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Guardian Sentence Starters

Change the pronouns as necessary.

“I cannot allow you to go. It wouldn’t be safe.” “I don’t just do this out of duty. I do this because I care about you.” “I don’t care what happens to you. I’m only following orders.” “You deliberately disobeyed me and put your life in danger!” “This isn’t about what you want. This about what your life means to others.” “You are never to leave my side again.” “Please trust that I have your best interests in mind.” “Of course. I will remain by your side always.” “You cannot be trusted not to do something reckless!” “Those friends of yours will be the death of you.” “Every time you do something like this, I feel myself going gray.” “I will protect you. Always.” “I won’t always be around to keep you safe.” “Of course you may attend – on the condition that I will be by your side throughout the entire affair.” “Additional security? Am I not enough?” “They’re cute, but you’re not sneaking off alone with them.” “And what if they were an assassin?!” “Behind me, NOW!” “I am not overprotective! I am the reasonable amount of protective!”

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𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐦 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐬 !

❛  what do you think you’re doing ?  ❜ ❛  you’re going to get yourself killed !  ❜ ❛  i think … i think i might be pregnant . ❜ ❛  what’s another day , right ?  ❜ ❛  i guess i’ll just clean up your mess again huh ?  ❜ ❛ why is it so hard to believe that i could love you ?  ❜ ❛  why would you ever love me ?  ❜ ❛  what are you so afraid of anyway ? ❜ ❛  no please , don’t go ! ❜ ❛  i need your help  ❜ ❛  they’re saying you killed someone …  ❜ ❛  come on , we have to leave now ! ❜ ❛  i’ve been hiding out for so long ❜ ❛  how did you find me ? ❜ ❛  please don’t cry … ❜ ❛  i’m sorry , i’m just so tired  ❜ ❛  where do we go from here ?  ❜ ❛  you’re all i’ve been looking for ❜ ❛  can you stay with me tonight ? ❜ ❛  here , do you want some wine ? ❜         ❛   will you dance with me? ❜ ❛   what if we got married right now ?  ❜ ❛  it’s not like that , i swear !   ❜ ❛   i think there’s something in the house  ❜  ❛   sometimes i feel like i can’t trust anyone  ❜                                  

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Kill Of The Night | Gin Wigmore

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My muse just fainted. Send “Hey, whoa-” to catch them!

Alternatively, send “What?” for your muse to be caught!

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Buster Keaton and his extremely tight pants in College, 1927

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*bartender slides my drink to me from across the bar and i fucking fling it back twice as hard*

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Simpsons Hit and Run but everything is broken – Call Me Kevin starters:

Feel free to change names/pronouns/titles where appropriate!

❛ oh my god , it was the same kid i knocked down earlier . he’s having a bad day . ❜ ❛ speaking of flying through the air , watch this one . ❜ ❛ goodbye , car - i’ll see ya’ later . ❜ ❛ what is wrong with his eyes ? ❜ ❛ you’re not even the one driving , buddy . it’s the random generic character ! ❜ ❛ he wasn’t even there ; that’s not my fault . ❜ ❛ what is going on here ? what is this beautiful monstrousity ? ❜ ❛ okay , that was terrifying . ❜ ❛ stop ! i’m a kid ! i’m a kid ! what are you doing ? STOP ! JESUS CHRIST - ❜ ❛ he’s insane ! he’s insane ! ❜ ❛ do you mind moving out of the way ? we’re having a conversation here . ❜ ❛ i think he’s struggling . what do i do , just wait ? it’s kinda pathetic . ❜ ❛ maybe it was that one and only villain that you have in this town that ran me down just outside here in front of your eyes and then you just did nothing . ❜ “ i mean , i’m not really racing you . i’m just getting a cab and seeing if the cab driver can get there quicker than you can . ❜ ❛ i’d tip you but i don’t want to . ❜ ❛ i mean, this is not the way physics should be , right ? i’m sure something is wrong here . ❜ ❛ i hate this mission . ❜ ❛ aw , great , now i don’t have a map this time . ❜ ❛ why is this game so cruel to me ? ❜ ❛ i’m just gonna’ hear this banjo music in my nightmares . ❜ ❛ are you serious ? now i’ve got the police and ___ after me . ❜ ❛ i never wanna’ do that again . ❜ ❛ stop looking at us like that ; we’re having a private conversation . ❜ ❛ this seems… irresponsible . ❜ ❛ this seems a bit extreme just to get ‘em to stop using their phones . ❜ ❛ how many people do i have to kill just so we can use this frickin’ robot ? ❜ ❛ i don’t think that’s how ramps work , you know . �� ❛ he’s smart enough to build that giant robot but he’s not smart enough to build some sort of signal jammer . ❜ ❛ let’s go murder these people so i can play with a robot . ❜ ❛ oh , thank god , it’s finally over . ❜ ❛ i killed all these people just to be abducted . that sucks . ❜ ❛ that doesn’t look like pleading . ❜

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headcanon prompts i guess

EATING HABITS

What is their concept of ‘healthy eating’ and, by their standards, do they eat healthily?

If not, is there a particular reason why? ie, can’t afford fresh food, don’t like vegetables, because it’s convienent?

How many meals do they eat/day? How often do they snack?

Favorite foods for various meals. Favourite desserts and snacks. Favourite drinks.

Do they drink alcohol, and if so: what type, how much, how often?

Do they drink caffeine, and if so: what type, how much, how often?

Food allergies? Do they eat food they are allergic to anyway?

Dietary restrictions? If so, are they medical, religious, or self-imposed?

If they had to eat only one food for the rest of their lives with no negative effects on their health, what would it be? (Consider taste, texture…)

If they had to give up one food for the rest of their lives, what would it be? (Not a food they already don’t eat.)

Food they would describe with the “better than sex” cliche.

Is dessert before supper ok?

As a child, did their parents make them ‘clear their plate’?

Do they have any eating disorders?

Thoughts on food touching?

Do they eat breakfast?

Do they eat standing up or do they sit?

How do they eat skittles/other small coloured candies? ie, do they sort them out first, eat them in a particular order, squish them first? One at a time or giant handfuls? 

Do they eat with their hands or use utensils?

SLEEPING HABITS

Are they a night owl or an early bird?

Do they sleep enough?

Can they fall asleep anywhere? If not, what conditions do they need to fall asleep? ie darkness, bed, ambient noise.

When in bed, do they fall asleep on their tummy or their back or their side?

Do they wake up in that same position?

Any sleep disorders? If so, how do they deal with the issue/symptoms?

How many pillows and blankets do they have?

Do they sleep with a special stuffed animal or blanket or other comfort item?

Do they talk during their sleep, or snore, or kick?

Do they sleepwalk & if so, how bad is it?

Do they dream? Are their dreams good, bad, just plain weird, or prophetic? Do they remember their dreams when they wake up? Do they keep a dream journal?

BATHROOM/HYGIENE HABITS

Do they use public restrooms freely or only when absolutely necessary?

TP: under or over?

Do they prefer baths or showers? What temperature do they like their water? How long do they take, and how much of that time is actually spent washing?

Do they sing in the shower?

How do they keep their teeth clean?

How do they pamper themselves? ie, long bubble baths etc.

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