misfit-group-chat

[misfit-group-chat]

Message Five - Aliens

Toby and her Bois

creamsTHICCle: which dumbass is willing to take me to the raid on Area 51???

Fitz the Father: were Kiwis?????

0 days w/o Drugs: why go there when I’m an alien right here? 👽

Dominant Gay: New Horror Movie

Dominant Gay: The Creature under the Helmet

Reckless with Edibles: I’d pay to see that

0 days w/o Drugs changed their name to Area 51 Reject

Area 51 Reject: We apart of the Kyles or Naruto Rumners?

Dominant Gay: Clearly the minecrafters in the back digging their way in

Reckless with Edibles: I call texting the aliens were here

Fitz the Father: We are NOT going to the Area 51 raid

creamsTHICCle: hey google how do I cancel 6 plane tickets to Nevada

Dominant Gay:

Dominant Gay: We go without him

Reckless with Edibles: We about to go HAM on the US alien base

Area 51 Reject: We’ve got Shaggy, Chuck Norris, Betty White and Keanu Reeves. What can go wrong?

Fitz the Father: my children

Fitz the Father: y Tho

creamsTHICCle: You’re not my dad!

Fitz the Father: I am your dad now get out of the fucking tank

creamsTHICCle: I’m in a tank and you’re not!

Convicted Cunt: He’s my dad fuck off, cunt

Reckless with Edibles: Thank you, Mason, for the contribution to the conversation

Fitz the Father: Mason, I’m not just your dad

Convicted Cunt: I want a sister tho

Convicted Cunt: and an alien

Dominant Gay: he’s on our side!!

Fitz the Father: why are you all against me?!?!?!

Area 51 Reject: because you a buzzkill not letting us live our alien meme dreams

creamsTHICCle: We will get aliens, no matter what

Dominant Gay: I will use you as a sacrifice if I have to

Fitz the Father: Find. When is this thing

Reckless with Edibles: We’re not saying because we’re not inviting you

Fitz the Father: omfg really?

Area 51 Reject: Area 51 is a Fitz free zone.

[misfit-group-chat]

Message Four - The Band’s all here

So, I’m gonna try and be more consistent with these because I can and these act as kinda a nice warmup before I start seriously writing. Also I started this before the newest podcast and OMG YOU GO GIRL YOU BE YOU AND BRAVE MY QUEEN!!!! So I had to pepper in that fact. Probably won’t be a big point unless she decides to go further but, who knows? Just enjoy!

DONT DO FUCKIG DRUGS

Dominant Gay: so very important question

Dominant Gay: am I the only homo here?

iNutterButter: no I too take dick

iNutterButter: but I like the closet tho

Dominant Gay: understood, have a nice day

0 days w/o Drugs: I’m bi and high

Convicted Cunt: Is vape lord a sexuality?

0 days w/o Drugs: should be but no

creamsTHICCle: I’m Demi BiRomantic

Convicted Cunt: then whatever the Spanish bread one is

Dominant Gay: Pan?

Convicted Cunt: that or whatever

0 days w/o Drugs: masons so chill about this y ain’t everyone?

Dominant Gay: What about Fitz?

iNutterButter: I thought you guys were bfs?

Dominant Gay: Please let that stand for best friends

iNutterButter: it does I’m stupid

iNutterButter: Also, while I remember

iNutterButter changed their name to King of Edibles

0 days w/o Drugs changed King of Edibles name to Reckless with Edibles

Reckless with Edibles: yeah okay that’s fair

creamsTHICCle: thanks Swagger

Dominant Gay: @Fitz the Father ArE yOu GaY oR nOt?!

Fitz the Father: No comment

0 days w/o Drugs: I’m curios now tho tell or be kicked

Fitz the Father: I created this char you can’t

Fitz the Father: *chat

Fitz the Father has been voted off the island!

0 days w/o Drugs: watch me bitch

creamsTHICCle: cool exit message

Reckless with Edibles: I think there’s a setting

Convicted Cunt: I WANT TO GET KICKED

Fitz the Father has their position reinstated!

Dominant Gay: We can kick him AFTER we figure out if he’s gay.

0 days w/o Drugs: FiNe.

Fitz the Father: I’m queer

creamsTHICCle: And?

Fitz the Father: that’s it. That’s as much as I know.

Fitz the Father: What more do you cunts want?

0 days w/o Drugs: he stays for now

Dominant Gay: Also, can you guys use she/her pronouns for me?

Dominant Gay: I’m … trans actually. And I like women.

Reckless with Edibles: we stan one queen, and her name is Toby

Dominant Gay renamed the chat “Fitz and the Gays”

Fitz the Father: I’m also something gay but okay

0 days w/o Drugs: it’s our new band name just roll with it

Convicted Cunt: I call drummer

creamsTHICCle: backup singer so I can say I was there when everything went to shit

Reckless with Edibles: Band Drug Dealer

0 days w/o Drugs: That’s my job wym

Reckless with Edibles: Okay.

Reckless with Edibles: I’m the manager who doesn’t give a shit but is mom same time

0 days w/o Drugs: You’re Hired!

Dominant Gay: Fitz, you want guitar or lead?

Fitz the Father: We are NOT starting a band!!

Dominant Gay: I repeat the question

Dominant Gay: Fitz, you want guitar or lead?

Fitz the Father: *sigh*

Fitz the Father: Guitar

0 days w/o Drugs renamed the chat “Toby and her Bois”

Fitz the Father: we’ve had this band two minutes and already we’re changing th name?

0 days w/o Drugs: Leas always get spotlight

Convicted Cunt: Dad it’s official!!! I’m in a band!!

Dominant Gay: I’m not complaining

Dominant Gay: I’ve got my spotlight, ice got my boys

Fitz the Father: I know and I’m proud, Mason

Dominant Gay: my work here is done

creamsTHICCle: so who’s gonna write our first single?

Reckless with Edibles: yeah the band think probably won’t work out

[misfit-group-chat]

Message Three - Let’s Get Gayer

DONT DO FUCKIG DRUGS

iNutterButter: guys I just met the best person ever and I want to ass him

creamsTHICCle: damn Matt. I knew you were gay but not THAT gay

iNutterButter: *add

iNutterButter: you don’t get a say in this

creamsTHICCle: I’m here so I do <3

iNutterButter: does someone have an emoji for the vine where the guy throw the love in the blender

Fitz the Father: who’s the guyv

iNutterButter: this dude who I met

iNutterButter: threw Glitter Bomb at homophobes

Swagger [High] changed their name to 0 days w/o Drugs

iNutterButter: So. Much. Glitter.

iNutterButter: Really?

0 days w/o Drugs: Sorry, continue

creamsTHICCle: pics?

iNutterButter: better. Video

iNutterButter: [Video Sent]

(Video begins. Part of Matt’s face is shown with three guys in the background. They’re screaming homophobic slurs away from Matt. The camera turns to an open window, where a Rainbow Pride Flag is flying. A man pops out, yells “Jealous Cishets are Illegal!!” Before throwing a balloon out the window. Camera follows it to the ground, where it explodes all over the four men. Men as disgusted and walk away mumbling. Matt still sits there, stunned, with Glitter all over his back. He makes no effort to move. End of Video.)

Convicted Cunt: how does someone fit that much glitter into a balloon

0 days w/o Drugs: the world may never know

creamsTHICCle: glorious

iNutterButter: Permision to add him?

0 days w/o Drugs: I think it’s a crim if you don’t

Fitz the Father: omg that’s fucking Toby.

iNutterButter: YOU KNOW HIM?!?!

Fitz the Father: THATS MY BEST FRIEND

0 days w/o Drugs: I THOUGHT I WAS YOUR BEST FRIEND

Convicted Cunts: I WANT TO FUCK SOMETHING

Fitz the Father: that’s for contributing, son.

iNutterButter:

creamsTHICCle: just add him, Fitz or iNutt

iNutterButter: yeah I’ve got to change this name to something creative

Fitz the Father added TOBY to the chat!

Toby: the QUEEn has arrived, bitches

Toby: Hey Cam

Fitz the Father: Hey Toby

Fitz the Father: So, glitter bombing homophobia is your strategy now?

Toby: id try arson, but that’s technically illegal

Convicted Cunt: I like him

0 days w/o drugs: of course you do, Mason

Toby changed their name to Dominant Gay

creamsTHICCle: whos the sub

Dominant Gay: Everyone else

creamsTHICCle: F for the straights

Convicted Cunt: 🔪

0 days w/o Drugs: 💣

Dominant Gay: 🔥

Fitz the Father: why are my children like this

[misfit-group-chat]

Message Two - Adoption

DONT DO FUCKIG DRUGS

Swagger [High]: Hi! I’m starting a GoFund me for my roommate’s bail. Helpful if you guys donated

iNutterButter: Yeah I’m gonna need more than that

iNutterButter: Also why is my name this?

Fitz This Mess: ^^

Fitz This Mess: The first not second

Swagger [High]: He said he was leaving to either get ice cream or commit a felony but he wasn’t sure which

Fitz This Mess: Just add him here

Swagger [High]: I think it’ll be the ladder

Swagger [High]: ok

iNutterButter: *latter

Swagger [High]: stfu Matt

iNutterButter: also name

Swagger [High] added MASON to the chat

Mason: Sup cunts.

Mason: Also, Swagger what flavor you want

Swagger [High]: oh thank fuck

Mason: Nevermomd they won’t let me in cause I have no clothes

Swagger [High]: MASON!!

Fitz This Mess: where are you I’m bringing you clothes

Mason: y?

Fitz This Mess: I’ve had yo for two mins and he’s my son now. Where?

Fitz This Mess changed their name to Fitz the Father

Swagger [High] changed MASON’s name to Convicted Cunt

Convicted Cunt: [Location Sent]

Fitz the Father: On my way

Fitz the Father: Change the name

Swagger [High]: No fucka you

iNutterButter: Nobody has told me who changed me name

creamsTHICCle: That’s What happens when you take 9 edibles

iNutterButter: I Fucking Knew It

[misfit-group-chat]

Message One - Formation

CAMERON started the chat!

CAMERON named the chat “Group Project Cunts”

CAMERON added ERIC and MATT to the chat

Cameron: Alright Cunts what we doing about this goddamn English project

Eric: can’t high

Matt: hi, Matt’s roommate Jay here. Matt is off his mind on 9 edibles

Cameron: 9? Aren’t those 100 mili each?

Matt: Yep

Matt: Also ...

MATT changed their name to iNutterButter

iNutterButter: that’ll be fun when he not off his mind

Cam: Cna I have one?

Cam: *Cam

Cam: *Can. FUCK

iNutterButter: Nah, Swagger has the last one

Cam: Swagger?

ERIC changed their name to Swagger [High]

Swagger [High]: Sup

Cam: how are you communication?

Cam: not fixing that

Swagger [High]: I am a highly functioning stoner

Swagger [High]: Pluss I didn’t take nine fucking edibles

iNutterButter: Matt is not here to make a sarcastic retort, please a message after the beep

iNutterButter: BeeP

Cam: god I’m going to have to be responsible for once to get anything done

CAM changed their name to Fitz This Mess

Fitz This Mess: also, nothing is getting done on this group project

Swagger [High]: noPe

Fitz This Mess: you somehow managed to pop a p in text and I applaud you.

Fitz This Mess: Now lets change the stupid chat name

Swagger [High] renamed the chat “We’re Doing Drugs”

Fitz This Mess renamed the chat “DONT DO FUCKIG DRUGS”

Swagger [High]: I’m only keeping that since I’m too lazy and my roommate just brought me Tom the Dank Engine

iNutterButter added JAY to the chat

JAY changed their name to creamsTHICCle

creamsTHICCle: nobody tells Matt any of this.

Fitz This Mess: God this is chaos already and there’s only three of us here.