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Sharp tongue

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honestly i never thought the phrase “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation

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Pomefiore PJs

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Leona: Enjoying your first day of school? *has called MC to check how they're doing*

MC: It's a bit annoying—not that I wasn't warned.

Leona: Why? What happened?

MC: Am I obliged to tell you?

Leona: *smiles* I can't fulfill my fatherly duties if you don't.

MC: Fine. I had idiots challenging me for no reason.

Leona: Did you win?

MC: Of course.

Leona: *chuckles*

Savanaclaw second-years: *glaring at MC*

MC: What are they all looking at?

Rue: *Ruggie's child* You're dense if you don't know why.

MC: *has become the dorm leader*

MC: I might as well be.

Rue: You'll end up having enemies with that attitude.

MC: Sure.

Ruggie: EH?!! YOU HAVE A CHILD WITH YUU AND THEY'RE IN NRC NOW?!

Leona: Tch. Did you really have to yell?

Ruggie: Wha—This is news to me!

Leona: Yeah, yeah. Rue's studying there too, right?

Ruggie: Yeah... Why? You want them to be friends or something?

Leona: My child needs a servant.

Ruggie: ...

Ruggie: My son will hate me if I ask him that.

Leona: You don't have to.

Ruggie: Are you sure?

Leona: Yeah. They have a leader's charm.

Ruggie: Whoa, you sound like a doting dad.

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Bruce should have a pavlovian trauma response to anything to do with Jason and the Joker and the other kids should 100% use it to their advantage.

Tim: *working in the batcave*

Bruce, walking in: Tim, you’re still here? you haven’t slept in four days, you need to take a break. get off the batcomputer before i lock you out of the system.

Tim:

Tim, blurting out of panic: -JASON’S GONE AFTER THE JOKER AGAIN!

Bruce, jolting up like a skittish deer: JASON NO-

Bruce: *jumps in the batmobile and speeds out the cave*

Tim:

Tim:

Jason, working on his motorcycle next to the now empty batmobile space: he literally said good morning to me like ten minutes ago. what the fuck is wrong with him that’s the third time this week.

Alternatively,

*Jason, walking past Bruce and Damian to leave the manor*

Bruce, chewing Damian out: -and this is the FOURTH TIME you’ve been suspended for fighting, if you can’t control yourself we’ll have to look at restricting your access to Robin-!

Damian: *gives Jason a pleading look over Bruce’s shoulder*

Jason:

Jason: *rolls his eyes*

Jason, as he leaves the front door: OH BOY, TODAY SURE IS A GOOD DAY TO TRY AND KILL THE JOKER!

Jason: *slams door shut and hides behind a plant*

Bruce, muffled from inside: JASON NO-

*crashes, Bruce barrels out of the house and rushes to get in his car and drive off*

Damian, watching him go from the doorway: you have my gratitude, Todd.

Jason, stepping out from behind the plant: anytime, kid.

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The Cradle Tower: Grief, Guilt, and Love

{A/N: This is just me rambling so I might get somethings wrong. Headcanons may slip in. This is a long one}

I don't know if its been talked about, but a thought occurred to me. We're all well aware why Maleficia, Malleus' grandmother, wasn't able to hatch his egg. She was busy with political matters related to the aftermath of the "war" with the Silver Owls and neighboring countries. This led to her only being able to visit Malleus for short periods of time, just enough to feed him magic and love. And we all know what happens next.

But I want to propose something...

❉ ╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤ ✿ ╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤╤ ❉

What if there's another reason why Maleficia couldn't hatch Malleus? He's still her grandson and the last remaining piece of her only child. A constant reminder that Maleanor existed.

That her daughter lived a happy life. She was wedded to man she loved with her whole being and together they bore a son they cherished dearly.

And that's why Maleficia couldn't hatch Malleus.

Because Malleus is her daughter's first and only son.

Maleanor should've been the one standing here in the cradle tower next to her egg, her son. She should be the one lending her love and magic. She should be the one telling stories. She should be the one singing lullabies.

Not her.

Yet here she was. Doing the things her daughter could've done.

What I'm trying to get at is this: What if Maleficia's grief over her daughter's passing stopped her from hatching Malleus? What if her guilt—guilt over not giving her daughter the chance to fully experience motherhood—held her back?

Every time she visited her grandson, she was reminded of what could’ve been if her daughter were still here. Her loud, boisterous laughter. Her exaggerated storytelling. Her stubborn refusal to leave the tower to attend royal duties. Her sweet and gentle singing as she lulled her son to sleep.

Maleanor should've been the one standing here.

And that thought eats her up inside—so much so that, instead of feeding her grandson love, she was feeding him grief and guilt. Maybe that's another reason why Malleus nearly joined the stars?

Maleficia lived for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. Years filled with experience. But her time as a mother was filled with challenges she never expected: secret passageways appearing out of nowhere in the castle, mediating ridiculous arguments, finding her castle in a frenzy over a missing princess or a princess throwing a tantrum, and sharing responsibilities after another reckless act on her daughter’s part.

And yet… deep down, Maleficia would’ve taken those kinds of challenges any day over the one presented to her now.

She’d rather clean up another of her daughter’s messes than plan her funeral.

❉ ╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧ ✿ ╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧╧ ❉

✯¸.•´¨*•¸.•´¨*•¸.•´¨*•¸.•´¨*•✿ ↈ ✿•*¨`•.¸•*¨`•.¸•*¨`•.¸•*¨`•.¸•*¨`•.¸✯

Another thing... For my MalleYuu readers, I have an angst idea.

I'm sure we can all agree that the majority of Yuus are humans. And I've come across some short fics where the reader has trouble giving birth to Malleus’ child, as a consequence of being a magicless human while he is a dragon. So childbirth becomes a heavy burden on the body, whether through oviparity or viviparity, aka laying an egg or giving live birth.

I'm sure you know where I’m going with this.

And for the sake of angst, let's go with the egg route.

So, what if...You had complications at birth where your health is in critical condition to the point where the doctors couldn't tell whether or not you'd make it, and Malleus is panicking. He had to choose on who check on first. You or your guy's child?

Neither of you are in stable condition. The doctors have taken the egg to the cradle tower for monitoring and to stabilize its condition. You two are in opposite direction. With Malleus' current emotional turmoil, using magic nearby may worsen both of your condition. So he had to choose which one he should stay with.

You, barely conscious, push him to go to the egg. You reassure him that you’ll be fine. You're pale, ashen face didn't convince him.

He doesn’t move. Frozen, panicking. He didn't register his grandmother's hand on his shoulder.

“Stay with your beloved,” Maleficia says softly. “Lilia and I shall watch over the egg.”

Outside, the storm lessens.

So he stays with you.

And Maleficia and Lilia go to the cradle tower.

. . .

Maleficia didn't expect to be in this situation again. Taking care of someone else's egg. Yes, the parents are still alive, resting within the castle walls. And she is not alone this time. She’s with a trusted companion. But still, this situation drags her back into the depths of memory and pain.

The old dragon watches silently as a few doctors and nurses examine the egg. Beside them, Lilia hums a lullaby, trying to ease the tense atmosphere.

Maleficia’s hands are clasped tightly together. She finds herself praying for the first time in what must be centuries.

'Mother, if you hear me. Please let this child feel the warmth and love of both of their parents.'

[I don't where the idea came from. But I really like the idea that Malleus is a descendent of the Thorn Fairy.]

✯¸.•´¨*•¸.•´¨*•¸.•´¨*•¸.•´¨*•✿ ↈ ✿•*¨`•.¸•*¨`•.¸•*¨`•.¸•*¨`•.¸•*¨`•.¸✯

{A/N: I have an urge to give angst to the Overblotters' parents. My fic is already doing Mrs. Rosehearts.}

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when you listen to a song and it gives you inspiration to daydream an answer to the plot hole in the story building inside your head

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Inner peace 🕊️🐱😌

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For a truly horrifying amount of time, Ace thought Riddle was taller than he is because of his heels.

I think Riddle's boots would be like 3-4in & have very slight platforms, making him just barely a couple cm shorter than Ace

Ace thought this was normal since he typically saw Riddle in his dorm uniform and just. Didn't think about heels.

After Riddle's overblot & getting to know Ace/Deuce better, sometimes he'd join them for movie night with Yuu (sometimes with Trey and Cater if they do it in Heartslabyul), when he came downstairs in pyjamas and slippers, Ace had his mind blown when he realized their height difference was 12cm and not 2. It's not a lot, but he was astounded that, after a couple months of seeing Riddle every. Single. Day. He hadn't noticed something like that

Yuu makes fun of him for it all the time & Riddle also will tease him for it

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really enjoy when people draw jamil's eyes as dots

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Leona: *has realized he married a woman who immediately takes care of things around the house herself instead of asking anyone else to do it*

Leona: ...Dear, we have servants.

F!MC: And?

Leona: ...

The servants: *look troubled*

Leona: ...

Leona: Prepare some food.

The servants: Y-Yes!

F!MC: I want pizza.

Leona: Yeah, yeah. Do you need help with that?

F!MC: No, but thanks for asking.

Leona: Okay. I'll just be right here if you need me.

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date a selkie, but don’t hide her cloak. let her go home and visit her family now and then, knowing that she’ll come back and hang her seal cloak in the closet like she always does. trust is important.

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time fairy with the ability to forge anything and manipulate the past and future.

First, see what random superpower you get.

Second, see the other half of your powerset.

Lastly, see what character archetype you'll be.

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Headcanon that the first years would all die for each other.

And I don't mean "if we go down we go down together" type shit I mean physically fighting each other for the chance to die so the others live.

Situation: One of them has to be a sacrifice so the others go free and they have to choose who gets thrown off the cliff.

Ace immediately starts running towards the edge because fuck these people are more than friends to him this is the family he always wanted growing up and he'll never admit it to anyone but he'd lose his mind if anything ever happened to them...

Only to immediately get dragged back by Jack who will protect his friends like they're his little siblings and will not let anything bad happen to them if he can help it. He never wants to see any of them die so help him, so he'll take the fall...

But then Epel fucking pounces on him, knocking him down to the ground because he'll be damned if he loses the only people outside of his family that have ever truly accepted him for who he is and support him no matter what. No one will take the fall accept him...

And then Deuce comes in to pull ahead because he knows that he can't just let all of these people around him die just so he could live. They all deserved better, so he'll take the fall and redeem himself, proving that he is everything his mother thought he was...

Which is stopped by Sebek pushing him to the ground to sacrifice himself instead. Whether he liked it or not, he's grown attached to all of these people around him, and even though he had loyalties to Malleus, his friends mattered more in this moment. Besides, he still had Silver and Lilia, and he was sure that he wouldn't be missed terribly...

Ortho is quick to stop Sebek and offer himself up instead however. Given that the original him already died, his brother could just make a new version of himself for everyone, and he doesn't want anyone else in his friend group to suffer the same fate that he, or rather, the original him did...

Yuu quickly pulls Ortho back and starts running towards the edge because if they lose even one of their only ties to sanity in this world they might as well be dead since they'll probably be stuck in Twisted Wonderland forever anyway. They'll take the fall if it means everyone else can survive...

But then Ace trips them and the cycle continues and the gang somehow end up tangled in a pile trying to fight each other for the honor of dying for each other. Whoever threatened them is too distracted and taken out by the housewardens, who are horrified to learn about their first years' lack of self preservation instincts when it comes to each other, but they're all alive so everyone's happy.

TLDR Housewardens: if one of you jumped off a cliff would the rest of you? First years: *thousand yard stare* Housewardens: HEY NO-

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i hate when men complain about women’s body hair, even like the fine hair on their backs. go fuck a shark if you wanna have sex with something hairless