mikaelsonstanaccount

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

Oh ok so it turns out ive been borrowing grief from the future ! it turns out ive been preparing to lose the things i love rather than basking in the light of them while they last. Maybe i should nt do that

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

I LOVE SODIUM!!

I LOVE CALORIES!!!!

I LOVE FATS AND CARBOHYDRATES!!!!!!

they're some of my favorite things in the whole world even!!

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

"empowering women by sending katy perry to space for 2 minutes" shut the fuck up. samantha cristoforetti was the first female commander of the international space station and she became an astronaut because of star trek. and there is a real chance she is a kirk/spock shipper

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

Klonnie Weekend 2025 Day 2: Fake Dating

I do apologize this is not fully finished but it's done enough (edit: forgot to post the damn story)

Klaus was truly shocked when he saw a letter sitting in the center of his couch. He was even more shocked when he read the handwritten invitation to some formal event for her sorority. “AKAs at Bennett College for Women…I didn’t know she was an AKA,” He mumbled to himself as he read over everything. The chapter at her university was hosting a gala to collect funding for the school as well as for the local chapter in her sorority. He saw her number written at the bottom, and he smirked. “Maybe I will call,” He hummed before dialing her number.

Bonnie saw a number flash across her screen. At first, she didn’t want to answer, but then she realized it may be one of her sorors or maybe even the event coordinator. She apprehensively answered the phone before hearing the familiar British accent over the phone. “Wow, an AKA love? Didn’t see you as a sorority type of woman. Let alone at a sorority so far from home. North Carolina? Awfully far from home.” He said as Bonnie could practically hear the smirk. “Listen, Klaus, are you going to agree to coming with me, or did you call to make fun of me?” Bonnie sighed as she crossed her arms. Klaus chuckled before letting out a small sigh. “When and where do you need me? Also, what is the dress code, beloved? I’ll make sure to look my best.” He hummed as Bonnie’s heart raced. “There’s actually one more thing…I need you for the whole weekend.” She started as she tried to think of a way to ask. “I uhm…I uh…fuck it I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend.” She said quickly before hearing Klaus chuckle over the phone.

“I’m serious Klaus!”  Bonnie whined before throwing herself down on her bed. “Look okay so one of my sisters saw that stupid photo you snuck in my grimoire, which, thanks for warning me by the way that you slipped a nude polariod of you in my spell book. Anyways, she saw it and asked who it was, and I said no one special-” She started before Klaus cut her off. “No one special? Well, I beg to differ, love. I am very special.” Klaus said as Bonnie rolled her eyes again. “Shut up and listen. Anyway, she asked if you would be my date for this weekend's events, and at first I said no, but then this jackass from another school volunteered himself to be my date. I panicked and said my boyfriend would rip your hands off. So now everyone is expecting to see my boyfriend this weekend,” She sighed before hearing Klaus struggling to hold in his laughter. 

“If you are going to laugh, I will hang up and say you broke up with me. Then you’ll have a bunch of women who hate you.” She added before he calmed down. “So what’s our story? Also, is there any sort of lifestyle I should adopt?” He asked as Bonnie sat up excitedly. “I told them you ran a historical art curation company as well as painted on the side. You are 25, and we met at one of your art shows.” She smiled as she looked through her phone. “Okay, the first event is a block party that Friday evening. Saturday is a brunch and then the gala that evening. Sunday is family game day as well as a cookout.” She said, laying everything out for him. “My dress is pink, by the way, it would be really cute if you wore a green tie.” Bonnie smiled as Klaus let out a playful sigh. 

“This is a lot of requirements, I hope I am getting adequate pay for this.” Klaus said as Bonnie rolled her eyes. “You get to sleep in my condo for the weekend, that is payment enough.” Bonnie said as Klaus smiled. “Perfect. I will be at your place at noon on Friday.” He said before hanging up. Bonnie was worried about him being there at noon. Since the block party was at 4, more than likely, she and her sisters would be getting ready together.

Just as Klaus promised, he showed up at her door promptly at 12. Bonnie took a breath before getting ready to put on the act for them. Bonnie excitedly opened the door before practically jumping into Klaus' arms. He dropped everything he was holding to wrap his arms around her hips. He, of course, didn’t miss the opportunity to lay his hands on her ass. She pecked his lips before he set her down. “I brought you a gift, mon cherie.” Klaus smiled as he held up a huge square. Bonnie unwrapped it, confused, before looking at it. It was a painting of her surrounded by sunflowers. She blushed hard, shocked that he painted her. “Thank you, baby. This is beautiful.” She smiled before sitting it in front of her mantle. 

Klaus walked inside and introduced himself to everyone while holding his bags. He walked off to Bonnie’s bedroom to place his suit in her closet. He walked back out and sat with Bonnie, fawning over her. He planned to play the part of smitten boyfriend perfectly just for her. To him, it was the least she deserved. To him he wished it were real. Bonnie deserved the best of the best in the world. A man who was obsessed with her, someone who would set the world on fire to warm her in the winter. He would lie at her feet just for a chance to worship her. He was lost in his thoughts as he watched Bonnie do her makeup in the mirror. 

At the block party, Klaus watched as she ran around with her sisters,  squirting water guns at each other. He smiled, enjoying how happy she was. He remembered the first time they met. He remembered how exhausted she looked after performing just one spell. It was then that he realized just how often Bonnie was using her magic. While hiding out in the old Bennett house, he remembered hearing whispers anytime she used her magic. He couldn’t tell what everyone was saying, but he could hear phrases of concern. “She’s overexerting herself.” “She’s too stressed.” “She needs our help,” were phrases he could make out multiple times. They were practically calling out for her to relax while her friends used her constantly. 

He knew in his heart that her ancestors were probably elated when she moved out of Mystic Falls. She could finally relax and give herself time to heal herself and her magic. Klaus saw Bonnie sneakily approaching before he quickly stood up and ran off. He let out a laugh as Bonnie chased him, spraying him with water. He grabbed his water gun and began to chase her, spraying her back. 

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

Klonnie Weekend 2025 Day 1: Forced Proximity

Klaus frowned as Bonnie drove into a dodgy motel in the middle of nowhere. “What is this health code violation breeding ground?” He muttered as Bonnie rolled her eyes. “Somewhere quick to stay until we can drive again in the morning. Plus, the ‘hybrid hunters’ or whatever they are called won’t think to look here for the almighty Klaus Mikaelson.” Bonnie said. Klaus let out a groan as he sat up some. Whatever the headhunters stabbed him with had been slowly working its way through his body. Bonnie grabbed his wallet before opening it. “Klaus, do you not own a card?” She muttered, checking his pockets. He let out a chuckle before shaking his head. “I don’t have anything the bourgeoisie can trace. If they know about it, they will want to steal my money.” Klaus pouted as he tried to sit up. He let out a groan again, pain shooting through his bones.

Klaus rolled his neck as he tried to move again. What started as a dart to the chest turned into angry red and grey veins down his chest, neck, and arm. He felt like his body weighed tons as he sat up again. Bonnie sighed as she watched the older lady at the front go through her record book. It was an old school method of bookkeeping. The woman smiled as she noticed Bonnie looking at the car and then at her. “I think I have just the room for you dearie. Room 409.” She smiled before grabbing the key off the wall and setting it in her hand. Bonnie quickly paid her and rushed to Klaus. She drove to the motel rooms and parked closest to 409. “Okay Klaus, we are on the fourth floor.” She said as he groaned and threw his head back.

“Fucking hell Bonnie. 409? You just love to torture me, huh?” He groaned, sitting up and opening the car door. After what felt like a lifetime, Klaus walked in behind Bonnie. She froze when she realized what room the woman had set her up in. In the middle of the bedroom was a heart-shaped pink bed and red lighting. It was almost like a scene out of a cheesy romcom. Klaus let out a weak chuckle as he saw the bed. “You just couldn’t resist me, could you love?” Klaus smirked as he walked up behind her. Before she could protest, he was lying on the bed. She just sighed and grabbed Gram’s grimoire. 

“Okay, you said I need to mix the ingredients all at once before heating them?” She asked over the phone as Sheila walked her through it. “If you don’t mind me asking, baby, why are you helping this fool?” Sheila asked as Klaus let out a pained chuckle. “He’s paying me, plus it keeps the hunters off of everyone’s backs while I drive around with him.” Bonnie sighed as she ground the ingredients in a mortar and pestle. Klaus scrunched his nose up at the smell. “God that fucking stinks. What is that absolutely putrid smell?” He gagged as Bonnie rolled her eyes. “Can it beowulf ” She said, already sick of his complaining. For the past four hours, it has been nonstop complaining. Between her driving skills, her stopping to gather ingredients, the car she was driving, the motel location, the state they were in, and now the smell. She was sick of him. Klaus let out a growl as his eyes flashed black and yellow.

“Try it. Remember, I’m the one helping you.” She said as he let out another groan. She smirked before going back to talking to Grams. Once she was done, she stared at her salve proudly. She pulled out a Polaroid camera and proudly took a few photos of her work. “Once you and your ointment are done having a photoshoot, do you mind you know... applying it?” Klaus said as Bonnie rolled her eyes. “I’m gonna enjoy this next part.” She said, pulling out an apatite dagger. She walked over to him and straddled his hips, not even thinking about the position. She cut his shirt open as he smirked. “At least take me to dinner first love. I am not just some common whore.” He chuckled weakly as she rolled her eyes. She began to chant a spell, slicing his skin open. To his surprise, the cut didn’t hurt. Maybe he was focused on the pain shooting through his body. That or the fact that a goddess was straddling his hips. 

Bonnie kept chanting as she grabbed the salve and began to spread it over the cut. She soon pressed her fingers in the cut, pushing some of the salve into his chest. Klaus groaned as he felt pain shooting from the cut. He breathed heavily, his eyes rolling back. He wasn’t sure if this was some form of sick foreplay for him or if this was his body’s reaction to this much pain all at once. His ears started ringing as Bonnie’s chants grew louder. After what felt like eternity, he began to come back to reality. The ringing stopped, and so did the pain. Klaus sat up on his elbows as Bonnie stepped back to look at her work. “There we go, good as new.” She smiled as he looked at his body. He was back to his normal look, and the pain was a thing of the past.

“I underestimated you, little witch. Seems you are a lot more powerful than many let on.” Klaus smiled as Bonnie rolled her eyes again. “Go get our luggage from the car.” She sighed, walking to clean up her mess. Klaus smiled before zooming out of the room. He was back in under 5 minutes. “You packed light I see. Plan to just walk around in my clothes?” He hummed as Bonnie snorted. “Hopefully, we aren’t gone for long. Elijah already has his hunting party out to work on eliminating them.” She hummed as Klaus nodded. “Looks like you have it all planned out love. I’m proud of you.”  Klaus smiled as Bonnie rolled her eyes. She still smiled despite her brain screaming at her not to. She couldn’t help her attraction to the original hybrid; hell, it was the only reason she was helping him. She still hadn’t forgiven him for all the events that followed when he came into town. It’s like after the ritual, her magic may have been stronger, but emotionally, everything went wrong. Tyler had to skip town for his safety, her and Caroline had a huge falling out, her and Elena fell out after Jeremy kissed her, her and Jeremy had a falling out after Bonnie realized she only wanted him because she wanted normalcy, and then little by little everything else around her changed.

Klaus could see her lost in thought as she looked at the grimoire in front of her. “So, what’s for dinner?” He hummed while opening his suitcase. He pulled out a pair of sweats before dropping his towel and putting them on. Bonnie gasped and covered her eyes with her hands. She quickly blushed and tried to hide the giggle in her throat. “You could have at least warned me.” She said as he chuckled. “For what? My body is amazing.” Klaus smirked as he crossed his arms. Bonnie rolled her eyes again and grabbed her phone. “Italian, Mexican, or Chinese?” She asked as he grabbed some menus from the drawer. “Chinese, call it in and I’ll go pick it up.”  Klaus hummed before Bonnie rolled her eyes. “Yes, leave out and get poisoned again.” She said before adding what she wanted to the cart on her phone. “I will order it on my phone,” Bonnie said before letting him put what he wanted in the cart.

A few hours later, the room was filled with laughter and happiness. They were sitting on the floor, eating and talking about life. Bonnie was honest;y amazed at how much Klaus had experienced in the 1000 years he had been alive. “How come you never publish your paintings?” She asked as he shook his head. “It draws attention to me. If the government finds out that I haven’t paid taxes, they’ll come after my money. They come after my money, and I will become public enemy number 1.” Klaus hummed as he looked at her. She let out a laugh before shaking her head. Once they were done eating, Klaus grabbed their trash and threw it away. Bonnie walked to start her night routine in the bathroom.

Klaus listened to her humming and felt locked in domestic bliss. The thought of her standing there in a towel while she applied whatever face creams and looking in the mirror made his chest tighten. She walked out wearing an oversized shirt like a night gown, and he felt his mind go blank. He wanted to pretend the shirt was his. She had this cute yellow bonnet on that was tied in the front in a bow. He smiled and watched as she crossed her arms. “So…I guess we really have to share the bed.” She sighed as he smiled. He lifted the blanket for her to climb beside him. Bonnie wanted to say no, but realized it was either the bed or the seedy looking couch.

She sighed as she climbed into bed beside him and looked up at him. “Hands to yourself, mister. Any funny business and you will lose them.” She threatened as he smiled and held his hands up innocently. “Yes ma’am” he chuckled before putting his hands where they could be seen. Bonnie laid down with her back to him and scrolled on her phone for a little. “Wait, why are you even in bed? You don’t need to sleep.” She said as she turned her head slightly to look at him. Klaus smiled as he rolled over to face her. “I do need to sleep. Shockingly enough, after the ritual, I’ve been needing to sleep more often.” He hummed as Bonnie just nodded. After what felt like two hours later she finally locked her phone and closed her eyes. She felt hands on her sides, and before she could speak, Klaus suddenly yanked her into his body. He was asleep behind her as he buried his face in her neck. Bonnie opened her mouth to complain as he let out a quiet whine. “Just…just please let me hold you. Your skin is so soft.” He mumbled tiredly as he pulled her closer. Bonnie closed her eyes and moved closer before letting herself drift off to sleep.

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

let us take a moment and grieve for all the lives lost. so many thousand people have been murdered by the zionist entity in the last fifteen months. palestinians in gaza have lost too much, from friends and family to their homes and livelihood.

this ceasefire is not an end to our solidarity with gaza. we will all be here waiting and praying for palestine to be wholly liberated from the occupation and watch her people be happy and free.

in the meantime, please keep donating to palestinian fundraisers. it is essential to support families planning on rebuilding.

alaa is a mother of two young children. her fundraiser has been verified. i request you to help her by sharing and donating to her gofundme.

please donate here

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

*gripping your shoulders and shaking you* you gotta promise me one thing, if nothing else. you have to promise me to live, do you hear me. and if it's for nothing else but spite, LIVE. donald trump wants you to feel defeated and alone. let's show him and all the americans who voted for him that we will not stay quiet, we will not be devided and we will LIVE. we will survive that 78-year old asshole, we will OUTLIVE him. so please reach out to friends and family, reach out to each other and STAND TOGETHER.

PLEASE, LIVE!

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

To the men who voted for Donald Trump today:

When your girlfriend gets pregnant, and you’re not ready to become a father, and you’re forced into a position that cripples you emotionally, financially and irreversibly, remember: you did this.

When your sister’s pregnancy turns out to be ectopic, and she can’t get the life-saving medical care she needs and dies a completely pointless, preventable death, remember: you did this.

When your 12-year-old daughter is raped by her soccer coach — after he’s legally allowed to strip off her pants and peep at her genitals, because the existence of trans kids terrifies you — and she steals your shotgun and kills herself in your garage, remember, first and foremost: you did this.

Hundreds of thousands of people are going to die because of the decision you made today.

You did that.

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

At some point "fanfic can be as good as professional writing" became "fanfic should be as good as professional writing" and that's caused major damage to fandom spaces.

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

This is rough, have any advice on not fucking killing myself?

I know there are a lot of people thinking about killing themselves right now. I felt the exact same way in 2016 when he first got elected.

This is a bad thing, but to anyone having these types of thoughts, please don't do anything that can't be undone. This is the last term he can be be inaugurated, after these 4 years, or hopefully less, he will be gone. It's difficult to stay positive right now, and that's okay. You don't have to stay positive, it's okay to feel these emotions as they are. But please do not commit suicide, because if you do, you won't be able to feel any emotions ever again.

Even though I felt hopeless at the time, I am so glad that I didn't kill myself in 2016.

For my own sake, I really need the people who are upset with this election to stay alive with me

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

i got too optimistic and forgot kamala harris was dealing with the combined powers of racism and misogyny

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

Dear Undecided and Both Sides are Evil voters.

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

To all Americans out there:

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

This was Hillary's final rally in Philadelphia in 2016. She had a crowd size of 40,000+ people. If you think you don't have to vote because the numbers appear good for Harris right now, think again. It's not over until it's over. Vote.

[mikaelsonstanaccount]

A friendly reminder to USians: if you are planning to vote on Election Day, your mantra is "Nothing I see today convinces me not to go vote."

Exit polls suggest DT cannot be caught? YOU STILL GO VOTE.

Exit polls suggest KH has it in the bag? YOU STILL GO VOTE.

Pundits are saying the country is swinging overwhelmingly red? YOU STILL GO VOTE.

Pundits are saying the country is swinging overwhelmingly blue? YOU STILL GO VOTE.

Polls can be misleading (intentionally or not). The methodology can be biased (or simply poor). Early results may not reflect what the full count will show. There may be a red mirage. NOTHING YOU SEE CONVINCES YOU NOT TO VOTE.

The biggest Democratic win in swing states means nothing if democrats don't turn out everywhere to keep the reliably blue states blue.

VOTE. Wear appropriate weather gear if you think you may have to stand in a line outside (coat, hat, gloves, umbrella, sunhat, whatever, you know where you live). Bring water and a snack and something to do (book, game on your phone, podcast and headphones, whatever, you know what you like). GO VOTE.

NOTHING YOU SEE ON ELECTION DAY CONVINCES YOU NOT TO VOTE.