n-y-a-d-a-kurt - Tumblr blog

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

I seem to have accidentally started a makeover service on campus

It's been keeping me pretty busy, and it's been keeping the school much more fashionable. So I can hardly complain about it.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

Welcome to NYADA. I hope you still like to keep busy.

School is...Intense

I’ve never felt so exhausted from having class every day. I need a week long nap.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

I guess I'd call it a vacation? It felt relaxing. "Day at a time"...I guess I got ahead of myself and stopped having that mindset. We haven't talked since then, I thought I'd give him some space.

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend. // PRIVATE

Would you call that a vacation though? Never know dude. Well, take a day at a time you know? Have you guys talked since then? You’re welcome.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

Blaine wasn't talking. Could Kurt blame him? Finding out that while you stayed in love with your exboyfriend, he moved on and fell in love with someone who died...that had to be a lot to take in. Did that mean Kurt should give him a moment, or keep talking? At first, he decided to let Blaine have a little bit of time to wrap his head around it, but he stayed silent and someone needed to say something. It wasn't like he wasn't used to carrying the entire conversation these days, he thought as he looked at Sky's grave before turning back to Blaine.

"I'm sure you're worried about how to treat me now, right? I'll make it easier for you...don't try to get back together with me, because I'm not sure how I feel about that right now." He started, being blunt. It wasn't like anything he was going to say would be a curveball at this point. "But otherwise? Don't treat me differently. It's been a year. I'm finally back at school and I need to finally be treated like a normal person. I'm not going to break into a thousand pieces, so don't act like I'm made of glass."

I've Got So Much Left To Say ↮ KLAINE

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

I just got back from my exotic vacation. And no, of course I don't have wrinkles yet. I'm going to have a lot when I'm older, though. He was shocked, but I probably would be too if I were him. I don't really know what's going to happen with that. And...yeah, I should set an alarm. Thanks for the suggestion.

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend. // PRIVATE

….It’s not? Or go somewhere exotic or something. I dont think you’re getting wrinkles dude. How did he take it? Well, you can always set an alarm on your phone. That’s what I do if I need to make calls and such. And when important dates and due dates for papers.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

That's...not a crazy thought. I think I need to live at the spa for a year and find a miracle facial mask to help with the wrinkles I'm no doubt going to have when I'm older. I...um, I told Blaine. I took him to Sky's grave and explained why I totally freaked out on him when he showed up three days before Sky's death. But professionally, not since I got back. I meant to, but letting my therapist know I'm in town again got lost in the shuffle of going back to school.

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend. // PRIVATE

Ahh I see. Maybe because the atmosphere has changed, you know? Like, your body hasn’t relaxed enough since everything from your past has came back. And you see everything in a new light now, then you did two years ago. Have you talked to someone about it? Besides me and Sam?

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

I watch The Daily Show and they've talked about it a bit.

It mostly feels good, like I'm where I'm supposed to be again. But it also feels like after everything that's happened, I'm sitting in class and worrying about getting my assignments done on time and where the best places to eat on campus are and what shows to go see...It's like I'm living the life I was supposed to live two years ago. Except these shouldn't be the things that matter when...god, I was just worried about surviving for most of the time I've been here. I don't know how to focus on school work but there's...no drastic life threatening problem for once. And that should be a relief. So why isn't it?

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

So you do pay attention to football. Like how weird is it?

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

Wait, two? I only heard about one! 

I don't know...maybe? I think I'm okay. I'm just trying to adjust to going back to NYADA and I'm not going to lie, it's weird.

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

I know, that two quarterbacks are off of their teams. Yeah, kind of stopped when I started dating Brittany. Whatever floats your boat dude. Kind of, yeah actually. I wasn’t for sure if it was me or something.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

Is it? So it's pretty relative to recent events then, huh? I'm glad you no longer watch...those kind of movies. Really. I mean, they're not even...whatever. Oh, during the games! That actually makes sense now! I do because it's a lot more interesting and educational. Yeah, totally. Do I seem off?

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

Which The Longest Yard is about football in the justice system because one of the quarterback’s gotten arrested and got sentenced. Used to, I dont watch Skinemax anymore. I was just saying that you read vogue during the football game.You okay?

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

But not you, Brittany. You're really smart. That's why you like New York.

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

Right..

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

The people who don't like New York just aren't intelligent enough to have their own opinions, obviously. 

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

Aw that’s good! I know but not everyone likes New York as much as others. I won’t deny that you can never get bored though.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

First off, there's plenty of unconvicted felons. Because they get away with committing crimes because they're rich football players. I'm not thinking about any movies or whatever you just named, I'm thinking about the sport of American football. And you watch Skinemax but I don't see what that has to do with anything?

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

There’s no convicted felons in football anymore. Well, the ones who hasnt been caught. And you’re thinking about The Longest Yard. Also, I was kind of talking about video games and such. Well, you read vogue so.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

Oh, well in that case, my definition of fun isn't sitting around yelling at a TV over some ball being run over lines by a bunch of convicted felons.

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

I meant fun, didn’t get enough sleep last night.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

Kurt heard Blaine's words and closed his eyes. Why was Blaine saying it like it was the worst thing that could happen? Probably because it was. Well, maybe not the worst thing, but it was pretty high up there. Kurt thought back to the first few days after, when everyone kept asking how he was. They expected him to be broken and frail, but he was so lost he hadn't even been able to feel that much about it yet. But none of that was true anymore...he was okay now.

After a few seconds, he opened his eyes again and looked at Blaine. The sad, worried look was replaced by strength and he gave his ex a sad smile. "Yeah. My boyfriend is as dead as everyone else he lives with in here." He tried to joke, but it came off way too heavy. This hurt. Not enough to make him cry, but enough to make it slightly harder to breathe. Why was this painful? Sure, having to bring people here was never going to be easy but he had reached a point where he could openly talk about Sky...could he not openly reveal his past with the boy he loved the same way.

Shaking his head, he decided to focus on what was important. "I wanted to bring you here so you'd understand...I mean, I could have just told you but I wanted you to really know." Kurt started. "My reaction to you coming back...that isn't about-" Kurt paused, unsure if it would be a lie to say that it wasn't about their breakup. In part, it really was. His anger with Blaine had some basis in reality and not just coming up with a reason to push him away. Kurt decided to restart his explanation. "You came back just days before the one year mark of Sky's death. I was trying my hardest not to go crazy," He admitted, taking advantage of the figure of speech. "So can you see how...while mourning the death of my boyfriend, the only other guy I've dated showing up out of the blue might totally send me over the edge and upset me? I know that wasn't fair to you and I'm really sorry but...don't let this ruin NYADA for you. Don't let me having a bad few days because of my own personal stuff make you decide that you're going to run back home to Ohio. Because...that's not what I want and I know that's not what you want either."

I've Got So Much Left To Say ↮ KLAINE

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

While that's a very good observation, I'm actually doing pretty good. I've just been only going to my apartment and campus so I thought going out for the day would be good. It is New York, after all.

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

Anyway, how are you? I’m guessing things aren’t good if you’re shopping a lot to make something better?

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

...Right. If you use cash, you don't have to worry about credit card debt.

With no afternoon classes on Friday, I am officially done for the weekend.

That’s true, unless ya use cash.

[n-y-a-d-a-kurt]

Blaine didn't exactly agree to not ask questions, but he didn't protest either so Kurt hoped that meant everything would go right when they got to the cemetery. The rest of the ride went quietly, with Kurt trying to think about what to say to Blaine when they got there. 'Hey, remember that boyfriend I said I had? He's dead. You two should talk about how you've both dated me while I get a coffee' hardly seemed appropriate, even if it did get the job done, so he'd have to come up with another approach.

Maybe he'd tell Blaine the whole story. He could start off with how they had gotten together, how Sky had been a rebound that had turned into more than that and then he got sick and, when you have such a limited amount of time, it doesn't matter how quickly you fell in love because you have to make every moment count while trying to pretend like your relationship is just as mundane as your friends', and while ignoring the way everyone asks you to say hi when you go to the hospital, even though you've been the only visitor outside of his family in weeks. He could tell Blaine about how he fell apart after Sky's death, skipping out on what exactly his mental health problems were and just saying there were issues, and that this was the best he'd been in a long time.

As the car drove up to the graveyard, Kurt got out and waited for Blaine to do the same. "So, this is where we're meeting him. Follow me" Kurt said, a mixture of nervousness and sadness taking over his expression, posture and tone. He was familiar with the path he needed to take, he could do it blindfolded if he had to. Once they were there, he looked back to Blaine and...he couldn't say everything. He couldn't give some tragic life story...He wasn't ready for Blaine to know everything. All Kurt could really do was explain the bare minimum to him. "Sky, I brought someone today. This is Blaine, my exboyfriend. Blaine, this is Skyler...we dated for almost a year until his death, which happened three hundred and seventy days ago." Kurt explained quietly, staring at Sky's tombstone the entire time. "I guess I lied when I said I've been in a relationship since I got here? That ended about as badly as a relationship can end, and that's hardly the worst part about it all being over."

I've Got So Much Left To Say ↮ KLAINE