mysticalbutch

[mysticalbutch]

Hi Devon! I read your work published on substack on autism and asexuality (really great stuff!) and then found your Tumblr and came across your own experiences navigating sexuality and kink, and they made me wonder if you have any advice for a fellow asexual on the spectrum who struggles socially but is interested in experimenting with sex/kink for the first time? People usually find sexual partners on dating apps or at the club but that seems so daunting I've been entertaining this fantasy of finding a community of people with a virgin fetish just so I don't have download tinder

Abandon your fantasy that anything fulfilling will occur without a massive amount of work. Running one's own sexual life requires a high caliber of communication, negotiation, and self-promotion skills, as well as a significant amount of time and experience. If this is worth it for you, venture forth! If not, maybe now is not the right time.

I will have a much more in depth guide on cruising written sometime soonish, but in the meantime I do have some tips.

Do not use fucking Tinder. That is an incredibly vanilla, heteronormative site. You might have a negative impression of your chances finding what you want because you've only had a glimpse of the most normie places and your friends' experiences with them. To find the kinky, experimental kind of sex you want, you'll instead have to educate yourself, and go looking for the freaks.

Fetlife is a good place to start. It will be overwhelming to navigate at first, but keep pressing. Fill out your profile with your interests, take a few sexy photos (whatever that means for you), and join local groups. Follow people who post things you find interesting, read lots of posts. Pick up some books on leather and kink history, and study up. Jack Rinella is a favorite of mine, but I am deliberately keeping my recommendation list lean so that you will dig for what you are interested in, yourself.

Look up local groups interested in rubber, leather, kink, etc, find local dungeons, attend local munch events (these are low-pressure social hangouts with no kinky play, but for kinksters to meet eachother), and find out where the gay bars are in your area that have backrooms in them, as well as cruising spots. Check out spaces where people do kinky or sexual stuff together and just watch.

After considerable information gathering and self-searching, put yourself out there and take agency over your own sexual life. Message people you find interesting, and I do mean just interesting. Learn from other bottoms if you're a bottom. Trade stories with other subs if you're a sub. Learn techniques from other Doms if you're a Dom, or some combination of all these things if you're verse or switchy. If someone shares some interests with you and seems compatible, make a specific suggestion for play, like: Want to meet up and practice our rope tying? or Would you like to practice your spanking technique on me? or I don't like having sex, but I'd love to use you as my personal footstool.

Remember that you get to set the terms for the engagement, and the other person does as well. If they reject you, that means consent has successfully happened, everybody gets a pat on the back, good job. The same goes for you. If all you want is to drag a human puppy around on a leash, don't settle for someone who keeps pressuring you for sex. Just end the interaction. There are a whole lot of freaks out there with a whole array of interests, and most people who are kinky eventually learn to be gracious and work with what a prospective partner is into, but we also all have our dealbreakers. That's fine. You don't want to play football with someone who insists on tackle when all you want is touch. It's the same thing. This is just silly pretend games. So find someone who wants to play a game you want to play.

And yeah, you can expect it to take about two years to really find your footing in this world and really know what you want and how to articulate it successfully, at least. That doesn't mean you won't have enjoyable (or at least interesting, informative) experiences along the way. But it is a lot of work. I find it is better to lead off with realistic expectations because many people rush out hoping that someone will just magically appear who will fulfill all their desires, and that's not how the world works. Every person that you speak to in a kinky context is a full human being with their own anxieties, sexual traumas, shame, areas where they lack experience, and desires that might strike them as impossible to realize.

In kink, you have to learn to navigate really complicated interactions with each one of them as its own independent thing. A lot of us make the mistake early on of thinking everyone else out there is a more seasoned, confident, sexually voracious being than we are, and that all we have to do is find the right person to give us a good time. But with our actions and negotiations WE make it a good time, us and our partner of the moment, together.

If you don't put the work in, you get nothing out. But the more you reveal of yourself and stay present in the interaction and honor it as the specific, unique thing that it is, the more benefits you reap -- not just sex or kinky play, but friendships, community ties, self-knowledge, and social skills.

Have fun out there! I hope you learn a lot.

[mysticalbutch]

wanna slowly corrupt a butch into having a nursing kink….

a butch who confidently answers ‘tits’ when asked the age-old question ‘tits or ass.’ that’s all i need to start with. i know it’ll be so easy to get them obsessed. wearing shirts that draw attention to my chest, low necklines, soft fuzzy sweaters that make such a pleasant rounded outline, tight baby tees, no bra. they’re entranced by the way my nipples poke through to say hello. and during sex of course i tell them to suck my titties, i show them how much pleasure it brings me, i teach them how to suck properly, taking as much of the titty as will fit into their mouth, tongue flat and pressed forward, the hard bud of my nipple against their soft palette.

little by little i start lifting my shirt when they’re bored, restless, when they’ve had a hard day, letting them grab and squeeze, so they associate my tits with comfort, not just with sex. and eventually, after a particularly stressful day, i show them my tits and ask if they wanna suck on them, just for a few minutes, “it’s okay love, i don’t mind, it’ll help you relax.” they’re hesitant and can’t quite meet my eyes but they want to try it. and it works. they feel so very relaxed and safe as i cradle their head and give them gentle scratches and reassure that this is good for them, it’s normal, in such a soft, soothing voice.

but after that first time i wait. i stop offering. i notice the slight desperation in their eyes. the whiny pitch of their voice as they tell me they had a hard day. and i soothe them, of course, but i don’t offer my tits again. i wait until they ask. stammering over the words. face flushed so hot. barely able to admit to themselves that they enjoyed it like that, that it made them hard, in a deep and squirmy way that they’ve never really felt before. not hard in a competent, topping way. hard in a weak, sweet, wanna-be-your-baby-boy way.

but they can’t say any of that out loud, it’s all they can do to ask “can i suck your tits again, the way we did that one time…?” and i reward their bravery, i tell them what a good boy they are, asking for what they need, which only makes them blush harder. but their embarrassment and shame is no match for how fucking good it feels, to be wrapped up in my arms like that, to be held, mouth full and head empty, suckling and floating like all that exists in the world are my soft warm femme tits…

[mysticalbutch]

my sex drive has been extremely low the last few months but I had a vivid sex dream last night omg

[mysticalbutch]

ok I just wanna say if you see a kink on tumblr or wherever that really turns u on and then you try it irl and it doesn’t make u feel the way you hoped it would THATS OK!! You can let that kink live in fantasy!! There are a lot of things that turn my brain on that I don’t enjoy during actual sex!! Isn’t human sexuality interesting!!

[mysticalbutch]

eating a girl out for the first time? as someone with a couple of decades' experience (i started young, ok?), can i offer some advice?

take your time. your aim isn't to make her come as fast as possible, it's to make sure she enjoys every moment. slow down, revel in the process of finding out what she likes.

tell her how beautiful she is, how tempting her cunt looks, how intoxicating it smells, how sweet she tastes. she might be feeling vulnerable, especially if she's inexperienced too - it's your job to make her feel safe and adored.

enjoy the journey - i know you just want to feel your tongue on her clit NOW, but exploring her thighs, working your way slowly to her folds, trailing all the way up her cunt, drinking her juices, letting her feel your breath before she feels your touch...it'll be worth it. for both of you.

learn to read her body with all of your senses. she might be vocal but she might prefer to bite her lip or enjoy being gagged. you don't need to hear her words to know what to do. you'll feel her muscles twitch and relax - learn what it means when she lifts her hips, squirms or sinks into you. she might taste and smell differently when she is close to coming for you. pay close attention to her clit - if you're lucky and you've done a particularly good job, you might see it twitch as she recovers from the perfect orgasm. enjoy it.

you can be vocal though. moan into her. use every sensation you can. light flicks to determined, long, slow licks. blow gently on her wetness. how does she react to your lip piercing? your teeth?

build and add to the experience until she's completely overwhelmed. play with her nipples. run your nails over her skin. lift her legs and spank her.

chances are, she'll get to the point where she really needs you to fuck her. slip your tongue all the way down and inside her. if you can't breathe, you're doing it right. that means you probably won't be able to keep it up for hours, so save this move for when she's right on the edge and you're ready to let her tip over.

if you're especially lucky and she's a squirter, you will get absolutely soaked. enjoy it. show her you're enjoying it. moan into her cunt; she'll come even harder.

if she needs to be fucked harder, slip your fingers inside her cunt and curl them up towards your tongue as it circles her clit. all of her most sensitive nerves will be between your tongue and your fingers. you'll be able to feel every tiny twitch inside her; it's the most beautiful place in the world to be.

when she can truly take no more, stay close to her as you drift away from her cunt. kiss your way up her tummy and her chest, let her taste herself on your lips as you hold her and let her ride out the aftershocks. trail your fingertips over her back. whisper in her ear. tell her everything you loved about eating her out.

[mysticalbutch]

💘 “I am only a poem inside a woman’s body.”

-Alexandra Vasiliu

[mysticalbutch]

Sweater weather 🌟

They/them

[mysticalbutch]

[mysticalbutch]

i’m glad ppl like the ‘i need butches to understand how hot it is when they aren’t being cool during sex’ post but i’m seeing a lot of tags that are like “yes it’s important to be silly during sex! we should both be our goofy selves!” which is true and good but that’s not what i was talking about!! i meant to say that i am dizzyingly TURNED ON by butches who are silly. they make me WET. yes let’s be human during sex but i am trying to communicate that i’m unironically a WHORE for dorky butches. if you blush and stammer some corny nonsense in an attempt to seduce me i will be dropping my panties and bending over. that was not a post abt normalizing silly sex it was a post pspspsppspsing the goofy butches. i want them on my porch, i’ve left out water bowls for them.

[mysticalbutch]

So insatiably needy

[mysticalbutch]

I love just looking at her pretty pussy. Watching her spread her legs and blush while I inspect her. Gently brushing where her legs meet her core and teasing the edge of her lips. Watching her tighten as I get closer to the hole and shake when I blush her clit. It makes me want to fuck her until she cries from overstimulation. Making her go from begging for me to touch her to squirming away from me because it feels too good. Seeing her fucked out expression.

[mysticalbutch]

I’m starving, darling

Let me put my lips to something

Let me wrap my teeth around the world 🗡️

[mysticalbutch]

S q u i s h

[mysticalbutch]

yall know that topping =/= doming, right? yall know that penatration =/= domination, right? y'all know sex positions have nothing to do with if someone likes being pushed around in bed, right??

[mysticalbutch]

💖🧚 pov: you caught your local fairy femme and he's feeling playful 🤭 🧚💖

he/him femme, men minors ageless blogs DNI this includes liking the post

[mysticalbutch]

there’s beauty and grace in the flaws of your face

[mysticalbutch]

The blacksmith