mymeandering-blog

[mymeandering-blog]

NEW ZEALAND DAY 4 - Tewhakarewarewatangaoteopetauaawahiao

No, I didn’t just slam my head on the keyboard. Yes, those 37 letters make up the official name of the Maori village we visited in Rotorua. The village is a “living village,” which essentially means that the Maori people still live in the structures there and they offer tours as a means of getting by. This village in particular is characterized by the thermal hot springs that it sits on, which can create “hot holes” in the earth that cause the dirt to cave in and threaten their infrastructure. All around the village you’ll see steam rising up from the ground either in large ponds or through rocks in the earth. You’ll also notice a constant smell of rotten eggs in the air, coming from the sulfuric rocks laying around the hot springs.

Amidst the smell and the heat, however, is beautiful art and architecture created by a rich culture that celebrates its heritage through everything it does. We were able to watch the Maori people perform some of their traditional songs and dances including an old war dance and a love song. The harmonies that they sang gave me goosebumps. The people’s love for their history shines through in their houses and carvings that are scattered all around the grounds.

The intricate buildings are surrounded by beautiful turquoise lakes that can be seen after just a few short walks throughout the village.

The vibrant lakes aren’t the only natural aquatic wonder of the area, though. One of the village’s main attractions is the largest geyser in all of New Zealand, called “Pohutu,” that can reach up to 30 meters in height when it blows every 45-60 minutes. We couldn’t leave the village without watching the geyser erupt so we staked out a spot and waited for about 20 minutes before we got to experience nature do its thing right before our eyes.

Before heading out on our 6 hour drive to Wellington, we grabbed some ice cream for the road. I got a slushie-type thing but it didn’t come with a spoon, so I quietly took one from the restaurant we were in, and now I’m a bit concerned that I picked up some bad Juju from the Maori people for stealing their property. I guess we’ll have to wait and see if any more bad things happen to me on this trip, but based on everything I’ve dealt with so far, I think I’ll be able to handle it.

Our last stop before starting the drive was some nearby mud baths that were bubbling at the surface from the heat trapped underneath in the earth trying to make its escape. I have to say watching all the mud puddles bubble up and explode was pretty entertaining and I could’ve stayed there watching for hours.

The drive from Rotorua to Wellington was characterized by a lot of one thing: cows. Granted, there were definitely sheep on the way as well, but I was frankly astonished by the amount of cow farms that exist in the middle of New Zealand. They are pretty darn cute, though.

We finally made it to Wellington around 7:00 pm and ate dinner at this really cute Italian restaurant called “Cin Cin,” where I ate probably the best carbonara I ever had in my life. Then we headed to bed to rest up for another day full of activities.

xx

[mymeandering-blog]

NEW ZEALAND DAY 3 - The Road to Rotorua

We left from Auckland pretty early in the morning to get a head start on the traffic during our longer drive. We were originally planning on going to Hobbiton because it was directly on the way from Auckland to Rotorua and my dad is a big fan of LOTR, but of course it was all booked because it’s basically the Disneyland of New Zealand. So instead, we paid a visit to the Waitomo Glow Worm caves, which was equally as cool if not cooler, than taking a predictable picture in front of a small circular door with a bunch of tourists everywhere. In Waitomo, we went through a total of three caves.

The first was a boat tour of the most popular glow worm cave. Our tour guide reminded us that there were absolutely no photos allowed in the cave and once we entered the boat there would have to be absolute silence. So of course there’s one man who keeps taking pictures on his phone, and to top it all off we get stuck with the crying baby on our boat. It was still a really cool experience after I managed to tune out the baby whining in the row right in front of me. 

The second cave was probably the coolest experience. It was an hour and 45 minute walking tour of the biggest cave, where we got to see all the stalactites and stalagmite formations on the cave ceiling and floor, as well as see the glow worms up close and personal. 

I learned that glow worms have a pretty sad and useless life. They are actually in their prime when they are larvae (the ones that make the pretty blue glowing light) and they trap insects in these fishing line strings they hang from their body. Once they grow up into the gnat, however, they don’t have a mouth and have to find a mate and lay eggs all over the cave before they die of starvation. Seems like a pretty terrible circle of life to me, but they sure are pretty when they glow! (They definitely look cooler in real life than in this photo but hopefully you get the idea.)

The last cave we walked through was smaller, but made up for its size with some amazing cave structures inside. 

The whole day honestly took my breath away and made me consider the wonder of nature and how crazy it is that there is this world that exists just underneath the surface full of amazing beauty. 

After our final cave tour we loaded back up into the car and drove the final stretch to our little motel in Rotorua. We filled up with some dinner at a nice little restaurant where I had my first legal drink down under! 

xx

[mymeandering-blog]

NEW ZEALAND DAY 1/2 - Exploring Auckland

DAY 1 - Seeing the Sights

As soon as we landed in Auckland around 7:20 AM local time, we hit the ground running. We made our way through customs and secured our rental car in about an hour. As soon as we got to the car though, we realized that our free 2G data speed (thanks T-Mobile!) was far too slow to load any sort of GPS navigation so my mom ran back and bought a SIM card for her phone. It took my dad a second to get used to driving on the left side of the road and everything being backwards. He accidentally turned on the windshield wipers instead of the turn signal for a while at the start, and we still had to yell “Get in the left lane!” and fear for our lives a couple of times. 

The very first thing we did in Auckland was get food because we were starving, and the flat, desaturated looking eggs I had for breakfast on the plane were not cutting it for me. Luckily, I was saved by breakfast gods and had the most delicious avocado toast I’ve ever tasted in my life at a little place called “Ralph’s.” Here is photo evidence of it’s beauty (bottom plate) before I devoured the whole thing in a number of minutes. 

After filling up on breakfast and coffee we headed up to Mount Eden, where you can get a 360 degree view of the city of Auckland. It was a nice welcome to the city (minus the lady that told us to take all our valuables with us when we parked because there had recently been a break in right in the same spot we had pulled into). After a short but steep hike up the hill we got a great view of the city center!

Because we had some time to kill before checking into our apartment, we took a stroll around the harbor and looked at all the boats and buildings there were to see. The water just in the harbor was a crazy turquoise color. 

We also walked through a Maritime History Museum that was conveniently located right next to our apartment. My dad is really into boats and sailing so we mainly did this for him but it was pretty cool to see and learn about the history and culture around sailing in New Zealand, especially since Auckland is known as the ‘city of sails.’

That night we really took advantage of the local cuisine and ate some American food at a pub (this was sarcasm, if you couldn’t tell, sometimes it doesn’t come across in typing). I had popcorn fried chicken and sweet potato fries. We headed back to the apartment and got an early bedtime since we were all pretty tired from the traveling we’d been doing for the past day. 

DAY 2 - Snorkeling and A Stubbed Toe

An hour and a half north of Auckland is one of the most beautiful stretches of beaches you may ever encounter. We stopped at a small dive shop and bought ourselves some snorkel masks to take with us further up the coast. The lady who worked there gave us a labeled map of the best places to snorkel and sent us off on our merry way. The place we initially went to snorkel was fun, but I didn’t get too lucky and only saw around 15 fish, but the ones I did see were big and swimming up pretty close to us! I was a little worried that I would have to get in a confrontation with one of them when his little beady eyes stared right at me. 

After our dip in the water we drove out to another potential snorkel spot, but the waves were too rough and we moved on to drive through a bird sanctuary that led to another breathtaking beach.

We spent a while here, laying under the shade of a large tree, enjoying the sounds of the waves crashing against the shore and the loud cries of the locusts all around us. A trail behind our resting spot lead up to an incredible vista point where you could see the beach from above. It was truly paradise.

...It was truly paradise until I stubbed my toe on the way back from the beach on a seemingly harmless log in the sand. At first I thought nothing of it but then I thought “Hm, that really hurt more than usual…” so I looked down to see a solid chunk of my big toe just hanging on by a thread and blood starting to ooze out of the wound. What better place to cut open your toe than on a beach where all the minuscule grains of sand can embed themselves into your injury? Am I right?? I hobbled back to the car and we rinsed off my toe with some of our drinking water and threw a band aid on it for the time being until we made it back to our apartment in Auckland. I knew I wouldn’t be able to get through this vacation without a myriad of challenges being hurled at me, but I wasn’t going to let my little crippled toe have an impact on my vacation experience, at least for the most part. 

xx

[mymeandering-blog]

Saying Goodbye to What I Know

LETTING GO IS NEVER EASY

Today is the first of many days of travel in 2019 for me. A day ago I packed up everything I own into two wildly overweight suitcases to fly across the world and spend the next six months “down under.” I guess I’ll start from the beginning. 

As I sat forcefully on top of my suit case, begging for it to cooperate with me and close the zipper once and for all, I thought about all the things I was going to be leaving behind in the little town of Orange, California. My friends, my favorite coffee shops, my school, my job, and my sense of comfort and stability. If I’m being honest, though, my brain didn’t really process the fact that I was really leaving for six months never to see my friends again until the summer before our senior year. I think it was a kind of defense mechanism for myself, thinking that the less I really processed what was going on, the less it would hurt to say goodbye to all of these people that meant so much to me. 

The time came to say goodbye to my roommates, and I hugged them as tight as I could and kept on saying that it wasn’t goodbye and we would be talking again soon. As I got in the car and drove away though, I couldn’t help but cry as I watched them waving on the sidewalk, the image of them getting smaller and smaller, and for a moment the true weight and emotion that I had been pushing away for so long had creeped back out to the surface. 

Leaving my boyfriend Liam was a whole other story. Again, I refused to process any emotions up until the point of us actually pulling into the departures terminal at LAX. As soon as we exited the freeway a heavy pit started to form in my stomach like nothing I had ever felt before. 

“Oh god,” I thought to myself, “Am I about to sob in front of a bunch of absolute strangers on the sidewalk of LAX?” It definitely wasn’t looking to be my finest hour. 

Somehow, I managed to hold back the waterfall of fiery tears that were begging to burst out and make a scene. Liam was probably the hardest goodbye. No one ever tells you how to say goodbye to your first love and best friend. They certainly don’t tell you how to even start dealing with the mix of emotions that ensue. But I somehow made it through, and I watched him drive away with a little piece of my heart that day. 

NAVIGATING LAX

Now that the goodbyes were over, I had to navigate my way through this giant international airport all by myself. I sucked up the last of my tears and made my way through the sliding doors of LAX. Luckily, my airline check in was immediately to my right as I walked in. I got my boarding pass and walked up to the counter where I checked in my luggage. Judging by the fact that carrying my suitcase felt like dragging around a ton of bricks, I wasn’t surprised that my luggage was overweight. Like - so overweight that they had to put a “WARNING: Bend Knees” tag on it so that the airport workers didn’t break their backs while moving it. Lucky for me my second carry on was also overweight, by like 6 kilograms. So my airport experience was really off to a great start when the worker told me I would have to check both of my bags and pay a $180 additional fee for the extra weight. Looks like I’ll be getting a third suitcase while I’m in New Zealand. 

I have to say though, considering I am going to be gone for six whole months, I really didn’t pack that much. I knew something was going to go wrong during my travels (because something always does) and I was glad that I at least got it out of the way in the beginning, because then it could only go up from there, right? Wrong. 

I made it through security pretty quickly (thank god) and headed over to my gate, which was all the way at the end of the airport. The one plus side of checking both of my bags was that I didn’t have to roll anything around with me anymore at least. 

After a couple hours my parents landed in LAX from Seattle and we met up to eat dinner at the airport’s P.F. Changs. It wasn't long after then that we boarded our flight. 

THE PLANE RIDE

I’m going to start this little chapter by saying that overall my flight experience wasn’t 100% terrible. It actually went by way quicker than I thought it would, considering we were in the air for almost 13 hours. 

As much as I really wanted to sleep through the whole flight, I ended up not being able to (shocker) and watched four movies instead. I started with Me, Earl and the Dying Girl which I had been meaning to watch since my freshman year at Chapman. It didn’t disappoint, and luckily my two neighbors were asleep so they couldn’t see me crying at the end of the movie. Then I moved on to Crazy Rich Asians which was also very good and also made me cry. After that I watched the second installment in the Lord of the Rings series (because, New Zealand and all) which was really entertaining and ate up a pretty big chunk of the plane ride. The last movie I watched was Before Sunrise, which was also a movie I had been meaning to watch for a while, and it was cool that the main character had the same name as me because that never happens. 

Here’s where things started to go wrong.

Somewhere between my second and third movie, I decided to take off my shoes so that I could fit my feet more comfortably under the seat in front of me. As soon as my socks touched the floor I thought to myself, “Hm, the floor is really cold, or... is it... wet?” After some further investigation I realized that my water bottle (that I had filled up completely before the flight) had leaked all of its contents out into my backpack and onto the ground. 

I panicked and checked my camera and laptop to make sure they were okay, which luckily they were. But one of my books got soaked and the birthday card I had made for my mom got drenched to a point of no return- like the ink spread out so much that it looked like an abstract watercolor instead of a birthday card. So that was a major bummer. I spent the rest of the flight hoping that the soaking contents of my backpack would turn out alright, which they kind of did, considering. 

Luckily, the plane ride went by really fast thanks to those movies and the couple hours of sleep I managed to squeeze in, and I only had to get up once from my middle seat to go to the bathroom, which is an accomplishment for someone like me who hates confrontation and doesn’t want to bother anyone ever.

Honestly, I still haven’t processed the fact that I’m really out here doing it and traveling for six months. But, I’m sure that will come with time.

Until the next installment of this thrilling series, thanks for reading.

xx

[mymeandering-blog]

A Note for Junior Year

It’s Sunday August 26th, and I start my first day of junior year of college tomorrow. The summer has gone by in the blink of an eye, yet when I look back I can’t remember when it even began.

It’s hard to believe that I’ve already passed the halfway point of my college career. I remember adults always telling me “College will be the best time of your life, and those four years will go by so fast!” and me thinking about how much I wish time could slow down so that these years could last forever. 

I don’t really know how to feel. All I know is that this year is definitely going to be one for the books (and/or for this blog).

Sophomore year was not the best time for me, but I definitely learned a lot about myself and am ready to apply my newer sense of self to a brand new year. That being said, I made some goals for myself to stay on track this year. 

Keep saving money for study abroad

But don’t overwork yourself - make sure to schedule some “me time” into your week

Keep organized, don’t let simple tasks get away from you

Create new friendships while also building upon old ones

Try not to eat out too much (it’s a money suck!)

Focus on doing the things that make you feel happy & purposeful

Go through the year with the intention of bettering yourself with everything you do 

Recognize when you’re stressed and be able to pause and focus on yourself 

Realize that it’s okay to say no

Figure out what your dreams are

Keep on chasing those dreams!

Only commit yourself to the people who are willing to commit themselves to you

Call your family more

Make the most of study abroad !!

I’ll come back here at the end of the year and see if I was able to stay true to my intentions for this school year. For now, I have no idea what lies in store for me during this upcoming year, but I am excited to tackle all the challenges I will face and continue to strive for betterment each and every day. 

To future me: 

I hope your fall semester wasn’t as stressful as I’m picturing it now, and that you found a way to make everything work out in both your personal and professional life. I hope your study abroad was everything you imagined and more and that you made new life-long friends with some cute Aussie accents. I hope you’ve continued to make art, whether it be painting, writing, photography, or filmmaking, because you can do more than you give yourself credit for. Lastly, I hope you’ve really been able to connect to yourself and find a true sense of self that helps guide you through everything you do from here on out. I can’t wait to be you.

[mymeandering-blog]

The Cross-Country Road Trip

The week of July 27th to August 3rd was the best week of my summer. I got to visit 11 new states I’d never seen before all with the person I love. I learned so much about the hidden/forgotten parts of middle america and how vast and beautiful this country really is. My eyes were truly opened to the huge variety of lifestyles that exist in this country and how they all somehow coexist in one nation. 

Summary: America is beautiful. My perspective on this country has changed. I can’t wait to maybe do this all again someday. Adventure is everywhere!

[mymeandering-blog]

My First Tattoo Experience

THE INCEPTION

It had always been a thought in the back of my mind:

“What if I got a tattoo?”

After finding an artist and stalking his instagram (@jankyjake) for over a year, I finally built up enough courage to entertain the idea of making my vision a reality. Unfortunately, as soon as I was growing more comfortable with the thought, the artist moved across the world to Ireland and I thought all my hopes of realizing this dream were gone. 

When he shared that he would be returning to California for a limited time this summer, I took it as a sign that it was now or never. I knew if I didn’t do this now, I would just keep saying that it would happen eventually, and the plans would never come to fruition. 

Because I made the appointment a month in advance, I was scared I would get cold feet and talk myself out of it, as I often do. But after making the $50 deposit there was no way I was going to back out, because $50 in my meager college student life is a lot of money.

I had also pitched the design and meaning (which I will get to later) to my parents and was surprised to hear that they were both in full support of the tattoo. My dad even asked to get a copy of the final design for him to keep. Their support really solidified my decision and helped me see it through to the end. 

In retrospect I think the hardest part of the whole process was not knowing what my tattoo would actually look like until the day of the appointment. All I had to look at was bad concept art that I had drawn.

Little did I know that he would take my terrible drawing (right) and turn it into an incredible work of art (left) that I now adore.

THE APPOINTMENT  June 29, 2018 - 2:00 PM PST

After getting lost in a neighborhood where every building looked the same, I finally made it to his house and it was time for the process to begin. I showed him my rough sketch and a couple of reference photos and in a matter of minutes he came up with a beautiful design (above). 

Before my brain could fully process everything that was about to happen, I was lying face up on a table and a tiny needle was repeatedly stabbing my arm. 

Having had an entire month to think about getting this tattoo, a lot of that time was dedicated to contemplating how much this process would actually hurt. I read dozens of articles about first tattoos online- probably too many for my own good.

Ultimately, the pain was surprisingly little and I tuned it out after a couple of minutes. It felt like a lot of tiny cat scratches, and even that probably makes it sound worse than it really was. However, I realize there are many factors that go into the pain level of a tattoo. My pain tolerance is relatively high and I placed it on my upper arm, which is one of the less sensitive areas of the body.

Before I knew it an hour had passed and I was left with an amazing, one-of-a-kind piece of art that will live on me forever (the picture below doesn’t even do it full justice).

THE MEANING

I have always been in love with flowers, plants, and general nature imagery. It serves as a constant reminder to stay grounded yet remember to grow and blossom throughout your life. 

The flowers I chose are raspberry flowers, which are meant to symbolize the French side of my family. When I was younger we would visit my great grandparents’ little farm in France and pick raspberries from their garden. Even after they both passed, the tradition of picking raspberries and making delicious jams and desserts continue to this day with my grandparents. The large flower represents my dad, and the small bud is meant to represent myself, with a lot of years left ahead of me to blossom into the person I am meant to be. 

The lavender represents the German side of my family. My mom’s parents always had lavender growing in their garden for as long as I can remember, and whenever we helped them pull weeds I could smell the pleasant aroma wafting around in the summer air. The big strand represents my mom, and the smaller one represents my brother.

All these little things come together to serve as a daily reminder not only of staying grounded and continuing to grow through life, but also of the endless love and support I have from my family both here and abroad in Europe. I feel a little bit closer to home every time I catch a glimpse of it on my arm.

In the weeks leading up to my appointment, I kept glancing down at my arm, trying to imagine what the tattoo would look like.  Now, I can’t imagine myself without it. 

[mymeandering-blog]

I Should Never Play Tennis

I should never play tennis (or any other ball hitting sport for that matter) because my follow through is terrible.

As I sit here at 1:00 AM on Friday June 22, I wonder if creating this blog will be yet another venture that I eagerly rush to start yet can’t seem to finish (this is where you realize “ooh she was never really talking about tennis”).

My freshman year of college I wrote in a little black journal every single day from October until August the next year, and I am grateful to have a record to look back on in that formative year of my life. But as great as writing in a journal feels, it doesn’t compare to the satisfaction of my fingers dancing across the keyboard, followed by the quick, melodic sound of the keys clicking away. 

Now as an incoming junior in college, I want to try to document these fleeting years before they get pulled out from under me and I’m thrown into the real world. 

I guess I’m not really sure where this is going to go quite yet, but I do know that I want to get back to documenting my life, thoughts, feelings, learnings, and anything else I might find helpful to write down for myself later on down the road, and maybe even anyone else who might find anything I have to say remotely helpful or interesting (I’m not really sure how, but anything’s possible, right?) 

For now, I’m just going to be using this site as a platform for myself to let out my creative energy and fine tune my writing/storytelling skills in a loose structure. 

It feels good to spew words onto a page, almost like whispering into a void.

I chose the word meandering for my url because the definition resonates with me on some level:

me·an·der·ing (n) “an act of following a winding course.”

That’s all I can do - follow the winding course of my own life and see where I end up, because god only knows where I’ll be two years from now, but I can’t wait to find out.