minthandsoap

[minthandsoap]

didn’t think this bob would grow on me so easily but my god they look so good here (despite their obvious panic ofc)

[minthandsoap]

JAZ SINCLAIR as MARIE MOREAU GEN V: Season 2 Trailer

[minthandsoap]

TEARS

Never Be The Same- Chapter 8

Stay

- The weight of recent events weighs on everyone, as the couple tries to take a moment to themselves to escape it all... But nothing lasts forever.

(Title Song: Stay by Rihanna ft. Mikky Ekko)

[a/n: A short one. But a doosey. Sorry it took so long. Enjoy.]

CW: Angst. Miscommunication. Overall high emotions.

2.1k words

<-Previous | Next->

The whole car ride home is spent in silence, the heaviness of the situation weighing down on them all. When they eventually pull up to the apartment building, Marie turns off the ignition and no one makes a move to leave yet. After a moment, Jordan starts to get out of the car, but Marie reaches over, placing a hand on their shoulder. Jordan halts their movement, looking back at Marie with a tired and questioning look. Marie looks back to Emma before addressing Jordan. “Hey Em, can I have a minute with Jordan please? We'll meet you inside,” she asks her friend softly, giving her a look that Emma notes, giving back an understanding nod.

“Take all the time you need.” Emma says, giving Marie a reassuring pat on her arm and getting out of the car, leaving the couple to themselves. 

Jordan keeps their eyes on Marie the whole time, waiting to see what she wants. As much as they loved her being back in town, they were admittedly drained (especially emotionally) from their interaction with Andre. Once Emma is inside the building Marie faces forward and starts the engine once again. This earns a confused look from Jordan. “What are you doing?” They ask.

She looks over at them for a second before pulling out and driving back onto the road. “We're going somewhere. Put on your seatbelt.” She adds, simply, not giving Jordan anything to go off in regards to her plans here.

They reluctantly put their seatbelt back on, sighing. “Can I at least know where you're taking me?” 

Marie glaces over, noticing their tense yet exhausted demeanor. “Relax Jordan, I'm not kidnapping you. It's just a short trip. Trust me.” 

Well they definitely trusted her, there was no question about that. And they would argue that this definitely is a kidnapping, but they really weren't feeling up to it, so they relented. “Fine. Whatever…” they sigh, facing forward to the city night streets, trying to see if they could guess where they were headed. 

They'd been driving for almost 20 minutes now, Jordan now giving up on trying to find out where Marie's taking them. The car eventually slowed to a stop, Marie killing the engine and taking a breath. Jordan looks out the window, surprised to find themselves at a park, obviously empty this late at night. “A park?” They ask, turning to look at Marie. 

“Yup.” She responds, taking the keys out the ignition and getting out of the car.

“Okay… why?” They yell after her, also getting out of the car to follow her. Marie doesn't answer them as she makes her way over to the playground, Jordan just behind her. She stops at the swing set, a soft smile finding its way onto her face as she goes to sit down on one of the swings. Jordan takes note of this, looking around, trying to pinpoint what was possibly special about this place. “Um, okay…” Jordan goes to sit down on the empty swing on Marie's left. “Why here?” They ask softly, sensing some emotional significance to this place. 

Marie sighs, before pointing out towards the street. “I used to live just down that road. Before… you know.” She finally looks over to Jordan, meeting their soft gaze. “My sister and I would always come here to hang out whenever we could. She loved these swings.” Marie looks down for a moment, getting a bit emotional reminiscing about her sister. She clears her throat, attempting to recompose herself. “Anyways, anytime I had a particularly rough day, I'd sneak out at night and come here. It's just so quiet and peaceful at night. No one is around to bother you this late.” She shrugs, “I don't know, I thought maybe I'd show it to you and maybe you could use it too-” Marie's ramble is cut short by Jordan, who's now standing in front of her. They move forward, wrapping her up in a big hug, Marie quickly reciprocating it.

Jordan squeezes her tight, burying their face into the crook of her neck, holding her as if they were afraid to let her go. “I missed you.” They mumble to her.

Marie nods, holding on to Jordan as much as she can. “I've missed you too.” she whispers back. Marie nestles into Jordan, feeling right at home in their arms, but a sniffle coming from them causes her to pull back a bit. She's met with a teary eyed Jordan. “Jordan, hey-”

Jordan immediately pulls back, clearing their throat as they wipe their eyes. “Sorry- Sorry, I just-” They switch into their male form, backing up and turning away from her as they try to recompose themselves. 

Marie sighs, shaking her head as she gets up from the swings, stepping closer to Jordan. “No, don't do that, not with me Jordan.” She reaches out to them, to turn them around, which they let her do. 

Jordan looks at her with a tired, tear stained look. They sniffle again, wiping more tears away. “Sorry, I know, I- I'm trying. I'm just…” they take a breath, looking up at the starry night sky for a moment, before looking back down at Marie. “There's just a lot, it's all just a lot. And you know how I get when there's a lot going on, I- I push it all down, I self-destruct or whatever, but-” they pause their rambling for a second as they step closer to Marie, placing her hands into theirs and gently holding them. They look into her eyes as they try to slow themselves down. “But right now… I'm not. Right now, I'm just standing in a park, with you, and- and nothing is moving but me and you. Just- just let me be here, in this moment, with you.” They bring her closer, running their hands up her arms to her elbows and touching their forehead to hers. They look deep into her eyes as their warm breath intermingles with hers in the cold air. “Just for tonight, let's just be here... Please.”

Marie just looks at them, a soft, understanding look on her face as she reaches up to hold Jordan's face in her hands, gently rubbing the tear stains off their cheeks with her thumbs. “Okay.” She whispers, giving a small nod.

Jordan sighs in relief, leaning into Marie's touch. “Thank you.” They whisper back, dropping their hands to her waist, just basking in her presence. 

They stay like that for a couple minutes, holding each other as they gently sway side to side. The warmth of their embrace keeps the cold night breeze at bay as Marie focuses on the sound of Jordan's heart, the steady beat bringing her a sense of comfort that she hasn't felt in a while. She instinctively pulls them closer, wrapping her arms around them, heads resting against each other. She can feel their breath on her face as she leans up, Jordan meeting her halfway till their noses touch. They stay there, lips hovering less than an inch apart from each other. They're hesitating. A few months ago they would have never hesitated to kiss one another, but at this moment, the last time they kissed was weeks ago. They've just been apart for too long. So what were they waiting for? Jordan thought before closing the distance between them, not wasting another second. Lips crash together as they melt into each other, the kiss immediately deepening as they grip the other as if it were the last time they ever would. One of Jordan's hands gently holds Marie's jaw, the other gripping her hip as Marie's hands tangle into Jordan's hair, keeping them close. And it's as if everything is right again. Any and all problems and troubles going on in their lives fade away. There's no work or college or Vought, and they aren't miles away from each other. It's perfect, they're perfect, this moment is perfect. But then, a small nagging thought reminds Marie… perfect doesn't last. 

The thought worms its way into Marie's head, ripping the curtains down and blinding her with reality, her responsibilities. As perfect as this moment is, as much as she loves Jordan, she knows this can't last forever. She's been wrestling with these thoughts for a while now. She wants it to last, she wishes she could stay here in their arms forever, but she has to go back to Maryland, back to school and work and… Annabeth. 

In between all the chaos of balancing school and work, she resumed her search for her sister. She has found something, a clue. She saw a photo from a Facebook account, she recognized a face that could belong to a slightly older version of her little sister. She wasn't tagged, but she tried her best to follow the rabbit hole, figuring out the others in the picture, who took the picture, where it was taken. It could be leading to nothing, another dead end, but Marie feels it, in her gut, that she's close to something. She can't give up on that. 

Jordan feels Marie tense up in their arms, causing them to pause, pulling back to make sure she's alright. Their eyes meet for a second before Marie quickly shifts her gaze away from them. She takes a step back, putting some distance between her and Jordan, but they follow her step, reaching out to hold her arms. Jordan desperately tries to get Marie to look at them, gently squeezing her arms to get her attention. Marie closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, trying to steady herself. She reminds herself that she can't get pulled back into the moment, or she might never be able to leave. They've had their moment, and they'll have another one the next time she can visit. They're busy people, they both have responsibilities that they can't ignore. They can't stay.

Jordan doesn't even bother speaking. They've had their fair share of arguments today. They knew she was gonna pull away again, like she always does. They know she has to drive back to Maryland in the morning, but they thought they had more time, that maybe they'd be able to convince her to stay just a little longer till she actually had to go back. They know her schedule, basically memorized it, and she doesn't have any classes tomorrow, and she can afford to miss one shift to spend time with them, cause she hardly ever does anymore. Of course Jordan is thinking the worst, that she's leaving them, finally fed up with them, moving on with her life. But no, that's not Marie. She wouldn't do that, would she?

Regardless, they've been here before. They know why she isn't looking at them, but still they stare at her, begging her to look back, just this once, and just stay with them. They take a breath, stepping closer and holding her jaw in their hand, trying to get her to look up at them. She lets Jordan lift her head up, as she steadies her breathing, preparing herself to look them in the eye. She opens her eyes, looking right at them. As much as it hurts her to look into their deep, pleading eyes, she knows they'll understand. If anyone understands prioritizing academics and future career, it's Jordan. It was one of the many things she admired about them. And Jordan would understand Marie focusing on finding Annabeth, (Though, she hasn't told them yet. She was trying her best to not get her hopes up. If this path actually leads somewhere, then she'll tell them). Besides, this will only hurt for a moment, but they will be back together again. They always come back together. That's what she holds on to as she steps back, gently pulling herself out of their hold. “I have to drive back to Maryland tomorrow. We should get going.” She speaks in a flat tone as walks past Jordan and back towards the car. 

All Jordan can do is watch as she walks away from them. They hate seeing her walk away. They used to not mind because they knew she'd always come back, but this time… they weren't so sure. 

— 

The ride home is spent in complete silence, neither of them wishing to acknowledge the multitude of unsaid words they really should be communicating with each other. Once they get back to the apartment, Marie b-lines to Emma's room, closing the door behind her before Jordan could do anything. They sigh, switching to their fem form as they shove their jacket off and throw it on the couch. They walk over, pausing for a moment as they contemplate walking into Emma's room, but they give up, walking into their own room and slamming the door shut behind them. 

…She was gone by morning.

--

[Finally did the thing! So sorry it took me so long to upload this. Things just kept getting in the way. But here it is! It's a pretty short one, but it's also filled with angst. Thank you so much for reading my stuff, I'm glad people are enjoying it. And a huge thanks, once again, to Venus @minthandsoap 💜 for helping me out big time with this fic. I'm considering this the end of this act of sorts. Kinda. Really just me saying the next update won't be for a while. Kinda waiting till life calms down a bit, so maybe around august. Until then, thanks for reading.]

Much love, 😎👍❤️

-PB

[minthandsoap]

paperdoll201> minthandsoap

pending finally updating my stories i���ve changed my username fucking finally

interact if you’ve seen this puhlease

[minthandsoap]

this is insane because they look nothing alike? the locs aren’t even the same length

The amount of people either confusing Marie with Sage or thinking that Sage must be Marie's sister is really saying a lot about the greater fandom... the only things they have in common aesthetically are big eyes, locs and being hot.

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CLAUDIAAAAAAAA

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEREK ✨🎉💃🏾🎊🤎

birthday boy (june 24th)

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A little more about this effort - please read and donate -

(This is their linktree).

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Never Be The Same- Chapter 7

All For Us

- Jordan, Emma, and Marie confront Andre, demanding an explanation in regards to his new job.

(Title song: All For Us by Labrinth & Zendaya)

[a/n: This one's a little bit heavy. Tears may have been shed. But I love angst so we ride.]

CW: mentions of drug use, cigarettes, sense of betrayal, emotional hurt.

3k words

<-Previous | Next->

Bad Habits. Everyone has them. Jordan has their fair share of bad habits, though, some people might call them something else; dependencies, unhealthy coping mechanisms, whatever the fuck. But Jordan prefers to call them bad habits, cause everyone has them, it's only human.

So, there Jordan sits in the driver's seat of their Dark Blue 2018 Honda Civic, partaking in one of their many bad habits. They were meant to be getting gas, which they did, but instead of heading straight back home, they found themselves parked in the middle of an empty parking lot, windows rolled down, and a lit cigarette in hand. 

They sat there in female form, taking a drag as they stared off in the distance, contemplating on all the shit going on in their life right now. Even though she wasn't there, they could already hear Marie's voice telling them off about their “nasty habit” as she'd put it, and it's not like they disagree either. It really is an ugly habit that developed as an adolescent act of rebellion, which only became more frequent the more they realized how shitty life was to deal with sober. They had tried to quit a few times since then, only picking it back up when they had a particularly shitty day, but by college “quitting” was really just doing other drugs in place of it. As long as it took the edge off it worked for Jordan.

The longest they'd gone sober (besides a couple drinks and a blunt every now and again. It's not like they were an actual addict.) was when Marie and Emma convinced them to do so a month after Godolkin fell. They actually kept it up for a while too. Marie being there was a big help. With her, they honestly didn't really feel much of a need to get high or drunk. She was more than enough to make them feel good and content with their life. That did of course all change with recent events. 

Since Marie moved away, they did find themselves smoking weed a bit more than usual. But that was just weed, not like it was cigarettes or coke or whatever, and they were also back in school and weed always helped them unwind after a particularly stressful week. But now, Andre's in the Seven, and Vought's back on their radar, and as much as they didn't want to (especially with Marie back in town), they needed something to keep them from fucking exploding. So while they were at the gas station, they bought a pack along with Gatorade, gum, and some car air fresheners, and drove to an empty parking lot by a construction site that they used to frequent (with Andre, actually… fuck).

They just couldn't catch a fucking break, could they? Frustrated, they put out the cigarette and threw it out the window, the entire pack following after it. They chugged some Gatorade, popped a stick of gum, hung up one of those silly tree shaped car air fresheners, and made their way back home.

—

Later that day, Jordan found themselves back at that same parking lot. Except this time, Marie and Emma were in the car with them. It was dark out, the sun having set not too long ago. Jordan sat in the driver's seat in their female form, all their nervous energy manifesting as incessant finger tapping. Jordan's eyes flickered around from mirror to mirror, watching and waiting for a certain someone to show up. 

“Can you please stop with the fucking finger tapping? It's a steering wheel, not a fucking drum.” Emma exclaimed from the backseat, clearly annoyed. 

“Well, sorry if I'm a bit on edge, Emma! How about you leave me the fuck alone?” Jordan snapped back, the tense energy getting to them.

“Hey! How about we all just fucking breathe for a second, yeah?” Marie interrupted from the passenger side. She turned to look between the two of them. “We're all on edge, alright? But it's almost 10:30 so let's get our shit together before Andre shows up, okay?” 

“Fine.”

“Fine.” 

Jordan and Emma mutter in unison. Jordan stops their tapping and Emma leans back against the window and takes a breath.

Marie reaches over and gently places a hand on Jordan's knee, looking into their eyes once she has their attention. “Hey, it is going to be alright, you know.”

Jordan sighs and nods their head. “Yeah, I know. I'm just… I don't know.” They shake off the thought of how they really feel about this situation. Facing someone they considered a close friend, the third close friend that they would lose within the past year. It was just too much and they really didn't want to think about it. 

Marie nods understandingly. “It's okay. I get it. Just remember, you're not doing this alone. Emma and I are right here, and we're all in this together.”

Jordan looks forward, biting their lip a bit to hold back a smile. But they couldn't help the small breathy laugh that escaped.

Marie gives them a confused look, “What?” she asks, curiously.

“It's nothing, really. Just- just ignore me.” Jordan says, still trying to hold their laughs in.

“No, tell me! Come on, why are you laughing?” She nudges them lightly. “Was it my speech?” 

Jordan clears their throat in attempts to recompose themselves, looking back at Marie. “No, your speech was great, babe! Very comforting. It's just…” another chuckle escapes as Jordan explains themselves. “You said “We're all in this together” and all I could think about was fucking High School Musical.” A smile makes its way onto Jordan's face. “I was laughing at myself, okay? Not you.”

“Dude! I fucking LOVED High School Musical as a kid! That was my shit!” Emma exclaims from the back seat, leaning forward to be included in the conversation.

Marie can't help the smile that makes it onto her face, mirroring Jordan's. Hell, seeing Jordan's smile always made her want to smile just as big. She lets out a chuckle. “It was kinda silly, wasn't it.”

“Maybe a little bit.” Jordan answers, glad Marie was laughing along now. “It did help break the tension.” 

“Seriously guys, when are we doing a High School Musical marathon? We need to do one!” Emma pleaded, but they were all interrupted when a pair of headlights appeared in front of them.

As the lights turned off they finally recognized the car in front of them as Andres. Everyone went silent, the previously light atmosphere now replaced with the same tension from before. Jordan shifted to their male form before taking a deep breath.

They watch as Andre steps out of the black Audi R8 convertible. Once out, he raises his hands to show that he means no harm. Marie looks back to the others in the car. “We ready?”

“As ready as I can be.” Emma replied.

Jordan nods, eyes still looking at and around Andre to make sure he was really alone. “Here goes fucking nothing.” They say, opening the car door and stepping out, Marie and Emma following after.

“You alone?” Jordan asks as they scan the area. 

“As alone as I can be.” Andre responds with a shrug. 

Jordan just stares at Andre, making it clear that they weren't here to fuck around. “Yeah, I'm alone.” Andre says, dropping the sarcastic tone. 

Jordan glances over at Marie, who nods her head, confirming that Andre was telling the truth. The three friends stand side by side, facing Andre who's standing in front of his car. “You care to explain why you fucking betrayed us?” Jordan blurted out, disdain clear in their voice. 

Marie turns to look at them, placing a hand on their shoulder. “Hey, we said we'd leave the accusations for after he explains himself.” Marie mutters.

“No, it's fine Marie. I get it. I will explain myself and hopefully you guys can understand that I did this for you.” Andre voiced. Jordan scoffs, shaking their head, but opting to listen to Marie and remain silent. 

Marie takes her eyes off of Jordan and looks to Andre. “Just explain what happened, Andre.” Marie spoke, clearly tired of the conflict. She just wants to know why Andre did what they did. There was no taking it back at this point, and she was really hoping she wouldn't be losing a friend here.

Andre clears his throat and prepares to tell his side of the story. “A few months ago I was visiting my dad, and as I was leaving a woman came up to me and told me that Ashley Barrett wanted to talk to me. And of course I was fucking shocked, cause why the hell would the CEO of Vought want to talk to me? After months of visiting my dad there, no one bothered me- no one bothered us, and I didn't know what to do so I said no.” Andre takes a breath, running a hand over his hair. “But then, she mentioned how apparently, Ashley was the one paying to keep my dad alive this whole time.”

Andre looks away, wringing his hands together, nervously. He clears his throat again to distract from the emotion rising in his chest. “They said they could've, and probably should've pulled the plug by now. But Ashley kept him plugged in, and even paid a whole fucking team of scientists to find a cure for this thing.” Andre gestures to his head. 

“Fuck… that sucks.” Emma comments, earning a small chuckle from Andre. 

“Yeah, it fucking does.” Andres eyes are watery, his voice rough from the knot in his throat. 

“So is that why you did it? They're holding your dad over your head as leverage?” Marie asks. Just the idea of Vought doing something like that to Andre pisses her off. 

“Not exactly. When I went up to talk with Ashley she mentioned that my dad's most likely not gonna make it. ‘He's too far gone’ “ Andre said with air quotes. “But by keeping him alive, they could hopefully figure out a cure for me.” Andre explained.

“So it is all about you then? You agreed to join The Seven just so you could use your powers again? And you're not even sure if they'll actually find a way to cure your fucked up head!” Jordan accused, switching into their female form. 

“That's not the only reason! I'm doing this for us. You think I wanna be in The Seven?” Andre retorts.

“Oh, what a fucking sacrifice!” Jordan shouts back. They take a step forward, Andre mirroring the move, and both Emma and Marie go to pull Jordan back.

“How about we don't fight in the middle of a fucking parking lot?” Emma notes as she and Marie make sure there's distance between Jordan and Andre. 

“Yeah, how about we talk like adults instead of fighting like fucking children?” Marie adds. 

Jordan and Andre stare at each other for a moment before relenting. They both take a breath, Andre avoiding eye contact as Jordan continues to glare at them. “Finish the damn story, Andre.” Marie mutters tiredly.

Andre straightens himself out, and continues talking. “Long story short, I talked with Ashley, and she was really fucking weird and intense. She said if I joined The Seven, then Vought would keep leaving you guys alone, so I fucking agreed, okay? Cause yeah, Jordan, it's not that bad of a sacrifice. It's a good deal. I just have to look pretty for Vought and you guys get to live your fucking lives!” Andre exclaimed, leaving the group in a relative silence for a few seconds. 

Jordan continues to stare at Andre, listening to his every word. They didn't know what to think. They hated Andre for folding so easily, walking back into that world like they never left. They also understood wanting to keep Vought out of the others' lives. Marie and Emma especially had bright futures ahead of them that could all come tumbling down if Vought wanted it to. But for the Tenth time in their life, they felt abandoned, left behind to deal with the pain while the others got to move on. 

Jordan felt tears start to prick up but forced them back as they switched back to their male form. “We didn't ask you to do that! You just agreed on the spot and didn't even think about how we would feel about it! I mean, what did you expect from us? After you told your sad little story about how your dad's dying, and now you have to do what you've been trained to do your whole fucking life; being Vought's little bitch!” Everyone looked at Jordan, shocked at their outburst, but Jordan wasn't done. 

They stepped closer to Andre, Marie and Emma throwing themselves in between Jordan and Andre. Marie tried pushing Jordan back, but she might as well be pushing against a brick wall. “What did you expect, huh? You want us to feel bad for you? Say thank you? Thank you, Andre, thanks so much for signing a fucking million dollar contract with a corrupt business, to run around and play fucking hero!” 

“Jordan, stop! Blowing up isn't gonna fix anything!” Marie pleaded, still standing in their way as they continued to walk towards Andre. 

Andre just shook their head, “Nah, you know what? Fuck this. This was clearly a mistake.” Andre turned around and began to walk back to their car. 

Jordan scoffed, “Of course you give up already. Just walking away like a fucking coward! Is this not worth fighting for, Andre? Too fucking difficult for you?” Jordan shouts as Andre makes it to their car door, unlocking the vehicle. 

Andre just bites their tongue. They know there's no winning with Jordan when they're this upset. Maybe they can try again later. 

“I thought we were friends!” Jordan yelled out, eyes watering as their emotions got to them. They wouldn't admit it, but they didn't want Andre to walk away. Basically pleading for him to stay even though they were berating him. 

Andre stops just as they were about to climb into the car. He looks up at Jordan, tears present on his face. He shuts the car door, pocketing the keys and walking over to Jordan, standing a couple feet in front of them. “We are friends, Jordan.” Andre states. 

“Friends don't do this, Andre! They don't abandon you!-” Jordan shouts but is interrupted by Andre. 

“I'm not abandoning you!” Andre declared. 

“Yes you fucking are! You're leaving me behind just like everyone else did!” Tears begin to fall down Jordan's face. Emma and Marie look at each other and silently agree to step back and let the two friends work through their stuff. 

Jordan runs their sleeve across their face, trying to erase the tears, but they keep falling. They clear their throat, attempting to loosen the knot that formed. “You know, when I first met you in my freshman year, I thought you were just another stuck up rich kid that didn't actually give a shit about school, and was just there to fuck around and party. And I was right.” Jordan takes a breath, looking Andre in the eyes. “But you were also the first person to not give a shit about the whole bigender thing. Even before Brink. You were the first person to not give a shit that I was a guy sometimes and a girl at other times.” 

Andre slowly nods as they recall first meeting Jordan, which felt like fucking ages ago at this point. More tears began to stream down his face. “You introduced me to Luke and Cate, taught me how to properly party, and humored me when I'd ramble off on whatever bullshit was happening. You were my first real friend Andre… So why?” Their voice broke as they spoke to Andre. 

Jordan's face was wet with tears, and raw with emotion as they stared back at Andre. “Why didn't you come to me? Why did you just walk away, right into their arms like it was easy? Why didn't you fight harder?” Jordan pleaded, their voice breathy and broken, just above a whisper. 

Andre shakes their head, wiping some tears away and shrugging his shoulders. “I don't know. It seemed like the right thing to do. My dad's dying and I don’t know what I'm gonna do once he does.” Andre couldn't help but laugh at his situation. The laugh was so misplaced, you would have thought he was losing it. “You're right, Jordan, I have nothing going on for me! My whole life, everything I was taught, was to prepare me for this. All I'm good for is running around, playing superhero, and smiling at the camera, so that's what I'm doing! Me being Voughts bitch was inevitable, I thought the least I could do was spare you guys the same fate.” Andre was so tired from their rant, the tears and shouting taking a toll on them.

Jordan looked at Andre, trying to process what they said. They didn't know if there was anything they could say at this point. They didn't feel satisfied with their answers, but they realized if they threw out more words, they'd just be going in circles, the point getting lost in the chaos. So they surrender… 

“Okay.” Jordan nods, accepting his answer. They turn around before Andre can say anything, and walk away. They've fought hard enough.

Jordan goes to open the driver's side door, but Marie stops their movements with a gentle hand on the shoulder. “Is it okay if I drive back?” She speaks softly.

As if they lost all the fight in them, they nod and walk over to the passenger side. They shift into their female form as they climb in, buckling their seat belt and leaning their head against the window. Emma climbs into the back and Marie gets into the driver's seat. She glanced over at Jordan, then back towards Emma, who just shrugs tiredly at her. Marie looks forward, starts the car, and drives off.

--

Much love, 😎👍❤️

That was a fun chapter to write, honestly. Big thanks to @paperdoll201 💜 as always for reading it over and giving very helpful feedback. Tears were shed, lol. But yeah, big thanks to everyone who has read this far. I have one more fully written chapter left that I will post next Saturday. After that, it's guesswork for when the next chapter comes. But yeah, I'll keep you all updated ofc. Thanks for reading!!

-PB

[minthandsoap]

these blurry ass pictures omg

anyways

oh the person i’m about to become for the next 48 hours….. this is me asking for forgiveness in advance

[minthandsoap]

oh the person i’m about to become for the next 48 hours….. this is me asking for forgiveness in advance

[minthandsoap]

happy pride month to limoreau 💙❤️

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🚨With the eyes of humanity, help the Amani family🚨

Look at the website below to read the story of the Amani family and support this family because they deserve it

I hope you share the post🩵

I trust you🙏

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derek luh for americanstudiesmag (feb, 2024) what are your latest google searches?

derek: “regular google searches or incognito mode..? 👀

[minthandsoap]

Reminder to Click for Palestine today!

Thank you for helping how you can!

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update!!!!

Never Be The Same- Chapter 6:

Spies

-Getting a look into what one Andre Anderson has been up to since moving closer to his father, who's still receiving care at Vought tower.

(Title Song: Spies by Coldplay)

[a/n: Huge shout out to Venus (@paperdoll201 💜) for helping me make words word better on this chapter.]

CW: Vought. Betrayal. We move.

2.6k words

<-Previous | Next->

“Mr. Anderson?”

Andre stops walking and turns around to the voice calling after him. He's faced with a young woman in a gray pantsuit, long black hair tied back into a tight ponytail, wearing blue rimmed glasses. Andre had just finished visiting his father, which he usually does every week now. He had never once seen this person before, let alone been approached by anyone who wasn't a doctor or nurse, so this was unusual to say the least. 

“Um, yeah? Who's asking?” Andre asked, cautiously.

“Deborah Walker. I'm an associate of Ashley Barrett.” The woman sticks her hand out for a handshake, but puts it away when Andre decides not to reciprocate.

Andre is shocked when they hear the name Ashley Barrett. Like, The Ashley Barrett?! The current CEO of Vought?! “Wait- what?” Andre asks dumbfounded.

“Ashley Barrett. The CEO of Vought? I'm sure you're familiar, given who your father is.” She answers, adjusting her glasses as she does.

“But-” 

“Regardless, I need you to come with me now. She's expecting you.” The woman spoke before Andre could continue.

“Wait. No. This isn't- I can't go talk to her. I won't talk to her.” Andre stutters out. Sure, he's been visiting his dad at Vought tower for a while now, but he still didn't trust Vought after everything that happened at GodU.

“I see. Well, you are aware that she is the reason your father is still receiving treatment for his condition, correct? I'm sure you'd like to at least thank her for that courtesy.” She adds.

“Wait, she is?” This was news to Andre. It hadn't even occurred to him that his father could possibly not get treatment for his current condition. I mean, why wouldn't he? He's Polarity after all. He has money and resources… Which now that Andre thinks about it, all comes from Vought. God, was he really that stupid that he didn't realize that earlier? 

Deborah Walker patiently waits for Andre to respond and is met with a slow nod. “Okay… Okay I'll go.”

“Great. Right this way, Mr. Anderson.” She turns around and begins to lead him to his destination.

Andre followed her cautiously. What could Ashley Barrett possibly want with him? Vought had left him and his friends alone for almost a year now, so why now? And why the CEO herself? Andre didn't know if he should be scared or not, but against his better judgment, he was mostly curious. So he continued to follow Ms. Deborah Walker down the hall, into the elevator, down another hall, and to a pair of closed double doors.

“Wait here for a moment.” The woman said as she knocked on the door, letting herself in after hearing a voice call out from the other side. 

Andre waited for a few seconds before the doors opened again, Deborah Walker making her way back out. “She's ready for you. Best not to keep her waiting.” And with that, she walked away, leaving Andre there alone. 

With a deep breath, Andre opens the door and walks in…

“Andre Anderson! Glad you could make it, please take a seat.” Ashley gestures to one of the cushioned seats positioned in front of the pristine white couch she was sitting on. “Water?” She asks, already pouring herself a glass from an odd shaped pitcher on the glass coffee table in front of her. 

“No thanks. I'm good.” Andre replies nervously. He goes to sit down, slowly, as Ashley watches his every movement. Despite the smile (which seemed really forced) on Ashley's face, the entire room felt tense, Andre could've sworn someone turned the heater on. “Um… So, what did you want to meet me for?”

“Oh, I just wanted to check in. See how you were holding up. Things have been really tough for you lately, haven't they? Your dad, your friends… Godolkin.” She spoke with clearly feigned sincerity, hinting at an elephant that they both knew was in the room with them.

Andre really wasn't sure how he should respond. What was she trying to get at here? Was she gonna threaten him? After almost a year of silence from both him and his friends, surely she got the point that they weren't gonna spill anything or do anything against Vought anytime soon. All they wanted to do was move on and live their lives, but that was probably just wishful thinking at this point. 

“What do you want?” Andre just went right out with it. They didn't feel like beating around the bush here. They were tired of secrecy and cryptic shadow business shit. 

Ashley's demeanor immediately changed. The fake sincerity dropping like a hot rock. “Straight to business. Okay.” She took a sip of water before continuing. “I want you, Andre. Well, I want Polarity, which is basically you now, so yeah.”

“Wait what? You want Polarity? You want me to be Polarity? But I don't-”

“Before you go off on whatever ‘but I don't want to be Polarity’ speech you're about to pull out your ass, I think it's best you hear all I have to say first.” Ashley finished her glass of water, setting it down on the table and straightening herself out before continuing. 

“First off, I'm going to be real with you and tell you, you don't have a choice. You have the illusion of choice, of course, if that makes you feel better. But you know how this industry works, Andre. You grew up in it. You're a Supe, and Vought needs you to carry on your father's legacy. Let's face it, he's not gonna be back on his feet anytime soon, and I am trying my best to keep him alive for you, and I think that he would want nothing more than to see his son become the hero he was always meant to be.”

Andre was speechless. Clueless to how they should be reacting right now. So they just let her continue.

“Look. We- I have been gracious with you and your friends. Letting you four run around, trying to play house and live ‘normal lives’ as if that's something supes could do. But play time’s over. You've all done a great job at minding your own business and not saying anything about Godolkin, or The Woods, which we are so grateful for and expect all of you to keep up. And now that things have moved on, and more and more people are forgetting about the whole Godolkin incident, it's time we set some more ground rules. First, a quick reminder that we own you. You are all products of Vought, and when we need something from you, we will get it. Which is why it is in your, and your friends, best interest to do so willingly.”

Okay, now Andre has to speak up. “I'll do it. I'll be Polarity, I'll do whatever you need, just keep my friends out of it. You don't need them. They just got back into college, they're doing things they actually want to do with their lives and they're leaving everything that happened at GodU behind. Isn't that enough?” Andre pleads.

Ashley shakes her head, looking at Andre as if he's some confused child. “And here I thought you'd get it more than anyone. Let me spell some things out for you, Andre. Your father is dying. His powers have been slowly killing him and are probably doing the same to you. But, I have some of the best Vought scientists working on something to prevent that from progressing-”

“-You do?” Andre asks, a glint of hope in his voice. 

“Yes, I do. So here's the deal… You work for us. You take the mantle of Polarity, in honor of your father, and join The Seven. You will do exactly as we say, all the interviews, stunts, and sponsorships.” Ashley leans in closer, a somehow more serious demeanor taking form. “You will say what we tell you to say and do what we tell you to do. As long as you do that, I will make sure your father's condition will be fixed, and so will yours. If, of course, he makes it. Till then, I'll make sure he keeps getting the quality care he deserves.” 

It takes a minute, but Andre finds himself slowly nodding to the idea. “I- I can do that.”

Ashley smiles at herself. “Good-”

“But,” Andre interrupts. “I'm not signing anything until you guarantee that Jordan Li, Marie Moreau, and Emma Meyer are left alone by Vought as long as I work for you. I'll make sure they keep to themselves, that they keep keeping quiet about The Woods and all the other shit that happened at Godolkin. Just please, let them live their lives.” Andre basically begs.

Ashely pauses, taking a moment to consider her options. This could work. Allowing the blood girl to pursue medicine and the cricket girl potential fame. Letting their “freedom” give them a sense of security, may prove advantageous and when needed, slap them with a “property of Vought'' sticker. She would have Andre in the Seven, assuring him that Vought would leave his friends alone– he’d be in too deep to do anything about it anyways. And, If things get fucked she will always have a plan B. This could actually fucking work.

“Fine.” Ashley answers, definitively. 

“Wait, really?” Andre says, surprised she actually agreed.

“Yup. But to be clear, if any of them slip up, in any way, it's on you. They can't be caught using their powers to fight crime or anything. They're allowed to live normal lives. Not superhero lives. Also, if you slip up, it's on them now too. I'm sure you don't need me to elaborate on what that means.” She finalizes.

Andre nods, slowly. “Right. Of course. Thank you.”

“No Andre, thank you. I'll have Ms. Walker email you all the information you'll need to proceed. Can't wait to see you in that new polarity suit! Oh, America’s gonna eat you up.” Ashley continues as she pulls out her phone, presumably sending messages to Ms. Walker. “Oh, you can leave now.”

“Oh, okay. Um- thanks.” Andre awkwardly leaves, letting out a breath he didn't know he was holding till he left the building. How was he going to explain this to his friends…

—

 

September…

It’s a chill Saturday morning, Jordan and Emma are both in the living room doing their own things. They sit in a comfortable silence that they only recently managed to achieve. It took a while for them to get used to living together without Marie there to act as a certain buffer between the two, but after much sibling-like bickering and phone calls with Marie, they decided to just cope and live together like adults. They still poke fun and get on eachothers nerves, but they still care about the other at the end of the day. 

Anyways, Jordan is sitting on the couch in male form, laptop in lap and legs propped on the coffee table, finishing up on a cyber defense assignment. Emma, on the other hand, is reading through a script, silently mouthing her lines so as to not distract Jordan (after being told off like five times). They both sit, focusing on their respective work, when the silence is broken by the sound of a vibrating cell phone.

“Think that's yours” Emma says after checking her phone.

Jordan rummages around, moving their various pages of notes around, eventually finding their phone. They smile when they see Marie's name flash up on their screen, answering the phone with a relaxed, “Hey, how's it going? Thought we weren't calling till 1?” 

Marie's response wasn't as relaxed as Jordan's. “Hey, are you watching the TV?”

“Uh, no? Why?” Jordan answers confused and a bit worried by Marie's tone.

“Just turn on the TV.” Marie says hurriedly.

Okay, Jordan's actually starting to get worried now. They motion to Emma to hand them the remote, a confused look making its way onto her face. “What channel?” 

“Doesn't matter.” 

Jordan's about to question why when Emma hands them the remote, but is immediately silenced once they turn it on…

Right there, taking up the whole screen, is none other than Andre Anderson. He's standing on a stage, wearing what looks to be a sleeker, modernized version of the Polarity suit, smiling and waving at the audience. To his right is Ashley Barrett and to his left is Homelander himself. The headline reads “New Addition to The Seven: A new Polarity steps into the light, taking on his father's legacy”. 

Emma and Jordan stare at the television in awe, so much so that Jordan jumps when they hear Marie talk through the phone. “Jordan? You still there?”

“Uh- yeah- I'm here… what the fuck?!” Jordan explodes once realization hits. What the fuck is Andre doing standing with The CEO of Vought and fucking Homelander of all people?! He swore he'd let them know if Vought ever reached out to him. How long has this been going on for? Was he in with Vought from the start? Spying on them and keeping tabs just to report back? Confusion and shock turn to anger and pure frustration, with hurt and betrayal lurking just beneath the surface. “What the fuck is Andre doing with Vought!?”

“I don't fucking know! I thought you or Emma might know something!” Marie exclaims through the phone. “Is Emma there?”

Jordan doesn't respond. Just puts the phone on speaker and point Emma to it. Emma looks equally upset at the situation, but mostly confused. “Marie? Andres in the fucking Seven?! What the fuck is going on?” Emma shouts to the phone. 

“I don't know. I thought you guys would know something, but obviously not. I haven't talked to Andre since before I left for Maryland.” Marie explains.

“He fucking betrayed us.” Jordan switches to their female form. “He could have told us about this at any point but he didn't. Who knows how long he's been working for Vought.” Jordan spoke bitterly, still staring daggers at Andre through the screen, silently wishing he could feel their burning gaze. 

“We don't know that,” Emma says, looking at Jordan worryingly. The anger radiating off them was a bit unsettling for her. Sure, she was also upset, but Jordan sounded like they were about to murder Andre. “For all we know Vought could be threatening him or something.”

They can hear Marie sigh through the phone. “I don't know guys. I don't know what to think. All I know is Andre did betray us, whether he meant to or not, and we're all pissed. But we should talk to him before doing anything rash that can put us in danger… okay?”

“Yeah, I agree.” Emma answers swiftly.

Jordan takes a minute to answer, a million thoughts running through their head. They know they should get their anger under control and not do anything stupid, but it's hard. They've already been betrayed by one friend, along with a mentor,  and now here's another one, digging a knife in right next to the others. They clench their fist and try to breathe, focusing on Marie's words. “Fine.” Is all they manage to get out. 

“Okay. Good. I should be able to drive over today, just need to do a couple things first. I'll see you guys later.” She hangs up before any of them can say something.

Marie was a very busy person, especially since she started college. She's aiming to finish her undergrad a year early so she has a bigger workload, and she's still working part time on top of that. So Jordan and Emma were both ready to argue for her to stay in Baltimore so she can focus on her own shit and they would deal with Andre themselves, but there's no way she would listen, and Jordan doesn't blame her. This is serious, and they have to deal with it as soon as possible if they want to live the life they want. Vought’s butting back into their life and they won't let that slide.

--

Late night post be like.

It's only 11 for me, so it's still (fucking) Saturday! Thanks so much for reading this far!

Much Love, 😎👍❤️

-PB