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Everything is so hard all the time has anyone else noticed that

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Everything is so hard all the time has anyone else noticed that

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Everything is so hard all the time has anyone else noticed that

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Everything is so hard all the time has anyone else noticed that

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love my pumpkin

scary my pumpkin

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if you like a piece of media that is good eventually youll more or less run out of things to say about how good it is but if you like a piece of media that is objectively pretty mediocre but also somehow deeply compelling thats how the demons get you

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Thank you!!! It's digital :) I use a paper scan for the background (many are freely available online!) and procreate's 6B pencil brush that comes with the app! :)

playing my tuoy

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I'm curious. Tag this with your sexuality and what your favorite M/F ship is.

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ate one of the berries from the bushes in the woods just a short way outside the monastery and had a terrifying dream of something called 'microsoft authenticator'. it was a great drooling beast; it was a shadow over the people, looming from above, snarling sometimes so that they would remember it was there. i believe it may have been the footman of satan himself. i woke up in the infirmary sweating and shaking

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25.02.2011 ⏳ today's timeline

idk if theres like canon pmmm lore abt it somewhere in an interview madokaheads lmk but i like to think their magical girl forms as being manifestions of their idealised selves while also reflecting certain facets of their psych. which could explain impracticality in battle attire like idk. homuras stiletto heels. sorry i know i knoww its magic its the genre shes a support not dps char their bodies feel less pain re their soul gems etc etc but whenever i watched homuras magical girl training montage i just thought abt how much it must hurt running on those lmao that being said id like to think their magical girl forms Can change like with shifting values or convictions but usually not very noticeably and only with small differences when they do due to their short lifespans. id imagine their forms just becoming dimmer/desaturated maybe with minisculely corrupted design elements like slightly warped motifs/off pattern details before they fall into despair to reflect disillusionment in the ideals and beliefs that manifested them originally. or maybe missing details to show how they dont remember what theyr fighting for. but id imagine them to look just slightly off like theyr barely holding it together before they burst and hatch into witches (itd be very cool to think of rare instances where magical girls hav complete upheavals in their belief systems and narrowly avoid becoming witches to manifest completely different forms instead. still itd just an intermittent form before the inevitable) but in homuras case since shes been a magical girl for around 100 loops i wanted to design a form that could reflect her psych after repeating a decade of adolescent trauma taking aspects of her original manifestation and fracturing, repeating, layering them to the point where it looks like its about to collapse in on itself before crystalising. she has much longer hair to convey how subconsciously she feels like she should be aging. longer sleeves that swallow her hands like clothes she shouldv grown into by now. two bows, the black one of her original length to represent the withered innocence of her wish and the shadow of her despair while its strangled by the bow of her original purple that stubbornly sits on top and stretches past it. added fingerless tactical gloves for her significantly accumulated knowledge in mechanical and explosive weaponry. i wanted to make her outfit giv off more of a witchy vibe too. shrug initially i drew her 1st version with nothing changed from her canon design besides braiding her 2 side bangs and i drew the wider heel on her 10th loop version but i rly wanted to do the diamond heel for her final one and the progression of her heel becoming sharper just made more visual sense if i switched it lol oh also i liked drawing her bangs shadowing so much of her eyes but i thought itd b fun to draw more of her eyes showing to symbolise how she metaphorically can see more clearly now. nothing about her physical non magical girl form changed but i think if homura can use her time magic to heal her eyes she can also use it to idk freeze her hair in a certain position so it doesnt get in the way instead of a haircut ghjfgdfgd anyway its fun for me to imagine her not noticing with how focused she is on saving madoka until one day she sees her reflection and is taken aback at how unrecognisable shes become to herself even while her actual body remains unchanged

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it’s so jarring to see like incest/pedo positivity posts because my mother’s sexual abuse by my grandfather wasn’t some fun kinky adventure—it was deeply traumatic and it literally impacts my mother’s ability to have functional relationships with friends, lovers, and family members. there’s an entire side of my family i know next to nothing about and never met—cuz they ceased contact. the damage it’s done to our relationship is difficult to express. like it’s literally ruined her life and the lives of her children. i don’t see a net positive in any of it.

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☥ THE BEAST LIVES WHERE I LIVE ☥

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Quick doodles of them

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using google keyboard alchemy to create the most miserable emojis possible