missmeinyourbones

[missmeinyourbones]

unicorns and pomegranates

summary: Suna x F!Reader. "Do you ever feel like you were born to serve and die for someone in glorious battle," Suna says, valiantly failing not to flick his eyes back to you. You're frowning at your drink, trying to pick a particle off its rim with a nail. "Sexually, I mean."

"You are not normal," Atsumu tells him.

word count: 1.4k

cw: angst to fluff, friends to lovers, mild objectification, suna has strange inclinations, intoxication, one or two references to sex, …hand mention

a/n: i almost titled this "stop picking fights with knights and come wear tunics with the eunuchs"

You can't believe you were actually looking forward to this team dinner. It's the stupid fancy gala EJP Raijin puts on annually, in a stupid beautiful venue covered in white marble and stupid crystal chandeliers. You'd been so excited when Suna said, offhandedly, I get a plus-one, you wanna come with?

You should've known it would end up like this, feeling self-conscious in your expensive clothes while Suna stands far away and doesn't pay attention to you at all. He's not your date, you're his plus-one, gifted a glimpse into the world of professional athletes for one night only. He expects you to mingle with his friends, maybe even get yourself a real date to the next team event. It's such a stupid, cruel joke of the stars that he's the only one of these talented, handsome men that you want.

You take a sip of champagne and try not to think about it. He'd come to pick you up in his ridiculous fancy red car and stared at you with his inscrutable features and said I don't know, I'm sure it's fine, when you asked what he thought. Glowing praise, you thought, sitting among models and Olympians.

Across the room, Suna is trying to pretend that he is a eunuch. Eunuchs don't throw their best friends over their shoulder and carry them home and make sweet, sweet love to them all night long.

"There's something wrong with your face," Atsumu says.

"Do you ever feel like you were born to serve and die for someone in glorious battle," Suna says, valiantly failing not to flick his eyes back to you. You're frowning at your drink, trying to pick a particle off its rim with a nail. "Sexually, I mean."

"You are not normal," Atsumu tells him, "but yeah, I get the feeling."

They lapse into silence for a moment. One of the guys who came stag walks up to you and jumps into conversation. Suna imagines spiking a ball into his face several times.

"Are you feeling like that because of—" Atsumu starts, but Suna cuts him off with a violent slashing motion across the throat.

"If you say the words out loud, they become true," Suna says. "Shut your fat mouth."

"She does look good," Atsumu muses. "Nice necklace."

"Don't look at her," Suna says. "I actually don't even know who you're talking about. She's wearing a necklace?"

He glances back. You aren't, which soothes his concern that he'd been so distracted by the generous amount of décolletage revealed by your top he'd missed major details of your appearance, which he planned to burn into his memory and then never speak about until he died. His last words were probably going to be "the top button was undone."

"Maybe you would be failing less miserably if you actually talked to your date," Atsumu says. "How did you ask her to be your date without actually dating her?"

"It takes a lot of skill to put yourself this deeply in the friendzone," Suna says. "Someday you'll understand."

"I hope not," Atsumu says with feeling. "Hey, look, they're doing shots."

The rando who’s talking to you is clinking his glass against yours, making unnecessarily intense eye contact. Suna frowns; staring at you like a weirdo is his job. You glance away from your drinking partner for a second, your gazes connecting, and that’s all the invitation Suna needs to cross the room in the space of a split second. He snatches your shot from you with two long fingers and tosses it back, grinning widely at the other man when he’s swallowed.

“That was mine,” you say without vitriol.

“That was vodka,” he says, feeling the warm buzz of it in his belly. “You’re allergic.”

“Not allergic,” you roll your eyes, “just a lightweight.”

It’s true. Vodka gets you way too drunk, way too fast. Why hadn’t you said anything to this other guy? You only ever drink such hard liquor when you’re upset.

Are you upset?

“I’ll buy you another drink,” he promises. He’s glad he took the drink from you. It’s having a strange, dizzying effect the longer he looks at you, your darkened eyes, your parted lips. He reaches up and sweeps the back of his hand just over the curve of your neck, a light touch. He’s pleased when it leaves goosebumps in its wake, a short-lived mark he can leave on you.

“It’s an open bar, dummy,” you roll your eyes. The guy you were talking to has faded into the distance, though you don’t even notice.

He’d meant to stay away from you tonight. He’d meant to be a respectful friend, one who didn’t steal glances at you that he shouldn’t, one who didn’t want to punch out anyone else who looked at you with lust on their face. Every time he steps away, though, you seem to be tossing back another drink, giggling and leaning on a new shoulder, and he’s back at your side, plucking your hand away and glaring at whoever tries to talk to you.

Finally, he follows you down the hall to the bathroom, where you spin and lean heavy on the wall, facing him. Your eyes are bright and teary, all the gloss rubbed off your downturned lips, but he still wants to kiss them, for some reason (because he’s a creep, he scolds himself).

“What are you doing,” you sigh, and he blinks, taken aback.

“Just watching out for you, I guess,” he says. You pout.

“You don’t even care,” you say, voice catching. “You’re hovering like a jealous boyfriend and I don’t even know why.”

“I’m not,” he protests lamely.

“I know!” You explode, pushing away from the wall and wobbling dangerously. He clamps a hand down on your arm and supports your body with his; you are a bamboo shoot and he’s the stake. “I know. You think I’m ugly, you’ll never like me. I get it.”

“What?” Your skin is warm to the touch, and you smell a touch sweet, a touch spicy. He wants to lick the skin behind your ears, where your perfume is spritzed strongest. You couldn’t be more wrong if you declared that Atsumu was going to win a prize for scientific achievement.

“This is stupid,” you say, and oh, oh, no, there are tears welling up and streaking down your face. He pulls you in firmly, playing with the short hairs on the back of your neck. You cry into his chest, even though he’s the reason. “I want to go home. I just wanted to have fun.”

“I know,” he says, voice low, like he’s talking to a wounded animal, “I’ll take you home.” For some reason this encourages a fresh bout of sobbing. “I’m sorry I ruined your night.”

“I just wanted you to think I was pretty,” you hiccup on the last word, and his heart stops.

“I think you’re so pretty,” Suna says. “I think you’re gorgeous. You don’t think you’re pretty?”

“I know I’m pretty,” you say, and he keeps trying to step back, walk away, pull himself out of a situation he has to be misunderstanding. “I thought you did, too, enough to invite me to this stupid thing, enough that I was so excited to pretend we were together or maybe that we would be together for real someday. Fuck, I’m an idiot.”

“You’re not,” he begs you to believe him.

“I thought just because you’re beautiful and you look at me—sometimes—like you want me or something and you touch me all the time, it might mean something. I am an idiot. And a bad friend. I even like your hands, Suna, you’ve made me so crazy I can’t even look at your hands without thinking about your fingers—”

Suna grabs you before you can finish a sentence that will surely land you pressed up against the wall with one of the hands in question in your pants. He says your name, serious, voice grating against all his instincts.

“You don’t know what you’re saying.”

“I do,” you insist, looking like you’re going to start crying again. “I—fuck. I love you, Rintarō.”

It’s the final nail in the coffin.

“I’m going to enter noble and valorous combat to prove my worthiness,” he says instantaneously. You peer up at him, expression simultaneously baffled and cutting.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Suna says hurriedly. “Let’s go home. You should lie down, and tomorrow I need to clear some things up, repeatedly. Possibly for the rest of our lives.”

[missmeinyourbones]

wishing all of my friends on here a lovely holiday season regardless of what your celebrations look like! holidays are hard and weird and no matter what you’re spending your time doing over here next few days / weeks, i love you and i am thinking of you

[missmeinyourbones]

if we make it through december

cw: mentions of holiday celebrations, family & childhood trauma, suna is a bit thick in the head but he's trying, i love u all and am giving u a very big hug this holiday season

The floors of your apartment creak beneath light footsteps when you tiptoe into the kitchen to click the heat on.

You keep forgetting that it's December now and that your heat should be switched to automatic rather than the manual setting it's still set to. Mornings like this where your nose is a bit raw from a dry sleep and you hiss at the cold floor skimming your bare feet remind you that the year has indeed passed.

In the almost year that the two of you have been together, you've learned that Rintaro sleeps both cold and like a damn log. Crawling from his dead-weight grasp early this morning was no challenge, and while your teeth are nearly chattering, you know he's more than comfortable beneath the sheets of your bed.

While you wait for the radiator to squeal and signal that it's doing its job, you fall into the usual routine of filling your kettle and preparing a cup of tea. You don't expect your lover to be up for a while, so you plan to preoccupy (and warm) yourself for a bit before he finally stumbles down the hall.

Water quickly boils and ceramic clanks together in the cabinet. And before you know it, you're silently admiring a freshly brewed cup of tea and adding your usual like of milk to it.

While lost in a spoonwork of swirling colors, you abruptly feel two cold hands inching beneath your sleep shirt. Instinctually, you hiss at the unwelcoming feeling as palms flatten and rub themselves against your goosebump-covered skin.

Into the back of your head, you hear Rintaro chuckle at your dramatics. He pulls you closer and kneels a bit so his chin can comfortably rest in the dent of your shoulder. You loosen a bit as he places a gentle kiss on your temple.

He clears his raspy throat, "Sorry, baby."

Rintaro laughs again when he feels you sigh but relax into his nippy touch. Loosening his hold on you, he allows you to shimmy around and face him - puffy morning eyes and all.

Between his steady arms and the kitchen counter, you raise your mug to his chapped lips. He gently blows on the top before taking a small taste, humming his thanks and approval at the warm sweetness on his tongue.

Your morning is enjoyed through shared sips and quiet words, and it feels like it's always supposed to be like this. It's warm and inviting, like a home you never really had unless you were asleep and yearning for it.

With a chilled nose and slightly burnt tongue, you're grateful.

"I've been meaning to ask you," Rintaro takes one more sip and swallows before letting you cradle it between your hands. "What're your plans for the holidays?"

You feel something crack inside of you. It's a tough thing to explain, but your heart sinks at his innocent question.

Not yet having spent a holiday together, you weren't naive to the fact that this conversation was inevitable. You'd expected it eventually, maybe not so soon; but again, the feeling of your apartment's heat finally kicking in reminds you that it is December and soon isn't really soon at all.

Trying too hard to be casual, you shrug and take a drink of your own, "Uh, nothing really."

You watch the corners of his mouth twitch with amusement. "Nothing?" he dryly chuckles.

Biting the inside of your cheek and praying to whoever is listening for him to just drop it, you choose to shrug once more.

He crinkles his nose with faux mocking,

"Nothing like 'boring family holiday party' nothing? Or 'stupid traditions you need to play along with, just to say you did' nothing?"

Feigning casualty and doing your best to look at anything that's not his eyes, you shake your head.

"Nah, I was just gonna stay here. Maybe make those cheap sugar cookies I like but," you gesture to the painfully silent apartment around you and preoccupy your mouth against the rim of your cup before weakly finishing, "...yeah."

You can see the gears quickly turning in Rintaro's head as he scans your face for any sign of humor; when he doesn't find one, he realizes that you're serious.

"Oh—I guess I just figured you'd be flying back to see your parents."

"No, I—” you wince at your own voice as you stutter on an explanation before pathetically deciding on, "—don't do that."

Quizzically, Rintaro's head turns to the side in thought. He backs up a bit, and you internally frown at the loss of warmth when he leans against the opposite counter to take a good look at you.

"What do you mean, you don't do that?"

He asks and there's no sourness in his voice. He's just asking—just wants to know and understand you as best as he can. And it kind of makes you nauseous with a feeling you instantly want to rid of.

You rub your sock-covered feet together in anxiousness, "We don't really talk."

"I mean, I don't talk to most of my family either, but I still go home for the holidays and show my face, do that weird small talk thing with them."

At any other moment, you'd laugh at his casual bluntness, but you don't have it in you when you know you aren't really on the same page.

With a weak smile, you shake your head and attempt to wrap up the situation once more. "It's no big deal. I'm all set."

Quick both on and off the court, he doesn't falter when he presses. "Well, when was the last time you saw them?"

You awkwardly laugh and do that thing you do, where your nose crinkles in hesitancy, knowing that he won't like your answer. Because even if Rintaro doesn't know everything about you, he does know a hell of a lot; and he'll be damned if he doesn't keep on learning more.

"Are you telling me that your family hasn't seen you in years?" he breathes in disbelief, unable to wrap his head around not spending time with his own parents and sister.

Feeling your patience wearing a bit thin at his innocent prodding of your insecurity, you sigh.

"It's just how things are with us."

Silence overtakes the small space of kitchen between the two of you. Rintaro stares at you, not with a judgemental gaze like everyone else who eventually finds this information out about you, but with a bittersweet one, as if he's trying to sort through and rotate your fragile puzzle pieces before being confident enough to insert them into place.

His voice comes in a soft whisper after a few moments, "You're really not going?"

"I… wasn't invited," you mimic his pitch without meeting his eyes.

"You… weren't invited home?"

"It's not really a home," you mumble, eyes stuck to the ground when you reassure him, "like I said, it's just complicated. I'm good, Rin."

Another gentle staring contest ensues, one with no words being said but a whole lot of unsaid thoughts ebbing and flowing between the two of you.

Just as you begin to crumble beneath his heavy gaze, Rintaro sighs and closes the gap between the two of you again. His hands carefully find your sides like they always do, but this time with a bit more caution. He's careful when he easily lifts you onto the counter, trying to make it a bit easier for him to hold your gaze.

You feel like a child again, guilt rotting in the pit of your stomach as your eyes are glued to your feet swinging against the lower cabinets of your kitchen. You wonder if the floorboards can swallow you up, take you back to that place of stable loneliness.

"You know you can tell me these things, right?" he softly kisses into your hairline. "You don't have to, but you can."

You nod against his movements, not really wanting to explain but knowing you should. It's Rintaro, you know he'll understand, but a small part of you can't help but still errs on the side of caution.

"It's for the better, really."

Your words are muffled against his chest. You feel hum nod slowly, letting you take your time while silently encouraging you to continue if you'd like.

And you do.

"Just didn't have a great childhood. Lots of dealing with my parents' mistakes and helping out with my siblings because of it."

Tender fingers skim the soft angle of your jaw when Rintaro hums, "That was really brave of you."

You feel that wall building itself up again, but you can't stop it, don't know how to. "It was fine," you shrug off his kindness, deflecting it how you know to.

And the small, sane part of you sighs in relief because Rintaro notices. He can't help but notice.

He presses against your skin, "It wasn't. Kids aren't supposed to raise kids."

He's right, you know he is. You wish you could just say that, but all that comes out of your mouth is a detached, "Well, it's over now."

"It is," he gently agrees with your words, taking a thumb to your bottom lip and tilting your head upwards, "and I'm proud of you. You did good, baby."

You're little again, and there's suddenly no room for the praise to fit inside of you. Your body rejects it, forces it to well up in your eyes and trickle down your cheeks in a feeble attempt to rid of the uneasy feeling in your throat.

And you're crying. Wetly and awkwardly laughing, you quickly flick the tears from your cheeks as you shy away from the intimacy. "Ew, sorry. Thanks."

Rintaro sadly smiles at you--always sorry for nothing, and now he's beginning to understand why.

"C'mere," he cradles the back of your head again and lets you breathe in the scent of his hoodie.

"Sorry—"

"Stop apologizing," he firmly kisses your forehead, hoping for it to seep beneath your skin and stick itself inside of you.

He feels your smaller frame shake against him, and he's instantly relieved to know it's out of a weak laugh rather than a sob. You murmur, "I just—I'm sure you know by now that I—can't really handle nice things."

"Hey," his now warm hand rubs circles on your back, "you deserve nice things, y'know?"

No longer letting you shy away from his words, he uses his free hand to lift your jaw upwards again. Met with your teary eyes and sniffing nose, he peppers kisses against your skin with care.

"And if you'd stop being so stubborn all the time, maybe I could give you nice things more often, yeah?"

His heart flutters when you roll your eyes at his words, and he can't bite back the smile that crawls across his face at your usual attitude.

As he caresses your damp cheek with slender fingers, you speak into the side of his palm. "You give me enough nice things."

Rintaro smiles but shakes his head, "Really, I don't."

Another big shaky breath rocks your frame, and Rintaro melts at your bravery when you tell him, "No one's ever really cared for me the way you do, and I guess it freaks me out sometimes." You catch yourself almost apologizing for it, but bite your tongue; and as if he too notices it, he smiles with pride.

"We can work on it," he promises, hand heavy on your back, "I'm not goin' anywhere."

He holds you for as long as you'll let him, and in a tangle of limbs and soft kisses, you sway in one another's warmth. It's just the two of you, in your tiny kitchen apartment with shitty heating, when he says--

"So, what are our holiday plans?"

"Our?" You shoot him a weak warning glare. "I said I'm staying here. You should go home though, it'll be nice to see your sister."

"We will be going home, yeah. Mom's been annoying me about meeting in person you, anyways."

Your eyes find his and that unsettling feeling fills your heart once more, but this time, it seeps further than your throat. It's in the tips of your fingers and works its way down to your sock-clad toes. It's in your lungs, entering with every inhale and doubling with each exhale.

It's everywhere—and even though it's terrifying, you sit with it. Because it's yours.

He gently brushes some stray hairs behind your ear and sighs, "And if I'm gonna sit through a painful holiday dinner, think I'm gonna need you there to hold my hand."

[missmeinyourbones]

lucky for you guys i haven’t known how to read since bnha 390

[missmeinyourbones]

i know in my core that touya is annoying. i feel it in my bones. he flicks your forehead when you’re mid sentence and when you look at him dumbfounded he continues to deadpan back at you or ask a question about what you were saying. he pokes your side every time he passes you in the house. he sits next to you on the couch with an arm around you and he taps your shoulder farthest from him, then looks away like he didn’t do it. he puts his feet up on the coffee table and refuses to put them down when you try to get by. he puts the empty milk container back in the fridge. he puts dirty clothes on the floor right next to the empty hamper. he pees with the door open and leaves the toilet seat up. he’s annoying. the sky is blue grass is green and touya is annoying

[missmeinyourbones]

leahhhh i love and miss you with all my heart 💗 i hope you’ve been doing okay 🙁 ily ily ily

HI MY PRECIOUS EJ

ilove u so dearly and appreciate your kind words always. miss u with all my heart and am sending you the worlds best hug

[missmeinyourbones]

leah i miss u i love u i hope ur doing well 💗

my soph!!! i love u forever and a day

[missmeinyourbones]

Are you gonna continue "Everything Stays" Touya x Reader so we can tell him that we like the stupid shirt, it's just probably too small on him 🥺

I really adore the domestic Rei got dafuq out series. Gotta go to the dentist because it's so sweet and I keep rereading it. 😭

this is so sweet thank you

im not sure if ill ever be able to expand on that little universe in a way i feel proud enough to share, but know that i think about them all the time and that wherever they are, they are loved well

(and touya’s shirt is most definitely too small on him, the last time he wore it was to a high school dance that he left halfway through to get high behind a 7/11)

[missmeinyourbones]

dabi becomes a father and is scared shitless that he’s gonna have a child that’s just like him i.e. hard to love and then he does end up having a daughter as emotional as he used to be but also she’s so so easy to love actually

[missmeinyourbones]

if anybody here supports or voted for trump get off my blog and unfollow me

[missmeinyourbones]

hi friends

as some random bitch on the internet im not gonna sit here and speak just to say i did but if you are scared and hurt and upset by the election results, i know and i love you. it isn’t right and it isn’t fair and im so sorry a country that was meant to support you made you feel like you were unloved. i love you and i stand with you and i am always a safe space to take you as you are. im sorry others won’t do the same for you. please take care of yourselves and one another <3

[missmeinyourbones]

to any of my beautiful american friends - please please please if you are able to do so, go out and utilize your right to vote today! it’s a very scary time right now and my heart is with anyone feeling the stress of it all. im with you always and am sending you my love 💙💙💙

[missmeinyourbones]

leah!! i miss you!! how are you!! it’s been such a while since i last dropped by here 🥺 i hope life has been treating you kindly over the past month 🥺

i come with a curious sel question!! 😌 something spooky season related!!! what treat is your fave singling out from your trick-or-treat loot?? what are you singling out? is it the chocolates? the candies? other treats?? 🍫🍬🎃

SEL my dearest…. you continue to be the sweetest angel to grace this earth and please know that while i haven’t answered any over the last few months, your asks always truly make my day

only thing coming to mind right now is that touya is a BITCH. claims he hates halloween but gets grumpy when i don’t have a horror movie queued up for us on the weekends. gets mad that i spend too much money on candy for trick or treaters but awkwardly stands in the hallway every time i open the door and gush over a baby dressed in a onesie. claims he doesn’t like candy and the options i got are lame but he is a SUCKER for chocolate and is sneaking hersheys every time he walks by the bowl. LOSERRERRRRRRRRR

[missmeinyourbones]

OMG i loved aurora borealis green so much!!! megumi and yuuji’s dynamic was the best, i love how you showed their friendship <3 and why did ur description of megumi make my tummy TURN omg he’s so handsome 💕 also i have a crush on yuuji from this fic now, he can call dibs on me any day 💞💞💞💞💞

AHHHH thank you! they are best friends who love and can’t stand eachother simultaneously. and as far as megumi goes he is just handsome in general that’s not my doing sadly i cannot take credit

[missmeinyourbones]

touya + eggplant ; 3.2k ੈ‧₊˚ for our meet fruit collab ! ‧₊˚✧ ₊˚

touya's message comes across in the early afternoon, when you know he should be working.

the image that comes to mind is — hilariously sweet: him in ill-fitting trousers and freshly combed hair, leaning too far into some desk as he fiddles with his phone. biting his lip, most likely, running the very tip of his tongue across the hole his piercing left behind; amused.

it'd be even better, you think, if he wasn't sending you three eggplant emojis and nothing else.

it's bold, and startlingly so. enough that your heart rate skyrockets and sweat forms instantly on the back of your neck, in the creases of your palms, as you overanalyze three cartoon vegetables harder than you ever have in your life. you could easily believe he's sending this as a drunken joke, but he's been stone-cold sober since he was released, and if that had changed, even in the slightest, yumi would have told you.

you type out four different variations of the same question — asking what the hell that's supposed to mean — before sending none of them. are you...being a weirdo? eggplant emojis are inherently sexual, right? and maybe touya's been away for a while, but surely he would know that. right? in a single, wordless text, he's managed to make you sixteen again; too young to be crushing on your best friend's older brother.

— though you think of him now as he was only days ago: eyes clear and focused, razor sharp and set on you from across the todoroki living room. the very memory makes your stomach churn, violently; just a kid that should be worrying about their studies, and not about a boy that wouldn't give you the time of day.

before your thoughts can get themselves any more scrambled, another text follows suit:

yumi wants to know if u wanna come for dinner

eggplant, you tell yourself, as in the actual food that people eat. the actual vegetable, and not the dickish inquiry you thought it was. you do your best to ignore the little wave of disappointment that washes over you, and then the following crash once you realize that you wouldn't actually mind if he was asking after what you thought he was asking after; you, carnally.

you collect yourself enough to send him a normal, not weird text in response confirming that you'll be there, and his thumbs up comes across almost instantly. as if he'd been waiting for you.

touya was always in and out of their house when you and fuyumi were in school, but you caught him every now and then when things were good. safe at home, doing his best to hold down a job and stay out of trouble, soaking up a warmth from his family he never got as a kid, when their dad was around. how couldn't you have developed such a crush on him? to see him happy and whole, more dangerous than anyone expected, mysterious in a way that excited your teen heart — and kissing up to his mother at the dinner table?

you're not delusional enough to think he ever noticed you or your big goo-goo eyes, but sometimes he would stick his head into his sister's room, to grin and wiggle his eyebrows at you, before getting pelted in the head with a stuffed animal and chased away. it earned a high-pitched laugh from him, more of a game than anything sincere, but you still thought of him while staring at the ceiling in your own bedroom, wishing.

in all the time he was away — in rehab or jail or who-knows-where — you thought you'd outgrown your juvenile infatuation, but — here you are, still, with fevered cheeks at the very thought of him.

here you are, still, taking care to choose your clothes for dinner, as if it were only going to be you and him. fussing with your hair for far too long, as if he would notice. making little crescents with your nails into your palm outside the door to the todoroki house, as if you haven't been here thousands of times.

you've seen him since he's been home, of course, in the last few months, but there's been this weird aura surrounding you both, worse than it was when you were younger. you're tip-toeing around each other and you both know you're tip-toeing, and he's always wearing his little smug smile and looking too long. it's hard to be around him, really. a little easier to text, but every winky face he sends only winds you up even further.

when the front door swings open, you hold your breath unintentionally, neck straining until you realize —

it's only shouto.

"hi!" you say, trying not to sound as winded as you feel, though shouto — as usual — is unimpressed.

he blinks at you, two-toned, and almost rolls his eyes like the rotten teenager he's capable of being, attitude too much like touya's. there's a little doughy dumpling in his hand and he turns away from you while using it to wave further into the house. "she's in the kitchen."

fuyumi, even though you didn't ask. you follow him in and stick your tongue out at the back of his head, before going off to find your best friend — who is, indeed, in the kitchen, surrounded by bowls and utensils and too many real, actual eggplants.

"what did you do?" you ask upon seeing her treasure trove of purple veggies on the counter. "rob a farmer?"

there's really an absurd amount of them, though she doesn't look up from cutting one into little rangiri pieces. "no, actually, they were on sale at the farmer's market!"

you eye one closest to you before poking at it, oblong in shape and — kind of ugly. it feels odd in your hand when you pick it up, but that's probably because you're hyper-aware of every sound in the background of the house, of the burning embarrassment tucked away in your pocket in the form of touya's three emojis. shamefully, your thoughts take a dark turn, and when fuyumi finally glances up, you toss the vegetable back onto the counter too fast.

she snorts and shakes her head, pushing up her glasses with the back of her hand before pointing at the little steamer basket of dumplings near the stove. "try one! before shouto and natsuo eat them all."

you consider it for a moment before weighing just how much eggplant it seems you're going to consume tonight, and decide to wait until after dinner, if they're still there. along with her veggies, she's got a little tub of red miso out and also some pork frying in a pan, as well as too many bowls in the sink already. though you admire her passion for cooking, you know she'll wait to clean until everything is plated, and no one else will help her, so you take to starting on the dishes instead.

the frown she sends you can be felt, but you've been in this kitchen long enough that you think she should just give it up.

there's such comfort to being in here, with her, maybe because you really have done it so many times by now; the water is warm as it runs over your hands, sending little goosebumps up your arms, and you nod your head absentmindedly to the sound of her knife against the cutting board. you absorb the heat from everywhere quickly, and when you begin to smell the garlic and ginger cooking, you feel like a warm, doughy little dumping yourself.

you get lost in it with her and all the tension from the day melts, dissolves completely when you can lightly hear fuyumi humming over her sizzling pan. she tells you about some other things she bought at the market, gossip about a mutual friend you both have, she asks about the shirt you're wearing and why she's never seen it before, and you're rinsing your hands of dish soap when you hear her squeal—

"ah! get out!"

when you peek over your shoulder, you can see touya there, leaning too far over her own, smiling with full cheeks as he investigates what she's cooking. half of a little dumpling is in his hand and he looks down at it, makes a face before turning it over, and then he places it right back in the steamer.

"ew, gross!" fuyumi nudges him away with her elbow before plucking it right back out, trying to hand it back off to him. "nobody wants your half-eaten food."

and then, much to your horror, right in front of his sister — touya's eyes cut across the kitchen to you. one corner of his mouth quirks up in his little smirk and then you're whipping back around to look down in the sink, despite it being empty. his stare can be felt, too. you wonder if it's a todoroki thing.

"ew," fuyumi mumbles. you feel like you've been caught in some kind of way, though you don't doubt she clocked your affections for her older brother the minute they developed.

it's not something she's ever spoken directly to you about, however, which you're grateful for. you don't know how you would be able to handle that discussion, but she's always made sure to pass off the odd and unprompted little updates about touya over the years.

when he speaks again, it's clear his mouth is full. "shouto said he's not settin' the table."

"okay, then you go do it."

"no," touya snorts, "he's the youngest, that ain't fair."

"and you're the oldest, so you can ask him to do it."

"he doesn't listen to me and you know—"

"alright!" fuyumi sighs, and when you peek back at them, she's shoving her knife into his hands and shaking her head to herself, before stalking out of the kitchen.

you unravel out of your little dumpling warmth immediately, though your goosebumps return in full force. touya grins at you, happily, and tosses the kitchen knife in his hands in a way that looks too proficient, too dangerous for what it is. your teen heart thumps loudly in your ears, charmed and enamored by his tragic mystery.

— and then you take in his still-pristine work outfit, openly, now that he's watching you; slacks a little slouchy on his narrow hips, white shirt buttoned up to his neck. the tattoo there is covered up by bandages on purpose, and though he means to simply hide them from view, it only sharpens all his edges.

the small pink, hello-kitty band-aid on his cheek helps, too, in a cutesy way. makes you all too aware of how much has changed over the years. how much he's changed, all the work he's had to do, the dues he's had to pay. your heart swell stubbornly, seriously, and you try to shake it away.

your voice starts out small, embarrassingly enough. "you look nice in your fancy office clothes."

touya's hand slip into his pocket and he rocks back and forth on his heels once, pleased, before looking down at his loose tie. "think so? you like a white-collar man?"

you look back to the sink, shy. it pulls him in; a moth to the flame of your hesitance, and it's not a moment later that he's leaning up against the counter beside you, watching your heated face carefully. the knife at his side gleams in the kitchen light and — you're not afraid of him, couldn't be, but you wonder if anyone else has ever been.

the truth of what landed him in trouble with the law is unknown to you, the one thing fuyumi never shared, and you can't help but to be curious as to why. you're practically family at this point and it's not as if you could ever look down on them, ever, and while you couldn't possibly understand the horror they went through with their father — you can sympathize with the fact that it wasn't easy. that he left scars they'll always nurse.

touya's always been so out of your reach, despite being just down the hall. blame it on time or the slight age difference or your relationship with his sister; it's hard to hope that he could be here, at your side, truly. finally.

instead of answering, you simply turn so that you're facing him, hip leaned against the counter, and the bright eyes he has on your cheeks are almost impossible to be at the mercy of. even worse when his smile grows, boyish-ly cute.

"what, coming on too strong?" he asks, laughing quietly when you put on a brave face and roll your eyes. "figured the emojis would'a opened the door a little."

your cheeks flame, and you press your hands into them to tide back your smile at how — flirty he is. the step back you take doesn't go unnoticed. "i couldn't even believe what i was seeing when you sent those."

"oh, yeah?" the tone of his voice changes then, shifts a bit lower. if you weren't tracking his eyes as they shift down to your mouth, burning a little brighter, you might've though you'd upset him or said the wrong thing. "what'd you think i meant?"

you glance away from him, directly at the ugly eggplant you'd been fiddling with earlier, and the dark thoughts return. when you don't answer right away, he reaches over to flip on the tap, running the knife blade underneath the stream as you map the wide expanse of his hands, the length of his fingers. small, translucent scars litter his knuckles.

"i don't know," you lie, and then it seems like you have said the wrong thing, this time; touya turns a little, placing all his attention in the dish soap and the sponge you'd left out to dry.

you are sixteen, speechless, nervous by his proximity—

"you seein' anyone right now?"

—but this is not the same boy that left you behind.

you have to laugh in order to keep yourself rooted to your spot, here on earth in the todoroki kitchen, and it brings his attention right back to you. "uh," you say, lamely, "what?"

it makes him laugh, too, all your sputtering. "yeah, c'mon. i mean, i know i'm fucked in the head, but," and then he really laughs, open-mouthed, showing off the piercing still in his tongue. "i'm workin' on it, and stuff. renewed and reformed, or whatever."

"hang on," you shake your head quickly, frowning at him as you replay the words over and over; his self-deprecation is so genuine that you almost missed it. "i don't think you're...fucked in the head."

"well, that makes one of us—"

"no, touya, i'm serious," the step closer you take has him looking away, down into the empty sink; hilariously, a mirror of yourself that you never could have imagined seeing. it does strange things to your heart, your stomach, and your nerves. makes you bolder than you really are. "i've never thought that."

he doesn't say anything for long time, choosing to watch droplets of water as they fall from the faucet. his jaw works in the silence, like he's chewing the inside skin of his cheek, like he's thinking too hard.

and then he says, quietly, "i know." he continues without looking at you, sensing the confusion on your face. "i know you never did, 's'why i couldn't..."

you blink, lost suddenly in the meaning of his words and their whirlwind. you think back to all the times he grinned at you from fuyumi's doorway, how uninterested he seemed in you from across the dinner table, his silence on the rare occasions you were alone together.

you've known touya since you were fourteen and he was fifteen. you remember when their parent's got divorced and when touya got his license and when he got locked up, the first time. you've known him through so many of his bad moments and it never dimmed the little stars you had in your eyes for him, and you once thought that was a bad thing, that it would only lead to heartbreak time and time again from him. you once thought it was something only you and fuyumi knew about.

"i am tryin' now," he continues with a sigh, a little winded. "seriously. got this shitty job and am goin' to my meetings. not as big of a piece of shit." when you start to object, he shakes his head and holds up a hand to stop you from arguing. "i know, i just mean...you wanna white-collar guy, i'm a white-collar guy."

you feel shy again, especially as the high points of his cheek flush pink. boyish-ly cute. "so that's why you sent me three eggplant emojis instead of just asking me to come eat dinner?"

touya snorts. "yeah, like i said, i'm workin' on it."

"no, i..." it feels wrong to admit anything to him like this, so close as his grin grows on his handsome face, dimples showing. you've been thinking about moments like this for years, but now that it's here, you feel a little dizzy, looking into his bright eyes. "i like the eggplant emoji." you step away from him for just a moment, to grab his half-eaten dumpling, and his expression grows serious — a little dark — as you nibble on it. "i like the way you...do things."

his smile grows knife-sharp, something he's too good at wielding. "well, in that case—"

"can i come in yet? our dinner is about to burn."

you both whip around to take in fuyumi, hovering at the edges of the kitchen with her arms crossed. watching on, her cheeks tinged pink, too. you try to step away, embarrassed and caught, but touya only leans in, knocking his hip to yours.

fuyumi rolls her eyes at him, but the small smile she sends you has you wanting to be swallowed up by the floor; this isn't a discussion you've ever had to have with her, but now — it's inevitable.

you suppose you can't complain too much.

"okay, you had your moment, now get out," she sticks her tongue out at touya before shooing him away, making a small noise when he pinches your elbow teasingly. it makes him laugh when she swats at him, and he only holds up his hands and tries to drop all his weight back on her as she steers him out of the kitchen.

you fish the knife out of the sink and return to cutting another eggplant once she's back and stirring in her leeks and little miso mixture. the moment is tense between you to begin with — but then she's humming quietly under her breath and knocking her hip into yours, too, tucking you back into the comfort of this house you've always been in. this family you've always loved.

"you know," she murmurs eventually, rolling her eyes with another smile when you glance up at her face. one of the eggplants is weighed in her hands, and even she frowns down at it, before shaking it at you in a way that makes you both laugh. "he made me buy these, by the way."

—tucking you back into the comfort of this family that has, maybe, always loved you, too.

[missmeinyourbones]

if we make it through december

cw: mentions of holiday celebrations, family & childhood trauma, suna is a bit thick in the head but he's trying, i love u all and am giving u a very big hug this holiday season

The floors of your apartment creak beneath light footsteps when you tiptoe into the kitchen to click the heat on.

You keep forgetting that it's December now and that your heat should be switched to automatic rather than the manual setting it's still set to. Mornings like this where your nose is a bit raw from a dry sleep and you hiss at the cold floor skimming your bare feet remind you that the year has indeed passed.

In the almost year that the two of you have been together, you've learned that Rintaro sleeps both cold and like a damn log. Crawling from his dead-weight grasp early this morning was no challenge, and while your teeth are nearly chattering, you know he's more than comfortable beneath the sheets of your bed.

While you wait for the radiator to squeal and signal that it's doing its job, you fall into the usual routine of filling your kettle and preparing a cup of tea. You don't expect your lover to be up for a while, so you plan to preoccupy (and warm) yourself for a bit before he finally stumbles down the hall.

Water quickly boils and ceramic clanks together in the cabinet. And before you know it, you're silently admiring a freshly brewed cup of tea and adding your usual like of milk to it.

While lost in a spoonwork of swirling colors, you abruptly feel two cold hands inching beneath your sleep shirt. Instinctually, you hiss at the unwelcoming feeling as palms flatten and rub themselves against your goosebump-covered skin.

Into the back of your head, you hear Rintaro chuckle at your dramatics. He pulls you closer and kneels a bit so his chin can comfortably rest in the dent of your shoulder. You loosen a bit as he places a gentle kiss on your temple.

He clears his raspy throat, "Sorry, baby."

Rintaro laughs again when he feels you sigh but relax into his nippy touch. Loosening his hold on you, he allows you to shimmy around and face him - puffy morning eyes and all.

Between his steady arms and the kitchen counter, you raise your mug to his chapped lips. He gently blows on the top before taking a small taste, humming his thanks and approval at the warm sweetness on his tongue.

Your morning is enjoyed through shared sips and quiet words, and it feels like it's always supposed to be like this. It's warm and inviting, like a home you never really had unless you were asleep and yearning for it.

With a chilled nose and slightly burnt tongue, you're grateful.

"I've been meaning to ask you," Rintaro takes one more sip and swallows before letting you cradle it between your hands. "What're your plans for the holidays?"

You feel something crack inside of you. It's a tough thing to explain, but your heart sinks at his innocent question.

Not yet having spent a holiday together, you weren't naive to the fact that this conversation was inevitable. You'd expected it eventually, maybe not so soon; but again, the feeling of your apartment's heat finally kicking in reminds you that it is December and soon isn't really soon at all.

Trying too hard to be casual, you shrug and take a drink of your own, "Uh, nothing really."

You watch the corners of his mouth twitch with amusement. "Nothing?" he dryly chuckles.

Biting the inside of your cheek and praying to whoever is listening for him to just drop it, you choose to shrug once more.

He crinkles his nose with faux mocking,

"Nothing like 'boring family holiday party' nothing? Or 'stupid traditions you need to play along with, just to say you did' nothing?"

Feigning casualty and doing your best to look at anything that's not his eyes, you shake your head.

"Nah, I was just gonna stay here. Maybe make those cheap sugar cookies I like but," you gesture to the painfully silent apartment around you and preoccupy your mouth against the rim of your cup before weakly finishing, "...yeah."

You can see the gears quickly turning in Rintaro's head as he scans your face for any sign of humor; when he doesn't find one, he realizes that you're serious.

"Oh—I guess I just figured you'd be flying back to see your parents."

"No, I—” you wince at your own voice as you stutter on an explanation before pathetically deciding on, "—don't do that."

Quizzically, Rintaro's head turns to the side in thought. He backs up a bit, and you internally frown at the loss of warmth when he leans against the opposite counter to take a good look at you.

"What do you mean, you don't do that?"

He asks and there's no sourness in his voice. He's just asking—just wants to know and understand you as best as he can. And it kind of makes you nauseous with a feeling you instantly want to rid of.

You rub your sock-covered feet together in anxiousness, "We don't really talk."

"I mean, I don't talk to most of my family either, but I still go home for the holidays and show my face, do that weird small talk thing with them."

At any other moment, you'd laugh at his casual bluntness, but you don't have it in you when you know you aren't really on the same page.

With a weak smile, you shake your head and attempt to wrap up the situation once more. "It's no big deal. I'm all set."

Quick both on and off the court, he doesn't falter when he presses. "Well, when was the last time you saw them?"

You awkwardly laugh and do that thing you do, where your nose crinkles in hesitancy, knowing that he won't like your answer. Because even if Rintaro doesn't know everything about you, he does know a hell of a lot; and he'll be damned if he doesn't keep on learning more.

"Are you telling me that your family hasn't seen you in years?" he breathes in disbelief, unable to wrap his head around not spending time with his own parents and sister.

Feeling your patience wearing a bit thin at his innocent prodding of your insecurity, you sigh.

"It's just how things are with us."

Silence overtakes the small space of kitchen between the two of you. Rintaro stares at you, not with a judgemental gaze like everyone else who eventually finds this information out about you, but with a bittersweet one, as if he's trying to sort through and rotate your fragile puzzle pieces before being confident enough to insert them into place.

His voice comes in a soft whisper after a few moments, "You're really not going?"

"I… wasn't invited," you mimic his pitch without meeting his eyes.

"You… weren't invited home?"

"It's not really a home," you mumble, eyes stuck to the ground when you reassure him, "like I said, it's just complicated. I'm good, Rin."

Another gentle staring contest ensues, one with no words being said but a whole lot of unsaid thoughts ebbing and flowing between the two of you.

Just as you begin to crumble beneath his heavy gaze, Rintaro sighs and closes the gap between the two of you again. His hands carefully find your sides like they always do, but this time with a bit more caution. He's careful when he easily lifts you onto the counter, trying to make it a bit easier for him to hold your gaze.

You feel like a child again, guilt rotting in the pit of your stomach as your eyes are glued to your feet swinging against the lower cabinets of your kitchen. You wonder if the floorboards can swallow you up, take you back to that place of stable loneliness.

"You know you can tell me these things, right?" he softly kisses into your hairline. "You don't have to, but you can."

You nod against his movements, not really wanting to explain but knowing you should. It's Rintaro, you know he'll understand, but a small part of you can't help but still errs on the side of caution.

"It's for the better, really."

Your words are muffled against his chest. You feel hum nod slowly, letting you take your time while silently encouraging you to continue if you'd like.

And you do.

"Just didn't have a great childhood. Lots of dealing with my parents' mistakes and helping out with my siblings because of it."

Tender fingers skim the soft angle of your jaw when Rintaro hums, "That was really brave of you."

You feel that wall building itself up again, but you can't stop it, don't know how to. "It was fine," you shrug off his kindness, deflecting it how you know to.

And the small, sane part of you sighs in relief because Rintaro notices. He can't help but notice.

He presses against your skin, "It wasn't. Kids aren't supposed to raise kids."

He's right, you know he is. You wish you could just say that, but all that comes out of your mouth is a detached, "Well, it's over now."

"It is," he gently agrees with your words, taking a thumb to your bottom lip and tilting your head upwards, "and I'm proud of you. You did good, baby."

You're little again, and there's suddenly no room for the praise to fit inside of you. Your body rejects it, forces it to well up in your eyes and trickle down your cheeks in a feeble attempt to rid of the uneasy feeling in your throat.

And you're crying. Wetly and awkwardly laughing, you quickly flick the tears from your cheeks as you shy away from the intimacy. "Ew, sorry. Thanks."

Rintaro sadly smiles at you--always sorry for nothing, and now he's beginning to understand why.

"C'mere," he cradles the back of your head again and lets you breathe in the scent of his hoodie.

"Sorry—"

"Stop apologizing," he firmly kisses your forehead, hoping for it to seep beneath your skin and stick itself inside of you.

He feels your smaller frame shake against him, and he's instantly relieved to know it's out of a weak laugh rather than a sob. You murmur, "I just—I'm sure you know by now that I—can't really handle nice things."

"Hey," his now warm hand rubs circles on your back, "you deserve nice things, y'know?"

No longer letting you shy away from his words, he uses his free hand to lift your jaw upwards again. Met with your teary eyes and sniffing nose, he peppers kisses against your skin with care.

"And if you'd stop being so stubborn all the time, maybe I could give you nice things more often, yeah?"

His heart flutters when you roll your eyes at his words, and he can't bite back the smile that crawls across his face at your usual attitude.

As he caresses your damp cheek with slender fingers, you speak into the side of his palm. "You give me enough nice things."

Rintaro smiles but shakes his head, "Really, I don't."

Another big shaky breath rocks your frame, and Rintaro melts at your bravery when you tell him, "No one's ever really cared for me the way you do, and I guess it freaks me out sometimes." You catch yourself almost apologizing for it, but bite your tongue; and as if he too notices it, he smiles with pride.

"We can work on it," he promises, hand heavy on your back, "I'm not goin' anywhere."

He holds you for as long as you'll let him, and in a tangle of limbs and soft kisses, you sway in one another's warmth. It's just the two of you, in your tiny kitchen apartment with shitty heating, when he says--

"So, what are our holiday plans?"

"Our?" You shoot him a weak warning glare. "I said I'm staying here. You should go home though, it'll be nice to see your sister."

"We will be going home, yeah. Mom's been annoying me about meeting in person you, anyways."

Your eyes find his and that unsettling feeling fills your heart once more, but this time, it seeps further than your throat. It's in the tips of your fingers and works its way down to your sock-clad toes. It's in your lungs, entering with every inhale and doubling with each exhale.

It's everywhere—and even though it's terrifying, you sit with it. Because it's yours.

He gently brushes some stray hairs behind your ear and sighs, "And if I'm gonna sit through a painful holiday dinner, think I'm gonna need you there to hold my hand."

[missmeinyourbones]

MIYA OSAMU

a/n: NSFW 18+ MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED FOR INTERACTING, oral (m!receiving), kinda mean and rough osamu, spit, cum eating/swallowing, face fucking and head pushing

...

your vision is a bit hazy.

osamu's words come a bit muffled, almost as if you're underwater, when he tilts your head upwards to where he towers before you.

"this is what you wanted, right? what you were begging for all night?"

your lips are spitty and drooling, and so is osamu's cock as he presses it against them. swollen and red, he watches the strings of spit weave and bow as he taps his tip against your puffy pout.

your heart skips a beat when he softly smacks his heavy tip against your cheek. "look at me, 'm talking to you," he coos condescendingly.

"yes," you gasp naturally, not even fully comprehending what he asked you.

he lets his shaft rub messily against your wet chin and lips, taking pride in how dumb he has you when he hasn't even touched you, when his cock's been in your mouth for about a minute and a half total.

he hums to himself, satisfied with the sight. "that's what i thought."

his thumb swiping your bottom lip signals for you to open your mouth and you do so pliantly. he allows the pad of his finger to press down on your tongue, the rest of his large hand gently massaging your sore jaw from taking him in a few moments ago.

"touchin' me under the table like that," he scoffs to himself, but you hear him all the same, "that's no good, huh?"

he laughs when you go to say something to defend yourself, because the way he presses down on the flat of your tongue has you gagging instead of speaking.

he keeps going, rubbing your throat and cooing in a voice that makes you shiver.

"textin' me all that nasty stuff when anyone could've looked over my shoulder and read it? not nice, baby." he tuts in dissapointment.

slowly removing his thumb from your mouth, he lets you swallow and collect yourself enough to respond.

"i'm sorry," your voice wavers pathetically, "i just wanted your--"

"i know what you wanted," he coldly interrupts, but his actions contrast his words when he carefully lines his cock up with your mouth once more, softly caressing the sides of your head.

"so don't go cryin' about it now, honey. you said it yourself," he sweetly reminds you, bucking his hips so his tip just barely slips between your lips with each thrust, "you can take it."

he lets his movements lengthen, letting his eventually cock slip completely in your warm and waiting mouth as he groans and tosses his head back. he holds your head for a few seconds before retracting his hips and smiling at your panting.

"or are you just all talk? you like to run your mouth and not keep your word?"

he watches you try to shake your head, "no, no 'samu, i can--"

"oh, i know you can," he tells you.

movements repeat themselves until he's fucking your throat, pushing your head down onto him and using you in a way you're both addicted to.

"so do it," he grits through his teeth, hissing with every thrust, "fuckin' take it."

his cock head finds the familiar home of your throat and he relishes in the way you gag and scratch at this thick thighs.

"there we go," he tenses, legs shaking a bit at the feeling of your wet tears and warm mouth on him.

your head is spinning as you barely make out his words behind hisses and grunts. "yeah? you love it, baby?"

you moan, nodding along at his words, though you're not sure if its you bobbing your head in agreement or osamu coaxing you to.

"i know ya do," he whispers from his throat. "look so pretty like this."

you feel him getting closer between the tightening of his grasp on your hair and the stuttering of his hips. you're salivating, waiting to taste the heavy load you've been craving all night, the one that got you here on your knees in the first place.

osamu senses your eagerness, tongue licking his canine as he smiles.

"gonna take it all?" he prompts your excitement, "gonna swallow what i give you?"

you're nodding and gagging and gargling all the same, and when he does cum down your throat in heavy spurts of cream--you do swallow it all, just like he told you to.

never one to stray from his nasty need to taste you, osamu is kind enough you let you breathe for a moment when he pulls out of you, but can only wait so long before he's shoving his tongue in your mouth and tasting himself on you.

"see, baby?" he praises you, big hands kneading your ass and swallowing your moans.

"all that bitching and moaning when you could've be doing something so much better with that pretty mouth, huh?"