mortuarywriting
mortuarywriting
Perpetually in Progress
2K posts
Howdy, I'm Morg!Gonna be 18+ Here, LadsAny Pronouns (Whatever's Funniest) | 25+Gonna be writing whatever, we'll see what there is to see!
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mortuarywriting · 22 hours ago
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mortuarywriting · 2 days ago
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Some of you have never been tied up, gagged, and thrown over your knight's shoulder to teach you a thing or two about humility, and it shows.
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mortuarywriting · 2 days ago
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[husbandry au] [text message from Perce] "hey man. do you know what this is"
[blurry picture of a transhuman pup covered in dirt and the faintest trace of a golden psychic halo]
"found him out in the potato fields, did a guardsman regiment lose him"
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WHO LEFT THEIR INFANT FUCKING EMPEROR IN A FIELD?
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mortuarywriting · 2 days ago
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How it feels to read a really good fic and find the author has dozens more like it 
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mortuarywriting · 3 days ago
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What's the deal between Farsight and the Ethereals?
In the initial lore (from older codexes), it was fairly simple; Farsight saw the merit of engaging in values and tactics that were at odds with the tenets of the Greater Good espoused by the Ethereals, particularly inter-caste knowledge sharing and melee combat specialisation. Things that would allow the soldiery, and thus the wider T'au Empire, to be more warlike and defend/expand borders.
This came to a head on the planet Arthas Moloch, where a war with Orks saw the Ethereals under Farsight's protection killed, implicitly in part due to the squabbling between Farsight and said Ethereals. After this war (during which Farsight found the Dawn Blade and fucked up a lot of Orks) he ended up breaking off from the T'au Empire with those loyal to his views to form the Farsight Enclaves; a more militarily focused take on the base Empire.
Overall, it was a decent look at how authoritarian/inflexible thinking and doctrines could create schisms, even in the milder cultures of 40k.
The Kelly era T'au, of course, added to this in a Kelly-esque fashion. It wasn't JUST that the Ethereals didn't like Farsight's views, but ALSO they were hiding info about CHAOS and DAEMONS from the T'au and doing EVIL MIND CONTROL on the T'au and it wasn't just Orks that showed up on Arthas Moloch but DAEMONS that the T'au weren't prepared for because of the aforementioned EVIL MIND CONTROL and DAEMONS killed the Ethereals and Farsight killed them back with the Dawn Blade. After that he confirms his suspicions about the EVIL MIND CONTROL and, when faced with the choice of revealing the EVIL MIND CONTROL to the entire T'au Empire and destroying it all (because the Empire is held together by EVIL MIND CONTROL) or walking away with his loyalists, he chooses to walk away. Because he cares about the T'au as a whole and is BIG HERO. Not one of those ethereals and their EVIL MIND CONTROL.
E V I L M I N D C O N T R O L
Fuck knows how it'll go if Van Nguyen and his actually good T'au writing are allowed to touch Farsight.
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mortuarywriting · 3 days ago
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Zoom In, Don’t Glaze Over: How to Describe Appearance Without Losing the Plot
You’ve met her before. The girl with “flowing ebony hair,” “emerald eyes,” and “lips like rose petals.” Or him, with “chiseled jawlines,” “stormy gray eyes,” and “shoulders like a Greek statue.”
We don’t know them.
We’ve just met their tropes.
Describing physical appearance is one of the trickiest — and most overdone — parts of character writing. It’s tempting to reach for shorthand: hair color, eye color, maybe a quick body scan. But if we want a reader to see someone — to feel the charge in the air when they enter a room — we need to stop writing mannequins and start writing people.
So let’s get granular. Here’s how to write physical appearance in a way that’s textured, meaningful, and deeply character-driven.
1. Hair: It’s About Story, Texture, and Care
Hair says a lot — not just about genetics, but about choices. Does your character tame it? Let it run wild? Is it dyed, greying, braided, buzzed, or piled on top of her head in a hurry?
Good hair description considers:
Texture (fine, coiled, wiry, limp, soft)
Context (windblown, sweat-damp, scorched by bleach)
Emotion (does she twist it when nervous? Is he ashamed of losing it?)
Flat: “Her long brown hair framed her face.”
Better: “Her ponytail was too tight, the kind that whispered of control issues and caffeine-fueled 4 a.m. library shifts.”
You don’t need to romanticise it. You need to make it feel real.
2. Eyes: Less Color, More Connection
We get it: her eyes are violet. Cool. But that doesn’t tell us much.
Instead of focusing solely on eye color, think about:
What the eyes do (do they dart, linger, harden?)
What others feel under them (seen, judged, safe?)
The surrounding features (dark circles, crow’s feet, smudged mascara)
Flat: “His piercing blue eyes locked on hers.”
Better: “His gaze was the kind that looked through you — like it had already weighed your worth and moved on.”
You’re not describing a passport photo. You’re describing what it feels like to be seen by them.
3. Facial Features: Use Contrast and Texture
Faces are not symmetrical ovals with random features. They’re full of tension, softness, age, emotion, and life.
Things to look for:
Asymmetry and character (a crooked nose, a scar)
Expression patterns (smiling without the eyes, habitual frowns)
Evidence of lifestyle (laugh lines, sun spots, stress acne)
Flat: “She had a delicate face.”
Better: “There was something unfinished about her face — as if her cheekbones hadn’t quite agreed on where to settle, and her mouth always seemed on the verge of disagreement.”
Let the face be a map of experience.
4. Bodies: Movement > Measurement
Forget dress sizes and six packs. Think about how bodies occupy space. How do they move? What are they hiding or showing? How do they wear their clothes — or how do the clothes wear them?
Ask:
What do others notice first? (a presence, a posture, a sound?)
How does their body express emotion? (do they go rigid, fold inwards, puff up?)
Flat: “He was tall and muscular.”
Better: “He had the kind of height that made ceilings nervous — but he moved like he was trying not to take up too much space.”
Describing someone’s body isn’t about cataloguing. It’s about showing how they exist in the world.
5. Let Emotion Tint the Lens
Who’s doing the describing? A lover? An enemy? A tired narrator? The emotional lens will shape what’s noticed and how it’s described.
In love: The chipped tooth becomes charming.
In rivalry: The smirk becomes smug.
In mourning: The face becomes blurred with memory.
Same person. Different lens. Different description.
6. Specificity is Your Superpower
Generic description = generic character. One well-chosen detail creates intimacy. Let us feel the scratch of their scarf, the clink of her earrings, the smudge of ink on their fingertips.
Examples:
“He had a habit of adjusting his collar when he lied — always clockwise, always twice.”
“Her nail polish was always chipped, but never accidentally.”
Make the reader feel like they’re the only one close enough to notice.
Describing appearance isn’t just about what your character looks like. It’s about what their appearance says — about how they move through the world, how others see them, and how they see themselves.
Zoom in on the details that matter. Skip the clichés. Let each description carry weight, story, and emotion. Because you’re not building paper dolls. You’re building people.
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mortuarywriting · 3 days ago
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'he would not fucking say that' maybe he would if he knew he was starring in his very own porn fic for the sole purpose of delighting some freaks on archive of our own dot org. maybe he'd play it up for the cameras. ever consider that
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mortuarywriting · 3 days ago
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if you're posting a whole fanfiction to tumblr you've got to put it under a readmore boss
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mortuarywriting · 3 days ago
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Thinking about "came back wrong" Price, but he's come back better. John is brusque when he returns home from deployment, monosyllabic, closed off. He barely looks at you, barely speaks to you, sits in his office by himself for hours, cigar smoke creeping out into the hallway while you sit by and wait to see if the man that comes out of the room next will be the sweet, smiling, attentive man that you fell in love with, or the Captain.
You keep your head down when the Captain's home. He only needs two things from you when he's like this, and you're prompt with dinner, and bend over uncomplainingly when he tells you to. It's just a matter of time before your loving husband returns. You just have to be patient.
But this time... He's just John as soon as he walks in the door, and he beams when he sees you, and kisses you like it's all he's been able to think about during the long months away. He pulls you away from the kitchen and makes love to you, and the only smoke that fills the house is the dinner that burns while he refuses to let you out of bed. And then he offers to take you out, or order in. His eyes stay soft, and he doesn't reach for the whiskey or cigars all night.
He's buried face-first in your pussy when the door bangs open, and the Captain comes home. This is the husband you expected, eyes as cold as the stormy Atlantic, tense and ready for a fight, mouth set in a grim line. The look he gives you is murderous before he focuses on the interloper, dragging John away from you roughly.
The Captain hesitates a moment too long when he sees his own face staring back at him. It's long enough for John to lunge at him, the two of them hitting the floor, growling and snapping like dogs. The Captain goes for his gun, and John knocks it out of his grip. It skitters across the floor and stops in front of your feet.
You snatch it up, hands shaking. You tell them to stop, and they both freeze.
"Shoot him," the Captain orders.
It's obvious that John is the pretender. You should have known. It was too much to hope that he would come home happy to see you.
You study them both down the barrel of the gun, meeting the furious eyes of the Captain, and John's soft gaze. He expects that you'll do what you're told and shoot him, and he doesn't blame you. The understanding there is enough to shock you into pulling back the safety.
You take a steadying breath, and fire.
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mortuarywriting · 4 days ago
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i hate seeing people drink the openai/chatgpt koolaid 😭😭😭 genuinely feels like watching someone get seduced by scientology or qanon or something. like girl help it's not intelligent it's Big Autocomplete it's crunching numbers it's not understanding things i fuckign promise you. like ohhh my god the marketing hype fuckign GOT you
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mortuarywriting · 4 days ago
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mortuarywriting · 5 days ago
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My brain: hmmm I want to write something.
Each of my WIP: me?
My brain: no 💅
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mortuarywriting · 5 days ago
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i've been in fandom spaces for about 18 years or so at this point and i never thought we'd hit a point where this has to be said
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mortuarywriting · 6 days ago
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Nius, grandpa kulikov’s fucked up khornate molt sanguinius
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mortuarywriting · 6 days ago
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It's not enough to call your knight a "good boy". Sometimes you've got to hit him with a "you're the only one worthy to sit at my feet".
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mortuarywriting · 6 days ago
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you're not turning your fandom hobby into a job are you? giving yourself deadlines and quotas that you have to meet? focusing on the numbers instead of your enjoyment of the act of creation?
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mortuarywriting · 8 days ago
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Ash and Silence
gn!reader x Grey Knight
A/n: who's surprised I hyperfixated on this since mentioning it (*ノ▽ノ*) but ooooooh boy do I have some fucked up plans for the reader. Also note, I wrote this in 3rd person at first so you're named Alarice, nicknamed Al (gn!). I love a good 2 letter nickname. It's only mentioned once but idk warning lol. Enjoy!
Cw: Canon adjacent descriptions of gore, suuper slow burn (mostly just plot), tryna build some yearning/pining, maybe some vulnerability
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Banner credit - support the artist!
You don’t remember when the manufactorum stopped screaming.
Maybe it was after Jex vanished into the floor. Maybe it was when Merek’s bones turned inside out in front of you, or when Thessa’s hands started bleeding eyes. Doesn’t matter. There’s quiet now.
That’s what counts.
You sit with your back to a slagged pillar, one leg stretched, the other drawn up. The rebreather’s filter is half-clogged with soot, and every breath feels like swallowing warm grit. You let your lasgun rest across your thighs. You stopped aiming it at anything hours ago. It’s a gesture now. Like a prayer. Or a superstition.
Ash clings to your armor in soft gray drifts. It coats the edges of your lashes, it fills the seams of your gloves. Even the blood’s gone dry. Just another layer of dust. The dead don’t rot here—they desiccate, freeze-dried in horror.
The wind occasionally shifts the air, stirring the high-hung cables that sway like broken chimes. Somewhere, a cogitator ticks faintly, its logic looped beyond meaning. Nothing else moves.
Your vox is dead. Your squad is gone. You’re not sure why you aren’t.
Maybe the Emperor forgot to cross your name off the list.
You tilt your head back and look through the broken slats in the roof, up at the red-bloated sun bleeding through the ashfall. The light turns the world to rust and bruises. You don’t blink. You’ve been awake too long for blinking to be useful.
Then—
A pressure. Not sound. Not sight.
Weight.
It pushes into your sternum like a breath you didn’t take. Subtle. But wrong.
The air tightens. As if it remembers what’s about to happen before you do.
Your fingers twitch against your lasgun’s grip, but you don’t raise it. Not yet.
Another pulse. Closer. Like the beat of a second heart.
Then the world cracks.
Not thunder—not explosion. Something deeper. Internal. Reality groans like old steel. The air in front of you folds inward, not out, collapsing into a fist of silver light. You flinch, reflexive—half-expecting daemonic fire, teeth, the shriek of warp-born laughter.
Instead—
Stillness.
Ash stops falling midair. The wind holds its breath.
And then the thing steps out.
Eight feet of silver plate, bearing a blade that glows with script older than your understanding. The armor is covered in sacred geometry and high Gothic—names of saints you’ll never know, fragments of prayers etched into ceramite like scars.
You don’t breathe.
He is impossibly solid. Like someone carved a war-god from moonstone and set him walking. The air around him hums with psychic charge, like the moment before lightning strikes—but colder.
He doesn’t look at you. Not at first.
His head scans the scene, slow and deliberate. Tactical. Efficient. His gauntlet twitches. You don’t know what he sees—your dead squad, the daemon-scarred walls, the warp-tear where Thessa bled out screaming?
Probably all of it.
You try not to stare.
But you do.
Because nothing about this is normal. This isn’t a Commissar or a Chaplain. This is something else. Something that shouldn’t exist in the same space you do. His presence makes the inside of your skull itch, but it doesn’t hurt. It’s not daemonic. It’s worse. It’s clean.
He turns, finally. His helm pivots. Not fast. Not deliberate.
A glance.
And maybe it lands on you.
Maybe.
You feel it—not on your body, but somewhere under your ribs. The sensation of being seen without being understood. Like a surgical light over a wound. No judgment. No emotion. Just exposure.
You don’t move.
He doesn’t either.
You tell yourself it’s nothing.
Just a sweep. A battlefield check. A reflex. He’s cataloguing the living. Not noticing you. Not really.
But even when his gaze moves on, the feeling lingers.
Like fingerprints on your skin.
Like something is different now, and you don’t have the words to name it.
You don’t rise when he moves.
There’s no ceremony in it. No reverence. He doesn’t gesture. Doesn’t pause to observe the fallen or make the sign of the aquila. He steps past the bodies like they aren’t there—like you aren’t there.
Because of course he does.
You’re not part of this equation. You're the afterimage of someone who mattered, maybe. A survivor. Collateral. You’re not his.
Your heart hammers in your throat all the same.
He moves like weight incarnate. Measured. Unhurried. As if time will pause for him, not the other way around. The ash moves around him, shifting like it knows better than to settle on his armor. Even the blood on the ground seems to recoil.
Your dead squadmates lie in pieces beside you. Names you whispered under your breath for days now—some you prayed for. Some you didn’t. He doesn't look at them. He doesn’t look at you.
And yet…
When he passes, something changes.
Not in him. In you.
That presence—that gaze—even if it only flicked over you for a heartbeat, it stays. Like static under your skin. Like the hum of a lascoil still cooling after discharge. You feel... watched. Touched. Branded.
No words.
No gesture.
Not even a nod.
He walks into the ruin, deeper into the dark, his blade low and humming, his psychic aura flaring like the distant memory of a star. You watch him disappear down the corridor where no one else came back. No guardsman. No tech-priest. No mortal.
Just him.
The whispering in your skull fades. The daemonhost’s voice gone.
He didn’t even speak a rite.
You’re alone again.
Only now, the silence feels… different.
Like the echo of something that almost noticed you.
...
You don’t follow him.
Not because you aren’t tempted. You are.
There’s something about the way he moved—weightless in all that armor, as if the world had already yielded to his presence. Something in you wanted to stay close, to be where the silence bent around him, where the warp didn’t whisper anymore.
But that silence wasn’t meant for you.
You’re not part of his war.
So you pull yourself upright, muscles dragging behind your thoughts. You feel like someone else’s body. The suit’s weight is doubled by dried blood, grit, and the smell—Emperor, the smell. Burned wiring, spoiled meat, ozone. Every breath tastes of it.
You’re still alive.
But barely.
You shoulder your lasgun. You check the charge out of habit—it’s fine. Mostly. Then you turn down the eastern corridor, toward the secondary signal beacon. The one Tech-Adept Sero had been crawling toward before he stopped responding.
It’s stupid.
But it’s something.
The manufactorum stretches around you in towering halls of broken servitors, collapsed data-stacks, and rusted shrines. Every wall is layered in once-glorious purity seals, now curled and blackened with warp-rot. The cogitator screens still flicker, but they speak in tongues—long strings of binary gibberish and broken prayers.
The further you go, the quieter it gets.
Not normal quiet.
The kind that listens.
Your boots crunch over glass. Something behind the wall shudders—something deep, something alive. The metal groans like it’s breathing.
And the shadows move.
You stop cold.
Not far ahead, a lumen flickers. Then dies. The corridor beyond is a throat—dark and slick, humming faintly.
You’ve seen what comes from places like that.
Warp ghosts. Machine-possessed. Crawlers.
You reach into your belt pouch, fingers closing around the last vial of sacred oil. Still sealed. You make the sign of the aquila across your chest—silent, fast, half-habit, half hope.
And you move forward.
Every step is louder now. The ash muffles little. Your breath hisses against the mask.
Then you hear it.
Not footsteps.
Not speech.
Just metal on metal. Long, dragging. Inhumanly slow.
You freeze again, back flattening against the wall of a servo-rail. You aim down the corridor, lasgun steady, vision dancing between red emergency lights and dark. Your heart pounds—but you’ve learned to breathe through that. Long ago.
The sound stops.
Silence.
And then—wet clicking. A sound like teeth, or bone.
You don’t call for help.
You don’t pray.
You wait.
Because whatever’s down that corridor?
It’s closer than the Grey Knight.
And it knows you’re here.
...
You move through the dark with your finger resting light on the trigger. The lumen strips overhead flicker in broken bursts—strobing the world into fragments. Each breath rasps through your mask, each heartbeat a countdown.
You’re two levels below where the Adept’s last ping came from.
The corridors here are tighter. Thick with condensation and the stink of sacrilegious coolant. Cables hang like viscera from burst wall-panels. A servitor floats face-down in a coolant trough, its flesh gray, half-melted, still twitching. You don’t look too long.
The signal beacon’s light grows stronger the deeper you go—an automated pulse, weak but consistent.
You round a corner and freeze.
He’s there.
Adept Sero.
Or… the thing that used to be him.
He’s hunched over the beacon, data-jack spliced directly into its core. Tubing runs from his neck into the wall. His mechadendrites twitch spasmodically, weaving through the air like snakes in oil. His back is bare, his robes torn and soaked with some black, glistening fluid that moves too slowly to be blood.
The machine around him is alive in the wrong way.
The steel breathes.
You hear the cogitator singing—not binary, not code. A low, wet hum. Like a heartbeat shaped into prayer.
The Adept lifts his head. You freeze again. Lasgun steady.
His face is smeared with ink, ritual script running from eye to jaw. His eyes don’t blink. Don’t focus.
And his mouth moves.
"I am Sero. Sero is inside. Inside is warm. Inside is light."
You don’t speak.
The beacon pulses. The same phrase plays back in a broken voice—looped over and over: In Omnissiah’s name, purge complete. In Omnissiah’s name, purge complete.
But nothing here is purged.
The Adept takes a step toward you. Limbs stiff. Neck clicking as it turns. The data-jack yanks free with a wet pop. The black tubing slithers back into the wall like a retreating tongue.
He raises a hand toward you.
"You’re cold," he rasps. "Come inside. We kept a place for you."
You shoot him in the knee.
It drops him fast.
He doesn’t scream. He doesn’t bleed.
He giggles.
You take three steps forward and shoot him again, this time through the chest. His torso caves inward, but the grin stays wide, eyes glowing faintly with something else.
"You don’t want to be alone," he gurgles.
And the walls respond.
The beacon shuts off.
The lights die.
The hallway groans around you—flesh-rip and iron-scream.
Something behind the Adept’s body opens. A hatch. A mouth. A door that was never there before. Inside, the dark breathes.
You back up fast, lasgun trained.
But something crawls out.
Too fast.
Too low.
Too wet.
You fire again.
And again.
And then you run.
Not because you're afraid.
Because you're not done yet.
...
You don’t look back.
The moment you cross the threshold of the last lit hall, something in the walls closes. You feel it. Hear it. Like wet stone grinding shut behind your boots.
The thing that used to be Sero—whatever came out of him—is moving. Not fast, not loud. But persistent. Confident.
It doesn’t have to chase you.
It just has to wait for you to slow down.
You push yourself harder. Down one corridor, then another. The pathways twist—spiral—grow unfamiliar. You passed this junction before, didn’t you? No. No, this one has a different shrine inset in the wall. This one’s eyes are gouged out.
You turn again.
Dead servitors line the walls, some fused into place. The ones that aren’t dead twitch when you pass. One reaches out for you, vocalizer sputtering a hymn warped into static. You shoot it through the skull and keep running.
Your shoulder slams into a doorway. Pain blossoms. Doesn’t matter.
You flick on your underbarrel torch—half expecting to catch a silhouette in the beam.
Nothing.
Only the sound of scraping. Behind you. Or in the vents. Or under the floor.
The hatch ahead is half-jammed. You slam your body into it three times before it gives. It opens into a maintenance crawlspace—low-ceilinged, damp, full of cable bundles like exposed nerves.
You drop to your hands and knees.
You crawl.
The air tastes like scorched plastic. Your shoulder throbs. The torch flickers.
Then, behind you—
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Like claws. Or bone.
The tunnel breathes. You hear the wet hiss of a mouth too close.
You move faster.
There’s an access panel ahead. A climb. A vertical shaft with an emergency ladder. Half-rusted. Greased in black oil. But it’s up. It’s out.
You wrench the hatch open, half expecting something to grab your ankle.
Nothing.
You climb.
You hear something laugh below you. No words. Just the sound of amusement shaped by meat.
You climb faster.
By the time you slam the top hatch shut and weld it with the last of your torch’s charge, your hands are shaking. Your arms are numb. And your mouth is full of copper.
The hallway beyond is mercifully silent.
The beacon’s signal is gone. The Adept is dead. Or something worse.
But you’re alive.
Alone.
In a place that doesn’t want you.
You sit against the wall for a moment, helmet tilted back. Your breath steams. Your shoulder aches.
And beneath your skin… you swear you can still feel the pressure of cables. Like something watching from behind your own eyes.
So naturally, you move.
...
You hear them before you see them.
Voices.
Human.
Too human.
Not the clipped vox-speak of officers. Not the static-blurred panic of a dying comm line. These are low murmurs, pacing back and forth, like rats arguing over whose turn it is to chew.
You move quiet. Low. Gun angled. Breath tight.
Light flickers ahead—not the red of emergency strips. White. A lumen lamp, weak but steady. It’s set behind a barricade of broken servitors and half-melted rebar. You count four figures. Maybe five. One’s bent over a dataslate. One clutches a lasgun that looks older than you. One is just… rocking.
Then someone turns.
And the world shifts under your feet.
“Alarice?”
You don’t recognize her at first.
The left half of her face is metal—rushed work, brutal and incomplete. Grafts like panic medicine. Still twitching. Her eye there glows cold-blue in the dark, wide and wrong.
But the voice is familiar.
And the right side of her mouth still curves into that half-smirk you remember.
“It’s you,” she says again. “Emperor, you look like hell.”
You freeze.
Lasgun steady. Heart hammering.
You don’t raise it. Not yet.
“Jenna?”
She nods. Casual. Like you’re back in the mess hall.
“They pulled me out. Didn’t think they could. But I was still breathing. And they said I could be… better.”
That last word stumbles—too many syllables in too little air.
You look past her. One of the others mutters binary in a human tongue. Another’s fingers tap the metal of their own jaw like it itches. None of them blink.
None of them breathe right.
Jenna steps closer.
“You made it this far. That means something. They’ll see that.”
You don’t lower the gun.
“Who?”
She doesn’t answer. Just keeps walking.
“Come inside. It’s safer. You’re shaking. Let me help.”
You should say something.
Anything.
Beg her to stop.
Ask her to come back.
But nothing comes.
Because deep down, you don’t believe she ever left.
You’d seen her dragged under a munitions hauler six days ago. She was screaming.
She shouldn’t be standing.
But she is.
Mostly.
“You’re not Jenna,” you whisper.
Her smile flickers. For a heartbeat, something tries to feel human in her eyes. Then it hardens.
“Don’t be stupid, Al. I remember you. I chose to remember you.”
That’s worse than forgetting.
You aim.
Not because you want to.
Because this is what comes after hope dies.
“I’m sorry.”
You fire.
Once. Twice.
Her body jerks, convulses. But she doesn’t scream.
She just looks… disappointed.
The others twitch.
One speaks—not in their voice. In hers.
“You should’ve come inside.”
Another’s mouth moves, syncing to her last words.
“You should’ve come—”
You open fire.
Ash kicks up, mingled with oil and smoke and wet metallic steam. The barricade erupts with movement—half-lunges, aborted charges, servo-limbs scraping against stone.
You run.
And something breaks behind you.
Not a door.
Not a barricade.
Something in the air.
The pressure drops. The air goes soft.
Like something just started listening.
---
Elsewhere—
The purge was complete.
The manufactorum tower lay in ruins—its upper levels gutted by orbital fire, its lower corridors cleansed in flame and blade. Smoke lingered in the steel arches like a ceiling of ghosts. The red emergency strips along the walls still flickered, sputtering beneath layers of soot and congealed ash.
In the center of the chamber, where a generator shrine had once pulsed with sacred voltage, now there was only blood and silence.
Brother-Captain Rhael Uthorion stood in the stillness.
His armor—adamantium-gray, carved with a hundred sacred sigils—was marked with impact scoring and warp-burns. The purity seals along his greaves fluttered in the acrid wind of a vent fan still struggling to breathe. His helm remained sealed, his visor lit from within with a faint, unreadable glow.
Around him, three Grey Knights moved through the aftermath with ritual precision.
Brother Dhael, youngest of the four, knelt beside the corpse of a warp-scorched astropath, whispering the Litany of Cleansing as he drove a sanctified dagger into the base of the skull.
Brother Carvion moved among the daemonic dead, his warding incensor hissing with blessed myrrh, sprinkling each dismembered husk with sacred oil. He did not look down. He did not need to.
Thur Vox, the oldest among them, stood with bolter lowered but not holstered. He was still. Watchful. An empty threat, held in reserve.
They did not speak unless ordered.
That was the way of it.
Command is not dialogue, Rhael had once told an Inquisitor.
It is containment.
Now, he walked slowly through the center of the ruin, halberd lowered.
The weapon’s haft had scorched the stone where he had planted it minutes earlier—when he’d severed the final tether between the daemon and this place. Its blade still glowed faintly, faint traces of holy residue humming through the runes etched into its core.
He paused beside what remained of the warp gate.
Once, it had been a junction altar—where the tech-priests of this manufactorum had offered prayers before engaging the core-matter reactors. Now it was a blackened circle of fused ceramite, the walls above it warped into spindled shapes that did not belong in a real world.
Rhael stared down at the ruin.
There was nothing to read. No message. No symbol.
Just damage.
And yet his gaze lingered.
He did not kneel.
But he reached up, and slowly unsealed his helm.
The hiss of pressure loss was soft, reverent. He placed the helm beneath his arm, letting the oily air of the manufactorum touch his skin for the first time in three hours.
The silence was deeper now. Not absence. Something else.
Like the end of a breath.
“Captain,” came Dhael’s voice, quiet. “All confirmed. No hostile signs remain. No bio-signatures left in the sector.”
Rhael did not turn.
“You're certain.”
Dhael hesitated a beat.
“The auspex reads clean. If anything survived the purge, it left before the gate collapsed.”
Rhael let his eyes drift closed.
He tasted ash and steel and warp-burn on the air. Beneath the chemical stink of corrupted machine-oil, there was another scent—
Blood.
Familiar, human blood.
Fresh.
Something was here.
But he said nothing.
Behind him, the other Knights gathered into loose formation. Silent. Waiting.
This was the part where a lesser unit would speak. Would exhale. Would mark the kill, or allow themselves a breath of something close to relief.
But Grey Knights did not breathe like other men.
They held.
Until they were told otherwise.
Rhael opened his eyes.
“Reconvene in three minutes. Prepare for meditative sanctification. No words until the rite begins.”
The others nodded and dispersed without question.
He turned once more toward the warped altar.
Watched the light flicker across the black glass.
And for the first time in hours—
He felt something he didn’t have a name for.
It was not fear.
It was not pain.
It was something quiet.
And unwelcome.
...
The sanctum was buried forty meters below the manufactorum’s throat—below the ash drifts, the warp-burned shrines, the machines that still screamed in binary static.
This far down, there were no more servitors. No cables. No light that hadn’t been brought by hand.
The air tasted of null-ash and sanctified oil. Every breath filtered through triple-blessed rebreathers. No psychic bleed was meant to survive down here. That was the point.
Rhael entered alone.
His armor had been removed with precision. Each plate laid on the ritual frame by servitor-handlers, then sprayed with micro-seraphim dust. His scarred skin gleamed with residue, sweatless and pale in the lumen-stripped dark.
He wore only the plain black robe of post-engagement cleansing—unmarked, unadorned. A Grey Knight is not supposed to bring anything of battle into this place.
Not memory.
Not pain.
Not pride.
Only discipline.
Only silence.
He knelt on the meditation slab. Stone. Cold.
The room was bare, circular—eight meters across, sealed with wards no living hand could draw. High above, incense smoke curled in slow, deliberate spirals from a burning censer suspended by chains.
He placed his hands on his thighs.
Closed his eyes.
And spoke the litany.
“From shadow I purge. From memory I cleanse. Let the mind be still. Let the echo break.”
He exhaled.
A single breath.
Then waited.
Stillness.
Nothing moved.
For twenty-one heartbeats, the ritual held.
Then—
It came.
Not a scream.
Not a vision.
Just… words.
Half-heard. Half-felt.
Not from the warp.
Not around him.
From within.
You should’ve come inside.
The voice was soft. Not mocking. Not daemonic.
Human.
He opened his eyes.
The sanctum did not change.
But the pressure behind his eyes pulsed like heat through ice.
He rose, slowly.
His hand rested on the slab’s edge.
He was not supposed to feel this. Not here.
Not now.
“Brother-Captain.”
The voice came from the archway. Librarian Thareon, helm under one arm, stood beyond the wards. He did not enter.
“Your psi-profile wavered.”
Rhael turned to face him. His voice did not tremble.
“Residual bleed.”
“It lasted eleven seconds.”
Rhael said nothing.
Thareon stepped closer, stopping just shy of the sanctum threshold.
“Do you want to know what it was?”
“No.”
A pause. Then:
“You will.”
Thareon’s tone held no emotion. But the weight behind it was real.
“Do you remember a name?”
Rhael stared at the burning censer.
Smoke twisted overhead, forming nothing.
“There was no name.”
“But there was something.”
The Captain didn’t answer.
Not immediately.
Then:
“A sentence.”
“What did it say?”
Rhael’s jaw tightened. Not visibly. But he felt it.
He looked back at the stone. The stillness. The fire.
The silence.
“You should’ve come inside.”
Thareon nodded.
“I’ll begin the trace.”
Rhael’s hands curled at his sides.
“It’s not daemonic.”
“I know.”
"Then it shouldn’t exist.”
“I know.”
Neither moved.
Neither breathed in the way mortals do.
But the silence between them was no longer clean.
It remembered.
---
You’ve been moving for… minutes?
Hours?
Time’s gone soft at the edges. It doesn’t track properly anymore. There are no clocks here. Just the hiss of pressure lines and the slow throb of machine hearts beneath your boots.
Your shoulder’s bleeding again.
The bandage—stitched with one hand, sloppily wrapped—is already soaked. You press it tighter against the seam of your armor, breathing through your teeth, counting heartbeats to avoid screaming.
You’re not thinking about Jenna.
Not right now.
Because if you do, you’ll have to decide whether or not to count her corpse with the rest of your squad.
And you can’t do that. Not yet.
The corridor narrows. The light’s dimming. No lumen strips down here—just the pale red pulse of reserve emergency systems, casting long, pulsing shadows that move even when you don’t.
You step into a wider chamber. Storage, maybe, once. Racks of disassembled drones. A broken servitor crucified across a diagnostic rig—half its body carved open, organs replaced with placeholder circuits that never got filled.
You brace your back against a wall and slide down slowly, breath shallow.
Too quiet.
No whispers.
No warpshade slithering in the vents.
Just… silence.
And heat.
The temperature’s rising.
You don’t know why. Nothing’s running down here. No generators. No core access. But the air is thickening like furnace breath, and your skin crawls with static that’s not quite pain.
You close your eyes.
Not sleep. Just rest.
Just—
---
[Flash / Not a Flash]
Something moves.
But not around you.
Inside.
Your arms are heavy.
But not your arms.
Gauntlets.
Ceramite gauntlets.
You can feel them.
Clumsy. Heavy. Perfectly balanced.
You try to flex your fingers—and feel metal respond.
There’s no pain.
Just weight.
Just war-readiness.
You open your eyes.
You’re not where you were.
The walls are clean.
Silver. Carved with script you almost understand.
You hear chanting.
Voices. Male. Unified. Beautiful in a way that makes your throat hurt.
High Gothic.
Not the battlefield bastard dialect.
The real thing.
The kind of speech you’d need three lifetimes to pronounce.
And you’re speaking it.
You feel it in your throat.
Perfect. Cold. Conviction in every syllable.
And your voice is—
---
No.
No, no, no—
You’re back.
You choke on a breath that doesn’t belong to you and gag.
Your mouth tastes like iron. Like burning.
Resolve. Cold, blinding resolve. Not yours.
Then it’s gone.
You curl forward, shaking, bracing yourself on the floor of the manufactorum as your stomach turns. You don’t vomit. There’s nothing left in you.
The gauntlets are gone.
Your hands are yours.
Your voice is quiet.
But your eyes are wet.
And you don’t remember why.
---
You sit there.
Alone.
Longer than you mean to.
Eventually, the heat fades.
But it doesn’t cool.
It withdraws.
Like something pulling back from your skin.
Like it touched you. And didn’t like what it found.
---
You are not a psyker. You are not a seer. You are nothing.
But something inside you is opening.
And you don’t know how to close it.
...
Manufactorum Sector—Substructural Overlap 9-A
...
You shouldn’t still be moving.
Your shoulder’s seizing up again—nerves pulling tight around something wet and broken. You’ve run out of bandages. You’ve run out of water. You’re running out of you.
But your legs keep going. Not out of hope.
Out of stubborn, empty habit.
The corridor ahead is split—one shaft leading down into the coolant crawlways, the other banking toward a support spine. You take the upper path. Instinct, not strategy.
The air’s thinner up here. Dryer.
But the pressure’s rising again. Like the world is holding its breath.
You don’t stop.
---
The vox ghosts are louder in this section—old machine-spirits echoing combat logs, static-warped prayers, the screams of men who might’ve never existed. You tune it out.
Mostly.
But when you reach the next chamber, you stop cold.
A kill zone.
Recent.
Las-scorch across the walls. Broken crawler limbs. Blood sprayed in two long arcs, like someone was cut from neck to groin and kept walking.
You step around it.
The bodies are missing.
Or they were never here.
You keep moving.
---
At the junction, you pause.
Only a moment.
There’s a flicker in the emergency lumen to your left—a clean one. Not flickering red. White.
It shouldn’t be on.
You blink hard.
Pain shoots across your temple. You’re running hot—fever, probably. You don’t care.
You move toward the light.
Not because it’s safe.
Because it’s different.
And nothing else down here has changed in hours.
---
The corridor narrows again—structural reinforcements added at some point during the war, maybe. Redundant load-bearing. Dense enough to block auspex.
You pass a bank of old vox repeaters. They’re warm.
Active.
But saying nothing.
The wall breathes when you touch it.
You keep going.
Just beyond the last support beam, the floor drops into a wide transition ramp. Shallow incline. Signs of movement—fresh. Bootprints, scored against ash and melted sealant.
Not yours.
Too heavy.
Too clean.
---
You freeze at the edge.
There’s noise below.
No voices. Just weight.
Metal on metal. A slow exhale of something living in the armor.
You duck behind the edge of a broken pump housing and listen.
Three footsteps. Then stillness.
Then two more.
Measured. Unhurried.
You peek.
It’s him.
---
The Grey Knight moves like there’s no war. His halberd is sheathed across his back. His head is bare. His armor still sings with quiet purity, like the hymn of a cathedral lit with fire and silence.
He’s not looking at you.
He’s tracking something.
You can feel it in the way he shifts—not cautiously, but with psychic calculation. He's close to something. Closer than he’s been in hours.
He steps beneath the red lumen flare and pauses.
His head turns slightly.
Toward you.
And you freeze.
You’re not in full view. You’re not breathing loud.
But you’re there.
And something in you knows—
He’s not looking for you.
But he still found you.
------------to be continued------------
I hope you guys enjoyed :)) I have a plan, this may be my first completed story lol.
Tagged: @incrediblethirst @druidwolf21 @thisuserislilsilly @kit-williams (yall want some plot?)
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