mortimermcmirestinks
mortimermcmirestinks
Sometimes I Doodle Comics
58K posts
you can call me Berry or Mort (he/him) Despair is simple, and humanity is complex. If this blog looks familiar, it's because I'm the guy who Shakespeareifies posts. Click here for Shakespearified postsI don't have a "DNI", but fuck terfs
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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"these researchers published a paper on something that literally any of us could have told you 🙄" ok well my supervisors wont let me write something in my thesis unless I can back it up with a citation so maybe it's a good thing that they're amplifying your voice to the scientific community in a way that prevents people from writing off your experiences as annecdotal evidence
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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these are KILLING me
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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embarrassing: this girl thought that glory and honor were real things and has only now realized that her death will be nothing but feeding a meaningless meatgrinder
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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Dark World based on my room... something like that
I think they'd all live in trailers since I move from dorm to dorm and keep most of my stuff in boxes
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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Idea: skyjousting is the next sport that has been spreading across the realms! Contestants ride on flying steeds (Pegasus, hippogriff, vulture-cow etc) and attempt to knock each other out of the saddle. In smaller towns, the joust is done about 15 feet up, with a shallow pool of water to cushion the fall. However, there are more enhanced and wealthy stadiums in the cities, where legions of fans can watch from elevated seats as knights clash 100 feet in the air. Some of these have mages with Feather Fall on hand. Some don’t.
Skyjousting is a series of opposed checks - the riders make a Ride check and the mounts make a Fly check. The winner of the Ride check gets a bonus to a subsequent attack roll, and the winner of the Fly check gets a bonus on a Fortitude save. If you hit your opponent but they don’t fall off (worth a point) your lance may break. If you hit your opponent and do unhorse (unpegasus) them, you score three points. The first rider to score three points will win.
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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My mom’s friend’s parents had two beautiful cherrywood coffins built by an artisan for them and stored in their basement until they were needed. Which I think is so badass. Why put the burden of buying the $2k+ casket on your family when you’re dead? Why not preorder so you can have a Halloween decoration?
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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People will literally be doing anything on ao3
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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all i want is to get hellsitegeneticsed. i want to know what kind of creature my post is. god i want it to be something cool sooooooooo bad do you think they have the genetic code for werewolves
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Congratulations to Brooke from Let's Not Date for winning Father's Day.
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mortimermcmirestinks · 1 day ago
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decided to do a little bit of warm up portraits of some fav trek charas
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mortimermcmirestinks · 2 days ago
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I think I may have solved a mystery that I didn’t even know was one.
So. In Peter Pan, the novel, this is the first mention of Captain Hook:
“Who is captain now?” “Hook,” answered Peter, and his face became very stern as he said that hated word. “Jas. Hook?” “Ay.” Then indeed Michael began to cry, and even John could speak in gulps only, for they knew Hook’s reputation. “He was Blackbeard’s bo’sun,” John whispered huskily. “He is the worst of them all. He is the only man of whom Barbecue was afraid.”
Later, we learn this:
Hook was not his true name. To reveal who he really was would even at this date set the country in a blaze; but as those who read between the lines must already have guessed, he had been at a famous public school; and its traditions still clung to him like garments, with which indeed they are largely concerned.
“Barbecue” is Long John Silver from Treasure Island. Jas. is short for James, but in “Captain Hook at Eton,” he’s also called Jacobus. The biblical figure Jacob was renamed Israel.
Blackbeard’s historical boatswain, and also a character in Treasure Island, was Israel Hands.
I’m just saying, if I got a hand chopped off and my last name was Hands… I might want to change it.
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