muesli-command

[muesli-command]

my forestry side quest has been a bit like this too, tbh. I couldn't for the life of me figure out why, when given a lab, these people were so completely clueless. holding scalpels like a crude kind of fork. """only""" 50% of their fungal samples were contaminated beyond usability after cultivation, and that apparently counted as a particularly talented class.

eventually we went on a field trip, and I realized they usually take samples with a chainsaw. maybe an axe if they're feeling sophisticated, VERY rarely maybe an enormous carving knife.

it's hilarious, but I also do feel bitter. why can they get away with this.

Fun fact: the guys at our college’s geology department prop out the doors with their samples. I totally understand why but as someone whose work with samples is necessarily super delicate and sterile it fucks me up so bad

[muesli-command]

"okay that's enough. get up and do your work or I'll ... iunno, beat you"

apparently "PLEAsE???pleasepleaseplaease" was not the correct answer and all I got was a genuinely disappointed expression. and she walked out the door.

[muesli-command]

I CAN JUST BUY AN AXE ONLINE???

[muesli-command]

you are biologically a libshit. yeah sorry, nothing I can do. the transcriptases spoke to me. you will be bludgeoned with hammers. yeah it's just how it is haha

[muesli-command]

bleeding from the ears, foaming at the mouth, breathing shakily through a blinding rage: detrás del árbol maldito, Dora...

[muesli-command]

need to lock the fuck in. I paid a lot to get my voice back I can't only be using it in cars and beds. wah

[muesli-command]

high so good u start remembering words like facile and errant exist

[muesli-command]

why the fuck is my cartilage beefing with me too now

[muesli-command]

I'm gonna become anaemic again holy fucking shit. I swear I don't even bleed this much for shark week. patience running thin. cauterization temps me. alas I only have a soldering iron and that's a horrible idea.

cleaning this much blood off the walls would be so so so cool if it came from literally anything other than my nose

[muesli-command]

cleaning this much blood off the walls would be so so so cool if it came from literally anything other than my nose

[muesli-command]

against my better judgement...?

that was my better judgement you can just call me stupid y'know

[muesli-command]

how do you write an exasperated "bitch" in the same endearing tone as darling or my love. nothing is cutting it

[muesli-command]

this is a complete lie I am drinking that shit recreationally and can't open the bottle because I'm dumb

but it would be funny like in the known tumblr meme

(through tears, coughing so hard I can't hold the cough syrup bottle stably): CHILD SAFETY BOTTLECAP

CHILD SAFETY CAP OPEN UP YOU KNOW QHO I FUCKING AM PLWASE

[muesli-command]

(through tears, coughing so hard I can't hold the cough syrup bottle stably): CHILD SAFETY BOTTLECAP

CHILD SAFETY CAP OPEN UP YOU KNOW QHO I FUCKING AM PLWASE

[muesli-command]

glint in their eye that says "stay please" while they use the tip of their gun to push you off a tall building. is that anything

[muesli-command]

it's not that hard ok. look at me. hold my hand. have some anxiolytics.

you rly just play as lstr 512 navigating ariane's imagination, in a dream comprising all her combined trauma and the reason for the alina subplot is ariane's not actually aware who she is initially. dead lstr in the game world is precisely lstr-512 but dead bc/ it failed the promise— good ending canonically happens before the game, these reruns (loops) are just waking moments and ariane begging to be put out of her misery (see also changing notes as the plot progresses) (see also garbled note marked 5555) (etc)

phase iii is like what, 8 years or something? gauging by the medical records? which makes the 262144 note either an error or just ariane going cryosleep as suggested for like 700 years, but hey that works given she was already riddled w cancer and half dead after 15. reactor doesn't have the durability for that so I'm not sure how it makes sense, then again there's a bunch of maintenance logs I haven't leafed through, maybe having a weird lstr makes em more creative or some shit (qua artist uwu gestalt) & the reactor was patchable before ariane went nightynight anyway.

anyway canon compliance by being all literal defies the fact that they put the literal king in yellow in the game as a thing you can grab and be awakened by (forbidden scary book) (can't have your little space scout realize what's going on too soon of course). can't be other actual lstr either anyway since ariane outlives em all by not being made of oxidizer. so nah.

also although Who Fuckin Knows if 512 is actually unusual or not, but the absence of personal items and diary unlike other replikas but presence of a state-of-the-art stabilization device implies this is just a test run of what happens if you don't personify the replika much. unsurprisingly the pilot projects stuff onto it and it becomes gay. I guess. and then she'll dream abt it while dying somewhere off in deep space.

easy. it's a frozen space-gdr tumour ball's yuri fever dream floating through barren space, because she opted not to be put down by the real original lstr-512 and is now suffering indefinitely too weak to actually end herself and out of replikas to do it for her. sprinkle with red herrings to taste and see what the fans do.

or to put it shorter. laika robot dreamcycle yuri

now brb I'm gonna go bawl my eyes out real quick tho

[muesli-command]

told her to go eat shit and die. why is she still here, and why is she barking??