neonpartyrocker - Tumblr blog

[neonpartyrocker]

me. me when a poem says something ive felt before

[neonpartyrocker]

Villains in Addams Family movies go to really unnecessary lengths to defraud them of the family fortune. These people just give it away on whims all the time. If I just walked into the house and started wearing their clothes and spending their money, they wold start introducing me as Cousin Intruder and forget there was ever a time I didn’t live with them.

[neonpartyrocker]

Why are they kissing through plastic wrap? o:

oh my god you dont know what pushing daisies is!!!! people dont know what pushing daisies is!!!!! oh my GOD anon strap in

okay picture this

Brian Fuller’s original 2007 magical realism romantic comedy with a dash of morbidity (after all, this is Brian Fuller we’re talking abt) & fairytale elements

as this review describes: “Characters & plot like Lemony Snicket, sets like Tim Burton, shots like Wes Anderson, rapid witty dialogue like Gilmore Girls, and costumes like uh, frickin’ magic.” 

everything is Super Saturated All The Time and the costume design is literally flawless

starring: asexual bakery man, very tall very kind and himbo-adjacent, has low-level necromantic powers named Ned

Ned is, for convoluted reasons, the accomplice of a film noir detective named after a fish (Emerson Cod) who looks like a hardass but secretly loves pop-up books and knitting

Ned the bakery man is a Piemaker and works in and owns a building that looks like this

(there are novelty cherry lighting fixtures)

he has a dog, who is undead, bc aforementioned necromantic bakery boy has the unique skill of being able to touch dead things and bring them back to life 

he and Emerson Cod touch murder victims, ask them who killed them, and then collect the reward. easy get-money-quick-scheme, UNTIL

Ned’s childhood crush and my life’s icon, Charlotte “Chuck” Charles, gets murdered on a cruise

he touches her once (ONCE) and is never able to touch her again, lest his necromantic powers zap her back to death. hence:

contact-free romance ensues.

 I highly recommend the show for: asexuals, demisexuals, dog people, people who like pie, fashion & costume design enthusiasts, anyone who’s a fan of film noir, people who like pie and dogs and mermaids

literally this show is my absolute all time favorite PLEASE watch it

you can watch both seasons for free here

literally if you’ve ever cared for my opinion at all please watch at least the first episode i beg of u

[neonpartyrocker]

*opens the oven after preheating to 400*

[neonpartyrocker]

Ohhhhh my god u found out somebody has a physically impossible fetish? should we tell everyone? Should we write a callout post?should we invite sigmund freud

[neonpartyrocker]

if you told the me who sat through bucktaylor saying i love you to each other that a few years later oliver stark would be confirming that buck turning around and “whatta man” playing as he saw eddie for the first time was, in fact, buck being attracted to eddie and not knowing how to process that emotion i would’ve dropped dead like a victorian child after shotgunning an energy drink

[neonpartyrocker]

It makes me happy when they listen

[neonpartyrocker]

Okay look. Stephanie Meyer contributed four (4) cool things to the contemporary fantasy genre, which I shall now list here in the hopes of getting it out of my system. In descending order of importance:

1. Writing a story about a girl who wants something. Plot driven by a woman’s (non-vilified) desire. Truly dreadful execution but still a good idea, sort of a literary incarnation of the “he a little confused but he got the spirit” meme.

2. The fact that when Bella becomes a vampire she can still breathe but “there’s no relief tied to the action” which I remember verbatim because it fucking slapped. The idea of human physical sensations being partially defined by our mortality and the sensations still exist after you become undead but your experience of them is fundamentally different because you no longer need any of it? Extremely cool. The closest Meyer came to taking an interesting stance on vampires being dead.

3. Werewolves are immortal but they can literally stop whenever they want. That shit’s hilarious. Curse of immortality who.

4. The fact that vampires don’t sleep or get tired so their communally-raised baby doesn’t have a crib because she is always in someone’s arms. That was extremely cute and there’s a different, better book contained somewhere in that specific concept.

[neonpartyrocker]

HE'S BACK, BABY

EA-NASIR IS HERE FOR US, RIPPING OFF CAPITALISTS

AS PER MY LAST TABLET

[neonpartyrocker]

"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

[neonpartyrocker]

"it's okay, i can peel back the layers of you until i find the soft and gentle core of you you've had to work so hard to hide"? no. no, it's okay, i know you're hollow; i'm here anyway. you don't have to pretend it isn't masks the whole way down. whatever face you want to wear, i still love you. i don't need you to be good or unflinching or the antonym of violence. if i did, i wouldn't be here. i wouldn't ask that of you.

[neonpartyrocker]

[neonpartyrocker]

Top 10 things a good horror move can be:

1: Someones highly specific fetish but put in a different genre

2: An accurate depiction of fears someone has regarding an institution (medical, police, etc)

3-8: Wet

9: Predominantly practical effects

10: gay

[neonpartyrocker]

a wikipedia poem on software entropy

[neonpartyrocker]

—I’m sorry. I didn’t know Pran’s friend would be here too, so I didn’t cook more for you. Let me know if you aren’t full. —It’s totally alright. Don’t worry. I’m a good little boy.

[neonpartyrocker]

got my hands on a field guide of californian bugs and i found that there's this one bee species in southern california that looks like this

(Actual bugs under the cut, CW for insects)

[neonpartyrocker]

society really lost the war when dressing nice / slutty = “gay” “metrosexual” “is he 💅🏻”. we had decades of men wearing crop tops and short shorts without blinking an eye and now it’s ye ole pilgrim standards and talk of scandal if they show their knees