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Fujoshi wife fills her house with chintz knowingly

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Today’s fish thing are these sardine paper clips!

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Today’s fish thing are these fish box cutters!

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why did you just touch me with a 10ft pole

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im doomed by the narrative but the narrative is a bunch of conscious choices i've made in the past

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i hope that someday there will be no more advertisements ever again

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i had a dream that time travel was invented and too many people choose to travel back in time to save the titanic from sinking (the question of whether unsinking of the titanic deserved so much attention in the face of human history was the subject of both heavy academic and online discourse), which caused a rift in the space-time-continuum that led to the titanic showing up indiscriminately all over the world’s oceans and sea in various states of sinking.

this caused a lot of issues both in terms of fixing said space-time-continuum and in terms of nautical navigation, and after a long and heavy battle in the international maritime organization it was decided that the bureaucratic burden of dealing with this was to be upon Ireland, much to their dismay. the Irish Government then released an app for all sailors and seafarers so they could report titanic sightings during their journeys, even though they heavily dissuaded you from reporting them given the paperwork it caused.

anyway i woke up with a clear image of the app in my head and needed to recreate it for all of you:

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do job interviewers know we’re all going to die one day

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A Predicament

Noone asked for it but here is a little sneak peek of what happened between the cut in this piece:

...he held that cup for dear life...

~☆◇Prints◇☆~▪︎~☆◇Commissions◇☆~▪︎~☆◇My Peter Pan Webcomic◇☆~▪︎~☆◇My Game on Steam◇☆~▪︎~☆◇For inquiries: ichimakes@gmail.com◇☆~

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Friend entering group chat: Hey guys

Other friend: My pet stag beetle just did a sick flip

First guy: Sick

Other guy: Sick

Guy that makes everything about TMBG: This is just like Insect Hospital by They Might Be Giants

Friend that's stuck in a time loop: TMBG guy deviated last loop

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the way cishet people talk about sex is so fucking depressing. anal sex is kinky. oral is foreplay. i think if you told them sex doesn’t have to involve genitals at all they’d explode

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if you hate jazz you will die and go to hell

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i just want a job

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thats it princess..... spread that vegemite over your toast. youre daddys true blue bogan bitch now. #australiafetish #yankbreaking #yankbreakingkink

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better to have a fitted sheet than shitted feet