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[names-for-friends]

haven’t used this blog in so long, let’s dump old art here

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- 47 will use noisecancelling headphones if he does have to use public transportation. (i don’t think 47 is necessarily audio sensitive but noisy backgrounds are something he’ll remove if he can. he’s just rather have the quiet.)

- for some reason i can imagine olivia being able to change a light bulb, but she doesn’t let anyone note about it so that someone else has to help her do it.

part 3 of my terrible hitman headcanons

1. lucas wears eyeliner. you can’t convince me otherwise.

2. 47 hates using any kind of public transport and will do anything to avoid it

3. diana spends her free time talking with 47 about past/future possible assassinations or looking for potential clients/targets

4. no-one in the hitcrewTM knows how to change a light-bulb except 47, who refuses to change them for everyone else (hence why literally every place lucas owns has like no switched on light-bulbs and they just stand in the dark)

5. edwards will only have diet versions of products because he thinks it makes him superior to those who don’t

6. lucas seems like a procrastinator for anything thats not providence related and 47 is the kind of person who gets it done the second he hears about it

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@kakuja06 and i back at it again with thrilling headcanons. the himbo murderer and hobo terrorist are trying their best. 

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hitman except it’s just ica hq headcanons (written by someone who doesn’t remember much about the ica)

- the international contract association seems like it would have fancy and perfect headquarters, but more times than not, it’s the exact opposite.

- they have headquarters worldwide, since it would be dangerous to keep all the ica’s information, etc. in the same place. (programming makes sure that if someone were to infiltrate one of these bases, they wouldn’t ever have enough information to find others, or even really do anything with the information they did find, since most of it was coded to hell or wood just make no sense out of context.)

- some of these bases are ‘proper bases,’ places where you’d expect an organization like the ica to function out of, but most of those bases are for show more than anything (not that the point of this is showiness). the real bases are made to be inconvenient. some are in large areas- beneath decommissioned subway stations, old abandoned castles- things that would not be bothered or aren’t easy to get to. others are in small places or the ones you wouldn’t expect. only a few ica employees are ever in any base, usually ranging from three to five people. 

- different agents prefer to work out of different headquarters. often, none ever stay in a location for too long, but the different style of headquarters appealed to different agents. some were happy to work in the proper bases where nothing much was ever done, since most of these bases were in capital cities. these places were for show. meanwhile, some agents prefer to work in the inconvenient ones, the underground places where the real work was done. 

- 47 prefers the quiet places, like the sapienza safehouse or the barrier island forts, where it’s not very populated. he’d rather, if ever under the roof of the ica, be in a place where he can work alone, unbothered by the rest of the world. meanwhile, lucas, if he were to ever have to give you an answer, would prefer city locations- chicago or bejing. he’s not concerned about the history of the place more than the feeling of it, because he would rather reside in a city setting than a small costal location like his brother. diana does the same, but she likes more historical cities like london or paris, where you can feel life around you and what led to it. as much working as she does, she finds it nice to look out of her window to examine what’s beyond the glass. (olivia accepts it all- anywhere where she can do some hacking and create some chaos. it’s dangerous sometimes to leave her in big cities- she could probably hack the pentagon if she wanted.)

- usually the worst place about these bases is forgetting something in another base. not all communication is done by electronics in the ica- enough handing around documents and sticky notes are done that it’s possible to forget notes or a flash drive. 

- “ah shit. agent taylor, we have to go back to bordaux. yeah, i know we’re currently in st. petersburg, but i forgot the sticky note with my password in the bordaux safehouse.” 

- the ica- certain members of it, at least- will go out of the way to make sure a safehouse or headquarters is ready for any arriving agents. they’ll turn down the thermostat a few degrees if they know 47 will be there, since he seems to prefer 68 degrees over 73 degrees, or they’ll move chairs around if they know two agents are going to want to sit together and way from a third and fourth. the agents seem to know each other well enough to remember preferences of fellow employees. 

- at the end of the day, it’s always the people who make the ica, not the places or the locations or the supplies. you may go years without returning to a specific safehouse or without seeing your favorite agent, but when you return there or see them again, it’ll still feel like home. 

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- olivia knows about this party trick. she, meme lord, actively encourages it.

- 47- who doesn’t understand the significance of the song, olivia tried to teach him- sighs every time his brother steps up to the keyboard. becusde he knows what’s about to happen. he opens his mouth to object but then just leaves.

- lucas tries to microwave the soup can. he’s disappointed to find out you can’t do that. he now eats his soup cold.

- what if he’s just allergic to them and despises it, because what the fuck, but the farm was all he could get

my bad hitman headcanons pt2

1. lucas grey eats tomato soup straight from the can and eats it with a straw

2. 47 uses airpods exclusively

3. diana secretly wants to abolish lidl

4. olivia can play keyboard and refuses to play it on anything other than organ mode

5. lucas can play megolovania on the keyboard and uses it as a party trick

6. he secretlley hates apricots and the only reason he bought an apricot farm was bc it was the cheapest thing he could find

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47’s nose looks like pedro pascal’s and i can’t explain why, it just does

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small additions on to the hunting!au

- 47 has never roasted marshmallows before, and has to be taught how to.

- gabriel!47 accepts the hunting team invitation. it turns out target andrew hanson is a tragedy, becusde despite being a good hunter overall, he’s just terribly loud. meanwhile, 47 is the kind of person who you’d never hear approach you. it scares everyone, especially at night.

- 47 just knows where all the animals are going to be. something about the movement of the wind or a special instinct he has just tells him there’s going to be prey. the team will be searching and all the sudden he’ll point somewhere through the trees and make a small gesture. no one can figure it out until they look hard enough and see he’d spotted a dear. (he’ll avoid pointing them out sometimes, though, because he’d rather just not be hunting at all.)

- @auredosa put this in the tags. gabriel!47, andrew, and their group getting attacked by a bear on night seven. something they did upset it enough to charge. it’s dusk, no one is ready for it, no one has a gun loaded to scare it off, and they’re too far away from the campsite to call for help. but gabriel!47 just... decides to fight it.

- he’s almost casual about it, but it’s his first instinct. he pushes andrew out of the way and just wrestles the bear and eventually chases it off. when he turns around, eveyone is just starting at him, like “what the fuck dude, where did this come from?”

- gabriel gets cool points at the campfire that night

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47 being sent on a contract in the middle of the woods au.

- the target in question is going to be camping at a local campgrounds somewhere in midwestern america. a place that’s out of the public eye, distant from the main roads, yet somewhere where it’s busy enough that this won’t be an easy contract. it’s a woodlands campsite, known for its gorgeous sights, successful fishing, and prominent hunting.

- 47 is sent there a few days early. he knows the layout of the campsite already, where he’s staying, where the target (and fellow group of friends, guards, etc.) will likely be (whether files tell him, or he can guess on the biographical information), etc. his cover story is a new one: someone named gabriel davis, a west-coat hunter traveling to the campsite for a change of scenery. the target is also a hunter; thus might provide a window of opportunity. a bonding moment, an accident.

- being sent to the campsite early wasn’t solely for tactical purposes. 47 has three days before any major crowds would be joining him (since he arrived just before the start of hunting season), and five until the target arrived. diana- a friend of the agent’s just as much as she was his handler- wanted him to have a moment to himself in the wilderness, away from the noisy city he had residence in before. else she would have sent him to the campsite with every other hunter preparing for the season as a cover.

- 47 is adaptable, ready to take on any situation given to him, but this was new in some ways. he was often more used to the town settings of assassination, with buildings or streets to learn instead of hiking trails and footpaths. it would be practice, if all else failed, but 47 never failed. 

- the first days he has there are peaceful. the small area he had to pitch his tent was in a good place: he was back far enough so he could see over where the many other lots were without looking odd or too separated. he’d only brought enough supplies to keep him there the five days until the target arrived, plus another few days for the run of hunting season. he only had the time to set everything up before the sun began to set below the trees, meaning he’d have to collect firewood if he wanted light. (there was a community fire somewhere in the center of the grounds, something 47 would later be able to see as a blob of orange and yellow below him, but he could perfectly well set up his own fire, so why join anyone else?)

- he memorizes the trail map in one night. 

- day two was dedicated to learning the campsite and hunting trails, which meant plenty of waking. this was one of the few times he wouldn’t have diana helping him or reminding him of a few details here and there, for the grounds were just out of reach of most satellite and signals, so using any communications similar to an earpiece or phone would appear suspicious. and anyways, who needed a phone to hunt?

- 47 learns the campsite and most of the important sites and trails by midday. it might be the part where he starts to learn the people there as he learned the places, but he would have the time to do it on day four when people arrived, so he explores deeper into the forest. 

- he befriends a rabbit along the way. 

- most of what he does the next day is exploring the forest as well. he finds a river (it turns out he’s quite good at skipping stones). when he imagined spending time outdoors at a campsite, he didn’t imagine he’d spend an entire day and the evening after exploring the woods, ruining new boots from the dirt he stepped in and tracking stars to find his way home. he wasn’t supposed to leave the main trails, and certainly not at night, but he found himself doing so anyways, running into wildflowers and underbrush critters along his journey. 

- 47 seems like the person who owns a disposable camera and takes photos of things like this when he can. he owns a corkboard of old photos of missions, most from older missions where he was blending in with a tourist population. this is one of the first missions that he pins photos from where it wasn’t for a disguise. 

- one of his shirts rips, and he frets about it that evening at the campsite, lucky he’d thought to bring a needle and thread in case. 

- when hunting season comes along, 47 isn’t ready. for all the participation in the murder business, he’s not particularly fond of hunting. he spends the first two days of visitors learning about his changed environment (which was nosier than he’d like), but also preparing himself for what’s to come. the actual hunting. 

- when the target comes on day six, 47 finds himself a little more prepared. the target brought two friends and no more than a blazer to protect him from a bullet, even if regulations requested otherwise. at the campfire that night, target andrew hanson befriends gabriel davis. whatever personality 47 chose for this hunter alias must have charmed andrew, for gabriel earns an invitation to his hunting group before the evening is over. 

- day seven starts hunting season, and 47 has to remember that this is gabriel davis hunting, not 64-09-05-04-01-47, and it was odd to him that hunting and murder seemed different than one another to him, as though the latter was less significant than the former in all ways. it wasn’t a debate he had the time for, however, he decides as he loads his rifle, which was silenced, scoped, and fancier than most other rifles around him. 

- 47′s outfit includes a red-and-black flannel over white, a black vest, jeans, hiking boots, and a beanie to top it all off. he would admit to himself that, despite all of his extravagant and divine fashion taste, this was also quite nice. maybe a negotiation of additions to the closet were available. 

- the entirety of the seventh day was meant for hunting, and 47 has no fun. he passes many of the turns he’s given; when he finds no escape, he purposefully misses a poor speckled rabbit. it’s obvious he’s a better hunter than he lets on, but when andrew questions it, gabriel pushes it away. he eventually nails a deer. however mush he didn’t like it. 

- gabriel eventually becomes a storyteller to andrew when the hunter asks about gabriel’s experiences hunting. they become friends over the day. 

- the assassination doesn’t take long, it’s framed as a hunting accident on day eight, and 47 had left the campsite long before then. his alibi was that his gun jammed long before the event ever happened, but it would never need to be used. he wasn’t going to be tracked. he felt bad for the hunting to an extent, but it was part of the contract, he supposed. 

- when diana asks about the mission, he isn’t particularly detailed, but his handler knows he enjoyed the time in solitude more than he admitted verbally. she’d make sure to... arrange more contracts in that fashion. 

[names-for-friends]

i made myself plans to finish writing these two longish au/hc posts, but instead of doing it i’ve been designing whole foods 47

this blog was supposed to be serious but now i’m just on my wf au

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@kakuja-shadowclient and i have just figured out the whole plot line, we’ve got it ioi

@names-for-friends we’ve got the whole story sorted now

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47 gets so confused because the mission is so vague. he prepared for anything with this mission, so when he realizes that it literally just a shopping run

i think diana would find it a little amusing, at least

i've been noticing a lot of whole foods talk in the hitman tag,,,

i can picture diana sending him out on some worryingly vague mission and when he looks to see who his targets are it's just like,,,eggs, milk, bread

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i appreciate headcanon one just because i can imagine 47 taking one of lucas’s hats because it looks so good with an outfit, but not totally getting permission for it, and it leads to them arguing whenever 47 returns from a mission

my shitty hitman headcanons

1. lucas owns a ton of hats but never wears them, sometimes lends them out to 47 for his mission outfits

2. 47 really likes chocolate, especially white chocolate

3. diana exclusively shops at whole foods, much to everyone elses dismay

4. edwards was a theatre kid when he was younger 

5. lucas and 47 are twins and olivia and diana always hold a party for them both, but they both hate it 

thanks for coming to my ted talk 

[names-for-friends]

hitman but the next dlc map is at the local suburban whole foods

47 disguises himself as an employee, but instead of being a helpful salesman, he’s just super honest about how useless all the herbal supplements they’re buying are

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finally set myself up a hitman sideblog since i’ve had so much hitman stuff i’ve wanted to post but wasn’t really sure if i should put it on my main

anyways, 47 doodle, i love him