love it at college but coming here during this festive season and seeing everybody so dressed up all colourful and everybody together and happy, it just...made me so glad that I have this." You speak carefully, you don't want to overstep his boundaries with a reminder of bad relationships or rub it in his face. You shake your head with an awkward sorts of laugh, "sorry I digress."

It gets silent for a few seconds but you still refuse to meet his eyes and unbeknownst to you he can't take his off of you.

"I like dancing..." you start again, not sure where you're going with this yourself.

"Y-yes— I know." He says breathily.

You dare to meet his eyes for a few seconds. You open your mouth but the words won't come out. Your gazes are locked together and it feels like every other sound is muted as all you can hear is your own heartbeat. Neither of you realise but you've ended up standing much closer together than when he'd first stopped you.

He can't stop thinking how pretty you look right now. Your shiny eyes lined with kajal blinking up at him so sweetly, your palms gripping your skirt out of nervousness. Why were you nervous? Because of him? He wanted to frown at that thought.

The sound of children laughing as they run past breaks the two of you out of your daze and you quickly take two steps back. Shaking your head to get your thoughts together while he quietly clears his throat.

You lift your head to look at him one last time, giving him a clumsy but genuine smile, "Happy Navratri, Anakin."

But before he can respond you've already turned around to walk back towards the seating area.

It's finally time for the dance and you and Anakin face each other as all the other pairs take their place around you. Anakin looks around at how the rest of them are standing then looks at the distance between the two of you, moving a few inches here and there trying to stand just right.

You notice his fidgetiness and try to draw his attention back to you, "So, does Mr Broody 'I don't dance' know the steps?"

"I'm not broody, and yeah...I got it. I think." he mumbles the last part under his breath but quickly puts on a confident smirk as he meets your eyes, "Bet I'm a natural. Just make sure you can keep up, and try not to trip and fall...for me." he winks.

You roll your eyes as the music finally fades in from the loudspeakers.

Ten minutes into dancing with Anakin you realise he's right and you're annoyed to admit (to yourself) – the guy really is a natural. He didn't dance a single night, neither the garba nor the dandiya, but here he is, flawlessly executing the footwork and expertly turning around you, twisting to switch sides then turning back to face you again.

Your hands perfectly clap against his and you find yourself thinking about how annoying it is that he's just intrinsically good, then you remember how you'd been wanting him to enjoy the festival and the dance and how you're here now, annoyed that he's almost out staging you with his quick little improvs – like taking advantage of your hand in his and unexpectedly twirling you away from him.

You laugh as you spin, throwing your hands in the air to the beat of the music before turning towards him again, your hands clapping at every other beat while you switch sides. There's a small smile on his face and a twinkle in his eyes and his heart is beating really fast, but he's sure it's just because of the dancing and not the pretty sound of your laughter and the sight of your flushed face and eyes crinkled in delight.

The rest of the dance passes in a blur. You can't take your eyes off of Anakin and that smug little smirk on his face every time he nails the footwork or the genuine smile on his face every time your hands touch or the way he so unexpectedly yet perfectly fits into a part of your life you had hardly shared with anyone other Krish and Manu but they were your childhood friends, so it was different.

And a part of you isn't sure if this is a dream – being here with Anakin, dancing with Anakin. The little sparks that you swore were real every time your hands grazed and the gleam in the eyes that won't stray from yours and the earthy smell of pine whenever you got close to him and then...

And then it was all over. Then it was the closing tune of the last song for the night, then it was being whisked away by some of your hometown friends and relatives for the last round of photos and bittersweet goodbyes.

They drag Anakin along as well, though he's subjected to the 'this better not be the last time we see you, Gora Gabbar' talk (a nickname your friends came up with after meeting his angsty ass) along with some strong pats on the back from the uncles and crushing hugs from the aunties.

Manu and Krish had disappeared for the latter part of the evening but you spot them while being dragged away for the photos. So you call them over and they too get pulled into the rush of the precious final moments together and even more precious goodbyes.

A few more bone-crushing hugs and tearful goodbyes later it's finally time for you to leave but as you're waiting by the gate for the other three to go home together, only Anakin shows up.

"Where's Krish and Manu?"

"They said they were going to drop off Krish's grandma and then get some takeout on the way back so they'll be a little late. They said we can walk back without them."

You open your mouth to ask about Manu but Anakin beats you to it, "Don't worry– I've already told Manu to text you when she gets back. And Krish too."

"Oh..well... thanks."

He nods. Then you nod, tilting your head towards the exit, "Shall we?"

The two of you start walking side by side in silence, the music of the nocturnal creatures the only sound you hear.

You lightly lift your skirt to see where you're walking, kicking a satisfying-looking stone for a few paces until Anakin breaks your concentration.

"So...what's the Ham musical?"

"Oh my god—" you snort, "it's just the Hamilton musical. I showed it to Tara when she was a baby and she got obsessed with it but she couldn't pronounce his name right so we just called him the Ham man, or you know – the Ham musical," you shake your head in laughter, "and now it's just stuck."

Anakin takes note of your glossy-eyed smile at the ground as you speak of the little girl. He realises that you were really feeling the weight of your departure tomorrow and the sadness of saying goodbye to everyone.

"What does it mean?"

His question makes you look back up at him. "Tara— her name, what does it mean? Her mother called her something different, Nak.." he tries but his voice fades out at the end, a little embarrassed at his pronunciation.

"Nakshatra. Her name's Nakshatra, but I call her Tara." You stare up into the sky as you speak. You look back down to give him a soft smile, one he isn't often privileged to receive, "It means constellation. You see our families are close, and when her mom was pregnant I was a weird teenager with an obsession for space. When her mom jokingly asked me for suggestions for the baby's name I said Nakshatra. It sounded like a warrior name almost, you know? Had solid weight to it, and it meant constellations. It felt perfect. I guess her mom thought so too considering she stuck with it. But it only felt perfect until I saw baby Nakshatra for the first time."

You're so lost in your recollection of the first time you visited baby Tara that you don't notice Anakin's transfixed gaze on you. So rarely does he get to be so close to you without the usual arguments and bickering, he thinks he could stare at you forever, with that shy smile on your face and that gleam in your eyes.

"I saw the little baby bundled up in her mother's arms and I was like damn I was so wrong."

Anakin raises an inquisitive brow at that. You glance at his face and explain, "Nakshatra felt like...such a heavy name. A constellation yes, but she was— she was just so tiny. So I decided that it just won't work. I called her Tara. A star. Still a part of the constellation, but something more suited to her size." You shrug casually, "plus it's quicker and easier to say."

"Nakshatra" Anakin carefully pronounces her name again, "constellation, huh. I like it."

You turn to him and he's looking at you with a certain look in his eyes that you can't decipher. It's silent for a few beats.

"Y/N, I—"

"Anakin, look! Ice cream! Wanna get some?" You're excitedly pointing at a shop behind him and before he can say anything you're already getting off the sidewalk to cross the road.

Having no choice but to follow he quickly crosses the road after you, walking into the ice cream parlour. When he walks in he notices you've somehow already got your favourite scoop in a waffle cone, happily licking at it like a baby kitten. He walks up to the counter, looking at the colourful display of the various flavours. His eyes rove over the rainbowed sections in contemplation, though in his mind he knows he'll just end up getting his usual. He glances at you for a second, leaning against one of the tables, your head tilting to catch a drop of melting ice cream off the side of your cone, tongue peaking out to slowly drag along the length of the cone.

He quickly averts his gaze and clears his throat, turning to the man behind the counter while pulling out his wallet, "Dark chocolate please—in a cone, thanks."

You notice him pulling out some cash and speak up, "Oh that's alright, I've already paid," you dismiss with a flick of your hand, pausing on your ice cream to speak to him.

"How'd you know what I'd get?" How could you have paid when the prices for different flavours were different?

You simply shrug in response, instead choosing to point at the other display case with the various toppings, "You can get the almond shavings too, you know...since I already paid.." You crinkle your nose in uncertainty, "though you don't have to. It's what you usually get but...if you don't feel like it— totally skip it, no pressure."

You go back to devouring your ice cream while he stares at you for a few more seconds but the man holding out his ice cream breaks his attention and now he's too distracted to ask for any toppings so he simply takes the cone along with extra tissue paper–he knew how messy you could get sometimes.

Once he's got his ice cream you push off the table and walk out of the shop together, starting your way back home. The walk is much quieter now, hardly any conversation as you enjoy your ice cream and the gentle night breeze. He's only halfway through his when you've already finished yours and by the time he finishes his, you're only a few houses away from yours.

As the two of you reach the gate of your house you turn to look at him, wanting to bid him goodbye quickly because the chill from the ice cream and cold night air was starting to settle in your bones.

As you turn to look at him he's already looking at you with that familiar Anakin-special intensity.

"Thanks for inviting—"

"Thanks for coming—"

You both pause.

"You go—"

"You first—"

You shake your head, choosing to just speak up first, "Thanks for coming all the way here...specifically when you could've spent the holidays with your family. I know Krish won't hesitate to thank you but I wanted to thank you as well. Usually it's not easy for Krish to come back here and stay with his parents, there's a lot they don't approve of," like his relationship with your best friend, it didn't need to be said out loud for Anakin to understand and so you continue, "and it's difficult for him to stay with them when he's back here but this time," you look back into his eyes, "because of you his parents have been a little less insufferable. And Krish's much happier having you here, so for that...thank you."

Anakin takes a deep inhale as you finish talking, not quite knowing how to receive your gratitude. Krish was his best friend after all, and this was nothing to be thanked for. Though he wasn't exactly against hearing your soft voice gently hum those sweet words to him. As he takes a step closer, there's a battle in his mind.

Why did you have to be so nice and yet go against him every time? Why did you have to have such a soft heart that immediately put up its fortifications when it came to him? You thanked him for coming here for Krish. But did you know how much he would gloat if you two sorted it out, how happy that would make him? Krish's words from the night before ring in his head, as well as the dozen other times he had been on Anakin's ass about you.

Anakin had always dismissed all of Krish's words with the excuse that whatever the two of you had, was just a you thing – the bickering, the teasing, the pranks. It just was you. But the past few days...now that he's seen a side of you that he'd never seen to this extent, the way you blossomed like the prettiest flower – so excitable, so soft. Something in him shifted. Seeing the way you were with little Tara, the way you danced and ate and laughed. There was a new sort of carefreeness in you. And it had made him start wondering...what if he wanted more than the bickering? What if instead of just teasing you and paybacks for your silly pranks, what if he could have something more? What if he stopped hesitating and what if you stopped pretending and running away?

"There's some ice cream on your cheek," your voice breaks him out of his thoughts and he sees you pointing at your own cheek to show him the spot.

He lifts his hand to rub around the place you pointed out but you shake your head telling him he missed it.

This time you take a step forward and his breath hitches in his throat when he realises the little distance between the two of you. And he's sure he stops breathing when you lift your palm, soft fingers touching his cheek so delicately he would barely feel it if he wasn't so hyper-focused on your touch.

Your thumb runs over the curve of his cheek, picking up whatever bit of ice cream he'd smudged before bringing it back to your mouth to suck at it, tongue peeking out to lick the tip. You do it so innocently – like you have no idea how fast it sends his blood rushing down south.

"Why do you hate me?"

You jerk back at his unexpected question, dropping your hand back to your side, "I don't hate you."

"Maybe. But you don't like me either."

"That's not true, I—" you do like him. That's the problem.

"Then why do you always pretend?"

"What?"

"Why do you always pretend? Why do you pretend like you don't feel it? Like there's nothing here. Why are we always stuck in this limbo?"

You roll your eyes, "Isn't that all it is to you anyway?"

"What?"

You take a sharp breath as soon as the words escape you. Goddamn, you were not expecting the night to take this turn, you did not want to confront him about this right now. All you wanted was to go home and change, maybe cry a little about leaving tomorrow and then sleep so you didn't wake up feeling like someone had hit you three times over on your head.

But now, this–

"Forget it, it doesn't matter."

There's a prominent furrow in his brow, "No— see— that. Exactly that. Stop doing that and just tell me. What do you mean?"

You're getting frustrated by his tense tone and suddenly the cold air that felt comforting after a night of dancing felt like it was suffocating you, freezing you inside out as you wonder if you really wanted to have this conversation right now.

"Anakin, can we just talk about it later—"

"No. No, because this is what you always do. You keep running away. You keep avoiding and pretending like it's going to change things. Like it's going to help us. I want to know – why do you always avoid this?"

"Because you don't mean any of it!" Your voice comes out much louder in the hollow of the late night.

"What?"

"You don't mean any of it! It's all just a game to you. I'm just a game to you." Now that you've started it seems you can't stop, "You ask me what I'm doing to you when really it's you who does everything. I don't hate you Anakin and I think that's the worst part– I can never get myself to hate you."

"You're not a game to me. Why would you ever think that?"

"I don't know, does last year's New Year's party ring a bell? What you said to Cad from Calc?"

His eyes are flickering back and forth over your face, trying to remember this Cad. He didn't usually bother remembering people who weren't significant to him, so if he doesn't remember this guy then he was probably unimportant. But then why did you remember him so specifically?

He wracks his brain, trying to remember what he could have possibly said to this guy that would change things. He knew he would remember if it was something that bothered you, so why couldn't he recall or even guess what you were referring to at all? The truth is, he remembers that night very clearly – more than he'd like. He remembers because that party had been so boring and plastic that he'd spent more than half the time trying to think of the latest way he could bother you and get you to give him that pretty smile you always tried to hide behind annoyance. But he always caught the way your lips tilted up in amusement at his latest shenanigans before you forced it into a frown. He caught the way your eyes twinkled every time he teased you, knowing that you'll always have a solid comeback to put him in his place.

He was being honest in what he told Krish – it really was just a you thing.

But now you had brought it up and he could remember everything from the party – the cheap liquor and the thumping music, his pesky friends who just wouldn't leave him alone about something, the smell of sweat and too-strong deodorant and then, the glitter on your face and the rouge on your lips, the smirk that pulled as you spotted him, the confidence in your steps as you walked to him, no doubt to tease about how lame he was being, standing in a corner when there's a party going. If only he had gotten to actually hear what you had to say, instead he had been pulled away by some random girl he vaguely remembered, a friend of a friend or something. But at least he'd gotten to make you a drink later on. Then you had been pulled away by Aamani to the dance floor. That was the last he saw you that evening. So he truly has no idea what you're referring to.

He searches his brain for some memory of that night, Cad–New Year's party, Cad–New Year's party, Cad–New Year's par–

"Oh for fuck's sake, Anakin– the bet!"

His confused face only pisses you off further.

"You were talking with your friends in the kitchen and you bet with him that you could get with me and when he said you couldn't get a single kiss out of me even if you tried you said 'I can and I will–it's only a matter of time'."

His face falls the minute he remembers, and you know he's figured it out.

But then he's fervently shaking his head, taking your hands in his, "I was just trying to be positive—"

"Positive about what? About treating me like a thing to be won? Another one of your little projects to conquer?—"

"What? No—"

"Yes, Anakin. 'Cause that's all the value you give me—"

"No, I wanted you for months before that— you know that—"

"Yeah and then I realised it was all just a joke. This cat and mouse chase— that's all it was. Just a game."

He goes to interrupt you again but you don't let him, "Look Anakin, if that's all any of it is to you, I have no problem. We can pretend that you never said anything for the sake of Krish and Manu and just go back to our usual. But you get to don't come here and lie to my face that it means something to you—"

"I'm not lying. I swear I forgot about that bet two minutes later. Even if you had kissed me that very night I wouldn't have gone back to collect on it— I don't give two shits about that guy or that bet—"

"You can't say you were— are serious about this—"

"I am! I told you!"

"—when you've never even asked me out—"

"I thought we were taking things at our pace, doing things our way, I thought that's what you wanted—"

"I wanted you to not treat me like a joke—"

"Is that why everything changed after that night?"

You scoff, was he serious right now? "No, Anakin. You treating me like I'm some cheap thing to waste your time on definitely has no significance to our re— to whatever this is— was."

The sound of the front door of your house unlocking, the latches clicking backwards in their mechanism halts your heated argument and draws your attention to the porch where the lights are now turned on, but Anakin's gaze doesn't waver from your face for even a second.

You suddenly realise that you'd been having this argument, one that you'd been trying to avoid for so long, out in the open for any passerby to hear though there weren't any other than the stray cat and a random owl hooting in the distance. The realisation flushes your face in embarrassment, you didn't want to have this conversation here, now – you didn't want to have this conversation ever. It would have been much better to just avoid it and pretend that his words hadn't buried deep in your chest that night, planting a poison thorn in your relationship and your feelings towards him. How could he pretend that any of this was serious when he went around acting like it was only worth- what? You don't even know what he had bet, not having bothered to stick around to hear that part.

Before he can say anything else you cut him off, taking a step back towards the door, giving him one last glance, "Goodnight, Anakin." And then you're gone.

Then the quiet of the night becomes a taunting silence, the cool air now bites at his skin, his brain feels like it's being blended on the highest power with all his thoughts swirling around like a tornado.

The 10-minute walk back to Krish's place feels that much longer without you and he can't stop thinking.

You thought this was a joke to him?

dividers by @saradika-graphics

A/N: life being a pain in the ass, mental health being a pain and my own unrealistic expectations turning into insecurities (and being a pain) made this much more late that it should've been. thank you for all the love you've given this series, it is unbelievable and means the world.

on another note, come scream with me at that ending

#was supposed to reblog this so long back lmao #reblog

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